by Abby Blake
“Baby girl,” Brock said as he ran a soothing hand up and down her spine. “John is going to stay with you while we sort out this latest batch of raiders. And then we’re going to talk about what’s going on in your head.” She nodded and tried a sad smile, but it was obvious that whatever she’d been thinking before he came in was not good.
A knot formed in his stomach. Something told him things were changing. Somehow the idyllic life he thought they had together wasn’t quite as solid as he’d once believed.
He helped her from the bath, dried her off, and sat her on the bed. “Stay,” he said when it looked like she might follow him. John helped her get dressed and then lay down beside her and pulled her into his arms.
“I’ll tell the others you two want some alone time, but I can’t promise to keep Lachlan away. He’ll know something’s up the moment he sees me.” She nodded again, not even trying to reassure him that everything was all right. Brock made eye contact with John, and then left the room quietly.
In the hallway, he took a deep breath, preparing himself to lie to his brothers and pretend that everything was fine.
Chapter Three
“Seriously?” Ryan asked and then laughed harder.
Lachlan was still trying to not imagine how many splinters humping a tree would cause when Brock came into the room. The man smiled and laughed with the rest of them as Bryce gave them all a very comical description of the three raiders they’d just sent home, but Lachlan could sense something wasn’t quite right. He also realized that Brock wasn’t in the mood to talk about it.
“I’m just glad it was a tree. I swear we’re liable to find them humping each other one of these days. What part of ‘quarantine’ don’t these dickheads understand?”
“Is the vitamin supplement still suppressing the pheromones’ effects?” Brock asked, sounding very serious.
Lachlan glanced around the rest of his brothers. None of the others seemed to have noticed Brock’s strange mood, so Lachlan answered the question quickly and resolved to get answers to his own questions later.
“It’s still effective, but maybe not as effective as it once was. Either that, or the mouse tears are getting more potent. I would suggest that we consider not taking the supplement unless we’re planning to leave the building. I don’t want the only thing that inhibits the effects of the mating musk losing its potency.”
“True,” Ty said, still laughing. “Hell, we could all end up humping trees.” He acted out a rather crude version of what could happen, and the rest of his brothers laughed with him.
“I suppose it makes sense,” Ryan said, looking thoughtful. “I’ll let Misha know.”
“No, I’d rather the medical consortium didn’t know. We’ll continue to accept the weekly allocations, but we’ll just store the excess. The way they have been acting lately, I wouldn’t put it past them to cut off our supply if they felt it were in their company’s best interest.”
“We probably need to hire more security ourselves,” Bryce said, concern creasing his face. “So far these raiders have come in small numbers. If we get a larger raiding party, we could be in trouble.”
“Or the trees could,” Ty added, still laughing.
“Oh, shit, what if there were enough of them to make a daisy chain?” Ryan added.
Lachlan shook his head in an effort to dislodge that image. He hoped like hell he’d never have to try and break up a group of mating musk affected men humping in a circle. Today’s experience had been unpleasant enough.
“Where’s Mikayla?” Bryce asked curiously as he finally stopped laughing.
“Spending some quiet time with John,” Brock said, projecting a calm Lachlan was certain the man wasn’t feeling. He watched as his brother tried to force a relaxed smile onto his face. “I volunteered to cook dinner.”
They all groaned as Brock knew his brothers would and Lachlan watched curiously as Brock headed into the kitchen, thereby forestalling any more questions about their wife. Obviously something was amiss, but even more concerning was Brock’s unwillingness to share.
He followed Brock into the kitchen and caught his brother’s disappointed sigh.
“I think we should renegotiate our contract,” Brock said as if to override any questions from Lachlan. Lachlan noticed the tension in Brock’s shoulders and really wanted to demand answers. But Brock was a far better Dom than Lachlan, and if Lachlan pushed too hard, Brock would simply shut down and keep his secret forever.
“Sure,” Lachlan answered carefully. “It’s probably a good idea. We are spending more time on security than surveys and research.”
“True,” Brock said as if he hadn’t actually considered that angle.
“Okay, I’ll contact our lawyer,” Lachlan said, watching his brother closely. Brock looked over at him but waited for Lachlan to elaborate. “If nothing else, it might at least alert the mining company to the medical consortium’s attitude toward protecting its staff.”
Brock nodded, and Lachlan could practically see his brother looking at the suggestion from all angles.
“Okay,” he finally agreed. “In fact, it might be a good idea for John to head back to earth for a while. Maybe he could take Mikayla along.”
“Only if you go with them,” Lachlan said. He sure as hell didn’t miss the relief in his brother’s expression. Whatever was going on, Brock and John seemed inclined to keep it from the rest of them.
“Okay,” Brock said again. “I think that would be a good idea. John and Mikayla and I will head back to Earth for a few weeks, renegotiate the contracts, and hopefully get us extra help with security.”
Lachlan nodded, watched his brother’s body language closely for a while, and then turned to leave the room.
