For Sale Or Swap

by Alyssa Brugman

  As they were pulling out of the driveway Kim and her mother were driving in the other way. The girls waved to each other from inside the cars. Shelby couldn't help grinning. She was part of a gang now.

  Hayley seemed to have perked up a little bit. As they drove along she turned up the CD player and they all sang together. Mrs Crook sang along too. Shelby thought it would be cool to have a mum who knew the words to the latest songs and didn't just listen to fuddy-duddy talkback radio.

  Shelby watched out the window as they drove into the showgrounds. She could see the skeletal curve of the Ferris wheel above the tents and caravans. Dodgem cars were lined up in a tidy row along one side of their rubber arena, and the carriages of the Tilt-a-Whirl and Rock-and-Roll stood still and empty. Shelby watched as a young boy stocked the back wall of a caravan with plush toys, colourful tinsel wigs and other trinkets. In front of him, a row of clown faces stared out with their mouths open.

  Beside the clowns was an empty patch of grass. A man was staking pickets into the ground with a large mallet, swinging it rhythmically behind his back and then over his head. Shelby could hear the heavy clink sound as the head of the mallet connected with the rounded top of the picket. Behind him she could see a rusty cattle truck. Pete's Pony Rides was written along the side in faded red paint.

  On the other side of the grounds there were already several trucks and floats lined up in raggle-taggle rows. Mrs Crook sought out a little patch of ground that they could call home for the day and stopped, pulling up the handbrake.

  'Here we go, girls,' she said, turning around to look at Erin and Shelby in the back.

  'Thanks for driving us,' Shelby said.

  'Pleasure, treasure,' she replied.

  They tied the horses to rings along the float's side and then gave them another brush down, a coat of black polish on their hooves and a rub of baby oil to their faces. Mrs Crook tidied up a few of the rosettes that had come loose along the way.

  The air was quiet and still except for the steady hum of all the carnival caravan generators. Suddenly the tooting, nasal sound of an organ started up and the Ferris wheel rolled around in a slow, lazy loop. Then the music cut out and the Ferris Wheel stopped, its metal carriages swaying.

  'Thank heavens for that,' said Mrs Crook, opening the back of the four-wheel drive to give the equipment one last rub-down ready for the first class.

  The girls wandered across the centre ring of the showground to find the Steward's stand to collect a program for the day and buy tickets.

  Hayley looked over the program thoroughly, frowning. She shook her head.

  'What is it?' asked Erin.

  'The Pony and Galloway classes are on at the same time. That's OK in the led class, because Mum can take Echo, but she can't take him under saddle. We should have left him at home if he's only going to go in led.'

  Shelby was glad that they'd brought him along. At least she could pretend to have a horse.

  Back at the float they all had sandwiches for breakfast washed down with fruit cordial. Hayley complained that she wanted chips, but Shelby was enjoying squishing the fresh bread down with her fingers.

  Mrs Crook examined the program and flung it over her shoulder into the back of the car. 'This is not good for us, girls,' she commented.

  A few more floats and trucks rumbled down the gravel driveway. Hayley recognised Monica's float, and also waved to a few other girls who Shelby had never seen before.

  After they had finished eating, Mrs Crook reached into the back of the four-wheel drive for Hayley's coat bag. She unzipped it. 'Blue or brown today, Hales?'

  Hayley tilted her head to the side. 'Brown. The blue one is getting a bit tight across the shoulders.'

  Mrs Crook held up the blue material and rubbed it in her hands. 'I think we've already let it out as much as it's going to go. We'll have to get you another one.'

  Shelby watched for a response from Hayley. There was none. She simply threaded her arms through the brown jacket and shrugged it into place. If Shelby's mother said she could have a new show jacket she'd jump around for a whole day. Hayley hardly even noticed.

  It was nine o'clock and Mrs Crook, Hayley and Erin led their horses into the ring. Shelby walked with them as far as the fence line, and then she leaned against it to watch.

