by Gigi Moore
When he opened his eyes, seconds, minutes, hours later, it was to see Ethan staring at him as if the stripling had experienced an epiphany.
Ki felt he had experienced one himself, but still couldn’t bring himself to say the words to Ethan and Lucy out loud, not while he was wide awake. Instead, he leaned over Lucy’s shoulder, placing his lips on Ethan’s. He drew Ethan’s tongue into his mouth to taste Lucy’s sweet, tart flavor from his lover’s tongue, then shared his enjoyment with his wife when he kissed Lucy.
Ki wrapped his arms around Lucy and Ethan, drawing them close and hoping that his body expressed the feelings he could not say. For now, it had to be enough.
* * * *
Ki’s mother had been acting strange during breakfast and after, since Ethan and Lucy had left the house for errands and for work. She was on edge, which consequently put him more on edge since hearing about the incident at Winchester’s involving Cody Paxton.
With his mother behaving so out of character—staying in the house, pretending to read the newspaper among other things she didn’t normally do—it didn’t surprised Ki when she finally approached him in the parlor during his practice fencing session and said, “Hezekiah, there’s something of import that I must discuss with you.”
Ki instantly went cold and thought that his complexion might be at least a shade paler than normal with most of the blood draining from his face.
He wasn’t surprised that his mother had come to him, but he was alarmed by her tone, one he hadn’t heard since his freshman year of college when he’d expressed his wish to major in art and not law.
Look how that had turned out.
“Certainly, Mother.” Ki replaced his foil to its storage space before wiping his face with a towel and returning it to the mantle. “Would in here be all right?”
“In here is fine.” His mother sat on the chaise lounge across the room and Ki joined her, feeling a little self-conscious perspiring in his fencing attire.
He watched as his mother worried a hanky between her hands and felt his stomach tie itself into knots. “Mother.” Ki put his hand on both of hers and squeezed. “Whatever it is you need to say to me, it can’t be that bad.”
“You see, that’s just it. I believe it is ‘that bad.’”
“When have you ever been disinclined to giving me a piece of your mind?”
“Oh, but this is so much more…personal. So different than anything I’ve ever had to broach with you.”
Now Ki really was worried. He’d thought for sure she was going to confront him about his decision regarding the practice back in New York and whether or not he was moving back to the city. He hadn’t even addressed the issue of leaving Elk Creek with Lucy or Ethan. He wasn’t even sure yet if that’s what he wanted to do. He rather liked it out here in the Wild West.
“Mother?”
“I saw Ethan coming out of your and Lucy’s bedroom a few mornings ago.”
For a moment, Ki’s heart stopped. He had expected this, or something like it, so he didn’t know why he was so shocked, but he was.
He appreciated that his mother had waited for him to be alone before bringing up this subject, but then his mother was nothing if not discreet. He did not want to have to address this issue with Lucy and Ethan present. This, he thought, was between him and his mother, his cross to bear and no one else’s.
“Well, aren’t you going to say anything?”
“Honestly, Mother, I don’t know what you want me to say.” Now he knew how Ethan and Lucy must have felt when he’d confronted them about Prentice’s past.
“I want you to tell me what’s going on between the three of you.”
“Going on?”
“Do not play coy with me, Hezekiah Jacobi Benjamin. It doesn’t suit you.”
“Very well, Mother.”
“Are you…” His mother grimaced and closed her eyes as if she was in pain. When she opened her eyes a moment later to stare at him, she looked as if she had aged ten years in that short span of time. “Are you having sexual relations with them both…together?”
Ki had had nightmares most of his life about this very moment, and in them he had always known the right thing to say to his mother to put her mind at ease about what he was doing with his life. Strangely, in his waking hour, he could come up with nothing comforting.
“Yes,” he rasped and peered at his mother across the small space between them.
His mother released the breath she had been holding. “Dear God, Ki…”
“It’s not a tragedy, Mother. You don’t have to act as if you’ve just heard that someone you love has died.”
“Speaking of which…if my lowlife, sick bastard of a brother wasn’t dead, I’d surely kill him myself and with my bare hands.”
“Mother!” He had never heard her use language like that before.
“I mean it. He didn’t deserve to be around decent people. He didn’t deserve to be around my sweet innocent little boy.”
For the second time in the last few days, he found himself jumping to his uncle’s defense. “It wasn’t Uncle Rance.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. Of course it was your uncle Rance.”
“Mother—”
“It’s my fault. I should have never trusted him with you. But it was after your father had died. I was so lost without him and you…well, you needed a solid good male in your life. He was my brother. And you loved him so much. How could I know? How could I…”
Ki reached out to grasp her shoulders and gently shook her. “Mother, stop this right now. It wasn’t your fault. You couldn’t have known. No one could. Uncle Rance was the way he was. Just as I am the way I am.”
“No.” She shook her head. “I refuse to accept that.”
“You really don’t have a choice. I’m attracted to females and males. I always have been.”
“How can you say that? You were just a boy. How could you know anything at that age?”
