"Okay, what are we looking at?"
They could have made fun of me, or laughed in my face, but they made me feel welcome, like I was meant to be there, and when the planning began again, they didn't talk down to me.
"This is where we believe the drakes are congregating," said Callum, tapping the map. "This is where the swarm centers and there is a cave network here stretching out over a hundred miles. That would be enough to house them."
"Picking on the individual clouds of them, when and where they show up, we can never make any real dent in their numbers," MacKenzie explained. "But if we hit them where they live, then we might have a chance."
"If we can find a way to hit them hard enough," added Duncan.
"But..." This sounded like lunacy. "You said, one dragon could take on maybe a dozen. How can four of you take on a thousand of them?"
"There are still some holes in the plan," admitted Duncan.
"We're working on it," said Callum.
"At least we can take a lot of them with us," growled Alistair.
As I listened, the horror of what was being suggested hit me. This was a suicide mission, and I would have bet all the money I had that it would take place after we had “mated”. Once they knew their race had a future in me, then they were free to go sacrifice themselves to secure that future. There was no way in hell I was allowing them to go through with this.
"No."
MacKenzie looked up from the map. "No?"
"You can't do this. I won't allow it."
"It's not your decision to make."
"I'm making it mine."
"It's the only way."
"I won't allow you to sacrifice yourselves to protect me!" I practically screamed.
Duncan shook his head. "Well, someone thinks a lot of herself."
"It's not just about you," said Callum. "In fact, it's only about you tangentially. This is about the future of the dragon race..."
"Which is going to be well-served by the deaths of four Dragon Shifters?" I felt this argument had a strong logic but MacKenzie shook his head.
"By then, we will have already mated with you. Our contribution to the continuation of our race will be at an end."
It was like a slap in the face and my stomach clenched. “Is that all it is to you?" I felt hurt as much as angry.
"Of course not.” The violence in MacKenzie's voice made it clear that he was angry at just the suggestion. "You know how we feel about you, so please don't dismiss it. There is no question we would rather stay with you and live and raise our offspring, but protecting you is more important. The prime objective. Surely, you can see that. With luck—and a little forward planning—one of us will survive to show you how to raise a Dragon Shifter child. Although, most of it should come naturally."
"You're taking an awful lot for granted." Which was unfortunate, because I would never agree to it. "If you insist on killing yourselves in this insane plan, then I'm going back home. Right now…today.”
It was a hard line to draw, but there it was. The only thing worse than falling for four dragons was losing them all. I couldn’t let myself get even one centimeter closer if they were so cavalier about leaving me and this earth forever. My heart would shatter.
The guys looked at each other sheepishly, unable to meet my gaze, and I felt a queasy sensation in my stomach. There was something else. Something they weren’t telling me.
“What?” I demanded, flicking a glance between them.
“I’m sorry, Ella," said MacKenzie, still unable to look directly at me. "We all talked about it, and I know we’d told you differently, but things have changed. We cannot risk letting you go home now. The drakes know about you, they have your scent. You would never be safe. Nor would your family, your friends, those kids you look after. Anyone close to you would be at risk. That is the drakes' way.”
His words rocked me back on my heels and sent me reeling. "What about my life back home?” I finally managed through numb lips.
They couldn't answer.
I could feel my world unraveling before me, spooling away into a miasma of vague memories and unclear dreams. Was that to be the fate of my real life? If I could never see my mom or my sister again, how would I recover? How would they?
What had these people done to me?
"We're so sorry, love,” Duncan said, parroting MacKenzie. “We didn’t know.”
But I barely even looked at him because everything had changed. When it had been my choice, then I could have imagined myself staying here—maybe visiting home from time to time. But now the choice had been taken from me, the walls seemed to close in. This castle had once again become my prison.
"At least here we can protect you," Callum muttered.
But words and promises were no use to me now. With tears rising in my eyes and a sick feeling laying hold of my stomach, I ran from the dining hall, racing up the stairs towards my room.
My room.
More like my cell.
I rushed through the door and slammed it behind me as sobs wracked my body. No Christmas with my family. No bawdy jokes and silly phone calls with my sister. No long, heartfelt talks with my overprotective mother. And the very thought they might be in danger? Had me wrecked.
I’d gone from heaven to hell in a matter of eight hours…and something told me it was only going to get worse.
Chapter 15
I wasn’t sure how long had passed, an hour or more, but my tears had finally subsided. A gentle tap on the door, so quiet I almost didn't notice it, made me pick my head up out of my damp pillow.
“Please, go away.”
The gentle tap sounded again.
Of course, the tapper had heard me but he apparently wasn't going to take any notice. As the handle turned, the door opened and Alistair's head emerged around it, followed by the rest of Alistair.
Just the sight of him stole the fire from inside me. For some reason, I'd assumed that it was Duncan at the door, or maybe MacKenzie. Alistair would have been my last guess and I wondered if he had been sent by the others for that reason…the element of surprise. Perhaps they thought I would forgive him because of his tragic past.
They were wrong.
"I asked you to go away."
