Planning on Prince Charming

by Lizzie Shane

  She couldn’t matter. He couldn’t want her. He was just a broken guy looking for glue to put him back together where none existed.

  Miranda’s voice sounded through his earpiece, prompting him to wrap things up as Daniel slipped the final ring onto Brittany’s finger. Josh stepped forward, saying the usual things, going through the usual motions—all without glancing once in Sidney’s direction. Professionalism. That was the name of the game.

  When he finished his standard speech—which the viewers at home could probably recite without him by now—he nodded to Daniel and the ladies, refusing to let his gaze linger on anyone in particular, then turned and strode out toward the terrace as a trio of production interns rushed forward with trays full of champagne for the post-Elimination party.

  He didn’t look back.

  Chapter Seven

  Brahms rolled off the piano like a tidal wave of sound as Sidney rested her forehead against the window, staring across the grounds to where just the roofline of the Mister Perfect mansion was visible through the trees. Caitlyn had said she was a piano teacher. What she had failed to mention was that she was also a world famous former child prodigy concert pianist. Only the best for Mister Perfect.

  Caitlyn was beyond brilliant—and since music was how she de-stressed and Marrying Mister Perfect was nothing if not a constant stress factory, Sidney had been treated to a lot of free concerts in the last three weeks.

  She would miss the music. And Caitlyn.

  Ever since the last Elimination Ceremony, a decision had been solidifying in her mind. She’d never had much respect for the girls who left before they were kicked off by Mister Perfect. Sabotaging their chance at love, not respecting the opportunity they’d been given, protecting their dignity at the expense of their romantic forever. But now, from inside the bubble, everything looked different.

  Maybe leaving was the romantic thing to do.

  She could stay. The exotic travel dates would be beginning soon. She could use Daniel as her passport to Asia or South America or wherever the show was taking them this season. She could bide her time until he was done weeding out the crazy fame-hungry girls and got down to the business of selecting the ones he had the most feelings for…

  But the truth was she still believed in the show too much to do that. The idea of even one girl who had genuine feelings for Daniel going home because Sidney was taking up space out of a selfish desire to see Rome went against every romantic bone in her body.

  The rolling tide of Brahms crashed to a close and Sidney turned away from the window, applauding as Caitlyn lifted her hands from the keys. The redhead grinned, an easy comfortable smile that was never in evidence when the cameras were in sight.

  There were hidden cameras in this room, as there were in every room of the house except the bathrooms, but at least without the blinking red lights they could pretend they weren’t being filmed. While the other girls were fighting for their fifteen minutes of fame, she and Caitlyn had bemoaned the lack of privacy.

  They’d bonded over that—and their overbearing mothers and childhoods ruled by etiquette rather than affection. Sidney really would miss her. And worry about her. Part of her was tempted to stay just so her friend wouldn’t be alone.

  “Are you happy here, Caitlyn?”

  “I’m not unhappy.” Caitlyn ran through fingerings, little snatches of music erupting in staccato bursts from the instrument. “And I believe it’ll get better. This part of the show is what we put up with for the chance at something amazing. Why? Are you unhappy?”

  “I don’t know,” Sidney admitted. “I guess I thought it would be more… romantic.”

  She’d counted on a connection with Daniel, counted on that early-relationship excitement and infatuation to carry her through the stressful parts early in the show until real feelings could develop, but without those giddy feelings… waiting around for weeks on end, hiding in the music room with Caitlyn, running laps around the estate and entertaining herself as best she could as she waited to see whether Prince Charming would deign to grace her with his presence that week… it was hardly how she’d envisioned her fairy tale.

  Catching Caitlyn’s skeptical look, she grimaced. “I know it’s stupid to think reality television could be romantic. I knew everything was staged and planned. But I’ve watched the show a thousand times and I’ve seen the girls who get that look in their eyes when they see Mister Perfect. You can’t fake that—or maybe some of them can, but not all. Some girls really do fall for him and I thought, why can’t I be one of those? I knew that the television aspect of it would be weird and crazy, but I watched Marcy and Craig last season. Both of them admitted they weren’t really looking for love, but they were so perfect for each other they couldn’t resist destiny. And I guess I thought—stupidly romantic though it may be—that Daniel could be my destiny.”

