When I didn’t turn back and answer, Ace put the truck in drive again and pulled back onto the road.
The worst part was that Ace’s words made me think. They made me pick apart everything he said and analyze it for the truth. So what, they decided to protect me? Didn’t any brother or best friend do that? And so what, they at one point thought that they loved me. It couldn’t have been love, because love, real love, makes you crazy and selfish. You wanted to be with that person so badly that you forsook the consequences. You jumped in with both feet, hoping that you’d find yourself sinking so deep inside the other person that you welcomed drowning with open arms.
Ace’s voice broke the silence. “Aiden and Eli were the first to admit how they felt about you the summer between eighth and ninth grade. Do you remember that summer?”
My mind shifted back to those days. Aiden and Eli had started to pick at each other and at one point, they were always trying to show each other up. That didn’t mean anything though, right? They were boys. Didn’t boys always feel the need to one-up each other like some kind of male dominance thing?
Ace took my silence in stride, giving me a few minutes to process what he’d said. “Then Jared figured out what the deal was when he made a comment about how much you’d grown up that summer, and Mark just about broke his nose.”
A flash of Jared popped into my thoughts. He’d said they’d been wrestling before I’d got out to the cabin. Looking back on the memory, I thought about how everyone had acted that day. They’d been broody and snarled a lot at each other. Again, I’d just passed it off.
“And then right before we started school, you and I were out helping Old Man Willis, and there was something about you. I don’t know if it was your laugh or the fact that you’d just witnessed a colt being born for the first time, but you turned to me, and the sunlight hit the side of your face, and I swear it was like… You smiled at me. That was all it took. You had me from that damn moment on. None of us have been the same. I knew right then and there that you’d be our undoing if we didn’t do something about it. You meant too much to all of us to let our feelings get in the way of the friendship we have with you. You were too important to us. It was my idea and my fault that you’re so upset, Riley. Be mad at me, but please, don’t turn your back on them.”
I gripped the door handle tight and fought to control my voice. “Ace, please tell me that they’ve gotten over me. Please tell me that I’m not going to have to walk away from them, because I can’t hurt them. It would kill me if I hurt them.”
“Riley, all of that…” he said, jerking his thumb towards the back window of my truck. “All of it was years ago. They’ve all come to terms with how they feel. Most of them were over it within the first week of high school. We shoulda never done that… opened that stupid box with you there. It would have saved all of this from coming out. It would have been buried in the past where most of it remains.”
“What do you mean by most of it?” I wanted to recall my question back after I asked it. It was like I just wanted to see how far I could dig myself and the situation into the ground. They were all going their separate ways—we were all supposed to be going our separate ways after graduation. How had things got so turned upside down and sideways? How did I allow myself to fall so deep into the feelings I had for Ace? He was supposed to be the one who’d be around the most. He was going to be just up the road, like always, when I came back on college breaks. What the hell was wrong with that? Nothing and everything now.
“…Riley.”
I only caught my name. Ace had said something, and I missed it because I was too busy mentally kicking my own ass. Beating myself up on everything that I’d thought was a truth, but ended up being a lie. The last four years had been an illusion.
Ace’s hand slid along my jaw, and he stood in front of me. When had he stopped the truck and how did I get out?
“Riley, please baby, you have to breathe.” He forced my eyes to meet his, as he cupped my face and looked down at me. My chest tightened and ached, as I heaved to collect a breath that wasn’t making it down into my lungs.
“Riley, focus on me, look at me… I’m right here with you. You have to calm down.” His face wavered in front of me, and I caught a glimpse of true fear. I blinked once, twice, and static filled the inside of my head—like an antenna TV with its volume turned up as far as it would go.
“RILEY!” I HEARD PAIGE SHOUT as the front door slammed shut. Her footsteps raced up the stairs to my room, and my door flew open. I blinked at the fuzziness that clung to my dreams. I hurt from head to toe and winced as I tried to sit up. A groan escaped from under the covers next to me.
“Go away, Paige.” Ace’s voice was muffled under the layers of blankets that he’d cocooned himself in.
