by Andrea Joan
“Okay.” See, that was much more concise.
“What do you want from me in this, Sky?”
“What do you mean?”
“What I mean is, am I just some quick itch you want to scratch? You want to fuck me whenever you’re in need of a fix, or are you looking for something more than that?”
If I hadn’t been looking in those totally hypnotic gray eyes of his when he asked that completely crass question, I would have thought he was just trying to insult me. But I can tell he honestly wants to know. It seems unfair that he is asking me that question while rubbing his fingers against my bare thigh, though. Is he trying to confuse me?
“Well, what do you want from me?” I ask.
His palm stills on my leg and he applies a slight amount of pressure. “Don’t do that. I asked you what you wanted.”
I absentmindedly start tracing his knuckles lightly with my fingers thinking only one thing. “What if I answer wrong? Then you won’t want to be around me anymore.” I can tell by the pitying look on his face that I just said that out loud. Shit, shit, shit.
“Christ, Skylar. I’m not looking for a way out here. I just want to set some ground rules. I’ve had one relationship in my life and it didn’t end well. In fact, the ending was so fucking devastating that for years now I’ve just been sticking my dick in disposable pussy over and over, hoping it would just help me forget. I don’t even know if I’m capable of anything deeper than sex anymore. It sounds messed up, I know, but I’m trying to be honest because if you tell me here and now that you are looking for more than a meaningless fuck, I’ll try. For you, I will try. But any attempt I make will come with a whole lot of issues you would have to deal with, and I don’t think you want or need that burden.”
He’s been in a relationship. That seems to be the only thing he said that is sticking with me. It’s not that it’s surprising; the surprising thing is that he has only had one and that one scarred him. And that one is one I would have to compete with. I want so badly to know more about what I’m up against, but I know if I ask he’ll pull away or snap at me like last night. I know he won’t hurt me, and knowing that makes me unafraid to ask the question, but one thing I’ve learned about Liam is that he comes with a Proceed with Caution stamp directly on his perfectly gorgeous face. So I have to pick the right time to start to wade into the already murky waters of relationships past, and this is not it.
But I have to say something.
“So, my options are a relationship that comes with some baggage, or to be disposable pussy. Aww.” My hands fly to my cheeks. “It’s like you’re my real-life Prince Charming,” I say, biting my lip.
“This isn’t a joke, Sky.” His tone is sullen as he grabs my wrist, wrapping his fingers around it. I’m sure he can feel my pulse start to quicken. “And I wouldn’t call it baggage. You can get rid of baggage, remove it, unpack it, clean it up and make it disappear. I’m filth. I’ll stain you. I’m rude, selfish, territorial, possessive. Fucking controlling. I have a quick trigger temper that is practically impossible to control. I’m a fuck-up on my best day. On my worst, I’m completely destructive.”
“You can’t stain something that’s already dirty.” The words come out in a whisper and I’m not sure if he even heard, but I wish that I hadn’t said them in the first place.
“What?” he asks.
I roll down the window a bit, needing some fresh air and to clear the condensation off the windows. This is it. The perfect opening. The most appropriate time to tell him the parts of my life that I left out on the plane ride here. About my mother, about me. I could lay it all out for him so he can see that I’m not as pure and perfect as he seems to think I am. But his words from before keep repeating in my head. “You are intelligent and beautiful and incredibly strong. That is how I see you…”
I just want to be seen like that for a little while longer.
I take his hand and thread my fingers through his. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that I don’t believe you are those things, and that even if you are, the good in you outweighs the bad, and well, I like you. A lot actually.” Enough to let him destroy me just a little bit more.
“Sky, you don’t know what you’re—”
A flashing light from outside the car window grabs our attention, interrupting Liam and practically blinding me. I look out the now clear windows and see two people taking pictures with a camera aimed right at me. Looks like our time is up.
“Motherfuckers. Sky, when I get out, scoot over into the passenger seat.”
“What? Why? I can drive us out of here. You don’t have to go out there, Liam.”
