by Dawn Gray
"What is it, Ash?"
"I'm sorry Julian, but this house. It scares me." He leaned down, close to my ear, and whispered to me as his warm breath brushed my neck.
"It scares me too." He took my hand and led me into the lobby of the house. I glanced around at the high ceilings, with its five low hanging chandeliers, the double door, and large back windows that led to the back yard.
"Michael, David, and Quinn should be around here somewhere. They wanted to see you when we got home," he yelled to me. I turned toward his voice and followed his body as it climbed the stairway to my left. Twelve steps to the platform, five more steps to the next, five more steps to the left again to the long, brightly lit hallway of the second floor.
Quinn was not the one I wanted to think of at that moment. Although, I couldn’t help wondering, if he was gone with them how did he spend the last months comforting me? I felt so strange, so out of place, so terrified by this strange house. The same feelings I had gotten from Quinn, although I had never been in it.
I began to walk down the rest of the hallway. I had gone passed only two bedroom doors, all were to my right, before I came to another stairway on my left. Its bare white steps seemed to unfold before me and, as I climbed the six steps up, into the darkness of the third floor. I turned left and followed the eight steps into its complete darkness.
I began to walk in that direction, stepping in and out of what little light seemed to be coming from the windows to my right. I stopped at the very last door on my left side and turned the handle slowly. The door opened, without creaking as I thought it would, and I looked inside.
Despite the looks of the hallway outside, as I stepped into the room it appeared quite comfortable. It was furnished with a large, four-poster bed of antique quality, with a canopy and mesh drapes that hung down from each post to add privacy. It had a large six-drawer dresser, a dark cherry colored wood, with brass handles and a large oval shaped mirror on two sturdy posts. The window, a bit larger compared to the ones in the hallway, let in more light to see the beautiful artwork that covered the walls, hand painted onto the wood itself. The window was draped with a long black curtain that was pulled to each side to let in the light. The curtains moved in the wind from the open window.
I stood by the window and looked out over what Julian had once called a small back yard. His small back yard was about four-acres of land that stretched down to where it fell off into the ocean. Also, five acres stretched to each side of the house, all surrounded by the blue of the ocean.
"I was worried that you had gotten lost." I heard Julian's soft voice as it came closer to me. He had the quietest way of walking. I never knew that he was behind me, but I never felt scared. "What are you doing up here?"
"I'm sorry." I turned to him as he stood by the end of the bed. He stepped closer and touched the dark hair that was on my shoulder. "I just seemed to be drawn here. It is beautiful though, all these paintings. Do you know who did these?"
"I did. This is my room," he replied softly. He smiled at me and looked around at the room. "When I felt crowded and didn't want to be near anyone I would come up here and paint. I stayed up here for three weeks after we met. After you went home I just painted the nights away because the day, when I got to see you, never came fast enough."
I suddenly felt flush, as if his closeness made me nervous, he sensed it and backed away. I reached out and grabbed his hand.
"Ash, maybe we should go downstairs, the others might be getting curious."
"Julian, please." I pulled him closer to me, just by tugging his hand. I watched his face flush, as if he felt the heat that I was feeling. "I've waited eight months just to hear your voice again. The others can wait; all I want right now is you."
"Ashley." His voice was like a desperate cry for me to do something, move away, or come closer. He couldn't seem to figure it out. His lips touched mine softly, and then he suddenly pulled back. The look on his face, the way he glared at me, told me that he was holding back. "We really should be getting downstairs." The tone of his voice was demanding, but it seemed that he was using his will power to make me go. I shook my head at him and then smiled, the seriousness in his face faded quickly. "What?"
"It's not going to work, Julian. Remember what I told you when we met. I'm used to getting my way." I smiled at him. He grabbed me, quickly, wrapped his strong arms around me and kissed me hard on the lips. It wasn't a forceful kiss but it was full of fire. When he backed away this time, he just looked at me and then he walked away.
