by Erika Kelly
Had something happened?
“I’m fine. But he’s right, I have been distracted. I’ve been slacking off the past few weeks.” He listened for a minute, then let out a laugh she didn’t recognize. “You got that right. Being banned has a way of getting a man’s attention.”
Banned? Will had been banned?
“But don’t worry. I got my focus back.” He listened. “Yeah, you go. I’ll see you in a few days. Thanks, man.” He pitched his phone onto his mattress.
“Will?” She stepped into his room.
“Oh. Hey. Thought you’d be with your brother.”
“How’d you know he was here?”
“I saw the car out front when I got back from training.”
“You’ve been home all this time?” Why didn’t you come meet him?
He gave a curt nod.
“What’s this about you being banned?” She watched him carefully, as he stood there, a wall of muscle, locked down, and regarding her like she was some houseguest.
“Yeah, can you believe it? Damien unearthed an old photograph of my dad with the founder of Sprocket.”
“What—”
He held up a hand. “We’re taking care of it. My father was one of the original investors, but he sold out after two years. The management’s turned over several times since then. There’s no connection.”
“That’s insane.”
He moved around her—keeping his distance, like she had fleas. “I’m on it.”
“Will, you’re—”
“Where’s your brother?”
“Lachlan’s giving him a tour of the ranch.”
“Great. He’ll show him a good time.” He gave her the fakest, most insincere smile she’d ever seen. “Heard your good news.”
“You did?” This…this wasn’t her Will. This was the Will she’d met that first night, the one who followed advice from books and not his heart.
“Yeah. Got home right when he was telling you about the opportunity.” His smile looked like something he’d be forced to give with his balls in a vise. “Congratulations.”
On her twenty-sixth birthday, she’d opened an envelope with a tear sheet that had killed the dream she’d had since she was a little girl. That sense of the ground giving way beneath her feet? That stinging sensation in her limbs?
It’s happening all over again.
The man she’d fallen in love with was gone, replaced by the disciplined champion.
She understood. He’d been banned from the sport that should be erecting a statue in his honor. He needed Freefest more than ever. He needed to distance himself, so he could focus. I get that.
“When do you leave?” he asked.
“Will, I…” She lifted her arms and let them drop to her sides.
“Sounds like you’ll skip the final competition?” He reached for his laptop on the tall dresser. “Makes sense. No point in wasting time creating a menu for a Calamity restaurant when you’re starting a kitchen in New York.”
“Will, stop it. What’re you doing?”
“Well, right now I’m organizing my travel plans. I’m printing out the pictures of the course, making arrangements with Miss Kessler. Marcella will be back tomorrow, Fin and Callie the day after.”
“That’s good. But why are you talking to me like I’m some houseguest you’ve been courteously passing in the hallway?”
He set the laptop on his desk and flipped it open, powering it up. Staring at it, like he wished it would break into a jig or breathe fire, anything to create a distraction, he drew in a breath. “Because you’re leaving. And I’m…adjusting.”
“Can you please stop adjusting and just be with me? Just sit and talk to me?”
“No, Delilah. I’m not going to do that.”
“Why?”
“Because this isn’t easy for me.”
“It isn’t easy for me, either. Will, I love you.” It was like peeling away a layer of grime and seeing clearly for the very first time. “I love you so much. I—”
With a pained expression, he held up a hand. “Let’s not do this.”
She took in the pajama shorts he’d stripped off her last night and flung onto the chair, the mound of dirty laundry in the closet they hadn’t gotten around to washing because they’d spent every free moment they could together, and the snow globes she’d barely begun to discover. “You have to know how much this is tearing me apart. If my brother had offered me my franchise, I would’ve turned it down.” She hadn’t known that until this moment, but it was absolutely true. “But this is Dino Romano. He believes in me enough to let me run with my own vision for Da Nonna’s.”
“I know. And I know what that means to you. I’m genuinely happy for you. But, right now, you’re going to have to give me some time to…adjust.”
