* * *
As she walked into her bedroom, she was aware she was smiling.
Immediately she frowned. She felt light. Almost bubbly. Could be the fact that she hadn’t had much sleep in the last week. Or the week before that. Or that she was simply lonely and enjoying having people around. Although the fact that she’d hidden herself in her office most of the night probably negated that.
Or maybe it was that the two men in her house were complete hunks and for the first time since Dave died her body felt alive. She was interested. Aroused.
She nearly gasped at that realization.
She shouldn’t feel like that, right?
It felt like a betrayal. Dave had been everything to her. She’d loved him with all of herself. Had planned on spending the rest of her life with him.
Dave’s gone.
Confused, upset, she moved to her bed and picked up her stuffed bumblebee, Bumbly. She’d always loved bumblebees, but this toy was special because she’d picked it out with Dave. She also grabbed her snuggly, which was actually just a shirt cut up. Dave’s shirt. When Dave was alive, she’d had a soft, fluffy pink blankie. After he’d died, she’d started sleeping in his shirts. But they hadn’t exactly been comfortable. So she’d taken to sleeping with one of his shirts next to her, cuddling it. In the end, she cut one up so the buttons didn’t end up under her face as she slept, leaving little indents in her skin.
She rearranged the giant sleep pillow. It was long and curled at the top so she slept surrounded by it on both sides. She knew it was something that pregnant women usually used to help support their bellies. But she liked the feeling of being enveloped by it. Like she was in a giant hug.
The kind Dave used to give her.
She climbed into bed and drew up her covers. Her sheets were white flannel with little dachshunds on them. And her duvet cover matched. She pulled Bumbly close. Dave had taken her to a shop in Bozeman to get him, one of the few times they’d been into the city.
As soon as she’d seen him, she’d known he was the stuffy for her. Bumbly was the cutest bumblebee ever, in her opinion. But even better, was what he represented.
A time in her life when she was completely and utterly loved. Safe. Cherished.
Tears dripped down her face. Guilt filled her. She shouldn’t be reacting to Isaac or Archer. It wasn’t right. She wasn’t ready.
She couldn’t say goodbye. Not yet.
9
A strange feeling filled her as she stared down the tree lying across the road.
She couldn’t figure out if it was worry or relief.
She didn’t think the wind had been that strong last night. Usually powerful winds freaked her out. But this tree looked old and rotted. It probably hadn’t taken much to push it over. And this was further down the mountain where the wind could really rip through.
What was she going to do with the two Docs now?
She’d gotten up early, surprised when she’d been able to sneak past Doc. He didn’t seem like the type to miss much. But he’d been snoring softly, his feet hanging off the end of the sofa. She should have pushed harder for him to take her bed. He was probably going to wake up all stiff and sore.
Not that she probably would have been able to convince him. He was more stubborn than an old goat.
She’d wanted to check the road, see if it was possible for her to drop them off at Murray’s this morning. The earlier the better for her peace of mind.
Uh-huh, like you really want them to leave.
That was the problem, wasn’t it? She didn’t want them to leave and she felt guilty about it.
Dave wouldn’t want you to feel this way. Dave wouldn’t want you to be alone. At least, she didn’t think he would.
She’d already checked the creek. Completely flooded. That’s when she’d decided to check the road into town and had come across the downed tree.
It seemed that Archer and Doc weren’t going anywhere for at least another day. She started turning her truck around. She’d best get back to the cabin before they got up.
Why was she worried about that? They weren’t the boss of her, she could do whatever she wanted. Just because Doc told her not to get out of bed until ten didn’t mean she had to obey him.
You’re a big girl.
Kind of.
Still, she felt nervous as she turned up her driveway, the truck bouncing along potholes that really needed fixing.
She’d have to add that to the list. Maybe she could get a hire-a-hubby. Did those still exist? Get everything done in one swoop.
You could hire an assistant. Urgh, but she’d need someone who was kink friendly. She’d just lucked out when she’d found Daisy to edit her books. Not only was she an amazing editor, she was also a Little. With her own Daddy.
Maybe you should visit her one day.
Sometimes she worried they weren’t really friends. After all, she paid Daisy to edit her books. She kind of had to be nice to her, right? If they really met, Daisy might find out that Caley wasn’t all that interesting or fun. That she was kind of absentminded and likely a terrible friend.
Yeah, best they don’t meet then Caley could at least keep up the idea of having a friend out there, rather than knowing she was all alone.
She pulled up outside the cabin, turning off the truck. The door to her cabin opened and two clearly furious men stepped out.
Uh-oh.
She’d expected that Doc might be a bit annoyed that she’d snuck out past him. He seemed the type who liked to control everything and everyone around him.
She’d seen glimpses of fire in him. Hot to touch, dangerous when he burned. Archer was cooler. Calmer. But there was something under that carefully presented surface.
And both of them were glaring down at her from the porch, hands on hips, their stances so similar she’d almost think it was choreographed if she didn’t know them. It was obvious there was tension between them
Despite whatever seemed to be going on between them, it seemed they had united together about one thing.
Her.
She wasn’t sure that boded well for her.
