by A. E. Murphy
“Somebody in here smells like their grandad,” I comment, giggling and opening a window.
“Shit, Carl, man, what is that?” Leroy laughs as Carl looks frantically through his bag and pulls out what is now an empty canister of Lynx deodorant. “Did it spray the whole tank into your bag?”
“It must have been pressed against one of my balls,” Carl mutters and we all burst out into a fit of laughter when he pulls two tennis balls from the bottom of his bag and a wet textbook. The stench gets stronger. “I mean, I heard a hissing but I thought I was low key farting.”
“Low key farting!” Leroy cackles so loudly he begins to choke. “Oh, man. Low key farting. Fuck me in the rear with a gag. That was epic, man. Low key farting. Shit.”
Dillan calms himself for long enough to get the car moving. “You all right, Ty?”
I nod, wishing I had the courage to admit I wasn’t listening. He places his hand over mine on my lap. “I’ll look after you, don’t worry.”
“Look after me?” I blurt, fighting the urge to flip my hand under his and lace our fingers together. He’s so cool, running at a temperature that seems to be lower than mine. “Your hand is so cold.”
He winks and places his hand back on the steering wheel.
“I didn’t say move it.” Again, I blurt without putting any real thought into what words my lips are forming.
I’m surprised when he places his hand back onto mine and gives it a gentle squeeze. I’m sure he’s doing it to be friendly but part of me has to wonder if he does this with all of his female friends and if he even considers me a friend.
We pull into a carpark, behind a place called ‘Hoppers’. It’s a trampoline place. I’ve heard of it but I’ve never been. I can’t imagine why anybody of my size would. I’d knock myself out with my own tits.
“Dillan,” I whisper when Leroy and Carl exit the car. “You’ll be fine; it’ll be fun.”
“How’d you figure?” I ask. He ignores me, unfolds his lean, athletic body from the driver’s seat and jogs around to my side.
“I’m going to die.”
“You’ll be fine,” he chuckles and helps me out. “I’m going to break the trampolines.”
“You don’t weigh nearly enough.”
My brow arches and my hand rests on my hip. “You want to bet?”
“Do you?” He asks, mimicking my look and stance, though his lips are twitching with a smirk.
“Come on, lovers,” Leroy shouts from the entrance.
Carl tugs him inside, leaving us to have some semblance of privacy.
“Trust me,” Dillan pleads, holding out his hand for me to take. I hesitate but when he raises his hand higher, I take it, shaking a little. “Live a little, Ty; you might actually smile more.”
“And she has a very pretty smile,” Leroy comments, appearing out of nowhere.
“Back off, Roy,” Dillan snaps, shoving against his friend’s chest.
I bite back a laugh when Leroy stumbles backwards, almost falling but catching himself on a poor, unsuspecting, dark blue Corsa.
“Ignore him.” Dillan pulls me ahead, past Leroy who seems to find this entire thing hilarious. “I know he’s a bit hard to take but he’s been my friend since year eight. Sometimes my only friend.”
I give him a reassuring smile as our eyes meet. “You don’t have to explain anything to me. I’m just happy to be here… with you.” I clear my throat and add, “And your friends. On this normal, friendly, platonic outing in which all of you become accomplices in my death.”
He laughs, throwing his head back and showing me his marvellous throat. Never have I been so aroused by the sight of a neck as I am now. Is this even normal? I’m beginning to question my sanity.
We enter the building and the stench of rubber, plastic and sweat assault my nostrils. I can hear people babbling over each other; it’s a steady hum of voices that can’t be plucked out of the air to decipher.
Dillan leads me to a lady behind a computer desk. There’s a row of them and this one seems to have been chosen at random.
“Emily here?” He asks and the girl shakes her head. “You lying?”
“No,” the girl responds haughtily. Upon further inspection of her neat, black and yellow uniform, I notice her name embroidered on the large, low hanging collar. Sylvie. “She hasn’t been in all week.”
Dillan raises his thick, dark brows. “You sure about that?”
“Are you here to bounce or control your sister?” She snaps, leaning forward and giving him a pointed look.
