by A. E. Murphy
Nathan stands his ground, I wish they’d move away from the stairs, it’s making me nervous. All I can picture is one of them falling. “Nathan,” I say quietly, his eyes don’t come to me.
“You’re drunk,” he states, referring to his father.
“The Petersons have been a part of my company for years… so imagine my shock when they told me they were terminating our contract.”
Nathan shrugs, “They came to me after I spoke to Harrison.” I have no idea who any of these people are. “He’s selling me one of his smaller stores.”
Well that’s good.
“It won’t work,” his father sways slightly as his arm lifts to point a finger at Nathan. “Your jewellery is amateur.”
“Better than old fashioned,” I mutter and the angry drunk sneers at me.
“Nobody respects the opinion of a whore,” Mr Weston growls at me, his tone full of malice and hate. Totally undeserved.
Nathan’s body tightens, I feel the space around us fill with his anger, his fury. It’s so potent I can almost see it. I really wouldn’t like to be his father right now; who is oblivious and staring at me.
“She’s still here,” his eyes are on me but his words are aimed at Nathan. “We had a deal.”
“And when you received the papers from my solicitor; that should have told you I had no interest in making a deal with you. I have no interest in you at all actually.”
Go Nathan!
His father begins to descend the stairs, Nathan cuts ahead of him and puts himself between us. “You always were a failure, Nathan. Failed as a son, failed college, failed university, you’ll fail this too.” What?
“I don’t care. I’m bored of hearing you say it.” Nathan sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. “You need to leave before you make a bigger fool of yourself.”
Mr Weston leans around his son, “He’ll fail you too.” His cold eyes go to his son, his body still swaying from the effects of whatever alcohol it is he’s consumed. “Like he failed me and his brother.”
Gasp.
Nathan takes a step towards him but my hand shoots out and grabs his arm, “Nathan.”
He looks back at me, his eyes sad and showing his wavering control. His father doesn’t stop, “This business will fail. You don’t have what it takes. You’re lazy, incompetent and stupid.”
“I wonder who he gets that from,” I remark dryly.
“Stay out of this Gwen,” Nathan warns and runs a hand through his hair. “Leave us.”
He’s asking me to leave? No, not asking, telling. “What?”
“Take the car keys and go out for an hour. There are things I need to speak to my father about.”
“I’m not leaving you. Not with him,” my face contorts in disgust.
Nathan flies around and tilts his head to catch my eyes, “I said leave. You’re my guest, you’ll do as you’re told. My father and I have things we need to talk about, without you present. Contact Jeanine, tell her not to come.”
I want to be angry but the pain in his eyes wipes that away in an instant, I speak in a hushed tone, “Are you going to be okay?”
His eyes soften and his body drops an inch, “Yes. Please. I don’t want you to be here while he is. Let me speak with him and then he’ll never have a reason to return.”
“I don’t like it,” I admit but feel my previous decision begin to waver. “Call me if you need me.”
Nathan reaches into his pocket and pulls out a bunch of notes, I go to back away but he shoves them into my back pocket and nudges my forehead with his nose. I find the strange display of affection comforting, even though I shouldn’t.
“Paying for her services already?” His father bates but I ignore him. Nathan doesn’t though, he twists and grabs his father by the throat. I squeal and press my back against the wall as Nathan whispers into his father’s ear. I can’t hear what he’s saying, I’m not sure Mr Weston can either. His face is almost purple.
“Go, I’m not giving him the ability to speak until you’re gone,” meaning if I don’t leave right now, his father will suffocate in about twenty seconds. I duck my head and flee the house, grabbing the car keys on the way.
Jeanine is pulling into the drive as I exit the house, I immediately rush to her and lie my arse off. “Nathan wants to be alone right now, he’s just had some… umm… bad family news that he needs to deal with.”
She doesn’t believe me, not in the slightest. She does promise to follow me back into the village though for a drink. I need a coffee, decaf or not, I still need it.