  “But you don’t think that now?” Caitlyn asked. She picked out an ascending, questioning riff on the piano.

  “I don’t know. Other girls are talking about love and forever, but I feel like I’ve barely even met him.”

  She wasn’t even sure she liked him. Let alone wanted to fall in love with him.

  They’d barely spoken on their last date. The producers had arranged for them to go to a beer garden where Sidney and five other Suitorettes had dressed up in German barmaid outfits and trotted around the stage doing a little dance, embarrassing themselves on command for the show.

  Daniel had hooted and applauded louder than the rest of the audience, eating up the fact that six beautiful women were making fools of themselves for him. After the performance, the producers had scheduled time for Daniel to have a beer with each Suitorette in an intimate one-on-one setting—but since Sidney was the last Suitorette on the agenda and Daniel hadn’t limited himself to just one beer during each one-on-one, he was drunk enough by the time he got to her that his conversation was limited to slurred praise of her appearance and sloppy attempts to steal a kiss.

  As he’d planted a hoppy kiss on her mouth, she couldn’t help remembering the lingering taste of bad scotch on Josh’s lips and the scent of his expensive cologne.

  “Don’t worry about how his relationships with the other girls are progressing,” Caitlyn advised. “You’ll just make yourself crazy. Focus on what you have with him.”

  What if we don’t have anything? “What about your relationship with him?” Sidney asked. “Do you care about him?”

  Caitlyn flushed and looked down at her hands. “I don’t know. When I’m with him, it’s easy to get caught up in the moment.”

  Sidney studied that blush. Caitlyn was enamored, no denying it. Sidney could stay—but what if her staying meant Caitlyn went home? Caitlyn who was a thousand times sweeter than she was—and beautiful and brilliant and talented and deserved her own fairy tale ending.

  Caitlyn, who blushed when she thought about Daniel.

  Even as Sidney was trying not to blush every time she thought about Josh.

  “I never get caught up in the moment with Daniel,” she admitted. “Things are only getting more awkward with him. The last time he kissed me, I pictured someone else.”

  “Oh.” Caitlyn’s hands left the piano. “Who?”

  As much as she wanted to tell Caitlyn about everything that had happened with Josh, cameras were everywhere and if she confided in her friend he could lose his job. “It isn’t important.”

  “You aren’t… are you thinking of…leaving?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe I’m just in the way of someone else’s happy ending here.”

  She’d never expected that going home would be the romantic thing to do, but if she really believed in love maybe it was time.

  Maybe it was ridiculous to expect that she would feel infatuation at first sight for Daniel, ridiculous to put this pressure on her emotions, but when the other girls were falling head over heels and she was just idling along at friendship—on a good day—it was hard to rationalize staying.

  And all to
o easy to make up her mind to go.

  Even Elena—the self-proclaimed villainess of the season—seemed to feel more for him than she did. She actually wanted to get the guy. Whereas Sidney couldn’t even remember why she was here.

  If it was meant to be, wouldn’t something be holding her here?

  Josh’s face flashed in her mind.

  She got caught up in the moment with him—but was that just her letting lust screw her out of a shot at real love? Or could there really be something there? Was it possible he felt the same way?

  He’d said that if she behaved with Daniel the way she behaved with him that Daniel wouldn’t be able to help loving her. Had that been just a nice thing to say or had he been trying to tell her something?

  “Stay one more week,” Caitlyn coaxed. “You owe it to yourself to be sure. Make sure you get some alone time with him. And maybe talk about how you’re feeling. I bet he’ll tell you he wants you to stay.”

  “Maybe.” But it wasn’t Daniel she was thinking of.

  *

  The door was locked.

