by A. E. Murphy
“Great view,” I remark and roll my eyes to him. “Care to tell me why I’m out here in the cold and not in there?”
“Do you want my jacket?”
“Definitely not.” I raise my chin defiantly. “This had better be important.”
“We look ridiculous in there,” he snaps. “You’re clearly avoiding me.”
“I’m granting your wish,” I snap back, finally meeting his eyes in the darkness.
“I didn’t mean what I said. Upon reflection, I realise how it all came across.”
“Bravo, you have a brain cell. Can I go back inside now?”
His frown is dangerous. “Now you’re being a bitch.”
“No, I’m choosing to not forgive you.”
“I’m sorry,” he says, pinching my chin between his thumb and finger to force me to look at him. “I should never have spoken to you the way I did, but this…” He motions to my new look. I couldn’t be more annoyed and offended if I tried. “You didn’t have to do this just to get my attention.”
“Oh and the narcissist is back,” I laugh, throwing his hand away. “I didn’t do this for you. I did this for me.”
“Let me finish.” He grabs my arm but I pull free. “Don’t touch me.”
“I’ve said I’m sorry. I mean it. You’re my friend, Tyler. I miss you, okay?”
“Not buying it and also not interested,” I respond. “I don’t give third chances.”
“Not interested?” He looks as though he can’t believe this is happening and I’m glad of that. I want him to feel as frustrated as he makes me feel.
“You missed your chance,” I tell him. “To be my friend, to be more. I don’t like you anymore. At all. You literally fucking broke me the other day and if you honestly think I’m going to let you back in so you can break me again, you have another thing coming.”
“Fine.” He raises his hands and neatens his tie. “You’re a piece of work, you know that?”
“Thank you. Now if you don’t mind, I have family and guests to entertain. Feel free to sulk out here for the rest of the night.” I step past him and race ahead to the dining hall. If only I had vodka right now.
That was so fucking hard to do.
When I return to the table, I see my mum and Dillan’s mum cringe together. I’m assuming they’ve gathered that we haven’t resolved anything due to the fact I’ve returned before him.
I retake my seat quietly so as to not disturb the conversation between Nathan, my dad and Nan. Dillan joins us a few moments later as his mother asks me about my future as a midwife. She seems genuinely interested and I love talking about it, so I’m happy to respond.
When Dillan returns he claims his seat opposite me and gives me the longest glare imaginable. It doesn’t go unnoticed and neither does the rolling of my eyes. I swear his mum snorts at my response or at our behaviour. I don’t look at her to gauge her reaction though for fear that she dislikes me purely because her son seems to.
“Smile,” Mum whispers into my ear. I plaster on a fake one and continue conversing with his family. At least now they know we obviously hate each other they won’t bother to make plans such as this.
“Oh, that would be amazing!” Gwen grins, obviously excited about something. I shouldn’t have been so lost in my own head. “We’ll make a plan first thing.” She turns to her husband, who smiles warmly at her. “Doesn’t that sound like fun?”
“It does,” he agrees.
“You never told me you had horses.” Dillan frowns.
“I don’t; my grandparents do,” I respond, giving him a blank look.
“I love horses,” he mumbles.
“You love all animals,” I comment, raising a brow. “Except beetles.”
“Yeah well, beetles are just creepy.”
“And turtles.”
“I don’t like that they can just pop out of their shells at any time.”
I laugh because it’s weird, just like I laughed when he first confessed his fears to me.
“Suddenly I’m thinking a pet turtle isn’t a bad idea,” I tell Dad and smirk when Dillan’s scowl deepens.
Nathan grins at his drink and Dillan turns his scowl to him.
“How’s Zeus? He’s a lovely dog,” Mum asks Dillan. “Tyler introduced me to him on Friday last week.”
Dillan looks at me with a curious eye as he replies, “He’s amazing. I taught him to roll over.”
“I taught him that,” I argue. “We both did.”
