by EM Lynley
At the entrance, a security guard stopped them, and a stern-looking nurse who resembled Tony Perkins in Psycho foiled their escape, wheeled Kevin back to his room, and forbade his brothers from coming back in.
“Nicky!” he shouted past the nurse to the hallway. “Can you go to the hotel and bid on the gingerbread house for me? You still got that money for the chrome, right?”
“Yeah. Not on me.” Nicky shouted back from the hallway. “But you want us to use some of it for a gingerbread house?”
“Bid it all.”
“All of it? What about your car?”
“Forget the car. I’ll explain later. Go, hurry up.” He paused for a fraction of a second. “And don’t use my name!”
“I’ve got the squad car. Sirens on!” Tommy shouted, and he heard them running down the hall.
Chapter 8
KEVIN couldn’t sleep that night, and not only because someone came in every hour to check him due to the head injury. He had no phone, and the Iron Nurse wouldn’t let in any visitors. He had no idea whether his brothers had gotten to the auction on time or whether he even had enough to bid on the gingerbread house. When the first light trickled through the window, he glanced around the room. There were more cards and flowers and balloons than he’d remembered from the night before. And he smiled at the pile of stuffed turtles on the chair.
“You have a visitor who’s been waiting, though not very patiently.” Iron Nurse was still on duty? Maybe she had a twin. Or a clone. He’d definitely believe she might be a nursebot and not a real human being. “Let’s get you sitting up a little.” She wiped his face with a warm cloth. Maybe she was a little bit human after all.
A visitor? It would be too much to hope it was Alex.
He heard footsteps and a man entered. Kevin couldn’t turn his head to see who it was.
“How are you, Son?”
Dad. Talk about disappointment. It didn’t surprise him his father had waited this long to visit. As his dad moved into his line of vision, Kevin noticed him wearing his usual dress uniform. He was on duty, and he’d probably stopped at nearly every call that day. He also had his arms full of more flowers and balloons.
“I’m great, Dad. How ’bout a game of hoops?”
“You sound a lot better than you look.” He added the flowers to a pile on a guest chair and sat at the edge of Kevin’s bed. “Really, how are you?”
“Everything would hurt if they didn’t have good pills here.” He tried to smile, but a bandage on his face made it difficult. “Thanks for stopping by.”
“I came by twice yesterday, but you were sleeping. I can stay till your mom gets here. I think she’s sleeping in her car because they kicked her out of the waiting room.”
“She didn’t go home?” That sounded like his mom. “Tell her to go home.”
“You tell her yourself. She doesn’t listen to me.” His dad smiled. He looked really tired. Everyone was tired this time of year. “I’m glad you’re okay. You’re going to get a commendation for this. Your captain suggested the Medal of Valor.”
Kevin didn’t reply. That wasn’t why he did his job. “How’s the boy? And the woman?” He couldn’t remember their names.
“They’re fine. The boy’s going home today. Toby Reese. The nanny, Marta Dominguez, should be out in a day or two.”
“Thanks.”
His dad turned his head toward the door. “Someone else is here to visit. I’ll wait outside.”
“You don’t have to wait for Mom. Thanks for stopping by though.”
His dad reached out and squeezed his hand. He blinked a few times and his eyes got red. Kevin had never seen his dad cry. Maybe it was an allergy. He certainly wouldn’t cry over Kevin. Since that day his dad found him with Brian, he’d gotten little more than indifference on personal issues. Kevin considered the visit today part of his father’s official duties, not a man visiting his injured son.
His dad sniffled and squeezed his hand again as he stood. Maybe Kevin was wrong about the visit. He’d ask his mother later.
“Hey, Kevin.” Until the speaker came into his line of vision, he’d thought he’d identified the voice incorrectly.
Alex Bancroft stood at the edge of the bed looking down at him with tired eyes and a wide-eyed look Kevin had become familiar with from his visitors. He wore navy pants and a pale blue shirt open at the collar. Over one forearm he carried a navy suit jacket. Something that looked like a tie was stuffed into the shirt pocket. His clothes were rumpled, and his dark hair trickled into his eyes. Even the disheveled appearance looked good on him.