“I don’t want to do that. I want to talk to you. Because I love you, and I…”
“You what, Delilah? I don’t know what you want me to do with this information. You tell me you love me now, when you’re leaving? What is it you’re looking for? Do you want to have a dramatic scene where we confess our love for each other, reminisce on all the good times we’ve had, and have some long, drawn-out goodbye? Because I don’t want that.” He stalked towards her. “I want you to be happy, and there’s nothing that’ll make you happier than this amazing opportunity that’s dropped into your lap. So, go. Go and live your dream.”
She’d seen Will conflicted. Seen him angry, happy, and ecstatic. Defeated, sad, determined, and disgusted. She’d seen him filled with hope, and she’d watched him crash.
But she’d never seen him with a pain so intense it ravaged his features. “I don’t have to decide anything right now. I’ll be back for the final event, and we can talk then.”
“I won’t be here.”
“I’ll wait until you come back.” Only, saying those words out loud drove it all home. If she stayed in Calamity, she’d be doing a lot of waiting. Will would be off chasing Olympic gold, and she’d be checking her phone every few minutes, hoping they could make a long distance relationship work.
Her sister’s words flew up into her face like a swarm of gnats. You’ll have given everything up for nothing.
Delilah didn’t know what she’d do if she gave up the chance to run a franchise backed by Dino Romano, only to have Will’s feelings for her change with time and distance.
He snapped his laptop closed and tossed it onto the bed. “What I feel for you…I’ve never felt it before, and I’m pretty damn sure I’m never going to feel it again. So, I’m going to ask you one last time, and if you can’t give me the answer I need, then I want you to be kind enough to walk out that door without looking back.” He drew in a shaky breath. “If you brother showed up today and offered you the chance to run your own Da Nonna’s, just the way you want to do it, would you take it?”
Sorrow burned like a razor’s slash across her chest. Her soul literally felt like it was being ripped in half. She truly, deeply wanted to stay. But how did she pass up a chance to grow her family’s business, while doing what she loved?
If she didn’t win the competition, she’d get a sous chef job in town, while Will went off on his competition season. Was she willing to give up an executive chef job with Dino Romano to find out if their relationship would last?
Her muscles wouldn’t move. Her lungs wouldn’t pull in oxygen. Nothing felt right. She wanted to stay with him as much as she wanted to run with this new opportunity. But her indecision was killing the man she loved, and she couldn’t do that to him.
With her limbs barely functioning, she turned and walked out the door.
Asleep on her stomach, rump up in the air and face squished by the pillow, making her lips pucker, Ruby slept peacefully. Squawk’s big yellow legs stuck out because of the arm wrapped tightly around its middle.
Her bedroom smelled of raspberry jam and crayons, and images of their roughhousing earlier that evening echoed through him. With his back against the wall, Will stretched
out alongside her, feet dangling off the edge of her mattress. He had a palm on her back just to feel her steady breathing.
The only thing missing was Delilah to close the Ruby sandwich. He missed the electric connection, missed seeing her smiling face—that aren’t we the luckiest bastards in the whole damn world sense of togetherness. But she’d left with her brother yesterday morning, and his world had gone quiet and still. Colorless.
Thank God for Ruby.
Awareness hit like a shock of ice cold water. After he came back from Freefest, Ruby would be in Fin’s care. Over time, she’d bond with his brothers, Marcella, Lachlan, and Miss Kessler. She’d barely remember him.
Strange how what mattered—what gripped his heart and squeezed—wasn’t his career but his girls.
At least he saw a path back to skiing. If he won Freefest, the League might lift the ban against him. That would clear him to make the Olympic team. His attorney had set a lot in motion, and since he hadn’t done anything wrong, he suspected he’d be vindicated.
And that meant his life would go back to what it had been before he’d met Delilah and Ruby. Only, he had met them, and his life would never feel the same again. He’d liked plenty of people in his twenty-eight years but, other than his brothers, they’d all come and gone, everyone on his own path in life. He might’ve only known Delilah for five weeks, but she’d imprinted. On a cellular level, she’d become part of him.