“They’re in my bed,” Brock said quietly. Lachlan raised an eyebrow. It wasn’t uncommon for the brothers to do a certain amount of bed-hopping to be with their wife, but usually, intimate alone time with Mikayla was done is their own beds, not someone else’s. He waited for Brock to elaborate, but it seemed that he’d said all he was going to say. Lachlan nodded his thanks for what he expected was a cryptic clue and headed to his and Brock’s living quarters.
* * * *
John lay on the bed, his arms wrapped around Mikayla. He’d held her for less than a minute before he realized she was trying hard not to cry.
“I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just can’t seem to fight it. I’m not even sure why I feel so sad.”
Remorse cut through him, and he pulled her closer. He hadn’t even noticed how much she’d withdrawn from them until today. With all the chaos of the mouse tears, the female scientists, and the constant arrival of raiders, he hadn’t given any thought to how his wife might feel in the center of it all.
He was still trying to figure out what to do when the door opened quietly. John wasn’t even surprised to see Lachlan. If any of his brothers had picked up on Mikayla’s unusual behavior, it would be Lachlan. Irrational anger tromped through John’s mind, unfairly blaming his brother for not alerting him to concerns he himself hadn’t seen.
“Little one,” Lachlan said, managing to sound both sad and annoyed at the same time. He leaned over and smoothed the hair away from Mikayla’s eyes. “John and Brock are going to take you to Earth. We want you to see a doctor first and then spend some time relaxing.”
She nodded tiredly, her eyes still closed. John couldn’t help but wonder if Lachlan had noticed her gradual withdrawal why he hadn’t done anything until now. His ability to read body language was sometimes a little freaky. But then again, the change had been so gradual maybe even Lachlan hadn’t realized just how far she’d moved away from the vibrant, sassy woman they’d all fallen in love with.
Then the part about taking her to Earth sank in.
“Brock and I think it would be a good idea to renegotiate our contract,” Lachlan said to him. John nodded. He’d been thinking the same thing ever since the raids had started. This was no
t the situation they’d signed up for, and it would be a plausible excuse for getting Mikayla off the planet without upsetting the others. Although, he suspected that, like him, his brothers would be happier to have her somewhere safer until they could sort out the security issues.
“I’ll go run a systems check on the cruiser. Brock’s driving,” Lachlan said as he headed out the door. John nodded again and then pulled Mikayla closer.
“Hear that, princess? Big brother still won’t let me fly the family spaceship.” She smiled slightly, and he felt reassured by the fact that she hadn’t withdrawn completely. She was hurting and very tired, but at least she was still acknowledging his presence. “It’s not like I crashed it on purpose,” he said on a pretend grumble, trying to inject a hint of “normal” into their conversation. She nodded slowly and then wriggled closer.
When he and his brothers had discussed buying their own intergalactic transport, John had nearly gagged at the exorbitant expense, but with the current situation, he was very glad his brothers had insisted. The trip back to Earth would take just over thirteen hours. If they had to wait for commercial shipping lines, it could’ve taken weeks to get Mikayla back to Earth.
“I’ve packed some things for Mikayla,” Brock said as he came in the door. “Give me a minute to pack some stuff, and I’ll get Mikayla to the cruiser while you grab some clothes.”
John nodded and then leaned forward to press a kiss to his wife’s cheek. “I love you,” he whispered, unable to think of any way to reassure her more than he already had. Reluctantly, he rolled off the bed and let Brock lift Mikayla to her feet. John nodded once and then headed for the door.
* * * *
Lachlan watched his normally controlled brother practically twitch with agitation as he filled him in on the last twenty-four hours since they’d left the jungle planet.
“She’s okay,” Brock said through the intergalactic connection. “The doctor said everything is fine. Mikayla’s tired and rundown and low on vitamin D.”
“That makes sense,” Lachlan said, turning the information over in his mind. “Vitamin D deficiency can trigger depression in space travelers. I’ll check the UV lights on the station are working correctly.” Brock nodded his agreement. Either the lights they used as an equivalent for the Earth’s sunshine weren’t working the way they were supposed to, or there was something on the planet draining vitamin D from their bodies. Either way, Lachlan and his brothers probably hadn’t been affected because of the vitamin supplement they were taking to counteract the mouse tears’ effects.
“Anyway, the doctor has suggested she take vitamin supplements while she’s off planet, but the good news is that she should be fine in a few days.” He ran a hand through his hair and huffed out a tired breath. “But emotionally, she’s still pulling away. I can feel it, Lachlan, and I don’t know how to stop it. I wish you or Bryce were here. Maybe you could tell me what we’re doing wrong. I feel like we’re losing her.”
“I doubt you’re doing anything wrong,” Lachlan said sympathetically. It wasn’t often that Brock was unsure of himself. “Just keep her close.”
Lachlan didn’t voice his theory out loud for fear that it was very close to the truth. He suspected that their beautiful wife was considering leaving them partly because the female scientists seemed to undermine her confidence and partly because she was frightened to fall pregnant again. He and Mikayla had very briefly discussed trying again when they got back to Earth, but the closer that time came, the more she seemed to withdraw into herself. Of course a vitamin D deficiency would probably exacerbate those emotions.
Brock ran his hands down his face and made an obvious effort to try to pull himself together. “We’re booked on the next sky-pod to California. Hopefully spending time with Tracey will help.”
