by Lisa Daniels
“My life is worth less than that,” the young woman muttered as she walked toward home, “but it doesn’t mean I don’t hope for better.”
Chapter 2
An Errand and a Price
Taja felt a little uneasy as she went home. She was certainly happy that she would get away from work for a bit, but her home life wasn’t exactly something that was enviable. The temptation to just run away and figure things out on her own, if only for a few hours, slowed her steps. Still, there was no way she could go through with it. Her mother needed her. The only person Taja had in the world right now was her mother, and despite everything, she wanted to take care of the woman who had given her life. It was why Taja worked so hard at the stables, and why Taja endured so much even now with Damaris in charge.
Braylon will be back soon. I just need to wait a little longer. Besides, it’s not like this is the worst I’ve ever had to deal with, so it’ll be fine. Everything is going to be fine. It had become her mantra over the last few months as she tried to give herself the courage to get through everything.
While she didn’t feel energized enough to speed up, Taja was able to smile as she headed home. After all, dealing with her mom was something the young woman had been doing forever. It was far easier than dealing with a guy like Semaj, and she knew exactly what her mother was thinking.
Taja was still smiling as she opened the door. The smile vanished as something smashed close to her head. Reflexively Taja ducked, but the shards had already struck her neck and ear. Most of the bottle fell to the floor, and she immediately began to pick them up, ignoring the blood trickling out of the cuts from the rest of the bottle.
“You are home early.” Her mother’s voice was slurred and threatening. “Don’t tell me you have been fired already.”
Taja looked up and forced a smile. “No, mother. I was paid this morning, and I finished all of my work early, so Damaris let me come home early.”
Her mother huffed, “Then the man is a fool. And you are an idiot. You could have stayed and worked more. Gotten more money. How am I supposed to pay for both of us? Do you think that money just comes out of the ground?” Her face was turning redder as she watched her daughter clean up the broken bottle. “What are you smiling about?”
Taja pressed her lips together. “Because I have a surprise for you, mother.” The young woman threw the glass into the trash, then walked over to her mother. Pulling the money out of her pocket, she held it up. “I was paid extra. See?”
At first her mother’s eyes went wide. Her hands were much faster than anyone would have believed was possible considering the woman’s state, but Taja knew exactly how quick her mother was when it came to money. “Good, you can buy my alcohol too, then.” The woman pushed the money back at Taja. “Get going. I made a list over on the table of everything we need. Make sure you pick up more of my Montelia while you are out. And don’t try to get any of that cheap, watered-down stuff. Stanglen will know what I want.”
“But, mother, I thought that-”
Before she finished talking, her mother’s hand had struck Taja across the face. The blood from the cuts smeared across the young woman’s face all the way to her mouth.
Her mother snarled at her, “Don’t think that I’m giving you a dime. We are in this situation because you gave up the life that made us rich. If not for your stupidity, I would be living up in one of the manors. Since you like living in filth, you can pay for everything.” Her mother tried to get up to intimidate her daughter, but she only managed to fall off of the couch. By the time the woman hit the floor, she was already asleep.
Taja looked down at her mother, her heart full of shame. It was her fault they lived like this because she hadn’t wanted to continue to be a toy. Because of that, they had been forced out of a chateau and into this hovel. Taja picked her mother up as gently as possible and set her on the couch. Her mother’s stringy grey hair fell over a face that was too skinny. Once the woman had been beautiful, but alcohol and life had taken that away from her. It was the reason Taja had gotten out when Braylon had offered her a position in the stables. But that selfish decision for something better had forced her mother into poverty during the last years of her life.
Knowing that she was a terrible daughter, Taja went and cleaned up the blood and cuts. Strategically fixing her hair to hide the worst of it, Taja turned to leave the home.
“Goodbye, mother. I will be home soon,” she murmured from the door.
The majority of her errands consisted of paying bills and debt, but a few of the errands were actually pleasant. Taja smiled sweetly as she and the sales girl at the candle and soap shop talked. Taja had known Ione for a couple of years, ever since Braylon had brought her in to have the young woman learn how to live independently from the men who used her. Ione had never judged her. While they weren’t exactly friends, they did chat and giggle whenever Taja stopped by to shop. Too afraid of making friends, Taja had turned Ione down several times to go out together. Ione had taken the hint and stopped asking after the third try. Several years older than Taja, Ione had felt a bit like an older sister, but with no real connection, she thought it best to help whenever Taja allowed it. They rarely talked seriously, but the young woman always left with a sincere smile, and that was enough.
The two were talking, when a handsome man passed by the window. Ione giggled and tapped Taja’s shoulder. “I know you should never judge them by the way they look, but that is one beautiful specimen right there.” Her long fingers covered her cherry red lips as she giggled. Taja smiled at the way her friend giggled, her brown curls bouncing beside her face. Ione was beautiful, just not in the classic sense. Her hair was very thick, which was why the woman kept it short. She had been able to teach Taja all kinds of tricks for making soap without all of the fancy ingredients, as well as things that could be used as makeup without harming her skin. When she giggled, there was definitely a schoolgirlish quality to her, but it rarely happened over men – it was almost always because of the wild stories Taja told. Excited to see a man who could get Ione’s attention, Taja turned. She didn’t get a good look at the man’s face, but she certainly recognized the clothes. He was looking around the street, clearly searching for something.