He’d tried to turn the channel. That’s what I do best. But it hadn’t worked. Maybe when he got on the plane, got his head in competition-mode, started hanging out with his buddies, maybe being busy would edge out the space she’d taken.
He visualized the papers still in the printer, the passport he needed to get out of the safe, the wool socks he’d forgotten to pack. See? Once he had other things to focus on, he’d stop hurting.
Gently, he lifted his hand off Ruby’s back and hitched up on an elbow to take in her sleeping form. All that crazy hair and those bare baby toes…damn, she was adorable.
When he lifted all the way up, she blinked and sat up on her knees. “Stay wif me.”
How could he resist that sleepy voice and those questioning eyes?
But, of course, he had to. His plane left at four AM. He was leaving the country, for Christ’s sake. He still had to get that damn passport. He tested his knee—no pain. Good. “I have to go, Rubes. You sleep. Remember, when you wake up, Fin’s going to make you his famous sweet potato pancakes.”
“No, fanks.” Ruby shoved hair out of her eyes. “Go Wheel.”
His lungs compressed like sponges in big fists. “I’ll be home in a week.” She doesn’t even know what that means. “And you’re going to the lake with Miss Kessler.”
She leaned in and wrapped her arms around his neck.
Christ. He patted her hands, before prying them off. “Hey, look at me. I’m going to miss you, but I’m coming back.”
Her lower lip wobbled. “Go wif you.”
“No, Ruby. Not on this trip. But you’re going to have fun with Fin and Callie, Marcella and Miss Kessler. And then, before you know it, I’ll be back.”
He got off the bed. He didn’t want to crush her spirit. He didn’t want to hurt her. He didn’t want…
He didn’t want to leave her.
She got up on her feet, looking so fragile in her little cotton pajama set. “Go wif you, Wheel.”
His heart pounded furiously. “Sweetheart, I have to go to work. I have to get on a plane and work for a week. But I’ll be back after that.”
“Pease, Wheel?” She stomped her feet, clearly agitated. “Pease?”
“No, I…” Shit. Fuck. He’d drawn that line in the beginning for this very reason, knowing if she got too attached, she’d be destroyed when he left.
She lifted her hands, turning her palms upward and hunching her shoulders. “I dus wike you, Wheel. I dus do.”
Oh, Jesus. Oh, fucking hell. She was apologizing for being too needy. For wanting to be with him. Pain landed like a spike into the center of his heart.
It was the worst thing he could’ve done to her. He scooped her into his arms. “I like you, too Ruby.” He forced words through the hard knot in his throat. “You’re my best buddy, and I love spending time with you. I like it better than anything.”
Then why aren’t you staying with her?
Because I’m not her damn dad.
“But I have to go to work. And, this week, my work is far away. But when I’m done, I’ll come home and hang out with you again. Okay?”
But he knew from her expression she didn’t believe him.
And she was right. Her whole damn life was about to change, and she’d have to learn to trust someone else.
Chapter Forty
Standing inside the tent, ready for his final run, Will felt the biting cold in a way he never had before. Maybe he’d just been used to the cold or maybe he’d always been so focused on visualizing his tricks, but he couldn’t remember ever noticing it. Not like this.
It felt like a couple of layers of skin had been stripped off, leaving him exposed, vulnerable.
Gray clapped him on the shoulder. “Did you hear?”
“Hear what?”
“Damien got an eighty-nine. Dropping last run’s score, he’s got a ninety-one overall.”
“Hope he got a nice selfie,” one of the other competitors said. “Since he’s never coming to Freefest again. What kind of jerk-off invites the press to an event like this?”
“He wouldn’t come back anyway,” Will said. “This isn’t what he does. He’s a showboater. He likes the attention.”
His coach entered the tent, giving him a chin nod. “You’re up.” His phone vibrated, and he rolled his eyes. “Never should’ve brought the wife and kid with me, man.” He turned away to take the call.
