by Linda Warren
Elias jumped up with his fist in the air, a smile on his face. “When is a Rebel too tired to fight? Come on. I dare you.”
They gathered round their crazy brother. On cue from Quincy, they grabbed Elias. Quincy and Paxton had his arms. Falcon, Phoenix and Egan had his legs. They carried him into the corral and dropped him into the water trough, boots, cell phone and all.
Elias sputtered and splashed as the brothers stood around laughing, even Egan. Phoenix pulled off his boots, slipped his own cell phone inside one and then jumped into the water. Jude and Zane rode in from checking the herd. Zane leaped off his horse, removed his boots, climbed the fence and joined his uncles. Craziness ensued. They always found a way to beat the tiredness.
On the way back into the barn, Quincy said, “Did you know Rachel Hollister’s back in town?”
An invisible fist slammed into Egan’s chest. “N-no. I guess she came home for a visit.”
“I had to get license stickers for all our trailers at the courthouse and I went over and visited with Gabe. He mentioned that Rachel was living back at the Hollister house. She’s home for good and is going to teach art in the fall at Horseshoe schools.”
“I never expected that.”
“From the way she was looking at you on the day of the kidnapping, I’d say you have a lot to do with her returning.”
“How was she looking at me?”
“Like you were her whole world.”
Egan made his way toward the barn door, needing to be alone to think. Why would Rachel come back so soon?
“Hey, I’m talking to you.”
Egan looked back at his brother. “What?”
Quincy caught up with him. “What are you gonna do about it?”
“I’m going to the house, take a shower, eat something and crash.”
“Your call.” Quincy shrugged. “Lately, you’ve been different.”
“How?”
“You’ve been sleeping in your bed, and I like that you’ve finally gotten that chip off your shoulder.” He patted Egan’s back. “See you later.” Quincy went back into the barn and Egan noticed Jericho standing to the side, watching him.
“What?”
“I didn’t say anything.”
“But you’re thinking a lot.”
Jericho pulled off his dusty hat and scratched his head. “I’m just wondering what you’re so afraid of.”
Life. He was scared to death of life. He could face a man with a gun, fight killer dogs, but when it came to the man-woman relationship, he was scared out of his mind. He’d screwed up his life once and didn’t want to do that again. And he didn’t want to hurt Rachel.
When Quincy mentioned her name, Egan’s heart had pounded inside his chest like a jackhammer, and the urge to see her was strong. But once again he was holding back, because he wasn’t sure he had anything to offer her other than a life of toil and worry.
Egan stared at his friend, saw the marked lines of a rough life on his face and knew his secrets were safe with him. “I feel like I’m going to get my head shoved into a toilet again.”
Jericho smiled one of those rare smiles. “I’ll be there to pull you out, so go with your gut feeling.”
Egan thought about it later as he sat in the living room in his jeans, watching TV. Elias was stretched out on the sofa in his underwear. Quincy was sound asleep in his recliner. As much as Egan loved his brothers, he didn’t want to live the rest of his life with them.
Why had Rachel come back?
* * *
TOWARD THE END of June, Rachel could stand it no longer. Egan had to have heard she was back, and yet he’d made no move to see her. That should tell her all she needed to know. But...she had to hear that from him. It was a Monday and it took all day to screw up her courage to make the trip to Rebel Ranch.
The place was a lot different in the light of day. Barns and outbuildings seemed to be everywhere on this large ranch. Tractors with long trailers attached were parked at the barn. Trucks were parked to the left. It was late afternoon and evidently everyone was still working. She’d chosen the wrong time to come, but she couldn’t turn around now.
She parked near a tractor trailer and got out. A bowlegged elderly gentleman with graying hair, a worn hat and equally worn clothes came out of the barn. He stopped when he saw her.
“Can I help you, ma’am?”
She walked closer to him. “I’m looking for Egan Rebel.”
His eyes narrowed. “You don’t say.”
“Is he here?”