Kevin imagined how incredible he’d look with his suit and tie on properly. Alex was tall, with the kind of shoulders that looked good in a suit. He and Perez must have made quite a couple at the big auction party the night before. Was Alex stopping by on his way home from Perez’s apartment?
“Hi.” Kevin didn’t know what else to say.
Alex glanced around at the two chairs, full of gifts, then back toward the hall. “Uh, can I sit on the bed? Or should I bring in a chair.”
“Bed’s okay.”
Alex sat slowly, warily. “Is it going to hurt?”
“I’m on a lot of pain meds. I wouldn’t notice.”
Alex nodded and pressed his lips together until they were a pale line in his handsome face. He touched his chin, rubbing it unconsciously, then met Kevin’s gaze.
“Thank you. The phrase is so inadequate.”
“For what?”
“Bidding on the cake.”
“You weren’t supposed to know it was me.”
“Your brothers came running into the room practically shouting. It would have been impossible not to know.” He chuckled softly.
“Idiots can’t follow simple instructions.”
“Well, thanks. They didn’t know where you wanted it delivered.”
“I won?”
“Didn’t you know?”
“No. Wasn’t allowed a phone or visitors since last night.”
“Well, you won.” He smiled again. “I don’t recommend eating it all at once unless you’re going for a Guinness World Record.”
Is that why he came? Just to ask about the cake?
“No. That’s not the reason, Kevin.”
Shit, had he said that out loud? Kevin glanced away. Clearly this was one of the downsides of the drugs. He didn’t have as good a grip on reality as he’d thought. He glanced back into Alex’s eyes. Up close they looked as red and wet as his father’s. Alex reached out but stopped when his hand was a few inches from Kevin’s. He waited, then laid his hand on top. Kevin wished he didn’t enjoy the feel of Alex’s hand on his. The weight, the warmth, the memory.
“Kevin….” Alex swallowed hard. Kevin could see it. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry.”
They said the words almost at the same time. Alex laughed and caught Kevin’s eye again. This time he smiled, and it lit up the whole room. Just seeing it made Kevin’s heart feel light, and it might have fluttered once or twice.
“Can you take the cake to the children’s hospital or something? Sell pieces in your shop. You probably know the best way to use it.”
“I’ll take it to the hospital. If there’s any left, I’ll bring it to the shop. Thanks.” Alex nodded, then glanced at his hand on top of Kevin’s. He picked it up and put it back in his lap.
A gray cloud floated into Kevin’s light mood, but he managed a smile. “Can you take those turtles too? I fucking hate turtles.”
Alex laughed. He reached out toward Kevin’s hand again.
“Why did you decide to get the boy’s stuffed toy?”
Kevin tried to shrug, but he couldn’t with everything taped and bandaged. “When I was a kid, I had a toy I couldn’t let go of. I’m told I’d scream if anyone tried to take it away. Something about the way the boy—Toby—had it in his hand even as he struggled to breathe before passing out, well, it made me think he felt that way about the turtle.” As soon as the words wer
e out, Kevin wished he hadn’t told the story. He looked away from Alex, at the pile of stuffed turtles, and felt his face heat up.
“It’s hard picturing you as a little boy crying over a stuffed toy.” Alex grinned. “What was your toy?”
“No.”
Alex chuckled. “Come on, tell me.”
The way he looked when he smiled and laughed, Kevin would do anything to see that look, hear the sound. But not this. He shook his head.
“Okay for now. I’ll get it out of you eventually.”
Iron Nurse shouted from the doorway: “Five more minutes!”
Alex nodded. “I thought about what you asked me the other night. Sunday? Saturday? I can’t keep track now. Yes to both.”
“What did I ask?” Kevin really couldn’t remember.
“You asked me to forgive you for being such a jerk. You’ve definitely proven that it might not be your natural state. Besides, how could I not forgive a guy wrapped in bandages?”
Kevin grinned. It was like Christmas came early for him. Alex was talking to him again, and not just to insult him. “They’re mostly for show. I only stubbed my toe. Glad they can take these off now.”
