“No, Neely. You were mesmerized by a life that might never be without Erik.”
“Yes, but one that I really didn’t value if I’d thought about it.” She studied his face, and saw only tenderness. She continued, getting closer and closer to what he needed to know—her determination to remain pure, Erik’s manipulation, her fears of losing him. “I know now it was pride. I didn’t love Erik, but I was proud that he’d picked me.”
She lowered her gaze, feeling her confession slip to her tongue. “He was going away to college. I couldn’t afford to live on a campus. I had to leave home so I registered for class at Oakland University. It’s a good college, but it didn’t offer me the excitement of living away from home like Erik was doing.”
She swallowed. “Erik said he wanted me to guarantee my love for him and to be true to him while he was away. I didn’t know how to do that. How do you guarantee love?” Her lungs failed her.
“And Erik told you how.” Jonny filled in the blank.
She nodded. “So I gave up all that was important to me, and soiled my—”
Jonny pressed his finger against her lips. “I know about that, Neely. You don’t have to tell me.”
Her head flew back, her eyes searching his. “You know?”
He nodded. “For years.”
Her stomach churned. She felt nauseous. “Erik told you?”
“Yes.”
“I suppose he told everyone of his conquest.”
Jonny didn’t respond. Instead he tilted her head and brushed his lips against hers. “It doesn’t matter anymore, Neely. Erik’s conquests didn’t ruin anyone’s reputation but his own.”
“And he cheated on me even though I’d given in to him time after time until I was sick and disgusted with myself.”
“That’s Erik’s modus operandi, my love. He’s cheated on most women he’s dated. A man like him gives all men a bad name.”
“Not you. You’re a beautiful man, and—”
“Neely, I’m not perfect. I’ve done things I’m sorry for, but it doesn’t make me who I am. I know the Lord has forgiven my mistakes. When I faced Him with my sins, He forgave me. I had to learn to forgive myself. Sin began in the Garden of Eden. It’s part of the human condition. All we can do is strive to learn from our mistakes and not repeat them. You’ve suffered long enough for yours.”
The truth will set you free. Why hadn’t she allowed those words to seep into her mind and heart and follow them?
“It’s time to let it go. You’re pure in my eyes and in God’s.”
She pressed her lips together, holding back her tears. When she could talk without a sob, she thanked him for reminding her of God’s grace. Then she did what she’d wanted to do all evening. “Happy New Year, Jonny.” She drew her head upward and pressed her lips against his.
Jonny cupped her head in his hand, his mouth warm and inviting. Every worry and fear swept away in the sweetness of his kiss. Tonight the barriers had fallen, the fears had flown away like startled birds, and her heart sang. Tonight was truly the beginning of a new year—a year of freedom from the past with no more searching for something to fill her emptiness or avoiding love because it meant telling the truth. Tonight she’d been set free.
* * *
“Happy birthday to you.” Neely gathered with the others, watching Joey’s excitement as they sang the birthday song.
“I’m this many.” He lifted three fingers, his grin spreading from dimple to dimple.
Neely studied her sister’s expression, a mixture of happiness and sorrow, and she understood. She aimed the camera as Ashley set the birthday cake with lit candles in front of Joey. He puckered not really knowing how to blow out the candles but making a valiant effort. Spittle sputtered from his lips, but Ashley caught it before it landed on the cake. Everyone laughed, even Joey.
Photographs were taken of her dad and his grandson, Ash and Joey, and Ashley took one of her holding Joey with cake on his cheeks. Gifts were opened, cake and coffee enjoyed, and Jonny found his place on the floor beside Joey helping him with a big wooden puzzle, everything a child’s birthday should be. All except a father who should have been there to see his son turn three.
She swallowed the thought, her emotions raw from the memories she’d shared with Ashley. Little had been said about Erik, but Neely sensed that when the time was right Ashley would need to give that closure, too. She’d learned that life wasn’t always smooth sailing, as the old expression said. Rough winds, storm and tempest tossed the fragile boats they sailed in, but always the promise of a rainbow kept people going. Neely had experienced hers, and she looked at him beside Joey as prickles of emotion skittered along her arms.
Four years. She shook her head. Four years was nothing in the scheme of things. What was important was how years were spent. Even though it had gone unstated, Jonny’s love lifted her spirit and calmed her tears. He’d allowed her to confess her past, forgave her without being asked, and held her close as if he also felt her pain.
The pain flittered away day by day since they’d opened their hearts three weeks earlier, a night she would never forget—for the confession as well as Erik’s downfall. She’d seen him a couple of times, a new woman on his arm. She always sent up a prayer for the woman, that she would not give in to Erik’s wiles without knowing the repercussions.
To this day, she tried to recall what Erik had offered her back then. Remembering, she guessed he’d been less experienced and a bit more innocent than he was today. She assumed with time he’d polished his ability to sway a woman to his needs, but the idea saddened her. Erik, too, was trying to fulfill an emptiness that lust would never fill. Contentment came from within, supported by people who offered love and understanding and a God who offered grace and mercy.
