She wasn’t ready for this; she couldn’t handle it, not right now. He had every right to hate her, but she couldn’t bear to hear him say it.
Tom’s eyes scoured her face, and she knew exactly what he was doing.
“Please,” she whispered, “stay out of my mind. I—”
He shook his head, his eyes soft and beseeching. “Honey, why are you panicking?”
Anna’s chest rose and fell too quickly, and beads of sweat sprang to life on her forehead and the back of her neck. “Tom,” she said hoarsely. “Please…I can’t breathe.”
“I’m not going to hurt you, Anna.” Another step. “I just—”
She slapped her hands on the countertop, making her palms sting. “But you are hurting me,” she wailed. Anna was shaking uncontrollably, her whole body coated in a clammy sheen of sweat. “Just being in the same room with you hurts me!”
Tom froze, still several steps away, his face stricken.
Needing to move, Anna turned away from him and stalked around the island to the other side, where she began to pace. “I know what you must think of me—how you must feel about me. And I don’t blame you. I get it, I really do. After everything I’ve done…after everything with Gregory.” She ran both of her hands through her hair, tugging when she reached the ends. “But still, every time you’re near me, all I can think about is how much you must despise me, and it’s like I’m being gutted.” She turned away from him, covering her face with her hands as she tried to calm herself, to breathe.
“But I don’t despise you,” Tom said so quietly that Anna was certain she’d misheard him.
“What—” She peered at him over her shoulder. “What did you just say?”
Tom returned her stare, so earnest, so sturdy, so sure. He stole her breath when he looked at her like that. “I don’t despise you, Anna.”
All she could do was continue to stare at him, owllike with all of her stunned blinking and standing still.
Slowly, like a cautious birder stalking his quarry, Tom made his way around the island. “I’ve hated the circumstances that made you leave, and I’ve hated the situation you were forced into, but never, not once in all the years since you left, have I ever thought badly of you.” He stopped within arm’s reach of her, his lips curving into a quiet, gentle smile. “I loved the woman I married thirty years ago, and I’m sure that if you give me the chance to get to know the woman standing right here in front of me, I’ll love her just as much.”
Anna’s chest no longer felt constricted, but rather too full. She no longer felt the need to flee, but worried she might float away. She’d loved Tom since the day she first met him, had hated the day she’d first left him, thought she’d die of a broken heart when she saw him again years later, and now he was standing in front of her, in this place where they might actually have a chance to be together, and she thought her heart might burst with joy. Silent tears turned to quiet sobs.
Tom moved closer and cupped the side of her face. She didn’t flinch from fear his touch would turn painful, didn’t have to pretend she enjoyed it. She choked a small laugh and shut her eyes, allowing the feeling of his hand against her cheek to sear into her memory. “So,” Tom said timidly, “what do you say?”
“I—I don’t—”
“C’mon, Doc,” Tom said, resurrecting his nickname for her from long ago. He winked at her, shedding decades of physical and emotional wear and tear in a millisecond. “Let me buy you dinner?”
Anna laughed, wiping the tears from her cheeks with shaking hands. She felt so giddy, the noise simply burst out of her. “I think it’s free.”
Tom grinned, wide and proud. “A few months working the farm’ll convince you otherwise.”
Which meant he wanted her to stay. Anna couldn’t help but smile up at him. Because now, more than anything, she wanted to stay, too.
~~~~~
“So, that’s pretty much it,” Anna said. “Children born of parents with Abilities usually have some combination of their parents’ Abilities, though the rule’s not universal.” She sent a fond glance to Peter, sitting beside her at the large kitchen table everyone had gathered around for her second dinner on the farm. “And Abilities can start to show up in odd ways throughout the pregnancy, almost making it seem as though the mother has additional Abilities for a while, but it doesn’t always happen in noticeable ways.” She shrugged, meeting Dani’s attentive eyes on the far side of the table. “Again, there’s no universal rule, and it’s not like there have been that many cases to study. Just myself and a few others…”
She took one final bite of stew, then set her spoon down in her bowl and sat back with a contented sigh, feeling overwhelmingly satisfied. She’d had a second helping of the delicious venison stew, and she never had seconds. But there was just something about fresh food—freshly caught, freshly gathered, freshly grown—that made it taste better than anything she’d eaten inside the Colony.