He throws the door open and exits the car before leaning his head back in. He’s holding on to the door frame so tightly I’m afraid he might bend it. “Don’t argue with me, just move over.” His tone is low and demanding and sends shivers up my spine. There is obviously no use in arguing.
He slams the door and slowly walks around the front of the car while I scurry over into the passenger seat, careful not to give the paparazzi and growing crowd a free show of my ass. I see they are trying to fire off questions at me, but between being in the car and the sound of my heart thumping hard in my chest, I can’t hear any of it.
With every step Liam takes closer to the people with cameras and the casual onlookers, his jaw clenches tighter and tighter. The muscles in his arm constrict the harder his fingers curl into his palm.
“Come on, Liam. Just get in the car,” I quietly murmur. I’m trying to duck my head in my hands so they don’t get a clear shot of me, but I can’t take my eyes off of Liam. If he flips out I need to bring him back. I let out a breath when he reaches the driver’s door and pulls it open.
“Hey, Skylar, what were you two doing in the car? You into screwing in public now?”
Okay, that question I definitely heard. Liam’s eyes go dark and he bows his head so I can’t see them anymore. His chest is heaving and his nostrils are flaring. I swear I’m seeing true anger manifest before me.
“Skylar, we heard Cassius Logue was here earlier. Are you with both guys?”
“Liam. Look at me.”
He does, but says nothing. The look on his face breaks me more than it scares me. The anguish, the hurt, the rage, I see it all pass through his features, almost as if it physically pains him to not go after the pricks asking the questions.
“Get in the car. I want to go home.” I’m shocked I’m able to keep my voice steady, hiding any hurt or embarrassment I may be feeling because I know it will make him lose it. “Don’t forget you work for me. I’m telling you I want to leave. Take me home. Now.”
I hate myself the moment I have to throw this job in his face, but it’s the only thing I can think of to stop him from going after those assholes. Thank god it works. He all but launches himself into the car, slamming the door so hard that I’m surprised it didn’t break my window. The engine roars to life, and before I can even blink he backs the car up and peels out of the parking lot, leaving the crowd behind.
“Liam.” I place my hand gently on his arm, surprised by the heat coming off his skin. He quickly jerks away from my touch as if I’ve burned him instead of the other way around.
“Don’t.”
That’s it. That’s all he says. One word, a single command, and the weight of it is crushing me with its finality. The whole drive home I remain silent, somehow managing not to cry in front of him, but with each passing second I actually find myself wanting to fight with him. Fight for us. He will fight for me. We were getting somewhere before we had a damn audience, and then that moment was taken from us. I’m so fucking sick of having my life dictated and controlled and ruined by everyone. The paparazzi, the media, directors, my agent, my father.
By the time he pulls into my garage, shuts the car off, and all but stomps into the house, I’ve finally reached majorly pissed-off status. And it’s about time. I’m not weak, I have a voice, and it’s time I finally start speaking up.
With
my resolve final to confront this head-on, I get out of the car and head into my house. I hear the loud thumping the minute I walk in and know exactly where he is. Taking the steps down to my gym two at a time, I stop the second I hit the last one and watch as he pounds the heavy bag mercilessly. No shirt. No gloves. No control.
“Liam,” I call out to him as I walk further into the gym. He doesn’t even spare me a glance, but I know he hears me because when I call out his name again I see the muscle in his jaw twitch. One thing I hate more than being shushed is being outright ignored. I’m starting to learn I deserve more, and how ironic that the one person who is starting to make me believe that is the one currently ignoring me.
I walk right up to the bag as it swings from his hits and grab hold of it, hugging the thing in an attempt to get it to still, so that he finally has to stop and listen to me. In retrospect, seeing as I’m now on my ass, that idea was probably not the smartest one I’ve ever had.
“What the fuck, Sky? Are you okay?” Liam rushes over to me, grabbing my elbows and lifting me off the floor.
“Aside from being a little embarrassed, yeah, I’m fine,” I assure him, brushing my hands down my dress.