This time I scowl at him. It’s childish but I can’t help it. “How many horses do they have?” Dillan asks as my mum and Gwen continue to converse about my grandparents’ business after talking about how sweet we are for volunteering at a pet shelter in our spare time.
“They have around thirty, I think. They raise them.” I bite on my lip. “It’s a big business. They stay there rarely. They’re more into it for the money than the joy of it.”
“Shame.” He looks to his parents. “Why don’t you own horses?”
“Too much work,” Nathan responds and sips his drink. He turns to Gwen. “Is the food coming yet?”
“Give them chance,” she snaps. “They’re perfecting it, probably scared of how I’ll react to it.”
“Are you a rager?” I ask, grinning at the thought of such a sweet woman being an angry bitch with her staff.
“Sometimes.” Her wink makes me grin broader. “The food is amazing,” I tell my parents.
“We’ve been trying to get a table here for ages but every time we’re free, the restaurant has no spaces,” my dad sighs. “This is going to be such a delight.”
“I can only apologise. I don’t handle the bookings but I’ve heard it’s a long waiting list.” Gwen explains and then her eyes light up with an idea. “I tell you what, we’ll impose on you and your beautiful horses and I’ll cook in the evening.”
“Oh, you don’t have to do that.” Mum waves her off. “It’s not necessary. You’re welcome anytime, with or without food.”
“But preferably with,” I joke and even Dillan snorts at that.
“It’d be my pleasure.”
Nathan sighs with relief when the plates of food that were ordered during our outdoor talk finally arrive at our table. My stomach growls hungrily. So hungrily it hurts.
“Oh my gosh,” I say wistfully and spear a potato with my fork. “I never want to eat anywhere else again.”
“You’re too kind,” Gwen smiles. “She’s so appreciative of my food, unlike a certain male at this table.”
“You’re just sour because I’m going to be better than you soon.” Dillan grins arrogantly but playfully.
“I’m hoping so. I can stop doing most of the cooking at home,” Gwen adds and Dillan’s smile falls.
“Hey, don’t take it too far.”
Gwen turns her attention to her mother in law. “How’s your fish, Patricia?”
“Wonderful as always.” The lady smiles and her eyes sweep across the table. “It all looks lovely.”
“Better than Kerim’s?” Gwen looks as hopeful as she did just moments ago.
“Maybe one day,” Patricia states and both Nathan and Dillan snigger quietly. Gwen scowls at them both and I’m shocked to see how much her and Dillan look alike when scowling.
“It’s not you cooking though,” I point out, “so it doesn’t count.”
“True.”
Mum and Gwen exchange numbers at the table. Patricia rolls her eyes and I can only assume it’s because they’re breaking the no phone rule. Fortunately, she’s deep in a conversation with my dad and Nathan so I doubt she minds too much. Dillan follows their lead and pulls his own phone out. He taps away at the screen before tucking it back into the breast pocket of his jacket. I can’t believe I didn’t notice before that he’s wearing a suit. My anger at him has clearly blinded me to his looks and bloody hell he looks handsome. He always looks handsome but there’s just something about a well-dressed guy in a suit that really gets my blood racing.
I have a few missed messages; two are from Leroy, both begging me to go to his party tonight.
Tyler: Depending what time this gathering finishes, I should be able to come for a little while. Who’s there?
I leave Dillan’s until last, purely to score a point against him. He watches me intensely as I use my phone. I hope he notices that I ignore his.
Dillan: Come back to my Nan’s after this. Let’s hang out. I’ll drop you off later. I feel bad for hurting you. You know that, right? I am sorry. If I’ve been a dick, let me work at being better. Just like I helped you run five miles without dying, you help me to be a better person.
Fuck. He’s good with words. I chew on the inside of my cheek.
I catch his eye and soften my gaze before responding.
Tyler: Okay, maybe I’ve been a bit of a psycho… I’m sorry too. But I can’t tonight, I’m going to Leroy’s party after this.
