by Ada Frost
“Is it at all possible your attraction to her has governed your ability to think?”
“Don’t be absurd."
“Have you had sex in the office?”
“That – is none of your business,” I snapped and tugged at my collar. Christ, it’s warm in this place. And where the hell was my water?
“Oh my God, you’re blushing.”
“I’m not. The service here is atrocious.”
“Don’t be a snob. Holy crap, I need to save this.” The next thing I knew she had her phone out and snapped a fucking photo of me. “Wow, an actual blush,” she mused in awe.
“This is ridiculous.”
“You’re in love.”
“What? No. We have a…mutual attraction. We enjoy…sex.”
“So you’re going to make me drag you kicking and screaming before you submit?”
“To what?”
“The fact you’re falling for this woman.”
“I like her, I admit that.”
“I believe it’s more than like.”
“You’ve never met her; how would you know? What the fuck is love anyway? What use is it to anyone? It steals your control; it turns you into a fool. I’m not a fool.”
“I see you. I don’t need to meet her. There is love in your life – I love you, Mum loves you, even Sam loves you.”
“That’s different. I don’t love Miss Warner the way I love you lot.” Realising my faux pas, I amended. “Not that I love her. I’m just saying there are different varieties of love.”
“So imagine she never returns to the office. She handed her notice in and you never saw her again.”
It would cripple me. “It would never happen.”
“Imagine it.”
“I don’t have to,” I snapped, glancing out of the window at the rolling countryside.
“Why?”
The sickness in the pit of my stomach and the pain associated with the idea of losing my Miss Warner stunned me. Losing her would be like losing light. I’d struggle to breathe without her in my life. She awakened something in me I never knew was dormant. She caused a vulnerability within me I hadn’t felt since I was a child.
“Because I wouldn’t allow it. I’d fight to keep her,” I muttered. My gaze remained trained on the landscape rather than turning to face my friend. I knew what I would find there. Mockery.
“Lawson, you’re worth loving, you know. And sometimes it’s safe to allow people into your life.”
“Until they leave.”
“If they willingly leave, they were never meant to be there. But then you move on. You rebuild.”
“There is no moving on from her.”
The waitress finally arrived with our drinks. Even though I wanted to snarl at her for taking so long I smiled and accepted with courtesy.
“I know you like control, and this is probably driving you insane.”
“I can’t control her. She’s…she’s…absolute chaos. I never know from one minute to the next how she’ll behave.”
“So don’t try. Maybe she’s the insanity to your sanity. The plus to your negative.”
“Now you’re using clichés on me?”
Brie smiled and snorted a laugh, before taking a sip of her drink. “You were bursting to tell me about her. I never see you like that. It’s rare any of us see you happy, let alone excited. Don’t fight it.”
“What the hell happened to you? You’re going soft on me,” I chided as I gripped her hand and gave it a squeeze. Brie wasn’t usually so mushy about romance.
“My best friend has finally fallen in love; it has awoken my romantic side.”
“Oh hell.” I groaned. When she kicked me under the table, I grimaced but laughed along with her. She was right though; Miss Warner had captured me.
“Lawson, the courier needs you to sign for a package. The parcels need to be handed directly to you,” Scarlet said hesitantly from the threshold of Abigail’s office. I hated Scarlet taking the role of Miss Warner while she was off sick. Two days felt like a lifetime away from her. It killed me not being able to glance up and see her sitting at her desk nibbling on the tip of her pen while she typed. And watching her tight arse wiggle as she pulled something out of the filing cabinet was spectacular.
“Can’t you deal with it?”
She swallowed, and her cheeks heated.
“They’re all parcels addressed to Abigail, but she’s refused to sign for them and has instructed they be redirected to you.”
I stormed past Scarlet into the main reception to see a courier standing near her desk. When he saw me, he stood straight and held out a board and sheet for me to sign. I glanced at the parcels and at him.
“The lady refused them. Said I had to bring them here.”
“I’d have thought she’d grab gifts like this with both hands considering her situation.” Scarlet pondered, peering over at the parcels I’d had specially delivered to Abigail.
I signed the paper and grabbed the boxes. I headed back inside our office and slammed the door, closing Scarlet out. I had no idea what the hell the bitch was talking about.
Abigail had returned her new phone, one I’d enlisted Brie to help me choose so that I didn’t get the wrong one. I needed a way to keep in contact with her while she was ill. I didn’t give a shit that she wanted her freedom. Why would she want her freedom from me?
Both returned parcels of lingerie were unopened. She’d never done that before. I picked them up and tucked them under my arm. I needed some advice.
“Samuel, I need to talk to you,” I stated briskly as I stormed into his office.
“Hey, stocks are up one point seventy-nine percent today.”
“I need some advice.”
He paused in gathering papers together and stared at me like I’d made a deal to take his first-born as a sacrifice. Business, was my top priority. Usually. Not today.
“What?” I asked as I sat in one of his office chairs.