“Embarrassed?! Jesus Christ.” he barks out, his hold on my elbow tightening. “What the hell were you thinking? Don’t ever get in front of a bag when someone is hitting it. You could have been seriously fucking hurt.”
“Well, I know that now obviously.”
“Fuck. Are you sure you’re okay? Let me look at you.” The concern in his voice softens my anger at him.
“Liam, I landed on my butt, you really want to take a look?” The slight twitch of his lips has me realizing how stupid that question was. “Never mind, don’t answer that. I wouldn’t have to go to such drastic measures to get your attention if you would have stopped to talk to me when I called your name.”
Just like that, any trace of concern seems to disappear and he is back to being pissed off, and now so am I.
“I don’t want to fucking talk to you right now,” he says.
“Well, too bad. I want to finish what we were discussing in the car. About us.”
“Skylar, there is no us. What happened in the car was a mistake. You were right. We need to forget it ever happened.”
“That’s bullshit.”
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Less than half an hour ago you told me you would try. For me, you would try. Then we have a little run-in with the cockblock-arazzi and now you want to throw in the towel. I thought you had more balls than that, O’Connor. I also didn’t figure you for a liar.”
“Stop pushing me baby. I’m not in the fucking mood,” he warns.
“No,” I say, jabbing my finger into his hard chest. “Not until you tell me what the hell changed.”
“You really don’t want to know the answer to that. Now march your ass back up those stairs and get out of my face.”
“Don’t tell me what I want. I’m asking, aren’t I? And I’m not leaving until you answer the question. I’m not scared of you, Liam, so stop trying to intimidate me.”
“YOU SHOULD BE FUCKING SCARED!” he yells, and the sudden change in the volume of his voice causes me to jump, but not out of fear. Liam starts to crowd me, backing me up until I hit the wall behind me. He braces his hands on either side of my body and gets right in my face. I wait for the fear to settle in, like it does when I’m with Carl, but I feel nothing. In the deepest part of my soul, I know Liam would never hurt me, and that thought keeps me from breaking eye contact with him. Because I know the second I do he will think he’s right, that I’m scared. “You should be fucking terrified,” he says again. “Do you know what I wanted to do to those fuckers that were shoving a camera at your car? What I wanted to do to Logue? I wanted to hurt them. I needed to hurt them worse than they were hurting you. With every disgusting question they hurled your way I pictured breaking another bone. Legs. Arms. Hands. Nose. I wanted to see them bleed. Do you think those are the thoughts of a fucking sane man, Skylar?”
“But you didn’t.” I cup his face in my hands, but he jerks his head away, leaving my hands to fall back down. “You got in the car. Having those thoughts and actually acting on them are two very different things, Liam.”
“I got in the car because you asked me to, and you know what? I fucking hate that I got in.” His fist wraps around my hair, tugging slightly so that I’m even closer to his face than before. I’m panting now, my adrenaline spiking. With irritation, with lust. I can’t decide if I want to slap him or kiss him. “You want to know something else, Sky? Part of me even hates you for asking me to.”
“I don’t believe you,” I tell him with every ounce of conviction I possess.
A deep growl comes from his throat. That’s the only warning I get before he crashes his lips to mine. His grip on my hair strengthens as he basically fucks my mouth. His tongue exploring my mouth like he has to taste every part of me, his teeth nipping at my lips; the sting a welcome addition to my pleasure. I grab his hips and pull him closer to me, close enough that I can feel his erection digging into my stomach. He moans into my mouth at the contact, puts his hands under my thighs, and lifts me so that my legs wrap around him, then slams me back against the wall.
“Fuck,” he groans, ripping his mouth away from mine as he starts kissing and sucking down my throat until he reaches the tendon at the base of my neck. The second he bites down I feel him shred my panties from my body.
“Liam, shit. Don’t stop.” I’m so desperate for release at this point that I’m begging.