Or someone. Taja immediately hid her face, her eyes wide as she prayed he didn’t look in the shop.
Ione was tapping her shoulder repeatedly. “Oh, he’s looking this way! He’s definitely looking for something. Let’s go see if we can help him!” She was moving toward the door when Taja’s hand shot out and grabbed Ione’s wrist.
“No. I-I need to hurry. My mother will be waiting for me, and I didn’t realize the time. I’m sorry, Ione, but could you help me finish up so I can get through with my list of chores?” Taja held up the list her mother had pointed out, one that Taja herself had written just the night before.
“Of course,” Ione’s head turned back to look at the young man. “Too bad. I don’t usually feel so...” With a shake of her head, her gaze returned to Taja. “Let’s get you back on the road.”
Taja gave a sigh of relief as she left the shop. The young man had stood there looking around for a while, but by the time she had everything, he was gone. There were only a few things left on the list. Thinking that the rest of her day would be quite easy, Taja headed to the last couple of shops.
Taja took a deep breath as she looked at the sign over the tavern door – The King’s Bloody Jester. She hadn’t been here in a while because her mother usually insisted on buying her own alcohol after Taja had failed to bring the right brand a couple of times. It made her uncomfortable going into the tavern because Stanglen had been trying to persuade her to sleep with him ever since she was 15 years old. It was why she had chosen to go to other establishments and angered her mother. There was no way around it this time, though.
Stepping into the building with a friendly grin on her face, Taja nodded toward a couple of men that she recognized from work. They raised their glasses toward her, the
n returned their attention to whatever it was they were doing.
The young woman tried to keep from looking at the barman until she had no other option. She could feel when he had noticed her because the bar area quieted down considerably.
“Well, it has certainly been a while, my darling Taja.” Stanglen’s voice grated on her nerves like a person kicking the back of her chair at the theater.
The smile firmly fixed in place, she turned her eyes toward the man. He was bald and had clearly been in a lot of fights. His nose had been broken so many times it looked like someone had dropped a glob of clay on his pudgy face. He was about as round as he was tall, but there was plenty of muscle under the fat. The man’s eyes were always watery, and it was clear he was in the later stages of some type of liver disease. “Stanglen, it has been a while. You know mother, though. I just don’t have the understanding of alcohol the way she does, so it is difficult to entrust these sorts of tasks to me. I know you wouldn’t want her to drink anything but your best.” The words were like lemons as she forced them out. Hoping that her obvious disinterest in seeing him would keep his advances in check, she held up the list.
He pushed it away, “Ah, I think we need to spend some time getting reacquainted. There’s no need to rush this.”
She shrugged, working to keep the smile in place. “I wish that were true, but she was just finishing up the last bit when I headed out. I want to make sure she gets to drink before she goes to bed. It does help her sleep.” The young woman moved the list back in front of her, her large brown eyes boring into him. Silently she prayed he would accept.
“I’ll tell you what,” the man leaned forward and she could smell his foul breath, “I can cut you a good deal. I know that the money isn’t rolling in like it used to. You are aging.” His eyes looked her up and down, causing the young woman to close her other hand into a fist. “Why don’t you give me time to get better acquainted with you,” his hand moved against hers and a finger ran along the back of her hand, “and I’ll let you have all of this for free.” His hand pointed to the items on the list.
His eyes looked at her expectantly. Taja could not keep the smile on her face as she shook her head, “I’m so sorry, Stanglen, but I really don’t wish to leave my mother alone much longer. She was not well when I left and I had so many errands to run.”
The man leaned back away from her. “Well, I tried to help. If you want all of that, it’ll cost you 200 gold.”
Taja’s mouth open and closed, “But, but that’s more than twice what-”
“Oh no, darling, it isn’t.” There were chuckles from some of the men at the bar. “It has been too long since you have been here. I am still willing to give you my special deal.” His thin lips were in a nasty grin.
Before she could answer, a gentle voice spoke from behind her, “Here you go.” Money was tossed on the counter in a little bag. “That should cover this round, the next one, the next one, well, you get the idea.”
Taja’s eyes watched as Stanglen’s gaze moved between the bag and the man standing behind her. He was clearly torn, but not for long. His hands whipped the bag off the counter and tipped the contents into his hand. As the gold covered his hand and poured onto the counter, all the barman could manage was to nod at the stranger. “I understand. Yes. That is plenty.”
“A promissory note.”
Stanglen shook his head, clearly missing the man’s meaning.
The stranger stepped up beside Taja, who was too afraid to see who the stranger was. “You are to give a note to this lady saying that she is free to come in and pick up the purchase without having to listen to your solicitations or harassment.”
The fact that Stanglen didn’t have anything to say to the last part of the man’s statement told her that she already knew who he was. She had seen a similar look earlier that day.
“But, sir, I do not know how to write,” the barkeep stammered.