“Is everyone finished?” Becca asked from her spot opposite Anna, squished between Mase and Camille. Anna could hardly believe they could all fit, regardless of how large of a farm table it was. But somehow, they managed.
Murmurs of assent filled the room, accompanied by nods and a few grunts.
“Well, then,” Becca said, the dusk light streaming in through the windows adding golden highlights to her brunette hair. “There’s something I need to share with you all.”
Silence descended, sucking the comfort and good spirits out of the room.
Becca looked around the table, scanning the faces of her companions. Finally, she cleared her throat. “My visions are complicated.” A small frown line appeared between her eyebrows. “And they’re not always certain or clear.” She sat up straighter, commanding the room. “But there is one I have known for some time now. One I have been waiting for, and…dreading.” She nodded, as though assuring herself that this was the right time, the right place, the right way to share her vision.
Anna noticed Dani and Mase sharing a meaningful glance across the table.
Becca took a deep breath. “Everything we’ve done has been leading up to this, and I know you won’t be happy with me for not sharing this vision earlier, but I swear, if I had, all would have been lost. Everything that’s happened needed to happen. I’m certain of it.”
Anna didn’t dare breathe. She doubted anyone did.
Except for Becca. Taking another deep breath, the serene young woman closed her eyes. “General Herodson…he’s coming for us. He’ll be here soon, and he won’t be alone.”
39
ZOE
DECEMBER 17, 1AE
The Farm, California
“General Herodson…he’s coming for us. He’ll be here soon, and he won’t be alone.”
A collective inhale followed Becca’s announcement, and the group roused—tensing, straightening, standing—then raised fretful voices that filled the dining room.
“What the hell, Becca?”
“Shit!”
“You knew the whole time?”
“This isn’t fucking happening…”
“How the hell could you keep this from us?”
“How soon is soon?”
“Saw that coming a mile away.”
My own heart rate jolted into panic mode, but it was the reality that this was going to happen that jump-started my fear, not that his coming was a surprise. Jake squeezed my knee beneath the table.
I stared at my mom and Peter, who were next to me for a moment, then glanced at my dad and Jason. While Jason’s jaw flexed, he said nothing. I wasn’t the only one unsurprised by Becca’s revelation. It would only have been a matter of time before Herodson reappeared, harassing and threatening our family again. This time, I knew, would be different. One way or another, I felt certain that this time would be the last.
Becca’s gaze darted around like she was second-guessing herself. “It had to be this way,” she said, almost too quietly to hear.
Mase stood up, stoic and protective. �
��Listen,” he said flatly, his voice commanding the room. Sanchez’s hand was on her hip as she stood at her seat, the other rubbing her temple. Grayson and Chris were having a quiet but animated conversation with Harper at their end of the table, while Biggs’s eyes flicked frantically toward the sleeping twins in the living room. Gabe pushed his plate away from himself and rested his elbows on the table, all the while Larissa sat silent and observant, and Annie and Sam simply stared at the adults, eyes wide as they played with the remaining broth in their bowls.
“I told you, all of you, that you would need us. This is why,” Becca said with more certainty.
Harper stood in silent distress, his chair scraping against the floor as he pushed it out behind him. Everyone looked at him. The look on his face summoned hot chills down my arms and up my neck, and then I saw it—still images of his vision. A mass of hostile, unfamiliar faces flashed in his mind, then a wash of crimson blood, and I felt Harper’s growing fear.
“Becca’s right,” he said, his gaze scanning us all with a furrowed brow. “We need them. I’ve seen the soldiers in my dreams.” When his gaze landed and stayed on Becca, he nodded. “The Re-gens are our only hope.”
Sanchez scoffed, her eyes darting between Becca and Harper. “But you could’ve said something so we at least knew to start preparing for a goddamn war.”