“I don’t know, Mother. I just know how I feel. I’ve always been this way. It wasn’t anything Uncle Rance did to me. Nor is my being the way I am your fault. It just is.”
His mother looked at him, tears brimming in her eyes and all Ki wanted to do was take away her pain. He wished he knew how. He hadn’t seen her this distraught since his father had died. Like Lucy, his mother was a strong woman, good at hiding her emotions behind a wall of proper social etiquette. She wasn’t hiding them now, however.
“My baby boy.” Despite her pain, her nurturing instinct did not cease and she put a hand on his cheek as if to console him.
Ki put his hand over hers and returned her unwavering look.
“You…love Lucy and Ethan?”
“I do, yes.”
“You’re happy? Really?”
“I am.”
“I guess that’s all a mother can ask for. It’s just…it can’t be an easy life.”
Ki didn’t know whether his mother was referring to the ménage à trois or his bisexuality, but either way, he nodded, because she was right. It wasn’t going to be an easy life for any of them being together.
“Is this why you were trying to get rid of me so soon before?” his mother asked.
She didn’t seem insulted just curious and maybe slightly amused.
Ki smiled to soften the blow. “I have to admit, it would have been easier if I could have spared you this heartache. But you would have had to know eventually and it’s better that you found out this way rather than from someone else outside our intimate circle later on.”
“So you really are serious about being with both of them?”
“I couldn’t be more serious about seeing this relationship through, Mother. I really do love them and I want to spend the rest of my life with both of them.”
His mother nodded. “I’ve never heard you sound so sure of yourself before. Not even when you said you wanted to major in art.”
“I guess I’ve finally found my real passion.”
“Does that mean you won
’t be going on any more of those crazy little jaunts of yours?”
“I wouldn’t go that far, but I think I am ready to settle down at least a bit.” Those “crazy little jaunts” were a part of who he was, a part of his life. He hoped to add Lucy and Ethan to that aspect of his life, not remove that aspect to accommodate his wife and lover. He hoped he wouldn’t have to make that choice. Knowing Lucy and Ethan the way he did, he didn’t think he would have to.
“Well, good for you.” His mother threw her arms around him and hugged tight.
Ki returned her embrace, swallowing hard against the lump in his throat.
All these years he had lived with this facet of his life, his sexuality locked away in the dark, away from “decent” people. All these years he had dreaded the day when his loved ones, the most important people in the world to him, discovered what he was, discovered what his passion was. Now it was out and the most important people in the world to him were the people enjoying this facet of his life with him, people he hoped loved him as much as he loved them.
Finally, Ki’s mother pulled away, and wiped her eyes with her hanky, sniffling a little before smiling through her tears. He should have expected her next question, but only laughed and shook his head when she asked, “So, when are you all going to make me a grandmother?”
Chapter 24
Healing Magick was packed with people bearing festively wrapped gifts and good will.
The main floor had been transformed into a happy haven of pink, blue, green, and yellow decorations strewn throughout the space and complementary colorful banners and balloons strung from the ceiling.
The town’s people had really come through and outdone themselves with the trimmings and food for Lily’s baby shower, but then of course, Sabrina and Maia weren’t above browbeating a body if they had to.
Lucy had been in on the plans as well and almost from the beginning, but she was still impressed with the results of so many weeks of preparation and planning. She could just imagine the looks on Lily’s, Wyatt’s, and Dakota’s faces when they finally arrived.
Lucy was thinking that should be any moment now since Maia had ridden out to the house to retrieve them all a little more than two hours ago.
In the meantime, the guests congregated in their little circles, chatting and munching on appetizers until the guests of honor arrived.
Lucy found herself drifting from group to group inadvertently listening to the latest gossip and wondering what these same people would be saying about her, Ethan, and Ki if they knew what the three of them did together behind closed doors.
Would they be as unkind as they were about Lily, Wyatt, and Dakota’s relationship?
Someone bumped her hip and Lucy turned to see that Sabrina had sidled up beside her with one of her famous grins. “Don’t let these small-minded people get to you.”
Was dismay written all over her face? “They’re basically good people,” Lucy said, dutifully defending the community she had grown up in.
“Oh, I didn’t say they weren’t good. They aren’t any better or worse than any other small town citizens I’ve come across. They just have their faults like everyone else and being small-minded where certain things are concerned is one of them. If they weren’t good people, though, I wouldn’t have hung around here as long as I have.”
Lucy peered at Sabrina, not for the first time wondering what her story was. Sabrina had to know that the rumors ran rampant about her situation with Luke and Joshua, not to mention her origins and personal history. Probably the only reason none of the gathered groups were nattering about Lucy and Sabrina was because they were actually present to defend themselves.
“Enough about these folks,” Sabrina said, dismissively waving her hand in the general direction of the crowd. “How are things going with you and Ki? You seem to be getting along a mite better than you were at the beginning.”
“We are,” Lucy said.
“Oh, come on now. You can tell me. Spill it.”
“There’s nothing to tell. We’re husband and wife and that’s the way things are.”
“But for how much longer?”
