She’d been afraid of that. No, that wouldn’t do. The thing had to be done right. Very well, then, once she and Logan were wed they’d consummate the marriage. Only once, of course, to make the thing legal—
“There are other reasons to consummate too, aside from that.”
Dear God, did he actually want to discuss the other reasons? Wasn’t the whole business nerve-wracking enough without having to reflect on it beforehand?
“Are you eager to share my bed, Juliana?” His low, husky voice brushed against her nerve endings. “Because I find myself very eager for our wedding night.”
Eager? Juliana’s cheeks went hot. The thought of sharing a bed with Logan Blair made her feel…
She didn’t know how it made her feel, aside from strange—a touch fluttery in the belly, and oddly breathless. It was worrying, to say the least. If she couldn’t even think about it without her wits scattering, how did she propose to do it?
“You don’t need to look so worried. It won’t be as bad as all that.” He gave her a teasing smile. “There’s even a chance you’ll find the whole thing…pleasurable.”
Juliana’s eyes widened. Pleasurable? My goodness, was he flirting with her?
Her gaze caught on his curved lips, and once again the memory of his mouth on hers overwhelmed her, making her stomach leap. If the rest of it was anything like his kiss, she might find it pleasurable, indeed. She wasn’t sure if that made it better, or worse. “I daresay you’re right, and there’s not a thing to worry about. Why, I’m sure it’ll be over before it’s hardly begun.”
Logan choked back a laugh. “Fuilteach ifrinn, lass.”
She stared at him, puzzled. What had she said? More to the point, what had he just said in reply? At this rate she was going to have to learn Gaelic.
“For my own part,” he added with a slow smile. “I hope it lasts all n—”
“Logan!”
Juliana was burning with curiosity to hear his next words, but she never got the chance. They’d reached the Sassy Lassie’s inn yard, and a young lady with dark hair rushed toward Logan, a welcoming smile on her red lips.
It was the girl from the other day. The one who’d brought Logan the packet of letters.
The one he’d been flirting with.
Juliana had never seen a man leap from the saddle as quickly as Logan did when he saw her running across the inn yard. “Hello, Alison.”
She came barreling toward him, and he caught her just in time to keep her from crashing into him. “Here again after only a week? Why, Logan! Did ye miss me, lad?”
Logan cast an uneasy glance at Juliana. “Well, ah…I’m always happy to see you, Alison, but we came for our letters.”
The girl drew back and pursed her lips in a pout. “Letters! Is that all? How can ye be so cruel? One of these days I’m going to throw ye over for a man with a warmer heart, Logan Blair!” She slapped him lightly on the arm, and her pretty pout dissolved into a smile even more alluring than her sulk had been.
Juliana sat frozen atop her horse, an unpleasant weight settling on her chest as she watched the girl tease and flirt with him.
She was young—not more than eighteen or so—with abundant, shining raven hair piled in an untidy knot atop her head. Her translucent skin shone like a pearl, and she had the widest, most thickly lashed blue eyes Juliana had ever seen.
The beauty of the girl’s eyes didn’t seem to be lost on Logan. He was looking down at her with a smile unlike any Juliana had seen on his face before. He looked as if he’d been asleep all this time, and had only awoken now, when this beautiful girl rushed into his arms.
Juliana quickly averted her eyes, aware she’d been staring at the two of them. She slowly dismounted, unsure what to do next. Courtesy demanded she wait for Logan to introduce her, but he was far too busy gazing admiringly at the girl’s smiling lips and generous curves to remember his manners. At least, that was how it appeared to Juliana.
All at once, she wished herself anywhere but here.
Was this ravishing girl the reason Logan hadn’t wanted to marry her? Was he in love with her? It looked as if the girl was besotted with him, but while there was clearly admiration and affection in his gaze, if he felt anything deeper, his expression didn’t betray it.
Not that it mattered to her if Logan did love the girl, Juliana thought dully. Once he’d served his purpose in England he’d return to Scotland quickly enough. This girl could have him all to herself then, with Juliana’s compliments.
It was nothing to her what he did.