Paige shot me an, ‘I can’t freakin’ believe you’ look and stormed over to rip the covers from my bed. When she saw Ace fully clothed, she sighed deeply and turned to look at me. “I didn’t believe it when Mark called me and said Ace brought you home, but didn’t show back up at the cabin. Care to explain why you have one of the Sexy Six in your bed?”
Ace sat up, snatched the covers, and rolled over on his side. “Go yell at someone else. It’s been a helluva night, and I don’t wanna hear it.”
“Shut up, Ace! You have no right to go all assholish on me. I’ve been worried sick about her all night!”
Ace sat up and ran his hand down his face. He looked over at me, and I watched as his eyes raked me from head to toe. Paige blew out a breath that said she was about to start in again.
Ace held himself upright on one arm and scowled at Paige. “You’ve been worried? Were you here when she had the mother of all panic attacks? Did you have to calm her down? Did you sit up with her all night when she flipped her shit and cried for half the night?”
I hadn’t done that. Had I? I pulled on Ace’s arm until he looked down at me. “What happened?”
“The meds Eli gave you kicked in, and you kinda flipped out about everything.” His eyes closed and then he sighed deeply when Paige continued yelling.
“Well, excuse me, Mr. I’m-not-in-the-mood! How the hell was I supposed to know what happened? You answered your phone once when Mark called you and you told him to fuck off and leave you alone, that you’d call them in the morning. What were they supposed to think? What was I supposed to think when Mark called me, freaking the hell out, because you didn’t answer the phone again and Riley’s went right to voice mail?”
My eyes bounced between them, not sure what to even think about the argument they were caught in.
“Mark wanted to know if you’d brought her into the ER when he called me. Do you even know what was running through my mind at that point? You’re a real jackass, Ace. And FYI? You’re not the only one who cares about her.”
Paige crossed her arms and glared at him.
A low rumble came from Ace, like a sinister laugh, and I knew he’d geared up to give her hell. He’d say something he could never take back and the rest of our circle of friendship would burn to the ground if he unleashed the words brewing in his head.
I turned and put my hand on his arm. His eyes snapped to mine, and I flinched at the anger I saw there. “Please, just don’t say anything else.”
He sighed, shoved himself up, and came around me on the mattress. Stopping in front of me, he blinked slowly, as if to clear the anger from his face while he looked at me. “I’ll be downstairs if you need me.”
He pushed off the bed and stalked past Paige. She turned to watch him leave. As soon as she heard his footsteps on the stairs, she spun on me. “What the hell is going on, Riley?”
I crisscrossed my legs and put my head in my hands. How could I explain it to Paige? If I told her what happened the night before, it would break the trust of the Six. If I didn’t tell her, it would make her angry with me. I had to find some sort of middle ground.
“Please tell me you didn’t sleep with Ace.” She crossed the room and sat down on th
e bed beside me. Her hands gripped the side of the mattress, and she waited for me to explain.
I rolled my eyes at her. “Of course I slept with Ace. You just saw it for yourself when you pulled the covers off him in my bed.”
She slapped my knee. “You know what I meant, Riley.”
“Yeah, I know, but would it really make a difference either way if I had slept with him in the way you’re implying?” I was tired of caring what others thought. Who cared if I decided to sleep with Ace? I was an adult, making adult decisions. It was my body, my life, and if I decided to give that to Ace, it would be between us and no one else. I never got in the middle of their love lives. Never once said a word when I knew they were sleeping with different girls and choosing not to make some sort of commitment. Paige was the only one out of my group of friends who was anything like me. Hell, even Ace was guilty of it. The guys never stuck with someone to see whether the relationship would last. It never made sense, but it wasn’t my business to ask them.
Paige bumped her arm into mine. “Why do you torture yourself like this, Riley?”