Alistair nodded without speaking as he closed the door behind him. He wandered across to the window that looked out across several hundred acres of sky, still saying nothing. I wanted to say, “If you've got something to say then say it”. But something about Alistair forbid such a course. He would speak in his own time, he would not be rushed.
"I wouldn't change it."
The words finally came, as if dredged up from the very depths of his soul.
"I mean, obviously I would change…the final outcome.” He couldn't bring himself to talk about the death of his mate. "But the time we had together—I wouldn't change any of it. Even knowing how it would end and how much it would hurt me. I would still want her as part of my life. It was worth the pain to know her. To love her."
I swallowed the sudden lump in my throat, the last of my righteous fury fading as I sat up straighter. “What was her name?" I dared to ask.
He paused for a long moment and I wondered how long it had been since he had spoken her name. "Catriona."
I nodded, waiting for him to speak again.
“I'm not going to compare our stories—our situations—but... Life doesn't always go as you planned." He paused. "I remember when I brought her here to meet the others. There was a deal of muttering that I had chosen a woman who was already paired up with Dragon Shifters from another clan, rather than someone we could all be with. But then they met her."
A half-smile of recollection played around Alistair's lips.
"She won them over. I took her up to the battlements and we sat up there in the cold, a blanket wrapped around us, listening to the wind, and she told me that the future of the Dragon Shifter race didn't really matter." He shook his head. "I told her not to say that in front of MacKenzie, and she laughed.
She had a wonderful laugh, like the peal of a church bell. She said individuals were what mattered—if the race must die then let it die with happy individuals, living for themselves and each other. The funny thing was, she was right, in her way. You can toil away to save a race but if you're not doing it for the individuals then what are you even saving? But if you love the ones you love, and you fight for the ones you love, then you'll save the dragon race one individual at a time without even meaning to do it." His head dropped to his chest as he spoke. "You would have liked her, I think. She would have liked you, but... She liked everybody."
"She had other mates?" I was still fighting to understand the world of the Dragon Shifters, and this part of it more than any other.
"Two others," he said sadly, his eyes now fixed on the floor. "I should have stayed in touch with them—we had this thing in common, perhaps we could have helped each other through it. But it was too painful. To see them was to see her, and to remember the times we spent together. I'm sure they felt it as much as I did, but I'm not sure it would have divided up the pain, just intensified it."
"And she had an egg?"
His eyes flicked to the floor again, then back to me. “It may seem cold, biologically. We all mate with the female and so, even though the egg will only be fathered by one of us, the child belongs to all of us. And, of course, we continue to mate, and so another becomes a father. And so on. But we're all fathers from that first egg—not biologically, but..." he fought for a word that didn't sound like a bad romantic cliché, "emotionally," he finally said, failing in his search. "Biologically speaking, I have never sired an offspring and so I am able to do so with another female. And yet I have lost a child."
"I'm so sorry."
"Like I said, life doesn't always work out the way you plan it. You have a choice." And I knew that he meant “you” specifically, as well as generally. "You can live in the past, regretting what might have been—what should have been—or you can move past it." He shook his head, turning to face me fully. "It's not easy. I nearly died in the attempt. But with the help of my brothers, I found a new path, a new normal. Every day is a fresh struggle to stick to it, but every day gets a little easier. And it's worth doing, because life is precious, because it's what I know Catriona would have wanted, and because there is more out there. Life doesn't end because it's not what we planned."
I stood up from the bed and crossed the room, my eyes never leaving him, my face earnest. "Alistair, be honest with me. Am I ever going to see my home, my family, my friends, again?"
He held my gaze and I saw the honest intent in his face. "I don't know. If we can eradicate the drakes, if we can be sure that you are safe..." He petered out. "I can't fairly answer that question. Too many what ifs."
It wasn't the answer I wanted, but I appreciated his honesty. It felt like something solid in the midst of a storm-tossed sea.
"Thank you. I'm sorry I didn't get to meet Catriona. And I'm sorry... I'm just sorry."
But Alistair shook his head. "Don't be. She was the greatest gift that life had ever given me. And then, after I saw you last night, injured by the drakes,” he spat the word angrily, “I knew I was being given another chance at that gift.”
I looked up to meet his gaze, my heart in my throat.
"I know this must be difficult for you, but I want... I need you to know—” He paused, his strong throat working as he swallowed hard. "I would hate to see you go, Ella.”
Without knowing when it happened, I found that I was holding Alistair's hand in mine. My breath suddenly seemed short and my heart was pounding in my ears. We had come so close the other night, now the same feelings were rising up in me again. I stretched up on tiptoes and kissed him.
Chapter 16
Alistair pulled away sharply. I looked up, expecting to see anger in his eyes, but instead I saw the sharp edge of fear. He was afraid of his own feelings, angry at himself for a perceived betrayal. The moment had come to leave behind the saddest memory of his life. But however sad it was, it linked him to the woman he loved, and letting go of that was not easy.
"Alistair?" I held out a hand to him.
He stared at my hand as if it was some alien thing sent to test his resolve. But there was a heat in him as fierce as the heat in me, and it would not be denied. I drew a sharp breath as he grabbed my hand and pulled me roughly to him, crushing my body into his and claiming my mouth in a passionate kiss. I demurred to him, allowing myself to be his, to be putty in his hands.