Seconds later, I feel his hot breath trail down my skin until it reaches my ear. “Tell me, baby, how wet are you? Wet enough to take my cock?”
I can’t even form a coherent sentence right now and he is asking me questions.
“Skylar, fucking answer me.” He rocks into me, the friction of his zipper against my clit almost causing me to come.
“Y-Yes. Just fuck me. Please, Liam.”
His lips are back on mine and I hear the faint sound of a buckle and a zipper before I feel the tip of his dick teasing my entrance. Holy hell. This is really about to happen.
Tearing his lips away from mine he says, “You better be fucking sure about this, Sky. There’s no going back.”
“Huhhhm,” is all I manage to get out because the only thing I can concentrate on is the sensation of his dick so close to being inside me. I try and move my hips down so he sinks deeper, but his grip around my waist tightens and stills me.
“Jesus, fuck, you’re soaking my cock,” he rasps, his body shuddering with the need to lose control. “Stop moving. Look at me and answer the question or I won’t fuck you.” He groans when I wiggle just a fraction more over him. “On second thought, maybe I will, I just won’t let you come.” I snap my eyes open at the threat. “Tell me you’re sure about this, Sky. This will change everything.”
I bite his lower lip, sucking it hard into my mouth before I release it. “I’m sure.”
Dropping his forehead to mine he says, “You want me? You trust me to take care of you?”
The muscles in my pussy begin to contract, trying to get him inside me, causing Liam to slide in a little more.
“Yes, Liam. I do. I swear.”
With that last promise, he slams into me. Hard. The size of him shocks me, and it takes me a second to fully stretch around him. I can already tell I may not fully get used to him this time, but it feels so amazing that I don’t even care.
“Fuck. Sky, you feel so fucking good.”
He thrusts into me again and again. There is no rhythm or gentleness to the onslaught, and all I can do is hold on to the back of his neck as he fucks me relentlessly against the wall with wild abandon. I’m lost to the overwhelming ecstasy, and the only words I manage to get out are more and harder. At some point his fingers find the strap of my dress and he pulls it down, tearing it from my body and freeing my breasts. Thank god I went without a bra today otherwise not one item of clothi
ng would have made it out unscathed.
Before I have time to even mourn my dress, Liam’s wet, warm mouth is wrapped around my nipple, sucking it into his mouth. Fuck that dress. He moves to my other breast, licking and sucking and nipping as he continues to pound into me. When he bites down on my nipple I scream out his name, lost to the sensation of pain and pleasure.
“Sky. Shit, fuck. Please tell me you’re fucking close,” he begs before he’s back to kissing me again. I don’t even have a chance to answer before his calloused fingers press down on my clit.
I come so hard I feel my thighs squeeze around his waist as my pussy tightens around his cock.
“Sky, I need to—pu-shit, I can’t stop. Fuck,” He slams his fist against the wall next to my head then I feel him release inside me.
Liam’s knees give way and he sinks to the floor, taking me with him. We’re both panting, trying to catch our breath. I hold his head against my chest and relish the feel of his dick still moving inside me. I’m not sure how long we sit this way, and I would almost be worried I killed him or something except I can feel his heart beating hard against my hand.
“Liam, you didn’t, like, pass out on me or anything, did you?”
I hear him chuckle before he lifts his head from the crook of my neck. “I’m not sure, sweetheart but it’s possible. I think I saw God for a second.”
“Oh yeah, what did he look like?”
“An awful lot like your tits.”
“You’re a pig,” I scold him but I can’t even attempt to hide my smile. Liam grabs the back of my head and brings me in for a hard kiss as he pulls out of me, leaving me feeling empty. He backs himself up so he’s sitting against the wall, and he brings me with him so I’m resting against his chest.
“I didn’t use a condom.”
“I can kind of tell by your cum dripping down my thighs.”
“Fuck.” He groans as if in pain. “Don’t say shit like that to me right now. It’ll just make me want to fuck you again, and I really need to at least get my vision back fully before that happens,” he says, scrubbing his hand over his face.