The wife and kid. Just the thought of Ruby crunched his heart like a tin can. Walking out that door five days ago had been the hardest thing he’d ever done.
She was fine, though. He checked in with his family every day, and his sister was surrounded by people who loved her and would look out for her.
I miss her. He’d left his heart behind, tucked under her pillow. Most times, when he closed his eyes, he saw those little shoulders hunched, that apologetic expression. “I dus wike you, Wheel. I dus do.”
Another clap on the shoulder startled him out of his thoughts. “Hey.” Gray held his poles. When Will reached for them, his brother yanked them away. “You’re not going out there if your head’s not in it.”
“No, I’m good.” He wiped thoughts of Ruby out of his head. He’d already scrubbed out Delilah. All it took was an image of her in a conference room with Romano. He knew her, knew she’d turn it into a lunch meeting. Wow him with her food. She’s right where she needs to be. He shook it off and grabbed his poles.
“You sure?”
“Absolutely.”
“Okay, then. Let’s do this.”
Tuning out his brother and shutting the door on the mess of his personal life, Will skied over to the starting block. He stood there for a moment, visualizing the take-off, and then scissored his skis in the fresh, crunchy snow.
I got this.
He pushed off and slid down toward the rails. Pulling in his arms, he picked up speed, gearing up for the first set. One…two…three…he popped the lip.
Don’t hook an edge. Go, go, go.
He started rotating. One-eighty. Go, go, perfect. Yes. Three-sixty. Right when he hit Cab 3, he spotted his landing. Got it.
And…fuck yes. He’d stomped it.
The wall came at him in a rush, and he soared up it. His body tensed, shoulder ready to pull back, knees ready to lift. Wait. Wait. Wait—now. Will caught air, his right hand grabbing the ski behind his leg, the left gripping near the binding in front. Pulling his knees in, he held on hard for one…two…tighter, man, pull in tighter…three.
Fuckin’ A, man. Corkin’ it hard.
He let go of the grab, and it coul
dn’t have felt sweeter.
Sailing up the other wall, he pulled in his knees, threw his shoulder back and took off. One-eighty…spot it, man, fucking spot it…spin tighter…three-sixty…spot it, spot it…one more…push, push…come on…keep it tight…there…He came in backwards. Perfect.
Racing toward the ramp, Will ripped off the jump and pulled in tight…grabbed the ski…and shot into space. He let his muscles do what they’d trained seventeen years for and flipped and spun, pulling his skis in tight…and then—spot it—spot it—he fucking landed.
Nailed it.
Energy crashed through him, and he pumped his poles as he skied down the rest of the course. Couldn’t keep the smile off his face. Fuck, yeah.
Sliding in close to the gathered crowd, he turned his thighs in, slowing to an easy stop.
“Dude, that was epic,” someone called, laughing.
“You stomped it, man.”
“Will, look over here,” a man with a press pass said.
As his friends swarmed him, he ignored the reporter who had no business being there. Damien had fucked up big-time inviting the press to this event. The freestyle community would shut him out now.
Buzzing hard, Will just wanted to hear his scores. Cameras everywhere, questions flying at him, he popped off his skis and checked the scoreboard.
All of a sudden, the crowd went wild. His coach broke through the crowd. “Ninety-eight. You won.”
“Dude, you just won Freefest.”
“You’re the undisputed halfpipe champion of the world.”
And it would feel great—he’d be elated—if it weren’t for the unbearable ache in his chest.
“You coming, man?” Gray stood in the doorway of Will’s bedroom in the cabin he and a few of the other competitors had rented on the mountain.
Fixated on the laptop screen, he barely looked up. “I’ll catch up with you.”
“You sure?” Gray stood there, waiting for an answer.
Will knew his brother would drop his plans and hang out with him if that’s what he needed. “Just checking in at home. I’ll be right behind you.” As he waited for the call to connect, he heard the guys in the living room pregaming for a night of debauchery. Might be a small town, but it had a lively bar scene.