Before he could answer, two cowboys exited the barn. They were punching each other in the shoulders and horsing around, until they saw her. One walked right up to her with a gleam in his eye.
“Howdy, ma’am. Can I help you?” The word ma’am washed over her, but it wasn’t the way Egan said it.
“Get away from her,” the older gentleman said. “She’s here for Egan. Go get him and stop acting like a fool.”
The cowboy held out his hand. “I’m Elias.”
The other cowboy pushed him out of the way. “He’s nobody. I’m Paxton.”
Two more cowboys came from the barn, stopping the words on Rachel’s lips. “What’s going on?” the tallest, most broad shouldered one asked.
“This young girl wants to see Egan,” the old gentleman said. “Egan!” he shouted, so loudly Rachel’s ears popped.
The broad-shouldered cowboy held out his hand. “I’m Falcon, Ms. Hollister. It’s nice to finally meet you.”
“Thank you.” He said it with so much gallantry she had the urge to fan her face.
“I’m Quincy.” The other cowboy also shook her hand. “I’ll get Egan.”
But Elias and Paxton were already shouting his name and he wasn’t making an appearance. Maybe he’d made his escape. Rachel’s heart sank.
A woman in a long-sleeved Western shirt, jeans, boots and a straw hat came out of the barn. “Why is everyone hollering? Oh...” She walked over to Rachel. “I’m Kate Rebel.”
Rachel was getting claustrophobic from all the Rebels surrounding her, and her voice disappeared. She cleared her throat and then froze as Egan stepped out of the barn, with his dog at his heels.
“Why is everyone shouting my—Rachel!” The shock on his face said it all. He wasn’t happy to see her. She wanted to turn around and go home, but she wouldn’t admit defeat in front of the Rebel family.
Egan’s mom saved the moment. “Eden is bringing pizza for everybody, so get cleaned up and meet me at the house, and let’s give Egan some privacy with Ms. Hollister.” The woman looked at her. “You’re welcome to stay.”
“Th-thank you.”
Before anyone could move, two more cowboys strolled out of the barn and Rachel recognized them: Phoenix and Jude. Phoenix paused for a moment when he saw her and then walked over and hugged her.
“As I live and breathe, if it isn’t Rachel Hollister, the prettiest girl in our class. In the whole school.”
Jude nodded. “Nice to see you again.”
Rachel wanted to say so many things, but the words were locked in her throat as she kept staring at the stunned look on Egan’s face.
“Let’s go,” Kate said. “And stop acting like you’ve never seen a pretty girl before. I know y’all have better manners.”
“Now, Kate, they’re just boys being boys,” the old man said, and she glared at him.
“Don’t start with me, Abe.”
Without another word, Kate Rebel’s sons followed her. The old man ambled behind, glancing back a time or two. Rachel was left standing alone with Egan, who was still staring at her as if he’d been turned to stone.
“What are you doing here, Rachel?” he finally asked.
He made no move to come to her, so she had no choice but to walk to him on shaky legs. Tired lines were etched around his eyes and dust coated every inch of his clothes and hat. Clearly, he’d had a long day of work.
“I heard you visited my father.”
“Yeah. No big deal.” Egan’s voice wa
s not welcoming.
She bit her lip for patience. “It is a big deal, Egan. You carried a lot of resentment and hatred for a long time, and if you’ve let it go, it’s a wonderful thing. I don’t know why you’re acting so offended. Am I not allowed to come here to see you?”
“No, of course not.”
“Then why are you acting like you don’t want to see me?”
“Because I don’t.”
Rachel felt the words like a blow to her chest. But she gritted her teeth and refused to let them hurt her in the way he had intended. Something was wrong and she had to find out what it was. This wasn’t her Egan.
She glanced toward the house, to where two of his brothers were sitting on the back stoop. “Could we talk somewhere more private?”
Egan went into the barn and she followed him. She jumped back, startled, as she spotted a tall, scary-looking man just inside the door. “Oh.”
“This is Jericho.” Egan introduced his friend.
