by Lucy Lambert
It felt like I’d stepped through the TV screen into some paranormal TV show or something. The first guy I like in years is an actual, honest to God werewolf. And the second turns out to be from some sort of monster hunting dynasty.
That thought caught me up. Did I really like Vick? I tried to put it down to hormones and the whole getting saved from Eric thing, but rationalizing my feelings like that didn’t make them go away.
“No, no… This is my, uh, initiation, I guess you could call it. You graduate high school. I graduate into the family after I pass my exam.”
The way he stressed that last word brought all my attention to him. I studied his face. Did he mean what I think he meant?
He gave an almost imperceptible nod.
“So… your final test is killing a monster all by yourself? You have to kill Adam?”
“I was. I’ve been watching him a while now, trying to figure out the best time. Then you and he… Well, I don’t really know what’s going on there. I decided to give it a bit more time. But now… but now!” he said, slamming his fists down onto the island hard enough to shake it.
I jumped back, my heart slamming.
“Now he’s gone and killed someone. And I could have stopped it, if only I’d had the balls to do something sooner.”
The veins in his neck stood out, and his shoulders heaved as he took long, gulping breaths. Was this what I looked like when I blamed myself for this whole thing?
“It’s okay, Vick. He knows what he’s done. Do you know where he might have put the body? Jenn’s body?”
Vick shook his head, running his hands through his hair.
“No. I’ve never actually seen him outside as the wolf. Seems whatever system he has going works… usually.”
He started pacing up and down the kitchen, rubbing at his chin and staring at the shiny linoleum floor.
I just wanted to get out of there, now. It took all that time just to learn that he had no clue where I should start looking. Also, he looked about ready to start blowing steam out of his ears.
It was back to square one. A ball of dread formed in my stomach as I thought of confronting Adam again. He was so torn up about all this. But I had to put him through it again, until we found her. Then… Well, then I would make sure he was locked up in that room of his every time that change happened.
“Where are you going?” Vick said.
“I have to get to class.”
“Wait… You have to promise me you’ll stay away from him now.”
I took my hand off the kitchen door and let it flop back and forth in front of me.
“I can’t. I have to find her, and he’s my best shot. Besides, someone has to make sure he doesn’t hurt anyone. I can do that. Now, I have to go.”
“Stop!” Vick said, getting right in front of me. He really was a built guy, and quite imposing. I kept thinking he should be on the football team.
“It’s obvious you care for him. And you know what? He actually sounds like an okay guy. But he’s got that thing inside him. Yeah, he seems able to control it or lock himself up most of the time. But he’s already lost it and killed one person. What if it happens again, Stephanie?” he asked, putting his hands on my shoulders, “What if next time it’s you?”
For a moment, we just looked into each other’s eyes. I could see the worry in his as they examined me. It was touching that someone could feel that way about it, and it actually was a little strange to be on the receiving end. Was this how my mom felt for that whole year every time I looked at her?
But I’d helped my mom. And I could help Adam, too. Still, what Vick said struck a chord. I had so many mixed feelings about Adam. On one hand, I kept thinking about our kiss. That confirmed that he liked me back. On the other… Jenn’s face kept surfacing in my thoughts. For a moment, her bloodless features were replaced with mine and I shivered.
“Let me by,” I said, giving his hands pointed looks.
Vick nodded and released me. Before he stepped aside, though, it seemed he had one last thing to say.
“Look, at least take my cell number. If anything happens, I promise I’ll answer it right away. No matter what.”
“Fine,” I said, digging my phone out of my pocket and handing it to him. A few seconds later, he gave it back with his number programmed in.
I was just about to slip through the kitchen door when he touched my shoulder.
“And Stephanie? Don’t tell him about me, okay?”
I didn’t give him an answer. Instead, I walked out of that frat house and tried to get everything set for my next class.
Chapter 29
Every night that week, Adam turned. I knew because I spent each of those nights at his house. Each evening, after class he would come and pick me up from my dorm in that BMW.
It seemed each day that went by without finding Jenn added another ton or two to the weight sitting on his shoulders.
My coursework suffered, of course. It was all I could do to attend class and try to sit there with glassy eyes, shaking myself from my stupor every few moments to try and scratch something down on my notepad.
I knew my grades would start slipping soon. There were end of term essays due. I hadn’t even finished reading Jane Eyre yet, let alone written down any sort of thesis or outline for the ten page paper I had to turn in.
All that stuff seemed to pale in importance when I sat across from Adam in his kitchen. I still hadn’t seen any of the staff he’d talked about, but I assume they’d come and gone several times. The fridge was always stocked, and the whole place was spotless and smelling of cleaners.
Though I had to admit it was almost good to feel like someone depended on me again. It was like old times back in Pasadena. Except now I wasn’t running to the pharmacy to hand over a bunch of rolled pennies for a prescription.
“I thought that werewolves were only supposed to transform during full moons?” I said one day, twirling my fork in the spaghetti on my plate. It was just plain pasta and plain red sauce, nothing fancy.
The red sauce was a mistake, I thought. Adam could hardly look at it.