“We have children to think about now,” Biggs added. “And New Bodega might be in danger, as well.”
I glanced at Dani, wrapped in Jason’s protective arms, both of them watching the intensity rise in the room. I wondered what churned in my brother’s mind. Strangely, from Dani’s mind, I didn’t sense surprise, but more like a sense of understanding.
“If I had told you sooner, you would’ve changed the path, but not the inevitable future,” Becca retorted. She pointed in the direction of the Re-gen farms a couple hills to the west. “The Re-gens wouldn’t be here to help you if we’d changed course. Jason might never have been found—he might even be dead.” She looked at Gabe and then at my mom. “We wouldn’t have Dr. Wesley to help us, either.”
My mom’s eyes widened, and she took a deep breath and stood. “Becca’s right. I’m the only one who might be able to stop him.”
“Mom—” Peter said, but she spoke over him.
“I’ll go to him. I’ll leave right now.” My mom looked around the room, at all the expectant faces. “I’m the one he wants, I can change his mind.”
“No,” Peter said, jumping out of his seat. “You can’t go back there.” Tears filled his eyes. “He’ll kill you.”
Our mom wrapped her arm around his shoulders, trying to calm him. “No he won’t, sweetheart. Your father needs me. He won’t hurt me, I promise.” But Peter and I both knew her promise was an empty one. With the General, there were no certainties.
“What makes you think that after leaving the Colony with Jason and Peter, Herodson will show you any sympathy?” I asked bitterly, unwilling to consider her leaving as an option. “He knows you weren’t under his mind spell, that you’re immune to him. He knows he can no longer control you. Going back is suicide. It’s pointless. We could use you here; you know how he thinks.”
My mom’s eyes shifted from me to Peter. “Sweetheart, I have to try to—”
“Wes is right,” Gabe said, exhaling as he gazed around at the distraught faces staring at him. “She’s the only one who stands a chance against him. He has too many men at his disposal, too many Abilities. Our best option is that she gets him to stand down.”
I knew how difficult it was for Gabe to say those words, how acerbic they were on his tongue. But I couldn’t allow it. “You can’t send her back there,” I said, standing. “You of all people know what he’s capable of. She doesn’t stand a chance, especially not alone. You don’t even want her to go.”
Gabe’s fists met the tabletop and the dishes shook and clinked. “Of course I don’t want her to go back there, but what other options do we have? To fight? We don’t stand a chance against an army!”
“We’ll think of something!” I shouted back at him. I met my dad’s absent stare but looked away just as quickly. I couldn’t worry about the tumultuous thoughts tumbling around in his mind when I had enough of my own to deal with. “Becca,” I said, looking at her. “How much time do we have?”
Her eyes darted around the table. “I’m not sure,” she said quietly. “But in my vision, Gabe and Sanchez are still a little scraped up from the accident.” We all looked at them, as if their faces somehow held the answers we needed.
“We don’t know if sending my mom anywhere would even help,” I said, glancing around the table. “Unless Herodson has enough planes to transport his army, their caravan has already left Colorado and could be here by tomorrow.”
“Let’s hope to God that he’s not,” Chris said, and she tossed her napkin onto the table as she stood. “We need to prepare for him to be on our doorstep at any moment.”
Becca cleared her throat. But with all the noise, no one heard her begin to speak.
“Quiet!” Mase shouted, and again, everyone froze.
Clearing her throat again, Becca said, “You forget that his numbers are smaller and his loyalties are divided. Although I do not know how many still follow him, I know they are few in comparison to before. We have the Re-gens now. We have Dr. Wesley. We have strong Abilities and the advantage of him being here, where he’s not as familiar with the layout of the land.”
“Where is here, Becca? The farm?” my dad asked, his voice calm and steady. “Will it happen in New Bodega?”
“You will encounter him on the road in the farmlands, the one lined with eucalyptus—”
“Lakeville,” Jason said. “It’s here in Petaluma; the trees start a few miles off the freeway.”
“It’s the quickest route to us,” Jake added, being all too familiar with the roads from his weeks of searching for Jason.