I snorted at her question. “You tell me what I’m supposed to do, Paige, ’cause right now, I’m scared, I’m frustrated, and I love him so damn much my insides hurt. He’s leaving. And I don’t know when he’s coming back. And I’ll be stuck here trying to figure out just what the hell I’m supposed to do with my life.” My words died off with my purge of hurt-filled words. Paige leaned into me and rested her head against mine.
“I knew you loved him. Why’d you wait so long to say something?”
“To who? You?” I asked.
“No, to him. To Ace.”
“I didn’t tell him, Paige. He doesn’t need to know.”
“The hell I don’t.” Ace’s voice rolled across the room, and my head snapped up to where he stood with his fingers curled around the doorframe. Paige shot up off my bed and backed up a step when Ace pushed himself off the door and stalked towards me.
I heard Paige, but I didn’t take my eyes off Ace. “I’ll call you later, Riley. Turn on your phone!” Her footsteps pounded down the stairs, and the front door slammed shut.
I swallowed hard and tried to catch my breath, as my chest tightened with each step that brought him closer to me. A fire burned in his eyes. It threatened to engulf me when he stopped in front of me and brought his hands up to cup my face. His eyes snapped like live wires. “You fucking own me, Riley, and there isn’t a thing I can do to walk away from you.” His lips hovered against mine, and he pulled in a deep breath. When he released it, it bathed my face and sent a shock wave through me from head to toe.
“Tell me this is okay, Riley. Tell me you want me as much as I want you.”
I trembled in his hold and licked my lips, as I struggled against how to respond to him. I’d wanted him for what felt like forever, but what happened after he left? Was I supposed to just pick up the pieces and be thankful he gave me a part of himself?
“Riley, you have to tell me, baby. I don’t know what you want, and I’m dying here. I need you, Riley. I need you so bad.”
I slammed the door shut on my thoughts and sought out Ace’s lips. He groaned into my mouth and lowered us to the bed. His body hovered over mine, as he kept one hand along my face and nipped at my lips. His kisses were a slow torture, which he dragged out as he drove me crazy with just his lips and his hands. He rested his weight on me, keeping his chest from pushing against mine. Even lost in the passion he’d created, he’d kept himself in check enough to be cautious of my back. I didn’t want him to be careful. I wanted him wild and crazy, and so far past thinking that he was as lost as I was.
He pulled back and I sighed, missing his lips against mine. “Look at me, Riley.”
I cracked my eyes open, as heat spread out along my cheeks. I’d never been so open with anyone. Ever.
“You have to tell me to stop, right now, or I might hurt you.”
I grabbed his neck and pulled him down against me. He tried to push himself back up, but I moved my legs apart so that he fell into the vee of my hips. I wrapped my legs around him, locking him against me, pressing him against the parts of me that ached for his touch. He groaned, as our lips met in a hungry kiss that had me gasping when he moved against me. Breaking the kiss, he rested his forehead against mine. His heartbeat thundered against my chest, as his hips arched against me. I spoke in a voice so breathless that it seemed to drive him crazy. “I want you, Jake.”
My shirt was pulled off in one quick sweep, my bra next, and then he stood me up. His thumbs hooked under the waist of my sweatpants, and he lowered them, trailing his hand down my leg until he pulled them free. His slow path back up my body was trailed with kisses until he stood in front of me. Stepping back, he went to pull his shirt off, but I put my hand over his, pulling the material from his grip. He shivered when my fingers trailed over his skin as I slid it up. As soon as it was over his head, he leaned in and nipped at my lips, reaching for the button of his jeans.
His knuckles slid against my stomach, leaving goose bumps, as his zipper lowered. I stepped back, giving him enough room to slide his pants down. They fell to the ground, and he kicked them away. His chiseled abs quivered with each labored breath, and then he pulled me against him. My world tilted with the feel of the cool sheets under my back, as Ace laid me down, sliding himself on top of me. With one arm braced, he leaned over, grabbed his wallet, flipped it open, and pulled out a condom.
I fought to keep my breathing normal. I didn’t want Ace to see what I was feeling and think it was fear. I didn’t want him to shut down and walk away from me. Closing my eyes, I ran my hand up his side when I heard the package crinkle.