“If only,” Adam said, “The full moon can cause it. But strong emotions are also a trigger. That’s why I try to stay away from most people, usually. People make you feel things. If I don’t hang around with many, I don’t have to feel that way. See?”
I did. It sounded like such an empty, unfulfilled life. Yeah, it seemed somehow easier. With fewer people around you, there’d be fewer arguments and disagreements, not so many disappointments, or any of those other negative things. But the opposite was true as well.
It would be simply existing, rather than living. And that was a feeling I was familiar with.
After getting a suitably large amount of spaghetti onto my fork, I shoveled it into my mouth.
My heart went out to him. There was so much potential in there, but he was cursed for something that happened so many years before he was even born. Why should he suffer for something a family member of his did so long ago? It just didn’t seem fair.
I was so lost in thought that when he dropped his fork onto his plate, the sharp noise of it nearly made me topple backwards.
Adam lurched from his chair, pulling at that torn jacket. I’d told him to get rid of it, but he just wouldn’t. He said it reminded him of what he’d done.
“It’s happening…” he said, his face already twisting with pain.
Sunlight still came in through the windows. It was so early for this. Still, I jumped out of my chair and made my way around to him. I’d become somewhat accustomed to his transformation now. And this worried me.
It was getting faster, every time. I wrapped his arm around my shoulder even as waves of fear washed through me. There was already a deep rumble in his throat, and if he opened his clenched eyes I knew they’d be a different color.
I almost dropped him down the stairs to the basement as we made our way down.
I yelped as his fingernails turned to claws and push
ed into the flesh of my shoulder.
“Steph… I’m so sorry, Steph…” he groaned, not even sounding like himself anymore.
“It’s okay, you’re going to be fine. It’s all going to be fine,” I said through my teeth, unsure if I even believed myself anymore.
He practically jumped into the scarred room with the big door. The first few nights, I’d sat in front of it, listening to his tortured noises as he became the wolf. Tonight, they receded behind me as I walked back up the stairs and to the kitchen.
There, I pulled out my phone and put it down by my now cold plate of spaghetti. I kept thinking about what Vick had said, right before I left him in the frat house.
He’d said, “What if next time it’s you?”
I thought about that, turning it over in my mind, my body curiously cold. It still hadn’t snowed outside yet, but the chill was a bitter one. I always wore a long-sleeved sweater and full jeans each day.
What if tomorrow he transformed before I got him through the door? Then it really would be me. What if for some reason I wasn’t around, and it happened to him and got outside?
Then whoever died because of it… their blood would be on both our hands, then. I wasn’t certain Adam could take another murder.
And we still hadn’t found Jenn’s body.
I brought up Facebook and looked at her profile. There were messages on her wall from family and friends, imploring her to come back, to let everyone know she was okay.
Those wrenched at my heart, because I knew she wasn’t okay. That she’d never respond to any of them ever again. I pulled up her profile picture.
Downstairs, the wolf howled. No matter how many times I heard that sound, I never got used to it. It pierced right through the floorboards and the walls, went into my body and tickled at the base of my spine.
I shut my eyes, waiting for him to finish. It went on far too long. It was a good thing he didn’t really have any close neighbors. Anyone who heard it would be calling the cops right away.
I asked myself why I was still doing all this. Why was I helping him at all? Vick watched us, I knew. He let me see him a couple times.
Each instance, our eyes had met. It was a look that said, “Why are you doing this? Leave him alone, and I’ll take care of it.”
Maybe it was that it all seemed so hopeless. There was no cure for lycanthropy, as far as Adam and I could find out. He was doomed to spend his life like this.
It was a similar feeling to when I first found out about mom’s cancer. The doctors had all rated her chance for survival quite low, especially since our insurance made it clear that they wouldn’t be covering any of the new and experimental procedures and drugs.
It had all been hopeless, then, too. But then that pharmaceutical company came along, our lifeboat on that stormy sea. Every time I talked to mom on the phone, she sounded a little better, a little stronger.
I guess I was holding out for a similar raft to find Adam and me out there as the waves tossed up about. Right now, I’d settle for some life jackets, or even just a couple pairs of those little arm floaters that little kids liked so much.
Just any sign of hope would do.
My bed was a big, overstuffed black couch in a small study down the hall from the kitchen. Adam had offered me a room upstairs, but it felt so lonely up there, so quiet.
I fluffed my pillow and stared up at the ceiling, hoping to wake up to that glimmer of hope we both needed so badly.
I had a terrible nightmare. I remember being on campus. It was late at night. A few sheer clouds ghosted past a full moon overhead. It was the only light. Not a single building, or window in any of those buildings, were lit.
And something watched me. Something with hungry eyes and a terrible desire. I ran, my bare feet pounding on the cold asphalt. I wanted so badly to look back, but I knew if I did I would see it right there on my heels, needing only to stretch out its great arms to grab me up and…
“Steph? Hey, wake up.�
A hand gently squeezed my shoulder. I knew that voice. I used it to pull myself out of that nightmare, away from those grasping claws.