Rachel held out her hand. “It’s nice to meet you. Egan has spoken very highly of you.”
The man shook her hand with a strength that was just as startling. “Egan’s the best friend I’ve ever had.” After saying that, he moseyed out of the barn.
Rachel stared after him, but quickly brought her thoughts back to Egan. The pungent scent of alfalfa greeted her and there was a lot more hay in the barn than there had been before. He sat down on a fresh bale and rested his elbows on his knees. Pete curled up beside him.
“My father said you had a good visit.”
Egan rubbed his hands together. “Yes. I got a lot of the resentment out of my system and learned some things about myself. Mostly, I learned everything that happened to me was my fault. And no one else’s.”
“How wonderful, Egan, that you’re able to admit it.”
“It’s not so wonderful when you look back and realize you’ve caused your mother more suffering than she needed at the time.”
Feeling brave, Rachel sat beside him. “I’m sure she understood.”
“Yeah. That’s my mom.”
There was silence for a moment and Rachel searched for words, but the ones she wanted to say he might not want to hear. She had to say them, though. “I’ve returned to Horseshoe for good. I want to watch Erin and Trey grow, and spend time with them. This is my home and I want to live here. I’m looking for a place to rent. Mrs. Hornsby rents a room and I’m going to look at it tomorrow, for starters.”
Egan didn’t say anything, so she decided to be completely honest, as he’d always been. “If you’re thinking I came back because of you, you’d be right.”
He looked at her, his dark eyes troubled. “Why would you do that? You and I have no future.”
She took a deep breath, his words hurting in a way she couldn’t disguise. “Why? My father’s not an issue anymore, so tell me why we can’t at least date and get to know each other better.”
“It’s complicated.”
“No, it isn’t. It’s really very simple. I love you. I know that in my heart and I knew it the moment I first looked into your dark eyes. I knew it for certain the night we made love. I don’t understand why you can’t admit you love me, too. We’ve known each other only a short time, but sometimes, I’m told, love happens like that. I’m willing to take a chance on us. Why are you so afraid to do that?”
“This conversation is over.” He stood abruptly and headed for the door
“Don’t you dare walk out on me, Egan Rebel. You at least owe me an explanation. And I demand it.”
He swung around, the hurt in his eyes undeniable. “You want the truth, Rachel? I live and work here on this ranch. It’s hard work and I make very little money, but this is my life, and someday a part of this ranch will be mine. You’re used to the finer things in life and I can’t offer you that. Is that simple enough for you? You don’t fit into my world. Can you see yourself married to a man who toils fourteen hours a day without rest? Can you see yourself married to a cowboy?”
She stood up. “Yes. If that cowboy is you.”
“That’s just a fantasy in your head, like it was when we were at the cabin. You can’t live in a fantasy world, Rachel.”
“You keep putting up these excuses like barbed-wire fences to keep me out. I’m asking you once again, what are you so afraid of?”
He looked down at the ground and didn’t answer, and she knew he was never going to give them a chance. This was it and she had to have the courage to admit Egan was never going to love her the way she loved him.
She walked past him toward the door.
“I’m scared of failing.” His voice was low, but she caught it. She turned back with hope in her heart. “I screwed up my life so much and I don’t want to screw up yours. You deserve the very best of everything and I can’t give you that. Please, don’t make this hard on us.”
She moved to within a few inches of him. “I’ve been all over the world with my mom and shopped in the most exclusive stores, but I’ve never been more happy than when I was with you at the cabin.”
“You can’t mean that.”
“I do. It wasn’t about where I was. It was about who I was with, and the peace and harmony that filled me just being there with you. That’s what it’s all about, Egan. That feeling of being complete when you’re with that person, and that’s the way I feel.” She cocked her head to look at him. “How do you feel about me? That’s the main question.”
He raised his eyes to hers. “I think about you all the time. I couldn’t sleep in my bed because the scent of you was there. I kept telling myself I’d forget you, but every day I remembered you more and more. I...I love you. I don’t want to, but I do.”