“And if you’re still offering, I’d like to go for coffee or something and get to know you better. From scratch.”
“How do you feel about ballroom dancing?” Kevin waved his good hand as if he were dancing.
“Sounds like fun, but I was hoping I wouldn’t have to wait that long. Do you have plans for Christmas Eve?”
“That’s tonight, or have I completely lost track of time?”
“Tonight.”
Kevin turned up one corner of his mouth. “Before or after I play hockey?”
“Before.”
“No plans.”
“So, is it a date? Around seven?”
Date? Kevin thought the meds might have him hallucinating or hearing voices.
“Yeah, Kevin, a date.”
Kevin stared into Alex’s eyes until he believed it. “Maybe you better check with the Commandant. I have a feeling she’s in the doorway where I can’t see her.”
Alex grinned. “Yes, she is.” He glanced toward the door. “Five seconds?” To Kevin, “She said okay, but she’s throwing me out now. See you at seven.”
“Bye.” Kevin said, laughing. He held on to Alex’s hand as he stood and they exchanged a warm squeeze for a moment, as neither seemed willing to let go first. Then Alex released his grip and left. It wasn’t enough for Kevin, but it would have to do for now. Alex would be back later.
“Time to change your catheter,” the nurse said. He swore she had an evil grin on her face as he reached to pull up his hospital gown. “You know that boy stayed here all night waiting to see you?” she asked as she worked. He was grateful for the distraction.
“Really?”
“Yup. Slept in a chair in the waiting room. I sent him to the cafeteria for coffee this morning before I let him in here. Then when he came back, your father was already here. He let your dad come in to see you first. He’s very polite.” She pushed his gown back down. “All done. And I’m off duty. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She patted his hand gently and left.
Alex hadn’t spent the night with Perez after all. And the nurse was human. Plus, he had a date that night with Alex.
If he hadn’t just had a plastic tube shoved up his dick, he might have thought he’d died and gone to heaven after all.
TIME dragged on as he shifted in and out of sleep. His mother spent most of the day with him, and a steady parade of on- and off-duty firefighters streamed through. A nurse collected all the stuffed toys, and he asked her to take the flowers to the cancer ward patients. Not that he wasn’t grateful, but the place had more flowers than a florist, and it was getting embarrassing.
Before his mother left at six thirty, she helped him look a little more presentable for his date and rearranged the sheets over him. After she left, the butterflies went wild in his stomach. Why was he so damn nervous about this? All they’d do was eat dinner—the nurse had arranged to serve his after Alex arrived, outside of the hospital’s usual meal hours.
He shook the worries and fears away. Why was it easier to go into a burning building than talk to the guy he realized he was crazy about? He’d never met anyone so kindhearted and generous before, and he worked with a lot of bighearted people who risked their lives for others every day. Kevin used to think you needed to be in public service, a firefighter or cop, to really give to other people. If you didn’t risk something, it wasn’t enough. Yet Alex shone above them. He’d risked himself for someone else when he was just a kid, and he’d come through that determined to keep helping total strangers.
He’d been open and giving in bed too, and Kevin pushed out his own unforgiveable behavior as he remembered everything Alex had said and done. He wouldn’t even consider the possibility of reliving any of that again, and certainly not for a long time, even if they managed to hit it off tonight.
“Knock, knock,” Alex said from the door and moved into Kevin’s view. He rolled a cart with a white tablecloth and several silver-domed dishes, like a room-service waiter. Then he came around, and Kevin realized he was wearing a tuxedo. Had Alex really gone through so much effort just for him?
“Wow, knockout is more like it.” He liked the way Alex smiled at the compliment. He had one of those dimples too, when he was embarrassed, and it was adorable.
“Thanks. You look stunning too. I love what you did with that sheet.”
“Usually I like to wear more clothing for a first date, but….”
Alex’s dimple appeared again as he sat down on the edge of the bed. “I guess it really doesn’t matter that much, considering we’ve already had sex.” His tone was flirty and light and put Kevin at ease. He had worried about dealing with that fact. Thankfully, Alex had defused the situation.
