"You're all right," he whispered in her ear. He slid his arms under hers and took the leather reins. "Grip tightly with your legs, and don't worry, I have hold of you. I won't let you fall."
Malinali gulped air, hoping it was all over, but then Cuauhtemoc pulled the reins to the side, making the horse turn in a sharp circle before setting off at a slow amble. She clamped her legs against the horse's midsection and grabbed onto his mane with both hands. She let go though when Tlazocozcatl tossed his head. Instead she grabbed onto the only other thing within reach—Cuauhtemoc's legs, on either side of her. He said nothing so she kept hold, being careful to only curl the buckskin in her fists. "I want to go back to the palace," she choked, clamping her eyes shut.
Cuauhtemoc laughed. "Back to grinding maize and washing floors?" His warm breath behind her ear sent pleasant chills up her spine. "You might actually enjoy horseback riding."
When she opened her eyes again, they passed under a gate, but not the one she'd come in through. Open land lay before them; no buildings, just trees and fields, and a small, serpentine dirt path that wound across the countryside. Numerous horses roamed free, and they raised their heads and called to Tlazocozcatl in their strange horse-speak, which he answered loudly. Tall stone walls in the distance fenced everything in. Hearing more hoof beats behind them, Malinali looked back to see Cuauhtemoc's bodyguards trailing behind them on horseback too.
Once they settled into a comfortable pace, Malinali finally let go of Cuauhtemoc's legs and rested her hands on the horse's shoulders, marveling at the power in the animal's sleek muscles.
"Why don't you give it a try?" Cuauhtemoc handed her the reins.
She started to protest, but his hands on hers turned her tongue sluggish. She gripped the reins tightly, acutely aware of the strength of his chest and arms cradling her gently, and he didn't take his hands away from hers. Gods, I hope mine aren't as sweaty as they feel!
"Don't pull or he'll think you want him to stop," Cuauhtemoc murmured in her ear. "Give him slack and let him go where he wants until he starts straying, then give the reins a gentle pull, to show him where to go."
She focused on controlling her breath and slowing the quick thud of her heart, fearing none of it had anything to do with being scared of riding.
With the stable far in the distance, they approached a clump of trees and Cuauhtemoc suggested they stop. He dismounted then lifted Malinali down. She felt lightheaded and stiff-legged. He handed the reins off to one of his guards then headed to an outcrop of rocks to the east of the trees, the sack still slung across his back. He climbed up then beckoned her to follow. Grumbling under her breath, she obeyed.
Once she reached the top, she understood what Cuauhtemoc wanted her to see. From here, she could see all the way across the valley, over Tenochtitlan and the cities sprawling along the lake's edge. Sunlight speckled the ripples on the sky-blue water, and the black slope of Mount Tlaloc towered in the distance, presiding over everything.
A proud smile tugged at Cuauhtemoc's mouth. "Beautiful, isn't it?"
"Very." But when she looked into the mountains to the northeast, across the lake, a spike of melancholy grabbed her. She'd lost her son out there, and he could be dead for all she knew. She turned away, unable to look anymore. Someday, I'll win my freedom and I will go find the truth, my little Ollin. I promise.
She expected Cuauhtemoc to hand her the bag, so she could set out the dishes for him, but instead he sat on the edge of the rock and unloaded it himself. "You've probably seen far more beautiful sights than that though. I bet you've seen more of my empire than I have."
"There's much beauty out there," she agreed. "But much ugliness too."
He looked about to comment but instead he nodded. "Did you know there are lands to the east, across the sea?"
"So I've heard."
"There are ones to the west as well, though eventually they become the lands of the east." He shook his head. "Hard times lie ahead, for the Spanish were merely the beginning."
If life had taught Malinali anything, it was that men were men, regardless of where they came from—all willing to destroy anything innocent and beautiful to get their way—so what did it matter if more of the pale men came? Life couldn't possibly be any worse for them conquering the Mexica.
"It's vitally important to the future that we all come together and learn to trust each other," Cuauhtemoc said.
Before she could stop herself, she burst out laughing.