When his phone vibrates, he pulls it from his pocket and his angry eyes snap to mine. “Looking like that?” His tone is louder than even he was anticipating as the entire table look at him. My cheeks heat as they assess us. He doesn’t seem ashamed as he continues, “That’s not happening.”
Blink. “Hey, Dad.” I elbow my dad in the ribs. “I don’t need you anymore; I have a new one.”
“Funny,” Dillan says, glaring openly at me.
“They thought so,” I comment, smiling with smugness.
“I’m serious though.” He lowers his voice even though everybody else can still hear. I know they’re pretending not to listen, but I also know that they definitely are.
“I told him I’d go.”
“Then un-tell him.”
“That’s not even a thing,” I mutter but it only spurs another glare from him. “I’m not the kind of person who lets people down. I said I’d go, so I’m going.”
“Going where?” Mum asks, leaning into me. “To a friend’s gathering at his house.”
“It’s a party,” Dillan corrects, quirking a brow at me.
“You’re going to a party?” Mum asks, looking impressed. “I hardly believe it.”
For crying out loud. “I’ll be back by midnight.”
Mum frowns but I know she won’t say no. She trusts me and it isn’t like I ever go anywhere.
“I’ll take her and bring her home,” Dillan assures her. “Seeing as she’s so insistent on experiencing one of Leroy’s parties.”
“Ugh, Leroy,” Gwen cringes and my mum’s eyes lose their excitement and fill with concern.
“Leroy?” Mum frowns and looks to Gwen for answers.
“He’s hard to take,” Gwen replies with an apologetic smile. “He’s a troubled kid.”
My dad stiffens. “You better not be mixing with the wrong crowd, Tyler.”
Eye roll. “And what would you say is the right crowd?”
“He’s not bad like that; he’s just weird and a little bit in your face,” Gwen goes on, reassuring them that I’m not about to start shooting shit into my arm.
“He’s a player,” Dillan says this to me and I resist the urge to roll my eyes again. “He’s got no respect for anyone, especially not women.”
“I’m not about to marry him. He treats me well enough for now.”
“For now,” Dillan mimics carefully. “And for now, I’ll enjoy it while it lasts.”
His jaw clenches and his lips thin to a white line. “We’ll go together. I said I’d show my face anyway.”
“Oh joy.” Sarcasm drips from my tone and it doesn’t go unnoticed. “This should be fun.”
“You have your key?” His Nan asks and he nods.
“You’re never home anymore.” Gwen pouts. “I miss you.”
“Mum.” He rolls his eyes but I see his cheeks pink. “I’ll come home tomorrow.”
“Leave him be. He loves his grandma, don’t you, Dillan?” Patricia grins and pats his hand on the table.
“Both of you be safe,” Nathan implores, giving us an intense look. “Don’t even think about having even a sip if you’re driving.”
“I’m not stupid.” Dillan rolls his eyes and I can see that his father disapproves of his lack of respect.
“You really don’t have to go,” I say to Dillan. “I do,” he says back, his frown evident. “Why?”
“Why don’t you two go ahead to your shindig and let us adults do some bonding?” Gwen suggests. “It’s getting late anyway.”
I look to my parents who give me a nod of approval. I then look to Dillan, who shrugs and stands.
We say our goodbyes, thanking them for the meal, and, with a hand on the crook of my arm, he leads me from the restaurant and outside.
“Did you and your parents come in separate cars?” I ask when he leads me to his. “That’s weird. Do you even have a life with them anymore? I feel like you’re too grown up for your age.”
He doesn’t reply. I wonder what’s wrong but I think I already know. He’s upset that I’m essentially forcing him to go to this party.
“You don’t have to take me,” I say after her opens my car door for me. He slams it shut once I’m in the passenger seat and walks steadily around to his side. “I’m serious. You’re starting to piss me off.”
“You said you don’t want to see me anymore, remember? So, I’m just here to chauffeur you silently.”