Becca nodded. “It will be morning when he comes.” Both Jake and Jason scooted their chairs backward and stood.
“Chris, Sanchez. Let’s get an inventory of our ammo,” Jason said, falling back into his normal role as our fearless leader. “Dad, I’ll need you and Gabe to set up a trip into town. Dani, maybe you can help them make contact. We’re going to need all the help we can get.”
I grabbed Jake’s arm. “I think it’s time for that transfusion now,” I said.
Jake nodded. “Tell Harper to get everything ready.”
~~~~~
I lay bleary-eyed in my bed, recovering. Jake, exhausted and regenerating, slept beside me. The fact that Jake was asleep, knowing the General and his armed forces could be here in the morning, was a testament to how much of a toll the transfusions took on him, no matter how little blood he needed to give. I brushed my fingertips over the tanned skin of his hand splayed out on my stomach. I was beginning to understand that while blood was vital and kept us all alive, it was more than that to Jake—it was his life force. I could feel its energy and animation as it cycled throughout my body, refueling me. It was like I’d been running on fumes, and now I felt full and sated. The sensation was only a glimpse of his raw vitality and strength, and it felt otherworldly.
I peered up at the ceiling. The room was darkening as the final rays of sun slinked behind the hills, and the candlelight cast flickering shadows all around. I knew I should try to get some rest too, though it seemed impossible. According to the animals, the General wasn’t close—at least not yet—but that didn’t matter. He was coming, and that was enough to scare the exhaustion from every cell in my body.
There was a gentle rap on the bedroom door, and it slowly creaked open. My mom poked her head in. When she saw Jake lying beside me, she straightened. “I didn’t mean to bother you,” she whispered. “Since the door was open a smidge, I thought I’d check on you.”
“He’s dead to the world,” I said quietly, nodding to Jake. “You can come in if you want.”
Tentatively, my mom stepped inside with a steaming mug i
n her hand, and I sat up against the pillows.
“Gabe showed me the herb garden, and I saw the chamomile. I figured you could use some.” She set the mug on my nightstand. “It’s what Peter likes to drink on his bad nights, when he can’t sleep. Danielle said you preferred coffee, but I didn’t think that was—”
“Tea’s perfect,” I said, cutting in. “Thanks, Mom.”
Her eyes widened infinitesimally, and she lowered herself to the edge of the bed.
I frowned. “Should I not call you that?” I asked, feeling a returning tightness in my chest. “I won’t if—”
She shook her head, her dark hair swooshing against her face. My hair was still longer than hers, at least in the front where it touched my collarbone, and I wondered if she’d ever let her bob grow past her jaw, down past her shoulders like the picture I’d seen of her from so long ago.
She peered down at her hands clasped in her lap. “Of course you can call me Mom,” she said, finally looking at me. “I’m just surprised you want to, after everything.”
The last time I’d seen her she’d ripped my heart out and refused to be a part of our family. But so much had happened since then, and all of that changed…
Tears, once again, could not be kept at bay, though I tried to blink them away. I worked to steady my breath before I spoke. “Having you back,” I started and took another deep breath. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted…a mom. My mom.” I stared down at my fingernails, longer than usual, as I picked restlessly at them. I sniffed and wiped away a stray tear. Pull your shit together, Zoe. But I couldn’t. I was only just grasping the fact that the biggest battle of my life so far was finally over, and my mom was sitting right in front of me, tears in her eyes, too. More tears came, and I covered my face with my hands. “I’m sorry. I’m a mess.”
“Oh, Zoe,” she said, and her warm arms wrapped around me. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered as she stroked the back of my hair. “I didn’t want to leave you. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, you have no idea—I’m so sorry.” She rocked me back and forth, and I could feel her chest heaving against mine as she held me, consoled me, like the mother I’d always needed. “I’m so sorry,” she repeated, and I tightened my hold on her. “Shhh, I’m here now,” she whispered, and soon my tears began to cease. My mom was there in front of me, holding me.
The Ending Series: The Complete Series Page 164