Lachlan nodded and went to say something when the proximity alarm started howling again. “Damn, the raiders are getting bolder and far more stupid. This is the third group today. We’ve started wearing protective gear just so we don’t end up splattered in something unpleasant.” He gave that last word a whole lot more meaning just by the way he said it.
Brock nodded, seeming in control once more and closed the connection. Lachlan had barely a moment to consider his brother’s uncharacteristic behavior as he headed to the communications room to gather his equipment and find out where the raiders had landed.
* * * *
It was probably really silly considering that Mikayla had eight husbands, but arriving at Tracey’s home made her feel like she finally had someone she could lean on for a little while. Her men were very supportive, but it felt awful to lean on them when it was her own fears causing the problem. It would seem, however, that the doctor’s theory was proving correct because the more time she spent in the sunshine the more she felt like herself.
Tracey took one look at her and pulled Mikayla in for a hug. How she managed to get John and Brock to leave the room was a mystery, but leave they did. They hadn’t left Mikayla alone for a single moment since they’d boarded the cruiser back on the jungle planet. She understood what they were doing, and she was somewhat annoyed by it, but she wouldn’t give them grief for trying to help her.
“What’s going on?” Tracey asked immediately.
Mikayla tried to smile reassuringly, but when Tracey gave her a knowing look, she said, “Just working through some stuff in my head.”
“Stuff?” Tracey asked. “What sort of stuff?”
“I’m just being silly. Everything’s okay. I’m fine really.”
“I know you,” Tracey said with a wag of her finger, “you’re not fine, and the last thing you would’ve done is lean on those husbands of yours, so explain to me what this stuff is about and we can work through it together.” Mikayla smiled slightly. Yes, Tracey did know her. She knew how Mikayla sometimes struggled to retain her sense of self when faced with eight very large men with personalities to match. She loved them dearly, desperately even, but it would be very easy to stop being herself and become the helpless, pathetic female she’d always despised. As much as she enjoyed their coddling, there had to be a limit.
“So talk to me, Mikayla?” Tracey asked slowly as if she was measuring every word. “Is this about getting pregnant again?”
Mikayla shrugged, trying to hide just how scared she felt. When she’d learned she was pregnant, she’d been so excited, but that high had dived to a new terrifying low when she’d miscarried. Time hadn’t made things less painful. In fact, the passage of time had just made the memories more powerful. She closed her eyes as if by admitting the truth without seeing anything it would somehow make it less damning.
“I don’t think I can go through it again,” she said, nearly whispering. The tears leaked out of her closed eyes and Tracey made a sympathetic noise.
“Do your husbands know how you feel?”
Mikayla shook her head but added, “I think they suspect it, though.”
“Good,” Tracey said, sounding for all the world like an avenging angel. “It’ll save me time if I don’t have to kick their asses. You need time to heal—emotionally as well as physically. Take a year or two off from planning a family. Just enjoy being married and forget about babies for a while.”
Mikayla nodded, feeling a guilty relief that someone else shared her opinion. She kept telling herself it was silly to be reacting the way she was, but she just couldn’t shake the fear. And of course that niggling doubt of her own worth as a woman reared its ugly head, and she once again found herself wondering if her husbands would be better off without her as their wife. What if it happened again? What if she was never able to give them children? Maybe if she got out of the way, they could find several wives between them and have a whole houseful of kids within a couple years.
“I should let them go,” she said, shaking her head sadly, “but I’m such a coward. I don’t want to live without them.” She whispered the words even as she meant to hide the thoughts.
“No,” Tracey said, sounding
horrified. “You love those men, and they love you.” Tracey glanced at the closed door, and Mikayla found herself kind of hoping that her men were listening. Maybe if they knew she was willing to step aside, they’d take the hard steps for her.
“You listen to me Mikayla Davidson,” Tracey said angrily. “Not one of those men will ever look to replace you. They love you with everything in them. I may not have met Bryce face-to-face, but if he’s as much like Matt as you’ve told me, he’ll never let you go either. You’re it. You’re the one for all of them.” She took a deep breath, grabbed both of Mikayla’s hands, and squeezed reassuringly. “They will love you until the end of time whether you stay with them or not. Don’t you dare go doing something stupid out of misdirected loyalty. All you will do is make yourself and eight wonderful men miserable.”
Mikayla nodded. Her heart squeezed at the thought of hurting her guys, but she worried that she’d never find the courage to try to become pregnant again. She feared that years into the future, when they were old and gray and there weren’t any Davidson children to carry on the family name, her husbands would grow to resent her.
“John is renegotiating the mining survey contract, so we’ll see what happens before I make any firm decisions.”
Tracey still looked worried, but she nodded once as if she sensed Mikayla couldn’t take much more and then changed the subject.
They spent some time talking about day to day stuff, catching up on each other’s lives. By the time Mikayla finished telling Tracey about the mating musk of the mouse tears and the interesting effects it had on the human male population, they were practically giggling like a couple of schoolgirls.
“Thank God we landed on the planet at the beginning of mating season. The stuff seems far more potent now.”