Lucy wasn’t surprised by the question or that Sabrina had had the gumption to ask it. She was sure everyone in town knew the circumstances of her marriage and was just too tactful to say anything, at least to her face. Sabrina was her friend and probably felt she had the right. Not to mention she spent half her life looking out for Lucy as if she was her mother or an older sister responsible for her well-being.
“To tell you the truth, Ki and I haven’t discussed…things.”
“He’s probably changed his mind and wants to make a go of the marriage.”
Lucy’s heart leapt at the possibility. True, she had been spending every waking moment with Ki and Ethan when she wasn’t at Healing Magick, either making love as Ethan put it, or making plans to make love. She knew that Ki was enjoying himself and that he even harbored some affection for her in his heart. Was it all enough, however, to make him want to stay with her and Ethan in Elk Creek?
For that matter, what were Ethan’s thoughts about their little threesome? Was he just going along for the ride, for now, to see where things took him, or was he planning to plant stakes and stay with her and Ki? Lucy reminded herself that the Ethan who had grown up in Elk Creek with her wasn’t the same Ethan she was dealing with now and Prentice didn’t strike her as the laying-down-stakes type any more than Ki did.
Six months ago Lucy’s biggest concern had been acquiring ownership of Peyton’s free and clear so that she could be the independent woman she had always wanted to be. Now she wanted nothing more than to belong to two men, and happily, shamelessly live with them as their wife and lover. She never thought she would see the day when she would want nothing better than to be tied down to any man, much less two, but there it was. Her new goal and wants, however, didn’t mean that Ki and Ethan had changed theirs and were on board with being tied down and domesticated. Lucy didn’t think she could be so lucky. She hadn’t been so far.
“Don’t look so worried, Lucy. I’ve seen the way that man looks at you. He’s not going anywhere any time soon. I guarantee it,” Sabrina said as if to console her.
“I’m going to take that to the bank.”
Sabrina laughed. “You do that.”
“What about you and your permanent boarders?” Lucy asked, eager to get the subject off of her and onto someone or something else besides her unrealized dreams.
“Joshua and Luke? Oh please! Those two are just passing through.”
“I might believe that if they haven’t been in Elk Creek going on more than a year now. Something must be keeping them here. Or someone,” Lucy teased.
“Now don’t you go spreading no unfounded rumors, missy.”
“Ain’t me spreading rumors.”
“You can’t be serious!” Sabrina gasped then glanced around the room before she moved in closer to Lucy and whispered, “Is that what people are saying about us?”
“You really don’t know?” Lucy was flabbergasted.
Was Sabrina that oblivious about what was being said in relation to her and Joshua and Luke? More than likely she was so busy living her life she didn’t have time to pay attention to gossip, which was a good thing. Lucy needed to be more like her.
Maybe Sabrina didn’t recognize her boarders’ hankerings because she was too close to the situation, same as Lucy was too close to Ki to recognize the looks he was giving her as anything more than mild affection.
There had been one moment, though, that first time when all three of them had been together and Lucy had been drifting off to sleep when she’d thought she’d heard the words “I love you.” She had been so comfortable and all-in she hadn’t been sure of what she’d heard or even who had said the words. It could have been either or both men. She’d like to think it was both and that they had said the almighty words.
Suddenly, a commotion rose up at the front door and Thayne told everybody to quiet down a
s he and Cade dimmed the kerosene sconces along the wall.
The brothers quickly took their places in the center of the crowd.
Lucy felt excitement rippling through the room as Maia put her key in the lock, turned it, and opened the door at the same instant everyone on the main floor yelled, “Surprise!”
“What in tarnation!” Wyatt pushed Lily behind him and cocked a fist as Lily gasped and grabbed her chest.
“Mommy!” Little Wyatt clung to Lily’s hips, hiding his face behind his mother’s skirts.
Dakota was the only one who maintained a modicum of composure at the town’s boisterous welcome, but even he had taken up ranks in front of Lily before the crowd broke out into gales of laughter.
Cade turned the kerosene sconces back up so that the guests of honor could get a better look at what was going on. Then Thayne came forward and slapped Wyatt on the back. “Welcome to Lily’s surprise baby shower.”
“I almost had the little one right here, right now,” Lily joked.
“I don’t think I’ve ever been to such a shindig.” Wyatt smiled.
“The people of Elk Creek obviously care for our Lily greatly,” Dakota said.
“Darn tootin’, we do.” Sabrina raised her arms and led the guests in a rousing rendition of “For She’s a Jolly Good Fellow.”
Little Wyatt, seeing that the coast was clear and his mother, father, and uncle were not in any danger, came from behind Lily to clap and dance to the song, much to the delight of all the adults present.
Little Wyatt was soon joined by some of the town’s other children and in no time they were off and running, playing childhood games as their parents got down to the business of properly welcoming Lily to her baby shower.
Lucy stood on the periphery of the crowd milling around the proud parents-to-be, waiting for her chance to congratulate Lily and Wyatt and express her well-wishes, when Margaret stopped at her side and smiled.
“You ladies did a wonderful job putting this soiree together.”
“You helped quite a lot, Margaret.”