She straightened her shoulders and went to move past them, courtesy be damned, but before she could disappear through the entryway of the inn, Logan caught her arm. “Wait, Lady Juliana. I want to introduce you to Miss Alison McLaren. Alison here is Fergus’s eldest daughter. The Sassy Lassie is named after her. Alison, this is Lady Juliana Bernard. She’s…well, she’s…she’s the Duke of Blackmore’s friend, visiting here from Surrey.”
Well, how very odd. It must have slipped Logan’s mind Juliana was also his betrothed.
The girl dipped into a hasty curtsy, her flirtatious smile replaced by a curious one. “How do you do, my lady? You’re quite a way from Surrey, aren’t you?”
The girl’s smile was friendly, and she spoke cheerfully enough, but Juliana’s own smile felt as if it were frozen to her lips. “How do you do?” She returned the girl’s curtsy, but she didn’t linger. “I’m pleased to meet you, Miss McLaren, but if you’ll excuse me, I’ll go and see if your father has any letters for me.”
Logan’s fingers tightened around her arm, but Juliana freed herself from his grip with a subtle tug. He was welcome to stand here in the inn yard and flirt with Alison McLaren if he liked, but she didn’t have to stay here and watch it.
She could feel his gaze on her back as she walked away, but she disappeared through the inn’s doorway without turning around.
There weren’t many people about, but Juliana saw a man in the dining room dragging a damp cloth across the bar, and she recognized him at once as Fergus McLaren. “I beg your pardon, Mr. McLaren, but do you have any letters here for Lady Juliana Bernard?”
He looked up from the bar, and his furry eyebrows shot up. “Lady who?”
“Lady Juliana Bernard, Mr. McLaren. Surely that name must be familiar to you? I’m the English lady Logan Blair warned you about. The lady you were meant to keep away from Castle Kinross.”
He ran a grimy sleeve across his forehead. “Are ye now?”
“Indeed. As it happened, I found the castle in spite of you.”
He took her in from the top of her head to the tips of her boots, and a grin rose to his lips. “Did ye now? How did ye manage that, lass?”
She shrugged. “It was simple enough. I saw Logan leave the inn and I followed him.”
Fergus seemed mightily amused by that. He slapped a hand down on the bar, cackling. “And what did Mr. Logan Blair do when ’e found ye sneaking after ’im?”
“There wasn’t much he could do, aside from take me to Castle Kinross with him. He wasn’t at all pleased about it, if that’s what you’re asking.”
Fergus cackled even harder. “Aye, I bet ’e wasn’t, at that. Ye English lassies are wily ones. All right then, Lady Juliana Bernard. Ye just wait ’ere, and I’ll fetch the letters for ye.”
He shuffled off, still chuckling, and Juliana wandered over to the window to wait. Logan was still talking with Alison McLaren in the yard. What was the girl saying to him, to put such an amused smile on his face? He was so wholly absorbed by her he didn’t even seem to notice Juliana had disappeared. She turned her back on them with an irritated huff. It looked as if she’d have to fetch the castle’s letters, too, since Logan was too preoccupied to do it himself.
“Here ye are, my lady. There’s a few here fer the duke, and one fancy one on fine paper fer you.” Fergus
handed the letters over with a sly wink. “Nothing but the finest paper fer yer ladyship, eh?”
Juliana snatched the letters from him, but Fergus didn’t seem offended by her rudeness. He only cackled again, and shook his head. “Wily, and sassy, too. Logan’ll have ’is hands full with this one.”
He went back to his work. Juliana placed Fitz’s letters safely in the pocket of her riding skirt, and wandered out into the hallway to read hers.
It was postmarked from Bath, and Lord Arthur’s crest was stamped into the dark green wax. Juliana stared down at it, her stomach suddenly in knots. Lord Arthur had said he’d write if her father’s health made a drastic change for the better, or for the worse.
Except there was no better for her father. Not anymore.
Juliana’s hands shook as she slid the tip of her fingernail under the wax and opened the sheet. The letter was brief, but in the few moments it took for her to read the half-dozen lines, her entire world fell apart.