She brushed a tear from her eye, then realized Jonny had been watching her. A couple of neighbors had dropped in with gifts for Joey, and the conversation billowed in the room. Ashley rose from an easy chair. “I’ll make more coffee.” She beckoned Neely to follow, and in the kitchen, she drew her away from the door. “I haven’t talked much about New Year’s Eve, I know.”
“That’s fine, Ash. I don’t need to—”
She lifted her palm. “I want to thank you and Jon for coming when I called, but most of all I want you to know I’m okay. I realize Erik was the first man I kissed since Adam. I shared something that had been beautiful to me with a man who didn’t understand. I didn’t listen to your caution out of my own guilt, I think.”
“Guilt. Why?”
“Cheating on Adam.” She held up her finger. “I know. Adam’s in heaven and wants me to move on in life, and now I know I can. Erik gave me that, at least. I’m not ready for much more than a friendship right now, but I think you are. I hope you and Johnny are talking about the future, and—”
“I’m confident that he’ll say something soon.”
Ashley nuzzled closer and elbowed her in the ribs. “I told you so.”
She laughed, remembering their talk that seemed so long ago. “I finally told him about Erik and what happened. He already knew.”
Her eyes widened. “You’re kidding.”
“Would I kid about that?”
A chuckle burst from her sister, and Neely gave her a hug. “Living in the past keeps us from growing and experiencing life. I’m ready to live, and so are you. Just slow and easy.”
The embrace bound them together, but even more the shared experience bound them for a lifetime. Neely prayed the Lord bless Ashley so that one day she’d find someone worthy of her and Joey. And it would happen, she sensed it.
“Can I help?” Jonny strode into the kitchen, eyed them in their embrace and laughed. “Your dad has made similar entrances and ended what might have been a special moment. I hope I haven’t done that.”
Neely sputtered a laugh, reca
lling their kisses ending before they began. “No. Your entrance was perfect. And I don’t think Dad will end any more special moments. Not anymore.”
He slipped his arm around her while Ashley winged her elbow nearby in a playful jab. “Told you so.”
Chapter Seventeen
“Neely, wait up.”
She stopped in the school parking lot and turned, her Valentine balloons spinning on the wintry wind.
Jon jogged toward her, a smile brightening his face. He slipped his arm around her shoulders blocking the cold air. He came to her rescue in so many ways not only warming her from the cold but warming her heart from emptiness.
She glanced up, pushing her icy lips into a smile. “What’s up with you?”
“Happy Valentine’s Day.” A gleeful look beamed in his eyes. “I’ll pick you up at seven for dinner, if that’s good.”
“It’s fine.” She’d already agreed once, and she wondered why he’d forgotten. “Daddy’s taken care of tonight. I can’t believe he’s actually going out to dinner with some cronies. That was a great idea you had taking him to the senior center for lunch.”
He shrugged her shoulder. “It’s good to reconnect with old friends, and I encouraged him to join their walking club. The exercise is good for him.”
Her chest constricted picturing her dad enjoying life again. “Did I tell you this? The other day Dad told me a woman named Alice invited him to some kind of fellowship at her church.” She’d reached her car and hit the remote.
Jonny chuckled. “I figured that might happen. Your dad’s a good-looking guy.” He grasped the door handle and pulled it open. “And an invitation to church. That’s a bonus.”
She edged onto the seat as the three balloons flapped outside in the breeze.
Jonny grabbed two and shoved them in, but the heart-shaped balloon that said Be My Valentine refused to be captured. He manipulated the string and pushed it inside with the others before leaning over to kiss her. “See you soon.”
“Can’t wait.” Her chest constricted when she looked into his eyes. No matter how many hours, even days, she’d spent in his company the thrill of looking at him never ended. He was special, not only with her, but her dad, sister and Joey. When the Lord gave gifts, He truly gave blessings.
Jonny waved, hunkered beneath his down-filled jacket and hurried off to his SUV as she pulled away. He’d made reservations somewhere but hadn’t told her. The only thing she knew was that he’d be wearing a sports coat. She couldn’t even guess what he had in mind.
Valentine’s Day with all its hearts and flowers had meant little to her over the years. Her friends had spouted their special plans, and she’d seen TV commercials and newspaper ads touting romantic gifts, but the information flew over her head. February 14 meant nothing more to her than it being the day before February 15.
Not today. Today he’d surprised her with the balloon bouquet and the cute heart balloon that said Be My Valentine. She’d been teased by the others in the office, but she’d enjoyed knowing that her life had been changed by Jonny Turner, her best friend’s brother.
The reality still hit her on occasion, but instead of grimacing, she always lifted her head toward heaven with a thank you for Jonny being in her life.
Despite the heavy snowfall the day before, roads were clear, and she turned into the driveway, noticing her dad had parked on the street which always gave her a clue that he had plans and didn’t want to be blocked in. The change in her dad since Jonny had come into their lives amazed her.
When she stepped inside, a sense of home wrapped around her. She still wanted to get a place of her own, but for now she and her dad had developed a playful relationship that they seemed to enjoy. She told him what to do, and he offered a sarcastic rebuttal. She grinned, recalling some of his comments. If only he’d been able to enjoy her mother’s company in the same way.