It seemed as if she’d waited forever for him to say that, and a tear trickled down her cheek. He wiped it away with his thumb and she leaned her face into the palm of his hand. “Will you marry me, Rachel Hollister?”
Tears sparkled in her eyes. “Marriage? I was hoping for a date.”
“I’m in this for the long haul.”
Her heart raced so fast she could barely speak. “Then say it the right way.”
A smile split his face. “Will you marry me, ma’am?”
“Yes.” She threw her arms around his neck and he clasped her tight against him. They held on to each other, enjoying this moment when they’d finally gotten through all the bad stuff. Then his lips met hers and the world spun away, with just the two of them standing against all the forces that had brought them here to this moment.
He kissed her cheeks, her neck and lower. “Where are we going to live?” he whispered against her skin. “I share a house with two brothers and I can’t ask you to live there.”
She ran her fingers through his hair, knocking his hat to the ground. “We’ll figure it out. As long as we’re together we can make this work.”
He held her face in his hands. “Are you ready to be a cowboy’s wife?”
“I’m ready to be your wife.”
“I love you, ma’am.”
Epilogue
They were married at the end of July in a small church Rachel had attended as a child. A church wedding was important to both of them. Rachel wore a beautiful white gown her father had bought, because it was something he knew Rachel’s mother would’ve wanted.
When she came down the aisle to him, Egan was struck by how much he loved Rachel, and he’d never realized until that moment just how much a part of him she had become. He was now a firm believer in love at first sight. He would love Rachel forever.
Judge Hollister gave a reception at his house and later Egan and Rachel drove back to the ranch, changed clothes, loaded the ranger and headed for the cabin. It was where Rachel wanted to spend their honeymoon. He didn’t try to dissuade her, because it seemed important to her.
It was the peak of summertime with no air-conditioning, but they didn’t notice the heat. They swam in the creek, pulled the mattress onto the porch and slept out there. Everything was primitive, even their nee
d for each other. They stayed until their food supply ran out, and then they returned to civilization, suntanned and happy.
Egan had taken Rachel to see the Fitzwater place and she loved the old antebellum house as much as he did. Even the caved-in roof, the buzzards living inside, the rotted boards and the trash strewn around didn’t change her mind.
He’d bought a used one-bedroom mobile home and set it up not far from the house. Every day after cowboying he worked on the house, and his brothers helped. It was going to take a while to restore the place, and in the meantime they lived in the trailer. It was small but they didn’t care. They were with each other, and Rachel was right. It was all they needed.
Egan and Jericho finished installing the last window late one afternoon.
“That’s it,” Rico said. “They look damn good.”
Egan wiped his hands on his jeans. “Yeah.”
A car honked and he turned to see Rachel crossing the cattle guard in her white Mustang. She was now teaching and the days were long without her. He found himself watching the time on his phone so he could quit work when she got home.
“The wife is home,” Jericho said. “And I have to get back to the ranch. What’s next on the house?”
“Insulation.”
“Call if you need me.”
Rachel drove up, got out and hugged Jericho. Then she walked toward Egan in her slim-fitting dress and heels. She removed the clip and shook her head until her tousled hair floated around her like a cloud, then paused at the bottom of the steps.
“Hello, cowboy.”
He tipped his hat. “Howdy, ma’am.”
She squealed and ran up the steps into his arms. He held her for a moment and then kissed her deeply, just to make up for the hours they’d been apart.
Pete barked incessantly at their feet, forcing them to notice him.
“You know what he wants,” Egan said.
“I’m spoiling this dog.” Rachel bent to hug Pete and then ran back to her car. Pete jumped up and down, eager to see what she had for him. In the yard, she placed two kolache on a brown paper bag and he gobbled them up, wagging his tail.
Egan sat on the stoop, watching his wife and wondering why he ever thought she wouldn’t fit into his world. She drove the tractor while he loaded hay onto it, and she got up at dawn to go with him to check the herd. She was perfect in every way, and every day she reminded him just how perfect she was in everything she did.