I knew he was feeling guilty, but he wasn't the only one—just the night before, I had been with Duncan. Maybe this was how dragons did things but I was still human enough to feel bad about it. But those feelings were quickly being burnt away in the sharp heat of my desire for Alistair and this new way of life I was only just coming to understand.
I felt his hands cup my ass cheeks and then I squealed as he picked me up off the floor as if I weighed nothing at all. I locked my legs around his waist and threw my arms about his neck as I kissed him, meeting his fierce passion with my own, feeling his stubble scratch against my face. Unceremoniously, Alistair dumped me on the edge of a table by the wall, his hands running up and down my thighs, his body between my spread legs. I tore open his shirt, sending buttons flying, and ran my hands over the toned muscles of his torso—less expansive than Duncan's but tighter and equally attractive. He grabbed me and dragged me in for a hard kiss before growling in my ear.
“You’re asking for trouble.”
I was wearing a T-shirt without buttons but that didn't stop Alistair from ripping it open, exposing my breasts, heaving with excitement in a lacy bra. Unlike yesterday, this morning I had put on some of the sexier underwear in my wardrobe. Perhaps I had known this was going to happen. Or, perhaps I had just wanted it to. The thrill of having my clothes torn from my body sent me grabbing at Alistair's body once more, desperate to taste his lips, to bite his chin, to drag my nails across his skin, just to touch him. But the guilt still festered—however okay dragons were with this, I had to be true to myself. I, at least, had to be honest.
“I-I want to be honest and tell you…I slept with Duncan last night," I gasped.
Alistair stopped, a bemused half-smile on his face. "That's the worst dirty talk I've ever heard."
"But..."
"We know. We all knew as soon as it happened.”
"You..."
"We're dragons. And a dragon mate should be worshipped like a goddess."
And with that, he pushed me down flat on the table, kissing me and grinding his body against mine. If he had done that a minute before, I wasn't sure if I'd have had the self-control to tell him about Duncan. I could feel him, strong and hard, pressed against the zipper of his pants and hot enough to burn through them. Urgently, I kissed him back. I had done “the right thing” by my own moral code and was now more than happy to subscribe to the dragon's more flexible one, especially if that meant more of Alistair. The feel of him against me was becoming more than I could stand, it was a tease of what was to come and I was done waiting.
I pushed Alistair back from me and he went where I guided without question, straightening up. I went with him, hopping off the edge of the table to stand in front of him. My hands had already found the front of his pants, and by the time my feet touched the floor, I had his belt unbuckled and the buttons undone. In a single swift movement, I yanked pants and underwear down, dropping to my knees as I pulled.
"Oh!" I moaned as Alistair's straining organ sprung free, bobbing up toward my chin. I gaped at it. Alistair's cock extended, with a slight curve, from a neatly trimmed topiary of pubic hair. It looked as long as Duncan's, perhaps not quite as thick, and definitely not as smooth, it was ridged and a pair of pulsing veins twisted about its impressive length, feeding it, making it grow and swell to still greater dimensions. Just the sight stirred something within me, something primal and animal, something that could not wait and would not be denied.
As Alistair kicked off his jeans that ha
d pooled about his feet, I grabbed his shaft, wrapping my fingers as far as they would go about his girth. It seemed to writhe in my grasp like a wild thing, struggling to get away, strong and sinuous beneath my fingers. I dived forward, slathering my tongue from base to tip—I would tame it, break it like a wild stallion.
Without hesitation, I engulfed the smooth, swollen head of Alistair's fiery cock in my mouth and was pleased to hear the growl of arousal rumble in his chest, more harsh and serrated than Duncan, more like a snarl.
With one hand still wrapped around the base of his shaft, I began to pump, hard enough that my fist smacked against the taut muscles of his belly. My other hand began a roving exploration of all of Alistair that was in reach; up the honed muscles of his legs, across his rock hard buns and into the crevice between, up his back, across his abdomen and down between his legs to tug on his balls. I wanted every part of him with a fevered intensity I had never felt before, but I was determined to make him earn it.
Alistair rose to the challenge I set, unflinching as I worked him with mouth and hands. His own hands had been in my hair, clenching it in bunches as I sucked at him, but now I felt them move to my shoulders, guiding me up.
He was ready and I was right there with him, the heat of desire between my legs fast reaching bursting point. Releasing him from my mouth with a pop, I stood, kissing my way up his body as I passed, and still beating furiously at his straining rod with my hand.
We kissed, and I knew he was tasting himself on my lips. I felt his hands unbuttoning my pants and, in my desperate haste, I began to pull them down along with my panties. But before I could take them off, Alistair had stopped me, grabbing my arms in a rough grip. I gasped as he spun me round and bent me over across the table, my breasts flattening out against the hard wood. Keeping one hand firmly on my back to hold me, Alistair stooped and I felt his lips leaving a burning trail of kisses across my ass cheeks and down to my thighs. I whimpered as his fingers danced between my legs, brushing my secret lips, then cried out as he kissed me there, delicately at first and then more roughly.
Kidnapped by the Dragon Harem: A Paranormal Holiday Fantasy Page 10