He gave her a subtle smile. "What's so amusing?"
"Sometimes the past is too much to overcome. Especially where history leaves a bitter taste."
"For example?"
With her own subtle smile, she sat opposite him. "Rumor has it that you want to make peace with the Tlaxcalans."
Cuauhtemoc watched her, a calculating look in his eyes. "Yes, but they're unwilling to answer my envoys."
"If they were the ones with the horses and steel swords, wouldn't you be paranoid? For two hundred years, the Mexica have tried conquering Tlaxcala, tried to pound them into submission, but every huey tlatoani has failed. That's a point of pride for the Tlaxcalans; now imagine that pride armed with your new weapons."
"Guns and armor didn't help the Spanish when I marched thirty thousand men against them and told every warrior he was a priest, ordered to sacrifice every Spaniard on the battlefield. We've changed how we fight, but the Tlaxcalans haven't, and in the end, that will destroy them." He took a swig from his water skin. "Some would say let them destroy themselves, but they're too important. If we're to continue standing against the nations across the sea, we must make peace and be a united front. It's the only way." He tied the water skin closed again. "How do you know so much about Tlaxcala?"
Malinali cursed herself, but it was too late. If she answered, it would lead to more questions, but if she didn't, he might start prying again, and she liked that he wasn't trying to decode her as if she were some obscure sacred text promising him the secrets to power and pleasure.
Stay close to the truth, so he can't catch you in a lie later on, she decided. "Yours isn't the first palace I've served in." She kept her eyes downcast this time.
"You were a slave in Tlaxcala's royal court?" When she nodded, he asked, "For which lord?"
After another hesitation, she answered, "Acxotecatl, their military general." She met his gaze again, her heart thudding. Please don't ask any more. Please don't ruin what little trust I have that you're a decent human being.
He watched her a moment but then said no more about Tlaxcala or Acxotecatl.
Chapter Four
My guards surely think me insane, Cuauhtemoc thought with a grin, but he didn't care. He'd finally earned a little of Malinali's trust, so he needed to show her that he trusted her too. "Pull it all the way to your cheek, and keep your arm straight; don't bend it, or the bowstring will sting you," he said at her shoulder. "See the target down the shaft, and keep still."
Malinali squinted down the arrow at the tree trunk, her right hand holding the string taut. When a tremor started in her left arm, he motioned to the guards to stand further clear. He checked her aim. "Breathe slowly, then release."
She let out a slow breath, her arm falling still again, but when she finally released, the arrow skimmed the target and ricocheted off to the left. She frowned. "I'm not strong enough to do this," she grumbled as she fetched the arrow.
"Perhaps you enjoy my interrogations more." When she scowled at him over her shoulder, he laughed, his heart dancing. It warmed him that she felt comfortable enough to sometimes forget protocol and show him the real her.
When she returned to his side, she set herself up for the shot again and drew the arrow back with a fluid motion that spoke of experience.
"And you say you're not strong enough."
Finally cracking a smile, Malinali focused on the tree again, steadier this time, and when she released, the arrow sunk into the target; not in the center, but close.
He raised an eyebrow
. Maybe she was picturing my face on that tree. He tried to laugh away the thought but it niggled at him as he went to wrest the arrow free of the tree, his back to her. He trusted his guards to disarm her quickly, yet he still worried he'd turn around to find her pointing an arrow right at him, her intense dark eyes locked on him.
She was looking at him, but with a distance reserved for daydreaming. He waved the arrow at her, a grin tugging the corner of his mouth, and she blinked, her cheeks flushed. "That was a good shot." He handed back the arrow then moved behind her again, close enough to fill his nose with the intoxicating smell of her hair. "Let's see it dead center this time." He then stepped away, giving her room to shoot—and to calm the blood pulsing in his ears.
She nocked the arrow again and pulled the string tight. She took her deep breath, but the focus wasn't there this time; he saw it in the shaking of her arms, and the hesitation to release the string. She even closed her eyes before letting go, and the arrow hissed off to the left again, this time striking the stone wall with such force it shattered the obsidian point. She cringed.