Mr Weston is vile. VILE! Grr, I just want to poke him in the eye.
Who would say that to their son? It’s disgusting. Nathan isn’t a failure. He’s talented and smart and he can actually be quite funny at times.
******
“Whatever it is, it’s none of your business,” Jeanine says softly, her hand cups mine over the table. My free hand nurses my coffee close to my chest. “You’ve been mulling over whatever is on your mind for far too long. It isn’t your business and it isn’t mine.”
“I know.”
“Do you? Nathan is a complex man, there are secrets that the Weston house keeps that I even dread to think about. If you want to help him, just be there for him.”
I nod quickly and chew on my lip. “I don’t think I like it here anymore.”
“Did you ever?” She seems to be joking but I can tell it’s to soften the tone of her sincerity.
I nod again, “Yes. Nathan is actually a joy to be around sometimes.”
“He’s no Caleb,” she comments, causing me to wince. “He’ll never be Caleb.”
“I know,” why do people assume I don’t know this? “I don’t want him to be Caleb, Caleb doesn’t even enter my mind when I’m with Nathan.” Oh shit. Wrong choice of words. “I mean… he does but not in a comparison type of way… you know what I mean Jeanine.”
She smiles, showing sparkly white dentures, “Yes. I do.” Her body tilts closer as her eyes scan the people around us. “Don’t try and figure it out.”
“Figure what out?”
“Why Caleb was loved and Nathan wasn’t. It…” She sighs heavily and leans back. “Forget I said anything.”
Oh no, she can’t leave it like that. “What do you mean Caleb was loved?”
“I’ve said too much.”
“Then say something more, what’s the difference?”
Jeanine frowns, her eyes shadow over with past memories I’m eager to know. “I signed something, if I say anything to anyone, Nathan will take pleasure in destroying me.”
“Can’t you give me even the slightest hint?”
She looks out of the window and shifts in her seat. I want to shake her, scream at her, make her tell me what I want to know. “My daughter is only a year older than Nathan as you know. She was playing out by the old barn,” the barn that is no more than charred wood I’m assuming. “When she saw some things that… well let’s just say it took quite a bit of therapy to help her get past it.”
“What things?”
“I’m not telling you to fuel your curiosity, I’m telling you because whatever secrets Nathan has, he likes to keep them that way. The entire family is one huge riddle and trust me when I say, they’re a riddle you don’t want to solve. Nathan and Caleb are and were good men, he’ll look after you. That’s all you need to know. Other than that… don’t get involved.” Her stern tone is quiet, only loud enough for me to hear. What is she talking about? I need to know. “Don’t try to dig anything up, and keep out of Nathan’s way.”
“I don’t understand.”
She rubs her tired eyes and shifts again, her discomfort obvious, “You don’t need to. Just don’t get attached.”
“Why?” Not that I’m planning on it, for obvious reasons. “He won’t hurt me.” Why am I arguing this point? I don’t want to get attached in the way she’s assuming anyway.
She chuckles sadly, her eyes still gazing out of the window. “That’s not what I
’m worried about sweetie. I’m worried you’ll hurt him.”
My breath leaves me. Jeanine stands, thanks me for the coffee and exits the café with her head bowed. I mull over her words again and again until I no longer remember the exact conversation. Only her parting words stick in my mind.
How could I hurt him? Nathan is… he seems impenetrable. He’s his own fortress, nothing seems to affect him. I’d never hurt him intentionally, I’ve been clear about my feelings from the start. I think.
Although he is insistent that we’ll be more than friends.
Maybe he’s just toying with me, testing my loyalty to his brother. Do I even have any loyalty to Caleb anymore? It sure doesn’t feel like it. I’ve betrayed him numerous times since he died.
Chapter Twenty
It’s been three hours and I’ve heard nothing from Nathan. I decided twenty minutes ago that I wasn’t staying away any longer. Now I’m sat in the car outside of Nathan’s house, twisting my hands on the steering wheel whilst staring at the front door through the windshield.