“Ah, I should have realized. Here.” The man had a piece of paper and tool in his hand before anyone could offer. He quickly scrawled on the paper and held it for Stanglen to sign. “Just an X is fine. And just in case,” the man pulled himself up on the bar, “may I have your attention, please. Yes, that’s right, this way. I want to make sure you are all aware of this deal. This lady,” he gestured toward Taja who was frozen in terror, “has … ah, for lack of an easier term for your small minds, a reverse tab. Our dear barkeep is now indebted to her, and she shall be able to come and go with as much booze as she sees fit. Nod if you understand.”
As if hypnotized, the patrons nodded. Taja couldn’t look.
“Very good. I bid you all happy drinking in this fine establishment.” With that, he stepped down.
Taja’s tiny hand grabbed his sleeve. “I can’t let you do this.”
Stanglen’s hands were running through the money under the counter. “I’m not giving this back.” He shoved several bottles at her. “Take this and go before he changes his mind.” His eyes never left the gold.
Her heart pounding, Taja collected the bottles and placed them in the basket with the other items she had picked up. Her body was shaking as she turned to leave. Tears were forming in her eyes as she stepped out of the tavern. She took a few steps from the door, and she was not surprised to hear steps following her out of the establishment.
Spinning around, she couldn’t keep the tears from falling as she turned to face the stranger. Her hand automatically went to his collar. “Let me guess how you want me to pay you back.” Despite her best effort, she couldn’t stop her hand from shaking.
She felt a warm hand take hers. Instead of a kiss or other romantic gesture, the man removed her hand from his clothing and released it gently. Taja’s eyes went up to his face. The man was exquisite. His face was like the pictures of angels with the gentle angles that formed his features. His jaw was firm, but a smile made it look friendly. The man’s eyes were large and green. Except for her own, she had never seen anyone with eyes so large. The way his hair swayed in the evening breeze reminded her of the gentle way the ocean moved on a sunny day.
“Are you alright?” His question took her by surprise.
“What?”
He smiled, and she couldn’t help but smile in response. “Are you alright?”
The man’s voice was soft, nothing like the sarcastic or firm voice she had heard with the noble or the barman.
She smiled again and gave a little nod. “I think I am fine now.” The young woman noticed the man’s hand move, but only slightly.
Suddenly, he bowed. “Knowing that and seeing your sincere smile is enough.” He turned to leave, then stopped. His face turned just a little so she could see his profile. “Please be a little more careful. I’m afraid my time here is fairly limited, and I would hate to leave knowing that you may need a savior.” With that he started walking away from her.
Taja stood there watching the man leave, her mind completely at a loss. Except for Braylon, men always wanted something more. Braylon had already confessed that she reminded him of his daughter, a young woman whom he had lost in the war a few years ago. She had fallen in love with a soldier and had insisted on going with him when he went to war. Neither returned. There was no doubt about Braylon’s intentions, and so she felt comforted when he was near. But this man confused her. Twice he had been there for her. She had run the first time not wanting to hear what his request was. Now she felt shame. Even if she wanted to pay him back, there was nothing she could do that would be worth what he had given her.
For the first time in years, her heart beat faster as she thought about a man. Taja had promised herself that she would never fall prey to such easy tricks, but now that someone actually showed compassion for no reason at all, the young woman found that she was just as weak as the women she had loathed.
Her hand went to her mouth as she turned to head home, her mind full of an insane hope.
Chapter 3
In Hope, Despair
Taja reached home to find
things exactly as she had left them. Pulling a blanket over her mother, the woman began to straighten up the mess made since she had left for work that morning. She took care of the dishes, cleaned up the remains of the breakfast she had made, and sat down to a small meal. The basket of things she had brought home sat on the counter beside her. Taja realized that she was smiling at the bottles as she finished a small sandwich. Shaking her head, the young woman frowned. Hope was a very dangerous thing. It had gotten the better of her enough times to know that it had no place in her life.
So one man was kind without apparently wanting anything in return. If what he said was true and he was leaving the town soon, there must have been some reason for what he did. Perhaps he was marking her for future use. It was not unheard of that wizards and witches could stake out a person and demand a favor later.
If that is all he wants, I won’t want to deny him. Almost as soon as she thought it, Taja was embarrassed. If that was his intention, what he may want could be far worse than what Stanglen wanted or what would have happened if she had been run over. Taja looked at the bottles and knew that it really wouldn’t matter. Her life had never been her own, and if there was someone willing to look after her for his own ends, that would be no different than what she had been through so many times before today. Her heart sank a little as she began to assign other designs on the man who had saved her twice that day. As much as she wanted to believe his words and the sincerity on his face, experience had taught her everything she needed to know about where that would get her. Best to forget it until the man decided to call in the favors.
She set about putting things away and got ready for bed. As Taja finished putting on her nightgown, she looked out of the window and her mind immediately wondered where the young man was staying and what his story was. His large eyes were beautiful, but as she remembered them, there was definitely something she recognized in them – pain. His smile was beautiful, but it did not reflect in his eyes. Perhaps that was why he had not stayed to talk to her. Perhaps he felt sorry about what he was going to have to do to her later.