  There was a sharp echoing click as the showground loudspeakers switched on. A few of the horses jumped at the sound, but they soon settled down. On the other side of the ground the Ferris wheel music started again and this time it stayed on. The Tilt-a-Whirl and Rock-and-Roll started up too, each with their own loud music blaring out. Shelby saw a few of the early show-goers walking along the aisles between the marquees and caravans, clutching show bags and fairy floss.

  She looked back at the ring and saw that all three of the horses had been called in to the centre. Erin gave her a big wave, throwing her hands in the air and startling the horse next to Bandit. Shelby could see Erin apologising to the girl and she grinned. It was just like Erin to do something stupid with the very best of intentions.

  Shelby turned her attention back to the sideshow. Pete had unloaded his ponies and they milled around with their heads down in a makeshift yard – all wearing oversized stock saddles, so big that they almost wrapped around their bellies and met at the bottom.

  Most of them were Shetlands, but there were paint ponies amongst them. Shelby's heart started to race as she made out the patchwork shapes of one after the other. Could it be Blue? She couldn't tell from this distance. This is exactly the sort of place she imagined he would end up – tied up and hobbled, giving ride after boring ride to beginners, and then shoved back on some rusty old truck for a long, windy trip back to a loveless home.

  Shelby watched as a small girl tugged at her mother's sleeve and pointed to the ponies. The mother reached into her pocket and pulled out some coins. The little girl skipped over to the rope barrier and handed the money to the man.

  Shelby shuddered to think that this was where her interest in riding had begun. It was at a school fete four years ago. She'd ridden a pony just like these ones – small, shaggy and broken – and when the ride was over she begged her mother to let her go again. After three rides her mother stood with her while she patted the ponies for the next hour.

  Can I have a pony, Mum?

  No, Shel. You can have a goldfish or a budgie. Would you like that?

  Shelby watched the man pull a tiny black Shetland out of the little yard and lift the girl onto it by her underarms. He led the pony around the front of the barrier. The girl waved to her mother. Then they disappeared from view behind the clown caravan.

  Back in the ring the judge was looping prize ribbons around the horses' necks. Ditto and Echo had won their classes, while Bandit had come third in the led Galloway class.

  As they headed back, Shelby ran her eyes over Pete's ponies again. There were two paints that were tall enough to be Blue, but they were tucked in behind the others and she couldn't see their faces or markings from where she was standing. She decided to go and investigate later.

  Erin, Hayley and Mrs Crook had reached her by this stage. Erin was grinning and giggling. 'I got a ribbon!' she said, starting to walk back to the float. 'At least I won't go home empty-handed. There's nothing worse than that, is there?' She tapped Hayley on the forearm. 'Of course, you wouldn't know what that's like, but Shelby does.'

  'Erin!' admonished Mrs Crook.

  'What?' she protested. Shelby could see in her face that Erin was genuinely mystified.

  'What's up next?' asked Hayley.

  'Ridden ponies and Galloways,' replied Mrs Crook. 'We'd better go back and get those saddles on, girls. You can ride Ditto today, Hales. He needs the points.'

  'Why don't you get Shelby to ride Echo?' suggested Erin.

  Mrs Crook and Hayley looked at each other and back at Shelby.

  Shelby blushed. 'No, it's OK. It doesn't matter.'

  'Could you?' asked Hayley.

  'I . . . I don't know. I
've never ridden him before.'

  'Would you mind having a go?' asked Mrs Crook. 'It seems a shame to bring him all this way.'

  Shelby felt a rush of excitement through her belly. 'I could try.'

  'Well, Shel, we've got a better chance of him winning with you on him than if he's tied up to the float all day. Now, let's get this gear on you.'

  Shelby stood still while Mrs Crook dressed her in the blue jacket and tied back her hair. Hayley's spare helmet was a bit loose, and flopped down over Shelby's eyebrows, but she would have to make do.

  'Your boots are a mess,' said Mrs Crook. 'Don't you ever polish them?'

  'I do!' said Shelby.

  'You do, my eye,' grumbled Mrs Crook. She looked at her watch. 'Shelby, this is Wanada Park Echo. Now on you hop.' She gave Shelby a boost. 'You've got about two minutes to get to know each other.'