Rapid deterioration…father very ill…leaving Bath for Surrey today…
Come at once.
Lord Arthur must have written the letter just after she’d arrived in Inverness. She stared down at it, the words and lines blurring in front of her eyes. Then she shoved it into her pocket and ran out the front door of the inn.
Logan turned when she came out into the yard. He took one look at her and the smile Alison McLaren had put on his face vanished. “Juliana? What’s happened?”
Juliana didn’t answer him. She hardly heard him. Lord Arthur’s words were echoing in her head, and her only thought was she must get back to Castle Kinross as quickly as she could.
“Juliana!” Logan caught her by the shoulders as she raced across the inn yard and held her still, his blue eyes dark with worry as he gazed down at her. “Juliana, what is it? Tell me what’s wrong.”
“My father,” she whispered, the words torn from a throat suddenly gone dry with panic. “I must return to England at once.”
Chapter Fifteen
Juliana didn’t say a word on the way from Inverness back to Castle Kinross, but Logan could see she was quietly panicking. Each time her face began to crumple or she bit her lip to hold back tears, his chest cracked open wider.
It was torture, watching her struggle with her grief.
She hadn’t shown him the letter she’d received from Lord Arthur, but it was plain the news from England wasn’t good. Logan didn’t know what to say to her, or how to comfort her. All he could do was stay close beside her as they rushed through the longest ride he’d ever taken.
When they arrived at the castle they found Fitz pacing the entryway, waiting for them. Logan was too distracted by Juliana to notice it, but later he’d wonder why he didn’t find this odd at the time. Fitz never waited unless he had a reason for it. Logan should have realized then something momentous was about to happen.
“Logan, Lina. I’m glad you’re both here. I need to speak…” Fitz trailed off when he caught sight of Juliana’s face. “Lina? What’s the matter? You’re as white as a ghost.”
“I’ve had a letter from Lord Arthur.” Juliana pulled the letter from her pocket and held it out to Fitz, her hand shaking.
Fitz took it, but he didn’t look at it. He kept his gaze on Juliana’s face. “Your father. Is he—”
“He’s had a turn for the worse. Lord Arthur writes to say he’s taken him back to Surrey. They’re likely there, even now.” Juliana grasped Fitz’s hand, her face going even whiter. “What if he…what if I’m too late, Fitzwilliam?”
“No. You’re not to think like that. Do you understand me, Lina?” Fitz’s voice was firm, but he gathered Juliana against him and gently stroked her back.
Logan stood there, his chest tight as he watched his brother offer Juliana the comfort he longed to give her. Even as he cursed his own selfishness, his jealousy was like a fist squeezing his heart.
Fitz held Juliana for long, quiet moments. When she raised her face from his chest, the tears she’d fought on the ride from Inverness were streaking her cheeks. “I’ll leave for England at once—tomorrow, if we can manage it.”
Fitz nodded. “I’ll see to everything. Go up to your bedchamber, Lina. I’ll send Emilia to you, and one of the maids to help you pack your things.”
“Thank you.” Juliana started for the stairs, but just when Logan was certain she’d disappear to her room without a word to him, she paused. “Mr. Blair?”
Logan practically leapt across the space between them. “Aye. What can I do?”
She’d dried her cheeks, but her green eyes were still swimming with tears. “You’ll speak to Fitzwilliam about…our plans? You’ll need to warn Stokes, as well, and tell him we’re leaving for Surrey as soon as we can.”
Logan ached to gather her close, but he only nodded. “Yes. I’ll make all the arrangements.”
To Logan’s surprise, she took his hand. “Thank you.” A grateful smile drifted across her trembling lips, then she turned for the stairs.
Logan and Fitz watched her until she reached the landing and went down the hallway toward her bedchamber. “Christ,” Logan murmured, once she was out of sight. “I hope it’s not too late.”
Fitz’s face was somber. “So do I.”
Logan drew in a deep breath. “I need to speak with you privately, brother.”
“What a coincidence. I need to speak to you as well. Shall we go to the library? I need a drink.”