Pushing the darker memory aside, she tied the balloons to a chair back, slipped off her jacket and hung it on a hook in the laundry room. Giving a final look at the Be My Valentine message, she strode to the living room. “What time are you leaving, Daddy?”
“Can’t wait to get rid of your old man, can you?” He flashed her a look that tried to hide his grin.
She arched a brow. “I want to make sure you’re gone before my date arrives. I’m too old to have my father tell me what time to get home.”
He couldn’t hide his chuckle. “I tried to pay that guy to hogtie and keep you. It hasn’t worked yet.”
She sidled next to him and kissed his cheek. “You can’t fool me, Daddy. You’d miss me.”
“But I’d gain a son-in-law.”
That he would. And she’d have a wonderful husband. Her pulse skipped at the possibility. The comfort and joy, the excitement and fullness radiated inside her. Toting her old attitude, she’d expected marriage to escape her, but the unexpected happened instead when Jonny charged toward her on the football field. That day burned into her memory. It was the day her life had changed.
She strode into the kitchen, grabbed an apple and headed up the stairs. If Jonny planned to dress up a little, she wanted to do the same. She opened her closet and scanned her wardrobe. Nothing jumped out at her. Sinking to the edge of the mattress, she reviewed her dressier clothes. One day she needed to revamp her outfits. She’d lost thirty pounds since she’d come home and started exercising. That was more than two full sizes. Half of her clothes looked as if she’d borrowed them from someone with a larger frame.
After perusing her wardrobe, she pulled out a maroon dress, simple but she liked the cowl neckline and the long sleeves. With a gold necklace and drop earrings, she would look presentable. She lay out the clothes, located her black pumps and a clutch bag, then dropped on the edge of the bed, looking forward to the evening.
When her father’s voice reached her, she rose and went to the stairs. “Are you going?”
“Yep. I’m on my way. Have fun.” His eyes sparkled, gazing at her from the bottom of the staircase.
“You, too, Daddy.”
She stood a moment until she heard the door close. Then she headed for the bathroom and ran water in the tub. A few minutes later, she leaned back against the porcelain, enjoying the scent of lavender.
Her mind had been filled with Rainie’s wedding shower which she was hosting in another two months, and a few job openings had come to her attention. Part of her loved being close to Jonny, but the other part faced reality. If she wanted a home of her own, she needed to up her income, but sometimes she pictured living in Jonny’s house. All it needed was a little feminine touch. Hers, preferably.
Grinning, she nestled her body deeper into the water, but soon she forced herself to leave the tub behind. Her hair needed a curling iron to control her natural wave, and she slipped into her dress and shoes, attached her jewelry and strode down the stairs, anxious to see the man of her dreams. Jonny had become part of her as easy and familiar as buttering toast.
When his headlights flashed across the wall, she headed for the front closet and pulled out her dressy coat as the doorbell rang. She opened the door, her coat on her arm. “I’m ready.” As the words left her, she realized he had his hands full.
She pushed open the storm door, gazing at the lovely bouquet of red and white flowers. “Jonny, they’re beautiful, but—” Before she could finish, his lips met hers, the bouquet gripped behind her.
When she backed away, she noticed a heart-shaped box as well, and she grinned. “The flowers are gorgeous.”
He handed them to her. “Glad you like them.” He strode past her and headed for the kitchen.
She followed, watching him open the cabinet where she kept vases. He pulled one down and set it on the counter. “I’ll leave the arranging to you.” He turned and spied the balloons. “Be My Valentine.”
Seeing the express
ion on his face, she couldn’t control her chuckle. “I am, and on top of everything else—balloons and flowers—you didn’t need to bring me candy. Are you trying to fatten me up again?”
He shook his head. “You know how I feel about that.” He slipped the heart-shaped box on the table. “Your dad will enjoy some chocolates when he gets home.”
“You always think of him.” She faced the counter and placed the flowers in the vase, thinking she’d arrange them later. When she turned back, he’d sneaked up behind her, and now she stood in his arms.
He motioned to the arrangement. “Did you read the note?”
“Note?” She shook her head and pulled the small envelope from the flower bouquet. She opened it and slipped out the card. “Will you be mine?” She grinned. “The balloons asked the same question, and—”
“Not so.”
She eyed the heart balloon bobbing from the chair and read the message. “Be my Valentine. Okay, I suppose that is a little different.”
“Much different.” He brushed her cheek with his finger, his eyes searching hers.
She read the card again. Will you be mine? Her pulse skipped, hoping she wasn’t reading something into his question. “You’re right.”
“Let’s have a piece of candy before you answer the question.” He handed her the box again, and for the first time, she noticed the cellophane had been removed. “You’ve already eaten some?”
“Only one piece.”
His eyes sparkled, sending her pulse skittering. She lifted the lid, and the air escaped her as she saw what was inside. Where a piece of candy should have been, a small velvet box sat in the middle of the heart. “Jonny.” Tears blurred her eyes.
He took the candy box from her hand. “Open it.”
Her Valentine Hero Page 19