  Elena had said it wasn’t always open, but Sidney hadn’t even considered what she would do if she couldn’t sneak over to see Josh until she was pushing ineffectually at the locked door between the two estates.

  “Crap.”

  How was she supposed to find out if he was secretly in love with her now?

  She could stay a few days longer, keep trying the door, but now that she’d thought of leaving the show, the idea had taken root in her mind and refused to give up its hold. When she pictured her future, there was only one man she envisioned and it wasn’t Mister Perfect.

  He couldn’t be with her when she was a Suitorette, so maybe it was time for her to be brave and make the big romantic gesture of walking away from the show for him. Maybe he was waiting for her to give him that sign.

  What would Cinderella do?

  A giddy confidence bubbled like champagne in her blood at the thought of telling Josh how she felt.

  Maybe Sidney wasn’t such a coward after all.

  Chapter Eight

  “Josh, we need you at the Suitorette Mansion. Exit interview.”

  He looked up from the fan mail he’d been answering, frowning at the intern in his dressing room doorway. “Now?”

  It was four o’clock in the afternoon and the next Elimination Ceremony wasn’t until tomorrow night. It wasn’t unheard of for a Suitorette to decide to call it quits, but usually she waited until a particularly dramatic moment to maximize screen time. Mid-afternoon departures on uneventful days were anathema to reality television drama.

  “ASAP.” The intern—Cadence, if he remembered correctly—shifted impatiently from foot to foot with the urgency of someone who knew Miranda would chew her ass if she didn’t get Josh on set in the next thirty seconds. “She’s already done the confessional and talked to Daniel. Pulled him aside when he was dropping Samantha off at the Suitorette Mansion after the Grand Canyon date.”

  Josh stood, taking quick stock of his appearance and unbuttoning his wrinkled shirt to change it out for the crisply pressed lavender button-down his wardrobe consultant had left hanging beside the mirror. “Who is it?”

  “Sidney.”

  Shit. He bobbled the hanger, but years of experience kept his expression impassive as it clattered to the countertop. “Sidney?” Thank God his voice stayed steady. “Miss Happily-Ever-After herself? I thought she was in it for the long haul.”

  “You’re telling me. I had twenty bucks on her to make final three.”

  “Don’t let Miranda hear you betting on the results. That’s a firing offense.”

  Cadence paled. “I didn’t… Trent was starting a pool—”

  “Relax. I won’t tell the dragon lady.” Josh finished buttoning up and straightened his collar. “But if Trent’s still taking bets, tell him I’ve got a C-note on Samantha, Elena, and Caitlyn for the trifecta.”

  He tossed her one last reassuring grin and strode out of his dressing room and up the stairs of the Mister Perfect Mansion. He climbed out of the basement lair where the crew had their onsite offices as well as rooms to crash out when the hours were too crazy to allow time to go home to sleep. Several of the producers practically lived at the mansion during filming, but thankfully Josh’s role as the “talent” gave him a slightly more humane schedule.

  Usually by this time of day, his work was done—except for Elimination nights. He was only still on set this afternoon because Daniel had another date this evening and Josh was waiting to film the pre-date chat before he headed home for the day.

  Pure dumb luck he was on hand for the exit interview.

  Sidney.

  Shit.

  He’d fucked up her fairy tale. She’d been glowing with enthusiasm about the whole process that night when they’d talked in his room. A woman clearly in love with love. He’d thought she would at least make it to the first Meet-the-In-Laws date. But then he’d somehow imprinted on her and she was calling it quits.

  He liked her. Of course he liked her, she was very likable—but that was where it ended. If she thought he was a better bet than Daniel in the happy-ever-after lottery, she was wildly delusional. Josh was a man going through the motions of life, subsisting on charm—and no one noticed because charm was all anyone saw when they looked at him. Sidney needed to wake up and realize that it took more than charm to make a happy ending. He was living proof of that.