Confused and angry at the same time, I left the house and began to walk the beach. It kept running through my mind, the way he kissed me, and then how I knew what he was trying to do and how he was doing it. I had gotten half way home then I turned around and walked back. I walked right through those double glass doors, listened for the sounds of the boys in the sitting room, watching TV, and marched right in there.
Michael and David sat straight up and looked at me as I stood directly in front of the television. Quinn smirked at me, but the only one I had my eye on was Julian. He didn't move, didn't move a muscle, he just stared with those green eyes.
Do I feel right to you now, Julian? I asked him with my mind, something I hadn't intended on trying at first, but something just told me to try. He stared even harder now, but the slack of his jaw told me that I indeed had been heard, but he didn't answer. My patience grew thin and I was confused, so my anger won out. "Damn it, answer me," I yelled forcefully. Michael, David, and even Quinn looked at Julian, but there was still no answer. "I know you heard me, Julian. I want to ..."
"Yes."
I watched the eyes of a boy I had met a year ago, turn into the eyes of a man who had seen a lot more summers than I could count. I inhaled and the tears began to flow. He stood up and walked over to me, grabbed me by the upper arms as my knees began to give out and held me with a sturdy grip.
"You have always felt right, even when we first met on the beach. Before we spoke, when I looked into your eyes, I knew you," he told me, teeth still clenched. He was trying to hold in the emotion. I shook my head, closed my eyes, and let my body slouch. He came to the floor with me as I knelt there, but he wouldn't let me go.
I stared him in the eyes then reached up and cupped his face in my hands. He closed his eyes and leaned into my touch.
"Julian, what are you?” His eyes were full of love, trust, and fear. "I'm not going to hurt you. I wouldn't ever dream of it, but I have to know. Why do I know you? You swim in my brain; you hold my heart like an iron clasp. I can't get you off my mind, but then again, you can read it. You try to use your thoughts to make me do things."
"And you resist them with every ounce of your being," he whispered to me. "We're not so different, you and I."
"You make me crazy." I let him go and looked up at the ceiling then at him and the others. "How old are you?"
"Well, Quinn's eighteen and David, here, he's seventeen. I'll be eighteen in a month and Julian's ..." Michael started. I looked at him and glared. He sat back down and I looked at Julian again.
"You think this is going to freak me out, don't you? You think I can't handle this," I said and looked at him, dead in the eyes, and I stared until he looked away. When he did, I turned his face back. "I know, Julian, I know you." I stood up and looked down at him. "I know what you are, all of you. I know because you feel right to me and you can't fool me forever. Trust me."
I left. I couldn't take the stares anymore. I ran out into the rain and ran for the beach, but I slipped. The ground gave way under me, and I fell for what seemed like forever, into the darkness, the total darkness of some kind of underground cave. It was damp and musty and it smelled like dirt. I closed my eyes, having hit my head on the way down, and then I don't remember anything but darkness.
When I came to, it was still dark but as I looked up through the hole in the ground, and saw the stars in the sky. As I adjusted to the new surroundings, I noticed that the area around me was solid stone. I sudde
nly noticed a large stone box in front of me. I felt its lid with my fingers, and as I traced the cross on the lid, I realized that this was a stone coffin, like ones you see in mausoleums. My body began to shake and I stepped back. The darkness seemed to start to whisper to me, and the noise became unbearable.
"JULIAN!" I yelled both in my mind and with my voice, and then I huddled in the corner. It seemed like hours before I saw the faces staring down at me from the opening in the roof of this grave. The light from a flashlight shined down on the lid of the coffin and I saw it clearly for the first time. It made me shutter.
"Ashley, are you all right?" I heard David yell.
"Get me out of here please."
"Quinn and Julian are on their way. It's almost a maze down there so it might take a minute." I sighed and closed my eyes. "Ashley, are you hurt at all?"
