by D. Breeze
He stopped, with his nose an inch from mine, close enough that I could feel his heated breath on my face.
“I-I didn’t...”
“You didn’t...?” He prompted.
“I...um, what I mean is...” I took a deep breath and whispered, “I’m not going to break, Ruben.”
He edged even closer, his lips whispering a touch on mine. I felt his fingers stroking up my neck, into my hair, then he gripped a fist full hard and pulled my head back. I sucked in a breath through my teeth, not in pain, but anticipation. This was what I had been craving.
He steered me out of the kitchen and across the few steps of the apartment, towards the bed.
“Thank fuck.” He whispered against my neck, then pushed me back so I landed with a bump against the mattress and he slid his hips between my trembling thighs.
Goose bumps broke out across my skin as he licked his way across my throat and his head moved down between my breasts. My eyes rolled back and I moaned when he yanked my bra down and teased my nipple with his tongue. I rolled my hips up, seeking the friction I already needed but he just chuckled and stopped. I snapped my head up and glared at him, but he wasn’t laughing anymore.
I stared into his eyes as he lowered his head once again to my breast, bit down lightly on my nipple, then tugged. My mouth opened and my head flew to the mattress. My back arched in pleasure, my core flooded and my legs clenched around his waist.
“Holy shit...”
I felt his smile against my tender skin as he kissed his way further down my stomach and pushed my legs wider.
He didn’t give me chance to breathe as he ripped my panties down my legs and threw them somewhere over the side of the bed. His mouth latched onto my clit and he sucked deep. Pleasure shot through me, making my toes curl. I bit down on the back of my hand to stop myself from screaming.
“Take your fucking hand away from your mouth. I want to hear you.” Ruben demanded and I obeyed him.
He went back to sucking, I tried to keep my mouth closed but it was too much, too powerful. I was panting and begging, making no sense what-so-ever. He added his fingers and I threw my head back, moaning and pushing closer to his face. I was close, but holding back, I didn’t want him to stop.
“Please, please, please...”
He blew lightly across my sensitive flesh, then pressed his thumb down on my clit and I soared. The warmth spread from my toes, working its way up my body until I was shaking and my moans echoed throughout the tiny room.
Ruben held his hand against my stomach to keep my body still as I rode out the effects of my orgasm.
Still shuddering, I didn’t even notice he’d shed his clothes until he was on me, and in me. He didn’t start slow, he thrust into me, hard. Buried inside me, I could feel every inch of him.
Every. Beautiful. Inch.
He pushed my knees up to my chest and held them there as he ploughed into me. I didn’t think it was possible, but I felt myself building again and I clutched onto his forearms, anchoring him to me.
His fingers dug into the skin on the back of my thighs but I welcomed the hint of pain.
“Ruben...” I panted. “I need...I need...”
“I know what you fucking need.” He growled, slamming himself so deep, I was sure I’d feel him in my throat.
He pulled out and flipped me over, making me let out a squeal that turned into a muffled moan as he thrust back in. My face buried in the mattress, my ass in the air, I’d never felt so vulnerable yet so completely wild. I could feel moisture running down my thighs and I tensed, thinking I should be embarrassed but then his fingers stroked my clit and all rational thoughts fled my brain.
I bit down on the sheet when he grabbed my hips and dug his fingers in but I didn’t tell him to stop. The thought of him marking me made my already trembling legs, vibrate with a whole new level of passion.
“Work with me Lyds, push your ass back.” He demanded on a grunt. I did as he asked and pushed back on my hands meeting his thrusts with my own, savouring the sound and the feel of his body hitting mine.
I felt his hand loosen on my hip and then he brought it down and smacked the cheek of my arse. I sucked in a breath and grunted at the sting.
He’d never done that before, but I liked it.
He did it again on the other side and his name slipped past my lips on an exhaled moan. He stroked my heated flesh, and then lightly scraped his nails across the already-sensitive skin.
My orgasm wasn’t a slow burn, it hit me out of the blue and stars exploded behind my eyes. My legs finally gave out and I collapsed to the bed as he emptied himself inside me.
“Holy...” I panted, not able to get the words out.
“Shit...” He finished.
He pulled me into his arms while I tried to stop my body from trembling. Our skin was slick with sweat and he pulled the quilt over us as I started to shiver.
He kept saying, over and over, that all I had to do was ask and he’d give me whatever I wanted – but I never believed him. I was really starting to believe I should.
“I love you, Lydia.” He whispered into my hair.
I sighed, contented. “I love you too, Ruben.”
Chapter Fifteen
Lydia
“So let me get this straight, you’ve been together for basically two years – and yet, you won’t move in with him because you still need to prove to yourself that you can do everything by yourself.” Jase asked, over coffee.
I nodded, “That’s about the jist of it, yeah.”
He made a growling sound of disgust in his throat. “Sounds to me, like you need to get over yourself.”
My mouth dropped open. That was kind of harsh. He waved his hand in front him, signalling that he wasn’t finished.
“Seriously, you live in a shit-hole, from what you’ve told me. It’s not safe, your building is practically falling down around you and you work sixty-hour weeks at a job you hate...for what? A misplaced sense of pride?”