Logan followed Fitz down the hallway to the library and closed the door firmly behind him. Fitz went straight to the sideboard, sloshed some whisky into two tumblers, then joined Logan, who was seated in a chair before the fireplace.
They didn’t speak until they’d both tossed back half the whisky in their glasses, then Logan placed his tumbler on the table in front of him, and met Fitz’s eyes. “Juliana won’t have to make the journey back to England alone.”
Fitz’s eyebrows rose. “No?”
“No. I’m going with her. I’m marrying her, Fitz.”
For a split second, Fitz’s face remained blank, but then his mouth twisted, and a chuckle escaped his lips. The chuckle deepened and swelled until Fitz gave into it, and threw his head back in a hearty laugh.
Logan’s mouth dropped open. He wasn’t sure what reaction he’d expected, but it wasn’t this. “What the devil is so funny?”
“You, Logan. You’re what’s so funny.” Fitz wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes. “Jesus. I’ve been waiting for days to hear you say that, and now today, of all days, you tell me you’re marrying Lina.”
Logan stared at him. “What difference does it make what day it is? This is what you wanted, isn’t it?”
“It’s what I wanted, all right, and if you’d made the decision a day earlier, I would have been able to say I knew you’d marry her all along, and my faith in you was totally justified. As it is…well, let’s just say what’s done can’t be undone.”
“Well, what the devil’s been done?” Logan didn’t have the faintest idea what his brother was going on about, but he didn’t like the sound of it.
Fitz didn’t answer right away. His brows drew together, as if he were pondering the best way to explain himself, but when he did speak, his words only added to Logan’s confusion. “You know, I never asked to be the laird. Never wanted to be either, if you want the truth.”
Logan gaped at him. “What does that mean?”
“Never asked to be duke, either, come to that. I certainly never asked to be both at once. God knows being a duke is enough trouble for one man.”
“Enough tr…for God’s sake, Fitz, what are you talking about?”
“But then I guess our uncle must have known that, since he never intended for me to become the Laird of Clan Kinross.”
Logan stiffened. “He left the land to you. Whoever owns the land is laird. Our uncle knew that well
enough.”
Fitz shrugged. “Yes, I expect he did, but then he also knew the Kinross land wasn’t part of the entail. It belonged to our grandmother on our mother’s side, as I’m sure you know. It became our grandfather’s when they married, and then our uncle’s when he became duke, but it was never part of the Blackmore dukedom.”
“So? What does it matter? The land is yours now. That makes you the laird.”
“Ah, but as I said, I don’t want to be laird. Never did. You do, though, don’t you, Logan? Want to be Laird of Clan Kinross, I mean.”
“You know damn well I do.” As far as Logan was concerned, he was now and always would be Laird of Clan Kinross, regardless of who owned the land. He’d been raised to act as laird—had expected to lead the clan since he was old enough to balance on his father’s knee, the law be damned.
The law might say he wasn’t laird, but the law couldn’t erase a man’s history.
“Yes, I do know that.” Fitz’s tone remained casual, but he was watching Logan closely. “But there’s something you don’t know. You see, our uncle always intended for you to have the land, Logan. He left it to me, yes, but I can dispose of it if I wish, to whomever I choose. Why do you think I came to Castle Kinross in the first place?”
Logan’s mouth opened, then closed again. He stared at Fitz, too stunned to say a word.
“It’s a fair trade, really, once you consider it rationally. Our father’s eldest son in exchange for a large parcel of land. The Duke of Blackmore gets to raise his heir, and Gordon Blair’s second son gets the land and becomes the rightful Laird of Clan Kinross.”
“A trade?” No, it wasn’t possible. His father would have told him.
Fitz sipped at his whisky, watching Logan over the rim of his glass. “I didn’t think you could have known. If you had, you’d have been pleased to see me arrive at Castle Kinross. I’m surprised our father never said anything to you about it, but then he and our uncle didn’t much care for one another. Maybe he thought the duke would go back on his word. Then again, our father did raise you as if he knew you’d become laird someday.”
To Wed A Wild Scot Page 18