“You’re kidding?”
“You don’t want me in your life,” he points out, putting the car in gear.
“Now you’re being pathetic. I’m not going anywhere with you if you’re going to be like this all night.” I blow out a breath when he ignores me. “This is making me so uncomfortable. Your mood swings are stupid. Get yourself a manpon and get the fuck over it.” He continues to ignore me. “Why does it bother you so badly? What is it about me wanting to go to a party for the first time in my life that makes you so bloody irate?”
“Because he’ll see what you’re wearing as an invitation to treat you like an object.” He turns to look at me, his eyes softer this time.
“He won’t.”
“You don’t know him like I do,” he laughs humourlessly. “You rejected him; now you’re a challenge.”
“I’m not that easy. Still a virgin, remember?”
“Shit happens after vodka. I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret.”
I laugh a little, feeling more and more annoyed at his presumptions and mood. “If something happens, it happens. What’s the big deal?”
“Are you serious?” He frowns, running his hands through his hair. His look is one of disbelief.
“Deadly.”
He places his hands back on the steering wheel and finally gets the car moving.
It takes him a while and a few deep breaths but he does finally speak. “Do you like him?”
My eyes roll heavenward.
“Just be honest about it. Do you like him like that?”
“I’m a big girl. It’s really none of your business.”
“We’re friends. Of course it’s my business when you’re doing something stupid.”
Annoyed at his questioning, I decide to twist it around onto him, to see how he likes it. “Pretty sure you and Leona got it on at one of Leroy’s parties. Why is it okay for her and not for me?”
“Are you forgetting that me and Leona did stupid shit while under the influence of vodka?” The thought of this still makes me a little jealous so nope, I’m definitely not forgetting. “We aren’t a good example.”
“Yeah, but,” I push. “Did you get angry at her for wanting to go or did you get excited at the thought of her being there?”
“She wasn’t my friend before.”
Sigh. “It’s too late; we’re going. Get over it. You can’t control me.”
“I’m not trying to control you. I’m trying to protect you.”
Okay, this thaws the f
rost in my heart a fraction. A very miniscule fraction but enough to make me not hate him so much right now.
“Look, I appreciate the concern but I actually want to go. I promise to not drink if it makes you feel better. I’ll get my dad to pick me up. Okay? You don’t have to babysit me.”
“We’re going together.” His tone is final so I don’t argue.
We’re already on our way anyway, so what more can I do?
“Won’t Leona be upset? I don’t want to step on her toes and put myself on somebody’s death list.”
“Leona’s cool,” he responds, his tone finally calm, and I wonder if that’s the effect she has on him. All I seem to do is piss him off. “She’s not that kind of girl.”
“You hope.” I giggle and check my face in the mirror on the underside of the sun guard.
“If she is, it won’t work,” he states, keeping his eyes set on the road.
“Not nice being controlled, is it?”
He winces. I see it in his eye as it creases at the corner and his lips thin briefly.
“You aren’t going to change him, you know?”
“What on earth are you going on about now?” I resist the urge to rub my temples. My head is starting to hurt. “Change him?” And then I ask, “Change who? Leroy?” I hit the back of my head against the head rest. “You’re obsessed. Mind your own business. There’s being a friend and then there’s just being a dick. You’ve made it loud and clear that I’m not good enough or pretty enough for anyone.”
“That’s not what I mean and you know it.”
“Just drive in silence like you promised me in the beginning.”
“Fine,” he mutters bitterly. “That’s not silence.”
He growls low in his throat and I smirk to myself, happy that I’ve hit him where it stings.
“We really don’t get on anymore, do we?” I’ve been thinking about it the entire journey here and it’s true. We just can’t seem to click like we used to. We’re both always doing something to piss the other off.
“Nope.” He switches off the engine and turns to face me in the darkness. Leroy’s large home is in the distance; it really is only a few streets from my own.
“I wonder why. I used to really like you.” This has him smiling. “You still like me.”