"What happened?" Cuauhtemoc asked.
Malinali avoided his gaze. "I don't know. I'm...I'm tired. I didn't sleep well last night, and it's been a long day...." She glared at the tree.
It was still quite hot but nightfall wasn't far off now. He hadn't intended to stay out here so long, but Lord Sun traveled the sky faster when he was with Malinali. He motioned to the guards and they brought over Tlazocozcatl. "We should head back; everyone is no doubt wondering where you are." At the sudden panic on her face, he added, "Don't worry, I'll speak to the head steward. I promise you won't be in any trouble." He mounted up; one of the guards helped Malinali up into the saddle in front of him, and they headed back towards the stables, Cuauhtemoc taking the reins. He held Malinali tightly, to make better time back.
Not long after they set off, she grew heavy against his chest, eventually slumping against him, resting her head against his right shoulder. He moved his left arm across her, to hold her limp body as her weight shifted to one side, and silently cursed the treacherous stiffness growing below. The tantalizing scent of her skin, and the warmth of her soft body brought desire chewing at his attention, but he prided himself on his self-control, whether it was resisting the pain of torture or the torture of promised pleasure. He focused on the road ahead and the information Malinali had shared about Tlaxcala. Yet even then, her beguiling scent made his reaction slow to retreat.
She slept not only the whole way back to the stables, but also to the docks where the royal barge awaited them. When Cuauhtemoc whispered for her to wake, she finally did so. "How did it get so late?" she mumbled groggily as the guards helped her down from the saddle and onto the boat. Lord Sun had sunk behind the mountains—beginning his quest into the underworld—so the two polers held torches on the bow and stern of the boat to light the way. Cuauhtemoc climbed aboard, taking refuge inside the three-sided hut with walls made of leather hides bound over reed mats—to protect him from arrow attacks.
Malinali glanced warily over the boat's bow before sitting behind the lead poler as he pushed away from the docks, starting the journey back to Tenochtitlan. She held her knees to her chest with both arms, and whenever a bird or animal called out in the night, she looked about with sharp panic. Most people avoided the lake after nightfall, fearing for ahuitzotls—the mythical lake monsters who dragged people under to their deaths. Cuauhtemoc didn't believe in such things—he believed in the gods, but not mythical lake monsters or the blood-sucking civatateos said to prowl the night. There were far more frightening monsters to be found among humankind itself. Still, he hated to see her so anxious and vulnerable. "You can sit in here with me, if you'd feel safer," he called.
She snapped an irritated glare back at him, but then slipped on a sardonic smile before looking away again.
His ears burned. He struggled for something to say to break the silence, but after such an amused dismissal, the prospect of talking to her made him sweat. How was it that he could move soldiers to great acts of heroism and sacrifice with impassioned speeches, yet his mouth went as dry as the northern desert when he thought to tell Malinali that he'd enjoyed their afternoon together? He cursed himself and stared at the bottom of the boat, flustered in a way he hadn't been since he was a boy.
The boat slid soundlessly up the canal behind the palace then under the eaves, where more guards awaited them, before conking against the dock. Malinali hurried ashore, almost tripping as she exited before one of the guards caught and steadied her. As Cuauhtemoc exited too, she said, "If you require nothing further of me, My Lord, I should go report to the head steward."
"No, go get some sleep. It's been a long day, so I will speak with the head steward myself."
"Thank you, My Lord." She bowed, then started backing away to the hallway.
"Malinali," he finally managed, his heart thudding painfully. I had a wonderful time with you this afternoon, the best I've had in a long time, and I can't wait to see you again tomorrow. But when she didn't meet his gaze, his courage failed him. "Don't forget about lunch tomorrow."
She bowed again then disappeared into the shadows beyond the doorway.
¤
Disturbingly pleasant lightheadedness followed Malinali as she wandered down the corridor back to the slave quarters. Why had Cuauhtemoc called out to her? Certainly not to remind her of their daily routine? She'd thought he would say something else—something to make her heart pound in her ears—but she received only a pointless reminder. And you thought you had him all figured out, she mused as she walked into the slave quarters.