When she didn’t leave the truck, they obviously grew impatient because one of them started down the steps towards her.
What surprised her was that it wasn’t Doc but rather Archer who came towards her. He opened the door to her truck.
“Um, good morning.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Is it?”
“You didn’t sleep well?” she asked.
“I slept fine. It was when I got up that the problems arose.”
“Oh, sorry. Couldn’t you find any breakfast?”
His eyebrows lowered. “That’s not the problem and you know it, love. What did you think you were doing, sneaking off like that?”
“I wasn’t sneaking off,” she huffed. “This is my house and my truck and I’m not obliged to tell anyone where I go or what I’m doing.”
A shutter came over his face and he stepped back. That heat faded. And at once she felt empty. A little sad. She’d expected him to bite back.
She hadn’t expected him to retreat.
“Of course not. I apologize for worrying about you.”
She winced at those words. Seemed that maybe she should be the one apologizing. She opened her mouth to tell him that she was sorry, that she wasn’t used to having anyone else around, when she saw Doc stomping his way towards him.
“I thought it would be better if I came to get you. He hasn’t woken in the best of moods.” There was a thread of friendliness in Archer’s voice. But she got a feeling her comments had put them back firmly into the polite acquaintance category.
“You mean he sometimes wakes in a good mood?”
“Better than this. Be ready for some scolding.”
She braced herself as Doc approached. “What’s taking so long? Did she tell you where she’s been?”
“She has not. She pointed out that she doesn’t owe us anything. We are, after all, strangers who
have imposed on her.”
She winced at the cold properness in Archer’s voice. Yeah. She’d made a wrong move there. Damn it.
“Look, I’m sorry. I should have left a note. I’m not used to anyone being around. I just went to check on the creek.”
“You drove your crappy truck out alone after a storm, with what looks like another bad front coming in and you didn’t think you should let someone know? You didn’t even have your phone with you! What if something happened? What if you’d had an accident? Hurt yourself?”
She blinked as Doc raged at her. Scolding, indeed. To her shock and embarrassment, tears started to well in her eyes.
“Isaac! She doesn’t owe us any explanations.” Archer turned on his brother with a scowl.
“We didn’t know where she was! She was supposed to stay in her bed and sleep in. She barely got any sleep, then she snuck out, drove off in this heap of junk without a phone. What am I supposed to do? Ask her to kindly leave us a note next time?”
“That’s better than yelling at her!”
“I didn’t yell. I never raised my voice. And she deserves more than a scolding. She needs a damn good spanking. Should have tied her up, then I’d know she was where I put her.”
A sob escaped and they both turned to look at her shocked.
“She’s crying,” Doc said in a horrified voice.
“No wonder! You’re not her Dom. You’re her houseguest. You’re scaring her.”
He wasn’t scaring her. He was reminding her of what she’d lost. What she missed.
Having someone who gave a shit about her.
“Love, don’t cry. I’ll keep the big, mean grouch away from you. Come inside, I have coffee on,” Archer coaxed. All the winter in his voice had thawed.
“It…it’s not that.” She wiped at her eyes. But she did take Archer’s hand as he held it out to her. She climbed down from her truck and let Archer lead her inside, his hand firmly wrapped around hers. She’d always loved holding Dave’s hand. It had made her feel safe. It also brought out her Little side.
She took a deep breath, pushing that part of herself back. That was the last thing she needed right now. She could just imagine their reactions.
Actually, maybe she couldn’t imagine it. What had Archer said to Isaac?
You’re not her Dom.
“You’re freezing, Caley,” Archer commented. He rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand, sending a curious tingling through her body. Shoot. What was that?
She hadn’t been attracted to anyone since Dave died. And now, she’d reacted to both Doc and Archer. Mind you, it wasn’t like she’d really been around any other men in the last two years. Was it just because she was lonely?
Well, the fact that they’re super hot doesn’t hurt.
“She forgot her jacket. Again.”
Actually, she hadn’t forgotten it this time, she just hadn’t wanted to take the time to grab it and risk waking Doc up.
They stepped inside and the scent of coffee filled the cabin. “Ooh, coffee.”
“I made some, hope you don’t mind,” Archer said.
“Of course not. You can help yourself to anything. Sorry, I know I’ve been a terrible hostess.”
Archer let go of her hand and she immediately felt the loss. But it wasn’t like she could chase after him, clinging to his hand like a toddler in need of reassurance.
House guests. Nothing more.
Doc was behind her, she could feel his presence, but he was silent. She gave him a quick glance over her shoulder. He was frowning down at her. “Didn’t mean to make you cry.”
“You said I needed a spanking. You don’t think that would make me cry?”
“Well, it sure wasn’t going to be one for pleasure. So yeah, it would. Doesn’t mean I like making you cry. Like it less when I don’t know the reason.”
“How about because you were being a jerk?” Archer snapped from the kitchen where he was pouring out coffee into three mugs. He also poured a glass of water and handed it to her. “Drink that first.”