He sighs. “Two for the main.”
She prints off the tickets and holds them out to him as he scans his ‘Hopper’ card on a red flashing light on a stand in front of the desk.
“I can pay for myself,” I whisper so only he can hear.
“I know.” He tucks the tickets into my jacket pocket and zips it up. “But that’s not how I roll. I invited you; I pay.”
“Does that mean if I invite you somewhere, I pay?” He grins with amusement, his eyes twinkling with it. “Remind me never to invite you to Hawaii…”
His grin turns into a full-blown smile and his arm hooks around my neck. “And miss seeing you in a bikini?”
“I don’t even own a bikini.”
“In that case,” he says, quietly into my ear, so close I can feel his breath and, fuck me, it’s making me shiver. “I invite you shopping, so we can rectify that.”
Then, without waiting for an answer, he leads me up a long staircase and into a locker room where we kick off our shoes and place our belongings into a secure locker.
“Where are Leroy and Carl?”
“Who knows? Probably chatting the women up downstairs; there’s some kind of class going on in the studio.”
“That doesn’t surprise me.” I shake my head and follow him out of the locker room.
The main trampoline room is huge. It has at least twenty trampolines on the floor, between padded breaks, and slanted trampolines on the walls. There’s a pit full of foam which I see people dive into and land with a joyful cry.
“I’m not sure about this.” I test the first trampoline with a few slow bounces. Dillan stands in front of me and holds my hands. Then he jumps and I go up as he comes down. This, according to him, is apparently hilarious, especially when I land on my arse with a thud. I laugh with him as my fears of making a fool of myself slowly vanish. All that’s left is fun and joy as he teaches me to bounce and land properly. Before I know it, we’re leaping and falling over each gap, careful to not collide into other people and each other. Of course, Dillan shows off, especially when Leroy and Carl finally join us. He does backflips, front flips, twist flips and failed flips.
I sit on a swaying trampoline and laugh so hard I can’t breathe. My belly hurts.
“They should have called this cocaine because it is sending me HIGH!” Leroy sings in a high-pitched voice as he reaches the highest height he’s reached yet and lands with an impressive bounce, which sends him sailing onto my trampoline. “So…” He wags his eyebrows at me. “You and Dillan done it yet?”
“Fuck off,” I snap, though I know he’s only trying to wind me up.
“Want to see who’s better?” He wags his eyebrows again, this time creepily and heavy with suggestion.
“No, thank you.”
“Leave her alone, Leroy.” Dillan bounces to my rescue. “You need to stop treating her like an object before I lose my shit with you.”
“Did you just swear?” I smirk but it falls on deaf ears. He’s too busy glowering at his friend.
“Have some respect. She’s not your toy.”
“She’s not yours either, so she’s free pickings in my opinion,” Leroy laughs, rolling away as Dillan aims a kick at him.
“Ew,” I murmur, pretending to vomit using my fingers. Carl laughs and holds out a hand. “Follow me, fair maiden.
I shall lead you away from these bawling beasts of masculinity and testosterone.” It’s then I notice, for the first
time ever, that Carl is batting for the same team as me. It seems I have a bit of competition for Dillan’s affections. How have I not noticed this before?
I take his hand and we bounce to freedom, watching Dillan and Leroy argue in the distance. They seem to make up and join us, though Dillan’s mood has visibly soured.
“Let’s go,” he snaps, nodding to me and Carl.
“Leroy?” Carl asks but Leroy follows behind, his hands tucked into his pockets and his head bowed with shame. Whatever Dillan said must have hit its mark. I kind of wish I’d stuck around to listen.
After a long and awkward drive, Dillan drops Leroy and Carl off at the end of Carl’s street without saying a word to either of them. Carl thanks him but Leroy just looks seriously annoyed.
As soon as they’re gone I find the courage to speak. “I hope I haven’t caused any problems by being present.”
“No, this is on Leroy. He’s a pig. Your presence is never and should never be a problem.” He turns to me and gives me a stern look. “Don’t let anybody treat you less than you’re worth just because you’re present. Whatever that means.”