“I don’t put out on the first date, so don’t expect anything tonight,” Kevin joked back.
“I’ll just pencil it in, then, right after the ballroom dancing and hockey, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Now for dinner. I didn’t know what you liked, so I asked some experts, including your mother and guys from your shift. They all had different answers.”
Kevin laughed. How mortifying that Alex had talked to his mother! “You brought food? I thought we were going to be eating hospital food tonight.”
“I know technically you asked me out, but I decided to spring for dinner. I hope you don’t mind. I know you Alpha types don’t like to give up much control.”
“I’m glad. I was considering going on a hunger strike just to avoid the food here.”
“Well you won’t need to eat for a few days after this dinner. I brought some of your favorite things. Pizza from Zachary’s—grilled chicken and artichoke hearts. Prime rib from Houlihan’s and sushi from that place with no name that has a neon fish in the window. Does any of that sound good?”
“Everything sounds good. Can you grab the bed control? They raise it up a little more for me to eat.”
“I’ll do it.” Alex grabbed the device and pushed a few buttons. Kevin’s head lowered while the foot of the bed rose. “Crap, wrong button.” Alex tried a few more combinations, none of which worked. They both burst out laughing as he kept trying to correct the position of the bed. “Last one. If this doesn’t work I’ll send an SOS to the nurses’ desk.”
Luckily, it did. But Kevin’s stomach hurt so much from laughing he wasn’t particularly hungry. He had tears streaming down his cheeks, but he didn’t care. So did Alex.
“You okay, Kevin?”
“Yes. That was a fun ride.”
“Luckily, it was before dinner and not after.” That set them both chuckling again. “Now let’s start with the prime rib.”
“Okay.”
Alex served a piece of beef and some vegetables and fancy-looking roasted potatoes and put the plate on the rolling food tray. Then he opened a bottle of fizzy apple cider.
&n
bsp; “They wouldn’t let me bring champagne, and this is the next best thing.”
“Not exactly, but I appreciate the thought.”
They made a little toast and took a sip, and then Kevin grabbed the fork and realized he couldn’t cut the meat on his own.
“I can help you,” Alex said.
Kevin liked the way he phrased that so he didn’t feel so damn helpless. Alex cut the meat into bite-sized pieces. The vegetables and potatoes were small enough. “Thanks.” Kevin stabbed at the meat with the fork. He was right-handed, and that was the arm in a cast. He hadn’t yet mastered left-handed eating.
“I can help with that too.” Alex said.
Kevin felt himself coloring at needing help from his date to eat dinner. He opened his mouth when Alex offered a piece of beef on the fork. It was delicious. Better than delicious. Melt-in-your-mouth tender and juicy. “I’ll bet you didn’t expect to have a date with a five-year-old did you?”
“I like kids.” Alex took a bite of his own dinner, then gave Kevin another mouthful.
Between the prime rib and the pizza, Kevin steeled his nerves to ask the one thing still hanging over the evening. “So, Bobby Perez didn’t mind you coming by?”
Alex stopped serving pizza and turned back to Kevin. “I don’t think Bobby and I are a good fit. He’s nice, very sweet, and he’s fun….”
“Completely the opposite of me?”
“In some ways, yes. But the whole evening at the auction, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I didn’t give him the kind of date he expected or deserved. And I don’t think either of us wants to give it another shot.”
“But now you know I’m okay, you don’t want to try again with Perez?”
“I knew you were okay last night. That’s not why I was thinking about you.” He paused and looked at his knees before continuing. “I felt really guilty. I worried you did something risky in that building—saving the kid—to prove something to me. Because I told you I would never respect you until you did something special.” He still looked away, but Kevin thought he saw a wet glint in the corner of Alex’s eye.
“I’m probably going to shoot myself in the foot by telling you that when I was on the call yesterday, doing my job, I didn’t think about you or anything you said to me. At a scene, I have to put 100 percent of my focus on what I’m doing. I hope that doesn’t offend you.”