  Shelby looked down at the tangle of double reins. 'I've never used these before,' she said. Hayley showed her how to hold them properly.

  With her legs, she pushed Echo forward and he lurched away to the side underneath her. Shelby felt a prickle of sweat across her lip.

  'He's got a bit of go in him, so be gentle,' advised Hayley.

  Shelby's heart was hammering in her chest as she followed the other girls towards the ring. Mrs Crook walked beside her, holding Echo's rein steady. The stirrup was slippery and slid out from under Shelby's boot. She thrust her foot in it, and accidentally kicked Echo in the belly. He danced away to the side and Shelby felt her seat slipping on the smooth saddle. 'Steady,' she said, jerking the reins.

  Mrs Crook and Hayley exchanged a glance.

  'Maybe you should ride him in the practice arena first?' Hayley suggested.

  Mrs Crook shook her head. 'There's no time.'

  They were at the fence now. Hayley and Erin turned their horses away towards the Galloway ring. Shelby pushed Echo in the direction of the other ponies. Mrs Crook waited at the gate, frowning and rubbing her hands together.

  'It's just you and me now, matey,' Shelby said.

  The first part wasn't so hard. There were about twenty ponies in the ring and it was just a matter of following what they were doing. Her stirrup slipped again, but it was the one on the outside and she managed to slide her foot back into it before they changed to the other side. The canter was a bit hairy. Echo surged forward around the outside, much faster than the other horses, but Shelby leaned back in the saddle and eventually he slowed down and she relaxed into it. After a few laps she was called into the ring behind two other ponies. They stood and waited for the judge to make another selection before the rest of the ponies were dismissed.

  Shelby watched the first two complete their workout. The first one struck off on the wrong leg in the canter. The second one wouldn't rein back, and tossed its head.

  Then it was Shelby's turn. She tried to concentrate on what the judge was saying, but her mind was all in a whirl. She could feel her heartbeat in the side of her neck. Echo was champing at his bit and stamping his feet.

  'Got it?' the judge asked. Shelby didn't, but she nodded anyway.

  She started off in a trot. That was easy enough. She quickly looked down to check she was rising on the right beat. Then she sat back, squeezed her legs and Echo started to canter. She kept a tight hold on the reins and managed to keep him from running off like he did before. Echo was doing well. She came around the last turn and stopped. She had no idea what Hayley's aid for back might be.

  'Do you know back?' she whispered to him.

  Echo took one step backwards. 'Back,' said Shelby again, experimenting. Echo took another step backwards.

  'Back, back, back,' she said. Echo took the corresponding steps.

  'Very good,' she said, smiling. She loosened her grip on the reins and let him walk around the other ponies and into her place in the line.

  It was over. She'd done her best. While she waited for the other pony to complete its workout she thought over her own and tried to remember if she had done anything wrong. She looked over at the fence line to where Mrs Crook was waiting. Mrs Crook held two thumbs in the air, and then kissed her fingers – bellissimo.

  The other pony had finished now and the judge rearranged them in the line. She put Shelby on the right, then the last pony and then the other two. She asked Shelby to step forward. She watched in delight as the judge wrapped a blue ribbon around Echo's neck.

  'Congratulations,' she said, shaking Shelby's hand.

  'Thank you so much,' Shelby gushed. She turned to watch as the judge put the red and yellow ribbons on the other girls' horses and then congratulated them too.

  So this is what it feels like to be a winner, she thought, patting Echo on the neck.

  'Woo hoo, look at you,' said Mrs Crook as she headed over toward the fence. 'Fantastic.'

  'Thanks,' said Shelby, grinning.

  'We should bring you along more often.'

  Shelby laughed.

  'No, I'm serious,' said Mrs Crook. 'The programs are only going to get worse for us when Scamp comes back. It would be handy to have an understudy – if you're interested.'

  'That would be unreal!' said Shelby.

  'Now, hurry up and give me that ribbon. Your age class is up next.'

  'Really?' Shelby could understand why they wanted her to ride the horse in the pony class, where it was Echo being judged, but there was no need for her to enter the rider class.