My eyes burn as his words hit a mark with me. Does he realise how sweet he is? How kind?
I’ve never wanted to kiss him more than I do right now and I can’t even fight the urge. As I stare intently into his eyes that can’t quite decide if they’re grey or green, I begin to lean forward. My tongue gently moistens my lips and I see him realise my intentions before I realise them.
When I feel my lips on his, my heart stops and panic overwhelms me. Especially when his feel too soft to be respondent.
Fuck.
He’s not into it.
I pull back immediately and stare straight ahead, feeling shaky and nauseous from my own stupidity.
“I’m sorry,” I rush, swallowing the lump in my throat. “I’ve never done that before.”
“Kissed?” I hear the smile in his voice but daren’t look at him.
“I am so sorry, you just… you were being so nice…”
“Ty,” he laughs and twists a lock of my hair around his fingers. “Don’t be sorry.”
That’s all he says before putting the car in drive and taking me all the way home.
I’ve fucked up everything, haven’t I? Now I definitely feel like crying.
“I’ll see you first thing,” he says softly, trying to catch my eyes as I try to hide them from him. I don’t want him to see the shame swimming in them. “Unless you’re too sore after all of the jumping?”
“I feel fine,” I lie. I feel sick. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
“See you in the morning.”
Except in the morning, he doesn’t turn up.
“Hello?” I roll onto my phone, still more than half asleep and yawn loudly.
“Tyler, it’s me, Dillan.”
“Oh.” Now I’m awake. “Hey… are you okay?”
“Yeah, it’s umm… I’m an idiot.”
“Why?”
“Because…” He falls silent for a few moments. “Can I still take you to my mum’s restaurant later?”
Out of pity? I snort. “I have plans.”
“Then change them.”
“I think I’ve embarrassed myself enough, don’t you? Thank you, though.” I hang up before he can press the issue and then turn my phone off so he doesn’t disturb my lie in any more than he already has.
But then Mum comes along and ruins it anyway, less than twenty minutes later.
“Dillan’s here,” she announces after pushing my bedroom door open with a mighty bang against the door stop.
“Why?” I grumble and bury my face into the pillow.
“Come on in, she’s decent.” Mum laughs like an evil troll and I hear Dillan say, “Umm… I don’t think…” But she disappears, leaving me to hide under my pillow and blanket and Dillan to stand awkwardly in my bedroom doorway.
“You got here fast,” I tell him through my bedding. “Are you wearing pyjamas?”
“And yesterday’s makeup,” I grumble and the pillow and blanket are gone. “Hey! You can’t just do that.”
I sit up and glare at him and his cute face as he tries to stifle his laughter. “Get up. Get dressed.”
“Why?”
“So my eyes don’t bleed at the sight of you.” My glare darkens.
“Seriously, your hair has its own gravitational pull right now.” He leans forward and plucks a large ball of fluff from the tangled mess.
I blink slowly and stand, stretching my hands to the ceiling. It’s too late to be embarrassed now. Besides, my sleepy brain won’t allow it.
“It’s weird that my mum just lets you in here.” I head into my bathroom and cringe at the sight of myself in the mirror. Worried Dillan might follow me, I slam the door shut.
“I’ll just wait out here,” he calls. “In your room. All alone.”
“Touch my stuff and I’ll stab you.”
“You’re friendly this morning.”
I think I hear him sit on my bed and hope that it still smells fresh and not of my sweaty body. Not that I smell, I’m just paranoid.
I’m praying my mum will be responsible and distract him so that when I exit the shower in nothing but a towel, I won’t have to kick him out, although Dillan strikes me as the gentlemanly type so I don’t think he’ll hang around.
When I exit the bathroom, my bedroom is empty. I can’t help but feel a stab of disappointment which is a bit hypocritical of me because if he were here, I’d definitely be annoyed at him.
Rushing through the dressing process, I opt for a beautiful black and white jump suit. It hangs low on my chest in a pointed V and flares out a little at the hips, giving my body the illusion of a thinner waist. Saying that though, it feels a lot baggier than usual. I really do need to find out my weight.