"My head hurts. I hit it on something when I fell." My eyes started to see nothing but blackness with little white dots, but I struggled to keep them open. It took almost five minutes for me to see the two figures walk through what, could have only been, a door. One of them leaned down and touched my face. "Julian," I whispered. As I felt him scoop me up in his arms the blackness took over again.
2
When I awoke, the light from the morning sun was streaming in the window. I was in a large king-sized bed, covered with a small throw, the walls around me were bright white, and the curtains were drawn to let in the sun. I glanced around this strange room then sat up a little to see if I was alone. I wasn't. Julian was sitting in a large comfortable chair, next to a fireplace, reading a book. His long black hair was pulled back in a ponytail, exposing his childish features to me. I sat up more and stared at him as he read. Then suddenly he looked up at me, put the book down, and stood up.
Neither of us said a word as he walked over to where I was sitting on the bed and sat next to me, facing me. He reached out with his hand to touch my face, but as his fingers touched my skin, I moved away. He curled his fingers away. His expression told me that he was trying to decide if he should try again. He reached for me again and rested his hand on my cheek.
"Where was I last night?" He brushed the hair from my face and smiled, slightly.
"It's an underground cemetery. My family has lived here for centuries and they've all been buried in the catacombs under the backyard." Julian sighed. "I thought I lost you last night, when you left, the first time, I mean. I thought after I kissed you that you wouldn't come back."
He turned towards window, then back at my hands. He took my right hand and held it tightly. "When you came back and you started to ask me all these questions, I wasn't ready. I didn't know how to tell you all the things you want to know."
"Can you tell me now? The others aren't around. This may be easier since it's just you and I." Julian stood up and walked over to the end of the bed. I waited patiently for him to start talking, but it was awhile before he did. When the time came, he turned to me, while he held onto the footboard of the bed.
"My parents died in France, three years before the beheading of Marie Antoinette. They left my brother and I to care for us. I was sixteen at the time, and Quinn had just turned ten." Julian moved over toward me again and sat down. "A man named Victor La Rouge took the two of us in. He moved us out into the country shortly after that. He told us it was to protect him and us.”
"We started to notice how he would come out of his room, a place we weren't allowed, only in the afternoon. He looked pale and tired all the time, but he had so much energy. He taught us to read, write, and to do math. He also taught us to fence and ride a horse. Quinn started to see him as our Father, probably because the tragedy of losing ours was still in his mind. He worshiped Victor, but I couldn't take him any longer."
Julian held his eyes closed tightly for a few moments, then he opened them, the green was gone, and they were dark brown now. The color seemed to hold a world of knowledge in them.
"One night,” he began again, "we fought, violently. I didn't like what he was doing to Quinn. He was my brother and I had to protect him. We had been with Victor for two years. I was eighteen and I was defiant.”
"In the middle of our fight, which consisted of everything from insults to fists flying, Victor did the most awful thing anyone had ever done to me. He lunged at my neck, his jaw clamped over my skin, and he bit into me. The pain shocked me and I couldn't move. All I could do was hold onto life, while listening to the sounds of my own fading heart beat. I passed out, the blackness engulfed me, and I thought I was dead." He waited to see any signs of disgust but, I myself was a storyteller and I found this quite interesting. "Do you believe what I have said so far?"
"To not believe in things that are impossible would make most everything that you do improbable." I had never heard of such a saying before. And, at the time, I couldn't figure out where it had come from. Julian smiled.
"When I awoke,” he continued, “I was in a dark room, surrounded by candles. My neck ached, my body was numb and my heart had stopped beating. I was dead, but then again, I was alive. My eyes felt strange, everything seemed to be breathing life. My own hands were blue, cold as ice, but I could almost feel the lives of every other person in the house. I got up and pulled open the door, it was very heavy, almost solid cement and I walked out and up the long dark staircase to the main floor of the house.”
"Everyone acted as if nothing had happened, the furniture that we had broken had been replaced and there were no indications that we had ever fought. It wasn't until Quinn came bouncing in the room that it all became clear. I couldn't look at him, so I left.”