  Josh moved quickly along the path that connected the two properties, past the security check-points and through the elaborate landscaping toward the massive Suitorette Mansion. One of the cast handlers caught his eye and waved him toward the front drive.

  He rounded the house and saw her, a lean, leggy blonde, already standing on the granite pavers with a single symbolic suitcase resting at her side. The rest of her luggage was doubtless being collected by the crew and packed off-camera into the back of the SUV that would take her home.

  She really was leaving. The thought hit him strangely, seeming to squeeze his chest.

  Miranda caught sight of him and waved him over as a team of sound, hair and makeup people descended on him to clip on his mic, poke a receiver in his ear, and make him camera-ready from the neck up.

  “Just the basics,” Miranda said with her usual brisk efficiency. “We have good footage from her talk with Daniel—she just isn’t feeling a connection, she doesn’t want to get in the way of someone else’s happy ending—the usual jazz. But her confessional footage is really minimal and I don’t want this to seem like it came completely out of the blue. So let’s make sure we’ve covered all the bases. You know the drill. Get all the sound bites you can. You ready to roll?”

  “Aren’t I always?” he lied, smooth, charming and fake.

  Josh turned toward the woman waiting on the driveway.

  He’d done his share of exit interviews over the years. The vast majority of them were with girls fresh off a very public and humiliating rejection. Nearly all of them had been sobbing—even several of those who had chosen to leave of their own volition—but Sidney was all elegant composure as she stood, shoulders squared, slim and proud on the granite pavers, with her straight blonde hair in a long loose fall down her back.

  Josh approached, his most understanding camera smile in place. “I hear you’ve decided to leave us.”

  The producers had her facing the house, but she turned toward him at the sound of his voice, lifting those teal eyes to his face. Something in his chest went tight, but he ruthlessly suppressed the feeling. Whatever it was. He didn’t need to be feeling anything for the Suitorettes except professionalism.

  That unwanted feeling sparked another—relief. He couldn’t be the guy who had inappropriate feelings for a Suitorette, and if she was gone, he wouldn’t be.

  He thought he’d done a good job of masking it. Even Miranda—who seemed to have a sixth sense about all things scandalous or romantic—hadn’t given him so much as a suspicious look since the last Elimination
Ceremony.

  Now Sidney looked up at him with something unreadable in her eyes. “It seemed like it was time.”

  “I know it can be hard here, but are you sure this is what you want? These opportunities don’t come along every day.”

  “I think it’s the right thing to do,” she answered. The camera operators moved fluidly around them, framing up the best shots. “I think the other girls have more genuine connections with Daniel. He doesn’t have the first idea who I am—”

  “So give him time to get to know you—”

  “I’m not sure he wants to. And being here, being part of this process, has really taught me to listen to my instincts…” Her gaze probed his and he suddenly realized what it was he was seeing in her eyes. Hope.

  Shit. “Sidney…”

  “If I’m honest I think I’ve realized that my heart is leading me in another direction.”

  Dread punched into the back of his heart, making his chest hurt. He didn’t want to hurt her, but he couldn’t care. Not for her. Even if he hadn’t been beyond hope romantically—his heart officially closed for business—she was a Suitorette. End of story.

  “I planned on coming here and falling in love, but you can’t plan who you want,” she went on. “I think maybe I was meant to come here, but not for Daniel—”

  “I just want you to be one hundred percent certain you’re making the right decision,” he interrupted before she could make any declarations that would kill his career. He firmed his jaw. Merciless. That was the only way he’d get through this with his future intact. “You have Daniel here and he’s open to love. He’s ready for it. He’s looking for it. If you stay here, you can still give it a shot with him. But if you go… I just don’t want you to regret chasing some dream guy when that guy doesn’t want you back.” He held her gaze meaningfully. “Some guy who feels nothing for you.”

  “Nothing,” she echoed—the hope in her eyes going into rigor mortis.

  He’d expected disappointment to fall over her features, but it was still hard to watch it happen. “Think about this Sidney. Daniel—”