After pinning my hair up in a neat, twisted bun atop my head, I apply minimal makeup, grab my jacket and descend the stairs where I hear my dad and Dillan conversing in the kitchen. As I draw nearer I note that they’re talking about universities.
“Hey.” I bite on my lip and stand in the doorway. When my mum and dad look at me, my mum’s eyebrows hit her hairline and my dad’s jaw hits the floor.
“Holy crap, Tyler, where’s my little girl gone?” Dad comments.
“You look amazing! Look how slim your arms are looking.” Mum grins and gives my left one a squeeze.
“Dramatic much?” I murmur, feeling my cheeks get warm. I look at Dillan, who is perusing me even deeper than my parents. His pupils seem to have expanded and his lips glisten with fresh moisture as he blows slowly through them. Does he like what he sees? “Are we going?”
Blinking rapidly, he clears his throat and rights himself. “Definitely.” He turns to my dad and offers him a hand. “It was great to meet you, Mr Shepherd.”
“You too, Dillan. Look after my girl now.”
“Always.” Dillan grins and accepts my mum’s hug.
“Don’t be a stranger,” she tells him, wagging her eyebrows at me over his shoulder.
“Come on.” I grab the back of his belt loop and yank him backwards towards me. He follows me through the hall and out of the house, much to my relief. “Literally, if you keep being that nice to my parents they’re going to start planning our wedding.”
He laughs loudly and opens the passenger door of his car for me. “Your parents are nice.”
“Yeah,” I agree. “They are pretty cool. Just don’t tell them I said that.”
The door closes and he’s soon sitting beside me. “So…” I look at him. “What are we doing?”
“You’ll see.” He smiles secretively and as much as I want to press him for more information, I just can’t. I’m too excited for it to be a surprise.
I’m happy that he doesn’t bring up me kissing him the other day. I’m mortified enough without that reminder. Thank heavens. I bet he’s been thinking about it, though. It’ll forever be between us. One day, if we remain friends, I bet he’ll
joke about it and it’ll become that funny time when I tried to eat his face.
It’s for the avoidance of this conversation that I’m reluctant to bring up our lack of contact for the past two days. He was probably processing what happened while giving me the chance to cool my libido.
“My mum is looking forward to meeting you later,” he tells me and now I’m wondering what he’s said to his mum about me. “She’s only really met a couple of my exes and my mates. First time I’ve ever had a female friend, so she’s intrigued.”
Female friend, there it is. His subtle reminder that we aren’t meant to be.
“She probably thinks I’m a lesbian.”
“No, but she’ll think I’m gay when she sees you later,” he jests and I blush at his compliment. “You look…” He drags his teeth across his lower lip. “Nice.”
“Nice?” I laugh, looking at my reflection in the wing mirror. “So do you, but you always do.”
“Thank you. It almost makes me feel bad for where I’m about to take you. You might get a bit dishevelled.”
“Dishevelled,” I snort. “You use such fancy arse words sometimes.”
He shrugs, his cheeks pink. “My dad… he’s… well when you meet him, you’ll see.”
When I meet him. Not if.
I feel bad now for tainting our budding friendship with my lusting.
“I shall look forward to it.” Then I add. “Will I fancy him, though?”
He laughs under his breath and mutters a sharp, “Ew.”
We’re driving for what seems like a lifetime when we pull into a dodgy looking alleyway and park behind a large silver truck. I wish I’d paid attention to the front of the building because I have no idea where we are.
A large, red metal door to our left swings open and a Hispanic looking man with thick hair and even thicker glasses on his eyes puts a cigarette between his lips and lights it. When he sees Dillan, he smiles as the smoke leaves his nostrils. It reminds me of a dragon, kind of like the one tattooed on his neck, I notice as we get closer. It’s not huge but the tail wraps around the back of his neck. I’m not sure where it ends but when he sees me leaning to try and figure it out, he smiles and the thick lenses of his glasses make his eyes seem even smaller.