I was sitting in Nancy’s with Jase on the Thursday of our third week of working together and I’d just talked his ear off about Ruben for the best part of an hour.
Why could no one understand why I had to do this?
“It’s not that! I know he’d work his ass off to give us a good life and a nice place to live, but he shouldn’t have to. That’s the point. I don’t want to be a burden to anyone, especially Ruben, because he already does so much for me and I know that eventually he’ll get bored of me leeching off him and he’ll leave.” I shrugged, I knew I was right.
Jase froze with his cup half-way to his mouth.
“Ruben? That’s an usual name.”
“Um...I guess so. But it’s just him, so I never really thought about it.”
“What’s his surname?” He asked.
“Brent.”
Jase closed his eyes as if he was in pain and I frowned at his reaction.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, nothing, I just...um...burnt my mouth with this coffee.” He held up his cup and laughed nervously.
He didn’t drink from his cup though. He was lying right to my face and I didn’t question him. That was becoming a very nasty habit of mine.
“Anyway, so what do you think I should do, just agree to move in with him?”
“NO! No...just think on it for a while. Maybe go with him to look at some new places first and see if you’ll even agree on a place.”
Seconds before, he’d been telling me I was basically stubborn and stupid for not agreeing, and immediately afterwards he was telling me to wait. It didn’t make any sense.
I shrugged, “There’s no harm in looking I suppose.”
“Exactly.” He nodded.
*~*~*
Ruben
I sat facing the wall of computers in the security room at Blaze and tapped my fingers on the desk. I was bored. Nothing was happening in the bars and the night was too quiet. I started doodling on a notepad to one side, something interesting neede
d to happen.
I heard a knock at the door and Mase walked in, followed by Harper and Jase. My eyebrows drew together.
“You have visitors...” Mase started.
“No shit. What’s up?” I asked all of them.
Jase pointed a finger towards the door, “Mason, always a pleasure, but I’m going to have to ask you to leave. You too, Harp.”
Mase rolled his eyes and Harper stamped her foot, “What the hell? You made me bring you here, I thought I was going to get some gossip.”
“Uh uh,” he shook his head. “Leave.”
Mase bent at the waist and threw Harper over his shoulder. She squealed, clawed at his back and demanded he put her down. I couldn’t help but laugh when he smacked her ass and strolled towards the door.
“Come on, Sunshine. I’ll give you something to gossip about!” He waggled his eyebrows at Jase, who threw him a disgusted look in return. I was still chuckling when the door closed and Jase turned to me.
“So...” I started.
“I’m the new guy who’s been working with your girlfriend for the last three weeks. The girlfriend who you’ve been with for over two years and who has no idea who the fuck you really are. So tell me, Ruben, why the fuck are you hiding her from everyone and when did you turn into such a deceitful bastard?”
I actually felt the blood drain from my face. That was a lot to take in, in a few seconds.
“Um...” Yeah, good start Ruben.
Jase started again, “‘Cause, see here’s what I don’t get. She’s stunningly beautiful, got that whole Italian thing going on. She works hard, she’s proud and cute and she’s one of the most kind-hearted people I’ve ever met - all that, I worked out within a couple of days of knowing her. You’ve had that for two years and what? You don’t want to share? She’s not good enough to meet your family? What is it?”
“Of course she’s fucking good enough to meet them! Don’t say things like that.”
“Then tell me what it is!” He shouted.
“She doesn’t even know they exist!” I screamed. “You don’t know what it was like when I got her back! She hated me because I left, how was I supposed to tell her that I had this amazing life, with brothers who loved me and more money than I knew what do with? When I mentioned that I’d been in care, she finally softened a bit and she just assumed that’s where I stayed until I was old enough to live on my own. I couldn’t tell her the truth, Jase. I couldn’t! Her own brother was, and still is, in prison. So is her Dad, and her Mum is the biggest waste of air I’ve ever met. As far as she’s concerned, the fire that killed my parent, the best thing that ever happened to me, was the worst thing that ever happened to her. She doesn’t know that her Mum and Dad were involved in bad shit long before that. So tell me, Jase, what would you have done?” I didn’t give him chance to answer, it felt too good to let it all out, I wasn’t sure I knew how to stop.
“I did what I had to do to keep her safe. I’m the only thing, the only person, she has now and I’m not going to take that away from her. I love her right down to my soul and I just know that if I just rocked up at her flat tomorrow and said ‘oh, by the way Lyds, I’ve got this whole other group of family and friends that you know nothing about and we actually have a pretty incredible life that I’ve been keeping you away from’ she’ll leave. And she is not safe, not by any stretch of the imagination, but she’d be even less safe if she ran, by herself, because I know she’d eventually go back to her Mum. And I look after her, I keep an eye on her and things just work. If I had to watch out for my entire family - which I would have to do - it would be impossible. I’m just one man, Jase.”
I sucked in a breath. Even I didn’t know just how bad my fears were.
Jase stared at me, then sighed and shook his head.