The front door opens and Nathan stands there, he motions for me to come in. I climb out of the car and walk towards him, noticing two bags on the floor behind him.
“What’s this?” I enquire, my brows furrowed and my worries heightened. Is he kicking me out?
“We’re going to the city,” he responds. “Check your bag, make sure I’ve packed everything.”
I do as I’m told, hiding my annoyance that yet again he went through my things. “Everything is here. Why are we going to the city?”
“You’ll see,” gah, a surprise. I hate surprises.
Well, actually I love them, I’m just impatient for them. “No clues?”
“I need…” He makes a squelching noise with his mouth. “I need your help with something.”
“As long as it doesn’t involve belly dancing or sky diving I guess I can do my best,” he helps me into the car, his eyes distant. His mind clearly troubled with things unknown. Not even a smirk? “Tough crowd.”
“Sorry,” he mumbles and closes the passenger side door.
“Let’s play a game,” I suggest after he’s seated.
He looks at me with a quirked brow, I slap his arm. “Fine, fine. What game?”
“Well, it’s not really a game,” I twist my fingers on my lap and look out of the window to the passing countryside.
“Then what is it?”
“I ask a question, you ask a question.”
I don’t need to look at him to know he’s frowning, “That doesn’t sound like fun.”
“What’s your favourite colour?”
He chuckles, “Fair enough. It’s dark blue. Yours?”
“That counts as your question. Mine’s dark pink.” I sort through my compiled questions. “What’s the happiest memory you have?”
He blanches, his eyes widen before the shutters come down. “Pass.”
“You can’t pass.”
“I can.”
Oh… the reason dawns on me. OH. It’s a sexual one then. Okay. Moving on. “What’s the saddest memory you have?”
“Pass.”
“You suck,” I grunt and move onto another question. “You have to answer this one.”
He smirks, his eyes lit with humour, “I do, do I?”
“Yes,” nod. “Have you ever been in love?”
His smile fades in an instant, “You’re terrible. You know that right?”
“Yep.”
“Fine, yes I’ve been in love.”
Score. “With who?”
His brows hit his hair, which isn’t difficult considering the length of it at the moment. The bottom brushes the base of his neck. I like it, it suits him. “It’s my question now.” Oh, right. “What’s the happiest memory you have?”
The cheek! “You can’t expect me to answer that!” So not fair.
“I can.”
Growl. “Meeting Caleb, best day of my life.”
His face is blank, I can’t see what he’s feeling and I’m not sure why I want to. “So not when he proposed?”
Hmm… “No, that’s number two on my list of favourite memories.” I turn my body towards him. “My turn. Who have you been in love with?”
“It was a while ago,” he says with a shrug. “I didn’t know her name.”
How’s that even possible?
“I used to see her walking a lot, around town. I never did pluck up the courage to talk to her,” his eyes glaze over for a moment, I wonder if he’s still in love with the memory of this girl. “It’s stupid, I should have done. I’ve regretted it ever since.”
“Why?” I know it’s not my turn but I need to know more.
His tongue dampens his lower lip. “Because I could have had what you and Caleb had. I missed out on that.”
“You’re still young, you could have that.”
His lips twitch, “Possibly. My turn, I get two questions.”
“Go for it,” I spur him on whilst staring at his profile.
“Okay,” his gloved fingers run through his longish locks. “Tell me about your parents.”
Hmm, where to begin. “I have no clue who my dad is. My mum says he knows I exist, saw me once and never came back.” He’s about to apologize, I cut him off because it’s really not a big deal. “My mum, she loves me in her own way and she’s always supported me with everything but this and the engagement. She wanted me to have the life she didn’t.”
“That I can relate to.”