“What kind of advice?” He eyed the boxes, which were clearly intended for a woman with the fancy ass bows. “If you’ve developed a kink for lingerie, dude, I am not watching you model that shit. I draw a line in our friendship for that crap. I don’t need sexy lace spoiled with an image of it trying to contain your junk.”
“Samuel.”
“You’ll have to wax; you know that, right?”
“Will you shut the fuck up. It isn’t for me. And how the hell did you know what it was?”
“I’m a man. You’re not the first bloke to send a present with selfish intent. A little sexy underwear equates to really great thank you sex.”
“Well, she sent it back,” I groused.
“Huh?”
“Abigail, she sent these back. I had them delivered today, and she sent them to me.”
“Did you get the wrong size? Shit, you did. Always go smaller, never go for roomy – trust me. Nothing will get your cock blocked faster than insinuating a woman’s arse is bigger than it is.”
“I’ve sent them before, and they fit perfectly,” I argued.
“Really?”
“Exceptionally.”
“You lucky bastard. Was the baby pink your doing?” he joked, remembering our afternoon pleasuring Miss Warner in the casting room.
“Yeah.”
“Fuck.”
“Exactly. This was a champagne corset with matching heels. She likes those.” I was dying to see her in them. I’d chosen them personally.
“So?”
“She sent them back, why?”
“I don’t know.” He was fucking useless.
“Well, what reason do women usually send shit back?”
“Is she pissed at you?”
“I haven’t seen her. She’s been sick. I couldn’t stand not talking to her, so I bought her a mobile too. But she returned everything.” I sounded like a sulky prick, but I was feeling desperate.
“You’ve done something.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t fri
gging know. Could be anything. They’re not exactly the most stable sex. Maybe she’s on the rag.”
“You think?”
“Women are freaking scary when the decorators are in. It’s like hormonal overload in the studio when a few of them are heading to that time of month.”
“Hmm. Could be that.”
“So are you going to see Abby?” he asked.
“Do you think I should?”
“It’s the only way you’ll find out why she’s avoiding you.”
“I wouldn’t say she’s avoiding me, per se. She’s just not...well, I’m not entirely sure what’s going on with her. Scarlet made a snarky comment about Abigail needing the presents in her situation?”
Samuel’s posture changed slightly. “Meaning?”
“I have no fucking clue. Jealousy probably. Maybe her cold has caused some neurological damage.”
“Yeah, because that happens.” He laughed. “Stop being a pussy and go find out.”
I hated when he was right. Smug prick. I stood ready to leave.
“Hey, did you ever read Abby’s personal file?”
“No. Why?”
“Just wondered if curiosity had gotten to you.”
“I know all I need to.”
Sam nodded slowly. I turned to head out of the office.
“By the way, you can thank me later.”
“For what?” I asked confused.
“Matchmaking.”
“Fuck off,” I snapped.
“It’s true, you stubborn arsehole. Without me, she would have left the office that day, and you’d still be a miserable prick getting frostbite on your dick.”
“God, I cannot wait for the day you fall in love. I’ll be there to watch you fall and laugh my arse off when you fuck up.”
“Never going to happen.”
“You think you won’t fall in love?”
“No, I’m too perfect to fuck up.”
Bastard.
Gripping my parcels, I walked away to the sound of his smug laughter. Heading to my office to grab my coat and car keys. I wanted answers, and I was damn well getting them.
Luckily, when I pulled into Abigail’s drive, my temper had somewhat calmed, but my nerves were fraught. My mind was racing with reasons as to why she’d return everything.
Was it too much? Did she think I was trying to buy her? Did they not fit? Was I no longer enough?
The parcels sat in the passenger seat, a blaring reminder I had done something epically fucked up. Before I could talk myself out of it, I got out of the car, closed the door, and locked it. As I headed toward her door, I made the foolish mistake of checking the car and noted I’d parked slightly skewed.
“Ignore it,” I muttered to myself.
Raising my hand, I slammed my fist against the front door. I straightened my jacket and tie before hammering against the door again. There was no way I would leave until she spoke to me and explained returning my gifts.
The door finally opened, and my snotty, red-nosed girlfriend appeared. She squinted at me.
“Lawson?” she said groggily, but I’m sure I saw a flash of panic in her eyes. What the hell?
“We need to talk.”
“I’m really not up to it.”
“I’m not leaving, so you may as well open the door and let me in.”
“Lawson, I’m not well. Go home, we can talk another time.” She started to close the door, so I slid my foot through the gap, preventing her from fully closing it, hoping like hell she didn’t slam it and break my foot.
“Abigail, I’m not leaving.”
She huffed out an exhausted breath, and her shoulders slumped. Guilt suffused me at how weak she looked. Finally, she opened the door and turned to head into the house without waiting for me. I closed the door behind me and shivered.
Christ, it was cold.
“What did I do?” I asked without preamble.
“Nothing.”
Great, one word answers. Shit was bad.
“You’re angry.”
“I’m fine.”
I worked with enough women to know fine meant the absolute opposite, and she was close to cutting my balls off.
“What did I do?”
“It’s not what, but who, you did.”
“Huh?”