Ace sat up for a second before lowering himself back down on top of me, touching me, placing kisses along my jaw and down my neck, along my chest. Before I knew it, I was lost in the storm we’d created. Our bodies fit together like we’d been made for one another, and I hung on when he joined us, making us one. His name rushed past my lips, and he shuddered as he called out mine. The weight of his body pressed me into the mattress as we trembled together.
I WOKE TO ACE TRAILING his fingers along my arm, as he kissed my forehead. When he noticed me smiling at him, he wrapped his arms around me. My back protested, and I winced. “Sorry, Riles.” He blew out a sigh and pulled back to look at me. After all we’d done, the telltale blush of embarrassment couldn’t be held back as it flooded my cheeks.
Ace grinned and shifted us so that he leaned over me. He kissed me repeatedly before groaning and pulling away. “Let me get you some aspirin or something. You’re gonna be really sore if not.” He winced as he ran his hand over my shoulder, pulling me on my side to look at my back. His fingers slipped across my skin so light that it brought on a shiver. Ace pressed a kiss to my shoulder with a low, rumbled laugh that vibrated into me all the way to my core.
My skin prickled in awareness when he pulled back, looking down at me. There was so much that passed between us without words. Too many feelings, which were raw and explosive, brewed in the air. Ace’s heavy-lidded gaze made my breath hitch, and he pulled me against him, kissing a path down my neck. We were losing ourselves again, and I melted into the moment—starved for what only he could give me. He leaned into me until his body pressed against mine, quivering as he lost control. The heated silence broke when Ace’s phone rang over and over, both of us ignoring it, hoping whoever called would hang up. The phone silenced as Ace settled lengthwise against me and leaned over the bed for his wallet. Shuddering in anticipation, I looked my fill at him. He was my first, and with the way I felt about him, he’d be my only. No one would be as perfect for me as he was. When I ran my fingers over his chest, he groaned and fumbled with his wallet. A sigh rippled through him when he righted himself and ripped the package open. He sat up long enough to slip the condom on, lowering himself onto his elbows and kissing me long and hard.
Ace’s phone went off again, the sound mixed with our heavy breathing. He growled a
gainst my lips when it continued ringing. Whoever it was, they were adamant about reaching him. Ace lifted himself up slightly and placed light kisses to my lips as his hand blindly sought out the phone. When he found it, he turned it off. I smiled against his lips when he tossed it on the floor. “What if it was important?” I asked when he moved his lips along my jaw and buried his face in my neck.
Ace leaned on his elbow and brought his hand up to my face, brushing my hair away from my cheek. “Right now, nothing is more important than me loving you.”
His soft words broke something inside of me—an emotion I’d shoved so far back inside of myself that it rushed out, and tears spilled from the corners of my eyes. Ace leaned in and kissed me. It was tender. A kiss between lovers that went beyond soul deep. I wrapped my hand around his neck and pressed myself against him, telling him with my body how much I needed him.
His tenderness broke, and it was the most intense thing I’d ever felt. The most wild and reckless I’d ever been in my entire life, and I didn’t want to be any other way with him.
Ace rocked his body against mine, calling my name out on a growl that rumbled through me. It was the most erotic sound I’d ever heard, and it sent me over the edge with him.
His head leaned against mine, as our bodies stilled. He placed a kiss to my forehead and slid over to lie beside me, placing a kiss over my racing heart before laying his head on my chest. His hand splayed against my stomach, as his labored breaths evened out. Running my fingers through his short, brown hair, warmth spread through me. I felt loved—complete—because of Ace.
“Riley?” Ace’s fingers rubbed small circles against my skin.
“Yeah, Ace?”
“Jake,” he whispered. “After being so deep inside you, I want you to call me Jake. If only for right now.”
I ran my hand through his hair and along his back. He leaned back, propping himself up on one arm and bringing his finger up to trace my bottom lip. “Why did we wait so long, Riley?” His eyes slid closed as he leaned in and kissed me.
The Summer I Fell (The Six Series) Page 6