The sounds of desperate chatter greeted her. "Dear gods, where have you been?" Xochitli jumped up from the group of women gathered in front of the hearth. "Everyone said you ran away!"
Malinali blinked, taken aback. "I was with the huey tlatoani, in Chapultepec." Noticing Tayanna watching from the corner, Malinali beckoned to Xochitli and they retreated into the sleeping quarters.
Once alone, Xochitli whispered, "What were you doing in Chapultepec?"
With a faint smile, Malinali said, "He took me riding...on those things, I think they're called horses. And he let me shoot with his bow and arrows."
Xochitli arched an eyebrow. "He did?"
Malinali had been equally surprised when Cuauhtemoc suggested the activity, and now she chuckled, remembering the incredulous looks the guards cast at him when he'd handed her the bow and quiver. She had some experience with shooting bows and arrows; unlike the Mexica who locked up their noblewomen and condemned them to a life of weaving and childbearing, her own people expected their queens and ranking noblewomen to know how to handle weapons as well as any man. Since she had stood to inherit her family's throne, her father had started training her before he died, and the bits and pieces of his lessons had slowly come back to her. It thrilled her to know she hadn't lost the skill, especially when she sank the arrow deep into the tree when she imagined Acxotecatl's face as the target. She'd tried imagining Cuauhtemoc's face too, to see what would happen, but the loathing wasn't there as normal. It had been a very long time since anyone had treated her as anything but a slave, and she couldn't help but like him a little more for that.
When Xochitli waved a hand in front of her, Malinali flushed and struggled to remember the question. "Oh, yes, he did, and it was...nice. Usually he eats and asks me questions."
Xochitli furrowed her brow. "What kinds of questions?"
"About my life, where I've lived, where I've traveled. He's particularly interested in how I became a slave and where I was after Potonchan."
"Strange."
"Please don't tell anyone. If Tayanna finds out...it will only make her gossip more."
"She won't hear anything from me," Xochitli promised. "Are you hungry? There are beans and tortillas left over."
"I'm starving."
Once Xochitli left, Malinali stretched out on her bed mat and stared up at the whitewashed ceiling, thinking back
over this strange yet wonderful day, of sitting on Tlazocozcatl's back in Cuauhtemoc's arms, his warm, firm body pressed against hers, his strong hands holding hers as she gripped the reins. She imagined those arms wrapping tighter around her, pulling her into an embrace that left her breathless and tingling as he brushed his lips against her ear.
Oh, how soon you forget poor Tecuichpo and what he did to her. What would she think to see your lustful thoughts for the man she loved, the man who killed her? You would betray her friendship and trust for a moment of meaningless pleasure?
The moment soured with shame, Malinali covered her eyes with her arm, to hide her tears should Xochitli return. "Forgive me, Tecuichpo. It won't happen again."
¤
That night, Malinali dreamt that Tecuichpo rose from the grave to berate her for her disloyalty. "You know I loved him," she moaned, beetles and centipedes scurrying in and out of her empty eye sockets, and her skin hanging from her bony frame like shredded curtains. "I loved him and look what he did to me!" Malinali woke shivering and despising herself.
All morning, her stomach roiled with fear and guilt as the noon hour pressed closer. When she collected the lunch tray, she felt nauseated.
Cuauhtemoc's guards opened the door curtain for her when she arrived. Inside, Cuauhtemoc paced his anteroom, muttering to himself, but his face lit up when he saw her, making the shame and fear churn in her stomach. "I thought it would be nice to take the meal out in the garden today," he suggested. He then motioned to the food taster, who stepped up. Malinali stared at the floor as the taster did his job, but she flinched when he finished and Cuauhtemoc took the tray from her. "Let me carry that for you." He was so warm and unassuming.
Yesterday his smile made her heart flutter, but now it set her chest throbbing painfully. She followed him down the stairs and through the halls, out into the main garden. His guards flanked them closely the whole way, to a hunched willow tree overlooking a small pond. There he set the tray down in the sun, his shadow sending tiny fish darting into the safety of the reeds. He motioned Malinali to sit down.
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