“Although, she is incredibly beautiful, so I guess I should feel flattered you looked at a slob like me when you had her.”
“Abigail, you’re freaking me out. Has the snot totally fucked up your mind? Do we need to get you to a doctor?”
“Don’t you dare...develop a sense of...fucking humour at a time like this.” She coughed so much I was scared she would choke to death.
“Take it easy,” I pleaded, stepping toward her.
“It hurt...” she didn’t finish before her coughing took hold and wouldn’t let her speak. I grabbed the bottle of water from the table and handed it to her. She snatched it from me and gulped it down.
“You okay?”
She nodded but looked completely worn out.
“Why did you return everything? I don’t understand what I did wrong. Let me fix it. I have no idea who the woman is you’re talking about.” I didn’t comprehend this game.
“I came back to the office and saw you with her. The love of your life. Your fucking girlfriend. Stupidly, I thought that’s the title I held.”
”Still have no idea what you’re referring to.”
“Brie. I saw you with her,” she screeched and started another painful round of coughing. It was like a light bulb suddenly switched on, and I realised what she was so upset about. Crazy woman. I pulled out my phone and dialled.
“Brie, do you know my infuriating girlfriend I was telling you about?”
“Yeah.” She laughed.
“Can you meet me at my house? I would like you to meet her and explain that I am not fucking you, and that I spent the majority of our time together talking about her even though I haven’t seen you in two months.” I watched the paleness of Abigail’s skin turn a stunning pink as my words penetrated her infuriating stubborn brain.
“O — kay.” Brie drew out the word, and I could hear the hesitancy in her voice.
I ended the call without a farewell, and I knew I’d get shit for that later.
“Brie is Marie’s daughter. We were practically raised together. I miss her when I don’t see her, because she’s one of the few friends I have. I adore her, and yes love her completely as any man would love his sister. She surprised me the other day by coming by the office. I hate her near that place. We had lunch, which you would have been invited to had you been well. Anything else, Miss Warner?” I smirked.
“That could have been a ruse.” She stuck her chin up in utter defiance.
“You honestly believe that?” I growled. She had no idea how much her mistrust hurt.
Her shoulders slumped, and she lowered her head until her chin touched her chest. “No, I just don’t want to admit I’m an idiot and have spent the last two days snivelling into my pillow nursing a broken heart.”
“You could have just asked.”
“Well, that seems simple, doesn’t it? I’m not the confrontational type,” she said cocking her eyebrow at me. My expression called bullshit. “I was aiming for dramatic and got it totally wrong.”
“It’s all the snot. It’s broken your brain,” I said, stepping toward her, needing her in my arms. It had been too long without her in my embrace. This insufferable woman had somehow become a part of me. She’d snuck inside me, bypassing all my defences. She’d slain my arsehole behaviour and found my soft centre.
“I’m sorry. And I’m sorry I called her names,” she huffed, leaning into me and wrapping her arms around me.
“You didn’t call her any names.”
“I did in my mind. They were nasty too. I’m a bitch when provoked, I get all stabby when a bitch tries to steal my man.” She sniffled, and for once I didn’t care if she was getting shit on my suit. I just needed to hold her.
“I would never have guessed that about you.” I chuckled.
“What hurt more than anything, was she made you laugh. Don’t give your smiles away,” she muttered sleepily.
“Are you ready to meet her? She’s the female equivalent of Samuel. Without the sex...so please don’t get any ideas about her joining us. I’d struggle to perform.”
Abigail snickered against my chest before her coughing started, and it sounded worse than when she left the office two days ago.
“Did you go to the doctor?”
She pushed away from me and pulled a disgusting tissue from her sleeve. “No.”
“Why?”
“I just wanted to get home.” Something in her tone made me question the truth in her words.
I noted the amount of layers she had on and the temperature in here.
“Why haven’t you got the heat on?”
“I needed to cool down. My temperature’s been high.”
“So that would explain why you’re dressed for the arctic.” Sarcasm was thick in my voice.
She curled up on the sofa and pulled a quilt and numerous blankets over her. She appeared zapped completely of energy.
“I’ll make you a drink.”
“Water is fine.” She coughed, sounding dreadful.
“I need a drink then.” Without waiting for an answer, I found my way into the kitchen. It was tidy, homey. I filled the kettle, switched it on, and went to the fridge to get some milk. When I opened the door, there was nothing in there except three out of date sandwiches from the office. No milk. The fridge wasn’t even working. I glanced over my shoulder and noted the kettle wasn’t making a noise either.
“Abigail, is your electricity out?”
“Yup,” she croaked.
How could she be without electricity? That’s when I noticed her gym bag, the one she always carried with her around work even though I’d yet to see her in the gym. I’d tried many times to catch her, just to watch her lithe body move. It was full of dirty laundry. She had a washing machine under her counter.
“Is your washer broken?”
“No.”
“How long has the electricity been out?”
“Just today.”
Remembering the sandwiches, I opened the fridge and pulled them out and pressed my foot down on the peddle bin to open it, ready to throw all the out of date crap away when I noted many more empty cartons.