"I was out in the woods for over a week and the burning in my veins became unbearable. My body hunted down a girl, who was picking berries in a nearby field, and I just attacked her. Latched onto her neck like Victor had done to me. I killed her, I drank her life, and it filled me. My heart began to beat, my flesh warmed and my pale complexion seemed to become tan. I was a monster."
"A vampire?" Those eyes that had once again changed color, and nodded, then looked back at my hand.
"I stayed near the home. I'm sure Victor knew I was there, but he never came after me, never invited me back. I watched after Quinn, tried to help him whenever I could. For six years, I watched him live a normal life. He had actually been engaged to this beautiful young woman, but Victor didn't approve. I watched, one night, as the events unfolded into what turned out to be a replay of everything that happened to me the night I had turned. Quinn was now one of us, but Victor didn't let him leave; he kept Quinn there and taught him everything that I had learned on my own over the six years.”
“I had been alone." Julian stood up once again and walked over to the fireplace. He stared at it, for a moment, and then the logs in the stove burst into flames. "Quinn was his protégée. His child and I was just a bastard."
"You aren't, Julian, and you’re not a monster."
Suddenly, as if there had been no space between us at all, Julian was on the bed, towering over me. I lay back down on the bed and looked at his face. He knelt there, on his hands and knees, his hair, as black as night, had come out of the ponytail and it hung around his face. His eyes began to glow, first silver, then red, a snarl formed on his face, and his teeth, his canines, grew as sharp as knives. This all in a matter of seconds, but I watched it as if it were in slow motion.
"I am a monster, Ash. One of the worst there is. I hunted, I killed, and I liked it. I've killed girls your age." His breath quickened, as if the violence level had risen, but I remained calm.
I thought for sure he was trying to scare me. Slowly, as I looked into those bright red eyes, I turned my head to the side, moved my hair and exposed my neck. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched his face. His eyes locked on the blood that flowed through the veins there. He lowered his body, to let it rest on mine, and then he grabbed my wrists, and held them. He moved closer and I saw his jaw open, I watched those teeth come closer to me and I closed my eyes.
I waited for the pai
n to come, the moment when his teeth punctured my skin. Instead what I got was two soft lips caressing the skin on my neck, warm breath tingling my nerves, and a low growl of what I thought was a cat in my ear. As the kissing continued, I didn't resist. This was what I wanted, and then I realized that he was who I wanted. I wasn't sixteen anymore. I felt older. I felt as if my world finally made sense.
Julian grabbed my chin and turned my face toward his. The teeth had gone back to normal, and his eyes held only traces of the anger that he had held before. He still was breathing rather heavily, but when he locked onto my eyes, it eased.
"I'm not afraid, Julian." He let go of my wrists and slowly glided his hand down my bare arm until he rested his hand at my side, then he pushed himself up, so that he towered over me again. "You would never hurt me."
"You took a big risk, Ash. I could have killed you." He gently ran his hand through my hair. He cupped the back of my head with that hand and held me there. "I never know if I can control my nature, especially when it comes to you. Don't ever do that again!"
I smiled at him, defiantly and turned my head again; he whipped it back, leaned down and kissed me hard on the lips again. Slowly, as he back away, I opened my eyes and looked at him. He closed his eyes, for just a moment, sighed and sat up.
"You push your luck, too far, sometimes Ash." He sat at the edge of his bed with his back to me.
"I test boundaries. I cross lines. I have always been this way." He didn't look at me. I pulled my knees to my chest and hugged my legs close to me. "My mother always hated me for that. My father never could figure out why I was so different from my sisters. My sisters could never understand why I had to be so rebellious. I was the odd one, not like them. I'm not one of them." I suddenly realized what I had said and how much sense it now made. Sitting in this house with this young man, who had just proven to me that he was a vampire, I realized why I felt the way I did toward him.