I opened my eyes to see Adam kneeling beside me, concern furrowing his brow. His bright eyes examined me. He’d thrown on a black housecoat, the belt not tied tightly, letting me see a large slice of his chest. A shaft of sunlight pushed in through a crack in the drapes, so I knew it had to be morning.
“Are you okay?� he said, brushing some hair from my face.
I looked down and saw how I’d kicked my blanket onto the floor. “Yeah, I am now, I guess. Bad dream…�
Sitting up, I yawned, squeezing my eyes shut as I stretched my arms up over my head. The couch was a bit too giving, and a deep soreness emanated from the small of my back.
Then the face of the beast flashed against my eyelids. “Oh!� I said, rocking back, my heart trying to shoot up out of my throat.
Instantly, Adam sat on the couch beside me, holding me. I leaned my body into his, welcoming the simple comfort and strength I felt there.
“Don’t worry, it was just a dream…� Adam said. He hesitated for a moment, then kissed the top of my head.
I wished it was a dream. Monsters like that should exist only in dreams and bad movies.
“How about I get breakfast started?� Adam said, trying to disentangle himself from me.
“No! Don’t go, not yet, please…� I said, grabbing the sleeve of his housecoat and pulling at it. His belt came undone, leaving a long sliver of his naked body exposed.
He sat back down, doing his best to pull the robe shut. That dream was too fresh in my mind, as well as all the other horrors visited on me those past few days. I just wanted to get away from it all, just for a bit.
I told myself that was why I pulled him close for a kiss. His eyes widened in shock for a moment, his lips tense for a second, but then he relaxed and returned my affection.
His lips were hot and soft against mine, and his hands felt good clasped at the small of my back. I don’t know who opened their mouth first, but our tongues met. The kiss got intense, and his hands grew curious, exploring my body.
Heat infused me, and the chill of the nightmare disappeared. Yes, this was good. So good.
And from there, things spiraled further out of control as the desires of our young bodies took control of the situation. He pulled the old t-shirt I slept in over my head, his fingers eager to squeeze and knead my breasts.
My fingers ran down his stomach and wrapped around his already hard length. He gasped at the touch, then sucked my bottom lip into his mouth and bit down lightly on it.
I was already wet for him when his fingers pushed between my thighs and rubbed up and down my panties. The pressure of his touch had me panting and groaning, arching my head back so that he could kiss my neck. He hadn’t shaved yet, so his stubble prickled at my soft flesh. I kind of liked it.
Adam took a moment to fully shrug out of his robe, and to pull my panties off. He lay beside me, his fingers parting my lower lips, getting all slicked with my juices, while I stroked him.
My body urged me to roll onto my side a little and let him slip between my legs, deep into my aching sex. The desire hurt, I wanted to feel him naked inside me so badly, nothing but our flesh touching.
But somewhere I found the strength to tell him to go get something before we went any further. He came back with another blue-wrapped condom and started tearing it open before I took it from.
“Hey…� he said. He shut up when I pulled the condom out and rolled it down his shaft myself, rubbing his hardness the whole time.
“I need you now,� I told him, every word of it true. It was strange, in many ways he was the cause of my nightmare, the cause of my recent pain. But he was also the only thing that could hold it at bay. I didn’t care what Vick said, or how dangerous Adam might truly be.
At that moment, I needed only to be with him.
So he came back onto the couch, supporting himself over me on his hands, all the muscles in his arms standing out. I spread my legs apart for him.
This time lacked the intensity of our lust in the kitchen that night, but it didn’t need it. He guided himself against me. I wrapped my legs around his back and urged him forward, both of us sucking in a breath as he sank into me.
Our groans continued as he rhythmically slipped back and then thrust into me, my legs pulling him in a little harder than he wanted.
We kissed again, my fingernails lightly scratching at his broad shoulder blades. Each time he entered me, my walls tightened around him a little when I thought of how nice he felt in there. How big and hard and hot.
His rhythm got faster as his desire got hotter. Every thrust added to the tight, hot ball low in my stomach, bringing me closer and closer. What started out nice and slow, loving even, quickly spiraled into our bodies slapping together, the couch squealing against the floor as it shifted beneath the force of his efforts.
It really hit home when his face began to contort, almost as though he was in pain. At first, I thought he was about to transform again. Then, feeling him get harder inside me, I knew what was about to happen.
“Come on, Adam. That’s it, give it to me. I want it. I want it all…� I said, almost shocking myself. I’d never really considered myself a dirty talker. But it was true. I wanted him to reach his climax. My thoughts went back to our encounter in the kitchen, and the way it felt when he finally went over the edge.
Nibbling on his earlobe did it. He arched his back up, his toes scrabbling at the cushion to push himself as deeply into my as he could.
When his shaft jerked inside me, I climaxed.
“Adam!� I said, feeling my walls bear down on him uncontrollably, trying to keep him trapped deep inside as his seed spurted from him.
His body tensed with each jerk of his member, and an expression almost like pain twisted his face. It was the sexiest, most arousing thing I’d ever seen.
It’s me, I’m doing that to him! I kept thinking.