  'Why not? Off you go,' Mrs Crook said.

  Hayley and Erin rushed over to hand Mrs Crook their blue and red ribbons and then they all rode off together back into the ring. This time Shelby was called in again, last after Hayley, Erin and another girl that she didn't know. In this ring they were much closer to the sideshow and Shelby could hear the excited screaming from the rides.

  Hayley completed a perfect workout. Erin's was correct, although she did flop around a bit in the saddle. The other girl was good as well, but Shelby thought she leaned too far forward and her hands were low, as if she was holding the horse's head in. Next it was Shelby's turn. She was more relaxed now and able to listen to what the judge asked her to do.

  She walked up the centre line and then trotted off in a circle to the right, then back to the middle again and off to the left. Things were going well until it was time to canter to the left. Shelby looked up and a sight from the sideshow caught her eye.

  At Pete's Pony Rides there was a girl on a paint horse. Shelby could only see the back half as it strode away behind the clown caravan. Just as it disappeared from view the little paint horse swished a particularly long, thick tail – a tail so long that it dragged on the ground.

  27 A Mental Blank

  Shelby had used the expression 'mental blank' many times, but she had never really known what it felt like. There she was cantering around in a circle on a horse. Which horse exactly, she didn't know – nor why. The important thing seemed to be to get it over with as soon as possible so that she could see if what she saw really was what she thought she saw.

  She looked back at the others lined up in a row in the middle of the showground. The judge had one arm across her chest, resting her chin on her hand, and frowning.

  What on earth was she supposed to do next? She tried to think back to what the judge had said. Halt and back. No, that was the last time. She was coming around to the middle again. She slowed for two steps of trotting and struck off again on the other leg. She had to decide what she was going to do quickly, because she couldn't just keep riding around in circles. What was the workout? Shelby had no idea at all. She gave up. She slowed Echo down and then walked back on a loose rein. Who knows? Maybe she'd guessed right.

  'What happened?' mouthed Erin.

  So I got it wrong then.

  She shook her head at Erin. She looked towards Pete's Pony Rides, but she couldn't see the paint pony whose back half looked so much like Blue's.

  The judge awarded the prizes – first to Hayley, second to Erin and third to the other girl. Nothing for Shelby. They al
l congratulated each other and began to walk out of the ring. Shelby was in a hurry, but the judge stopped her.

  'I wanted to let you know that I called you in because of the horse.'

  'I beg your pardon?' asked Shelby.

  'This is a rider's class, but I called you in because of this little gelding.' The judge indicated towards Echo.

  'Oh,' said Shelby. She turned to go, but the judge stopped her again.

  'It wasn't that you got the workout wrong either. You can handle a horse, but your technique is actually quite sloppy. I'm telling you because you'd do better if you had instruction.'

  Under normal circumstances Shelby would have been devastated by a remark like that, but she just wanted to get away and find Blue.

  'Thanks,' said Shelby as she urged Echo out of the ring.

  Halfway across the showground, Hayley and Erin were waiting for her.

  'What happened, Shel? What did she say?' asked Hayley.

  'God, look at your face!' said Erin. 'Are you OK?'

  'I've have to go,' said Shelby. She slipped off Echo's back and handed the reins to Hayley.

  Mrs Crook was scooting around the edge of the showground towards the girls, her arms pumping up and down. 'What's going on?' she called out. 'What did the judge say?'

  Shelby turned and ran to the edge of the grounds, back towards the sideshow. Towards the long tail. Towards Blue.

  'Shelby!' Erin called from behind her.

  'Has she gone bananas?' Mrs Crook said, finally reaching the girls.

  Shelby kept running. There would be time to explain later.

  28 Pete's Pony Rides

  The boundary of the showground was ringed by a metal fence, waist high, and covered with boards of advertising. Shelby vaulted over it. Her boots landed with a thump on the small wooden bench on the far side. She ran up the shallow grassy incline.

  A few of the show-goers were sitting on the grass eating hot chips from yellow cardboard cups and battered hot dogs on sticks. They watched Shelby curiously as she ran past them, as though she were part of the entertainment.