“Hmm,” I bet he can. Poor Nathan. “I was always an inconvenience more than anything. She was never mean and I was always well dressed and never hungry, it was more duty than love though.” We share a moment’s silence, I’m wondering if he can relate to this too. “Caleb said his parents were great to him as he grew up, but his dad expected things of him that he didn’t want.”
“Yes, he was the apple of their eyes.”
Dare I tread? “Why weren’t they like that with you?” Yep, clearly I dare.
“Honestly?” He blows out a breath, his left arm flicking the indicator down. “I have no idea.”
“You’re not a failure Nathan,” I tell him but I can see he doesn’t believe me. I don’t expect him to. He’s been treated badly all of his life by the sounds of it, why would he believe my word over something that’s been drilled into him for god knows how long?
“Was Caleb your first?”
My mind is still spinning with thoughts when he asks this so I don’t click on immediately. When I do I choke on air. “That’s a personal question.”
“It’s the question I’m choosing.”
“Your questions are not nice questions.” I shrug a little. Whatever, I’m not ashamed. “Yes he was my first.” And I wish he could be my last, but I’m not stupid enough to make that promise. Time goes by and as much as the thought of sleeping with someone else repulses me, it’ll probably happen eventually.
Pulling myself from my thoughts I look at Nathan, mainly because his leather gloves are squeaking on the rubber wheel. He does this when he’s frustrated. Why’s he frustrated? “Your question.”
“Okay, how old were you when you lost your virginity?” My smile is cocky, two can play at this game.
“Young, I don’t remember,” oh he’s lying.
“You’re a terrible liar too.”
“I don’t want to play this game anymore.”
“Boring.”
“Bored,” he retorts and raises his chin defiantly. “Let’s just listen to the radio.”
He’s so secretive, it drives me crazy. Maybe that’s because I grew up with just me and my mum, it has made me eager to see how much greener the grass is on the other side. Or the opposite.
It doesn’t take long to get to the city even though we stop for lunch on the way. When we arrive we pull up outside an empty looking store on a busy street. Nathan helps me out of the car and pulls a ring of keys from his inner jacket pocket.
He first opens the shutters via a key hole i
n a small grey box beside the shutters. They slowly ascend, revealing two wide windows with a door in the middle. Next we step inside and I’m relieved to see it’s not dusty. Dust bugs the hell out of me.
From what I can see there are glass cases on top of dark wooden settings spread out around the room. Glass encased shelves line the walls. Even the counter is one long display box.
“What do you think?” He asks, worrying his lip between his teeth. “Think this is a good place to start?”
I nod slowly, observing the room, “I think it’s great. A little dull though.”
“Agreed, we need to set it apart from the rest.” We? “It opens in a few months hopefully, I’m just waiting on stock and staff and I need to expand my jewellery selection and find a supplier.”
“You’ll do great, Nathan,” I say honestly because I know he will. “Your jewellery is amazing.”
His cheeks pink slightly and for the second time since I’ve met him I get to see a sweet vulnerability -- that doesn’t seem to exist in a man like Nathan -- shine through. “I’m nervous.”
“You’re human,” I place my hand on his shoulder as he leans forward on the counter display case. “You’ll be fine, and if you’re not, you’ll still have me as your number one fan.”
He looks at me, a handsome smile on his face. “You’re a lovely person, Guinevere.”
“So are you, Nathan.”
“You bring that out in me,” his lips purse slightly. I can see he’s battling with himself on whether or not to say anything. “A few months ago I wanted to do this to destroy my dad’s business. A revenge mission so to speak. Because of my family name I know this will get attention, the son of a well-known business man branching out on his own. I wanted to bring him to his knees, make him regret the day he called me a failure.” I listen intently, wondering where he’s going with this. “And now…” he pauses and looks at me, his hands come up and cup my neck. “Now I just want to succeed to prove that I’m worth it.”
“You are worth it,” I stop myself from rolling my eyes. “You’re worth everything.” I’m not sure if this makes sense but I know what I’m talking about.