“Hell of a situation you’ve got yourself into there my friend. But you’re both wrong, and stupid, if you think lying to her is the best thing to do. Just tell her. Get it over with, let her freak out at you and tell her everything you just spewed at me. I’m not saying she’s not going to hit the roof, because she is, but she’ll also get over it eventually. And I’m not going to lie, how could she possibly say no, to being part of us? We’re all family, and it’s a freaking great family. She deserves this, and you know she does. Stop being a coward, man up and tell her the truth. Soon.”
Part of me knew he was right.
The terrified part of me wanted to deny everything he’d said. That part won.
“I can’t...” I moaned.
He scowled at me. “You can and you will. Because, and I’m not joking, Ruben, if you don’t tell her...then I will.”
He flounced out of the room with a flick of his hair and slammed the door behind him.
Shit, fuck and damn.
I was fucked.
*~*~*
Lydia
Something was bothering Ruben.
For the life of me, I just couldn’t figure out what it was. He was the same, but different. With me, he was perfectly fine but when he thought I wasn’t paying attention, he had this look in his eyes like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders.
And I knew he wasn’t sleeping well at night.
So I was on a mission to find out what was going on, without questioning him.
Throwing some of his clothes in the wash, I checked the pockets of his jeans like always, to make sure he hadn’t left anything in there. I rolled my eyes when my hands brushed across something in the back pocket of his favourite jeans; he never did remember to empty them.
I pulled the card out of the pocket and frowned at it.
What would Ruben want with a wedding planner’s card?
I had a sick feeling in my stomach.
The questions in my mind were multiplying daily and I genuinely felt like my brain was going to explode. The problem was, it had gone on for too long. Most people wouldn’t, couldn’t understand it. My fear of the unknown had only grown over the years.
I knew that I didn’t have all of Ruben. But at the same time, he took everything I had emotionally and gave me everything he could. Which to me, had been enough...but it wouldn’t be enough forever.
So for once, just because the compulsion was too much and I knew for my own sanity that I had to...I called Ruben into the kitchen.
“Why do you have a wedding planner’s card in your jeans?”
His face, no matter how much he tried to conceal it, drained of colour and he gulped.
Not a good sign.
Then, like he’d just had a ‘Eureka!’ moment, he rolled his eyes and spoke.
“Damn it! I knew I could never keep a secret from you for long,” he joked, unconvincingly. Then he took a deep breath and lowered to one knee in front of me. “Lydia, I had all these plans to make this the perfect for you but it makes sense that this is how I’d do it. Some of my favourite moments with you started right here in this kitchen,” he winked and I blushed. “Anyway, I decided a long time ago that you were, are, the woman for me. I was just waiting for the right moment to ask you. Will you marry me?”
He held out a small, silver ring in his fingertips and I just stared.
At him.
At the ring.
Then I nodded my head slowly, but didn’t say a word.
“Is that a yes?” He asked with a grin.
“Yes!” I screeched, then threw myself at him on the floor. We ended up sprawled side by side as I rained kisses all over his face. He cupped my face in one hand and swept my cheek with his thumb.
“I love you, Lydia Romero. I can’t wait to make you my wife.”
“I love you too, Ruben Brent. I can wait to be the Mrs to your Mr,” I shook my head, still not sure what had happened in the last five minutes. “I can’t believe I’m going to be Mrs Brent.”
A cocky smile spread across his face, “Believe it, baby.”
Chapter Sixteen
Ruben
I officially, no doubt about it, asked my woman to marry me...to keep my secret.
I’m a dick.
I don’t deny that.
But it’s a fact.
I planned to ask her. I hadn’t lied about that bit. I wanted a wife, a family, and I couldn’t imagine having that with anyone else other than Lydia. Ever.
But the wedding planner card belonged to Mase, who’d got it from the crazy lady who planned Jackson and Taylor’s wedding.
So maybe the way it was done was wrong, but I was still over the moon that Lydia had agreed to marry me. I’d been carrying the little ring in my wallet for weeks, just waiting for the right moment.
It wasn’t the right moment.
But I meant what I said to her, it just made sense that we’d end up taking the next step in our relationship, right in the middle of the kitchen floor.
Hour later, I held her close to my side in her bed after I’d had her crying my name again and again. Sated, we relaxed back and I tangled her leg with mine.
I liked to sleep with her close.
She was idly running her fingers up and down my arm and I thought she was drifting off to sleep but she must have just been thinking.
“I think you should find your brother.” She said, making my heart jump into my throat.
“W-what? Why?”
“Well, I want to get married and I don’t care about a big day or anything. WE certainly don’t need a wedding planner. But no girl wants to get married with no one there. Who am I going to invite, Ruben? There’s an off chance that Lucas could get a day release pass now that he’s in an open prison. I can’t invite my mum or my dad. I don’t have any friends from the estate that I can invite. Maybe Jase from work? That’s it!”
I hadn’t even thought that far ahead.
I omitted. I twisted the truth and I bent it to fit what I needed but I never outright lied.
If she’d have looked me in the face and asked me if I ever saw my brothers or how much money I had, even what my actual job-role at the club was - I’d have told her. I would have had to tell her.
But she never did.