“It wasn’t—”
“You’re telling me that you were okay with waking up and finding her gone?” Doc interrupted her. “That you weren’t worried when we found her phone was sitting on the kitchen table? That you weren’t concerned when she didn’t come back for an hour?”
“Course I was worried. But that doesn’t mean you’ve got the right to go all Dom on her.”
She looked up at Doc. “You’re a dominant?”
He turned from scowling at Archer to her. He blinked, almost as though he’d forgotten she was there. That was flattering as hell.
“Yeah. And you’re a sub.”
“You can’t just come out with it like that, Isaac!”
“Why not? Am I supposed to beat around the bush? Make innuendos to see if she picks up on them? Go slowly, slowly.”
“Do you really think she knows what she is?” Archer asked.
“Yep, I do. Which means things will go worse for her considering I told her not to show her face out of her bedroom before ten.”
She narrowed her gaze at Doc. If she let him, she knew he’d run roughshod over her. She might be a bit awkward and rusty when it came to socializing, but she wasn’t a pushover.
“You’re not my Dom. You can’t give me rules. And you can’t punish me when I break them.”
“I owe you ten, brother,” Archer commented.
“Ten?” she asked.
“Archie didn’t think that you knew what you are.” Doc gave her a firm look. “And I might not be your Dom, but that doesn’t mean that I’m going to let you run around endangering yourself. What the hell are you even doing here on your own? You should have someone watching over you, making certain that you’re safe and healthy.”
She used to have that.
“Do you take an interest in all strangers’ lives?”
“No. Can’t remember the last time I really took an interest in someone else’s life who wasn’t under my care.”
“Under your care?”
“I’m a doctor on a ranch. Everyone there is under my medical care.”
Oh right. They way he’d said it, it had sounded like he had a harem of submissives, following his every bidding.
And that hadn’t been jealousy she’d felt at the thought. Really, it hadn’t.
“But then I found myself in the middle of a storm, staying in a cabin with a sub who is clearly not taking care of herself properly.”
“I’m not a child. I can take care of myself just fine.”
Doc made a noise of disagreement. Urgh, he was such a jerk. She wanted to…wanted to… strangle him! Kick him!
Kiss him.
Shoot. Where had that thought come from? What was wrong with her? There were so many emotions running through her. Anger. Arousal.
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt so alive. And she wasn’t sure she liked it.
“I have work to do.” She turned towards her office. She needed to get away from them for a while. She needed to breathe.
“I don’t think so,” Doc stated, moving in front of her.
“Out of my way.”
“Nope.”
“Issy,” Archer warned.
“Issy?” she asked Doc, who grimaced.
“Childhood nickname and don’t try to distract me. You’re not going to work. You worked well into the night. You’re going to sit your butt down and explain to me what you were thinking by sneaking off like that. Then you’re going to eat whatever I make us for breakfast and drink your coffee.”
“And if I don’t?”
“Then I’m gonna have to get strict with you.”
“You. Have. No. Right.” She scowled at Doc.
“Why’d you get upset before?” Archer asked suddenly. He was leaning back against the kitchen counter, studying her intently.
“What do you mean?” She walked towards the table and picked up her coffee. She grabbed her creamer from the fridge, dumping in a g
enerous amount. Seemed she was going to need a pick-me-up to deal with these guys.
“When you got upset out in the truck, I thought it was because Issy was being his usual overbearing self. But you’re not intimidated by him at all, are you?”
Doc made a scoffing noise.
“I find him intimidating,” she defended.
“Uh-uh, love, no lying,” Archer said in a low voice. “My dominant side might be less obvious than my brother’s but that doesn’t mean I will stand for being lied to. And I think Issy might be right, you need a keeper. How long have you known you were a sub? Have you ever had a full-time Dom? Why’d you get upset earlier?”
Her gaze drifted away from his. The sternness in his voice sent a shiver up her spine.
“It wasn’t because you were upset at Issy being so pushy, was it? Was it because you missed that? That you want someone to take charge? That it was nice to have someone care where you were and what you were doing and hold you accountable for misbehaving.”
“Goddamn it, how did I forget you’re a therapist?”
“This has nothing to do with me being a therapist and everything to do with me being a man and a Dom.”
She glanced at Doc then back at Archer. “You’re a Dom too?”
“Yep.”
She crossed her arms over her chest and stepped away, frowning at them both.
“I’m just doing a favor for Murray, that’s all. You have no business trying to tell me what to do or scolding me if I don’t do what either of you say. In case you’ve forgotten we met yesterday. You’re both being overbearing and rude. If you’ll excuse me, I have deadlines to meet.”
She turned and stormed into her office. And she wasn’t sad that no one followed her. Really, she wasn’t.
“Think we might have mishandled that one.” Isaac looked over at the closed office door with a frown.
Archer took a sip of coffee. He felt a strange sense of satisfaction when he noticed she’d taken the coffee he’d made for her with him. When was the last time he’d done something as simple as make coffee for someone? Everywhere he went, there was someone looking after him.
Even when he went to the club, he was served by a sub. And even though he always gave back, he was nothing if not generous with orgasms, they were never his to take care of beyond a bit of aftercare.
Heal Me, Daddy Page 6