“I won’t,” she lied.
“Call me at lunchtime.”
She nodded dutifully.
He paused, as though he wanted to say something else. Then, with an almost imperceptible shake of his head, he left.
As soon as he was out the door, she regretted her abrupt dismissal of his offer. Her thoughts were troubled as she drove to work and parked her rental car behind the building. Instead of making any rash decisions about her relationship with Adam, she cleaned the store from top to bottom, immersing herself in the task.
Being at Zócalo always calmed her nerves.
She dusted the shelves, polished the inventory, and mopped the floor. Cardboard boxes were piled high in the storage room and she had dozens of mail orders to fill, but she wanted to wash the front window first. Dirty glass was her number-one pet peeve. Smudged fingerprints and smog residue, her enemies.
Kari took a bucket outside, frowning as her squeegee sailed along the glass. Her new sign would be delivered tomorrow so she really wanted the storefront to sparkle. When she was finished, she studied the shining surface, looking for spots she’d missed.
A squeal of tires at the closest intersection diverted her attention. She glanced down the street, concerned.
The noise was caused by minor traffic congestion, not even a fender-bender. But her tummy twisted with panic. Memories of Chuy’s hands on her throat assaulted her senses. She closed her eyes, seeing flashes of blood and fire. She heard the roar of the SUV, the report of gunfire, the deafening blast of explosives.
Taking a deep breath, she opened her eyes. The commotion cleared and her anxiety eased, but her knees felt wobbly as she ducked back inside the store. After she put away her cleaning supplies, she paced the aisles, unable to relax.
The impulse basket looked a little disorganized, so she rummaged through it, sorting baby booties and stocking caps. For some reason, she lingered over the rebozos. She’d left one of the shawls tied in baby-sling style to demonstrate its purpose. With a small frown, she slipped it over her shoulder, sticking her hand in the empty pouch.
Since Sasha’s miscarriage, she’d been too focused on work. She realized that now. As much as she loved Zócalo, she longed for more. She wanted a family, close friends and a vivid personal life.
She wanted children.
That desire had been vague and open-ended, more of a hazy wish than a distinct plan for the future, until the day she’d modeled the rebozo for Adam. That act, in his presence, had set her biological clock into motion. His niece and nephew were cute as buttons. Kari could easily picture a black-haired infant sleeping against her chest.
The door signal sounded, startling her from her thoughts. She turned to see Adam walking through the entrance. When he saw what she was wearing, he stopped in his tracks. “Making plans?” he asked, smiling a little.
She jerked her hand from the pouch and pulled the sling over her head, tossing it away like a live snake. “Of course not.”
“I thought I’d take you to lunch.”
“Is it noon already?”
He arched a brow. “It’s two o’clock.”
“Oh,” she said, perplexed. “I guess I lost track of time.”
“Why don’t we spend the rest of the afternoon at the beach? I have a blanket in my car. We can go for a swim or take a nap in the sun.”
“I have to work.”
He gave her a measured look. “You should be resting.”
“I’m fine,” she insisted, but the tears that filled her eyes said otherwise. Hiding them from him, she turned and rearranged two clay figurines on a shelf. Because her hands were shaking, she succeeded only in knocking one over. It tumbled to the floor and shattered. Her vision blurred as she knelt to pick up the shards.
Adam crouched down beside her, grasping her wrists. “Leave it.”
“I can’t.”
“Come away with me.”
She wanted to go with him. Her desire to cling to his neck and collapse in his arms was so strong that she almost tucked her head against his chest, wilting with relief. But something held her back. One last thread of resistance.
Everyone she’d loved had left—or died. She couldn’t bear to lose him, too. If she could just put a little distance between them, she wouldn’t feel so vulnerable. A protective barrier would keep her from getting hurt.
“I think I need some space,” she whispered, avoiding his gaze.
He didn’t let her go immediately. After a long, painful moment, he released her and straightened. She picked up the clay pieces and took them to the trash. He shoved his hands into his pockets, staring out at the light midday traffic. “Should I wait for you to call then?”
She glanced away, her throat tightening with emotion. He was referencing their conversation about how to let a man down easy. The irony rose up, threatening to choke her. There was nothing easy about this. “Yes.”
A muscle in his jaw clenched. She thought he might give her a curt nod and walk out the door, but he didn’t. He had the strength to school his expression and come forward, kissing her stunned cheek. “Goodbye,” he said in a husky voice, and left.
Kari watched him go, her heart breaking. She knew she’d hurt him but she couldn’t bear to imagine the alternative. For a few minutes, she stood behind the glass counter, feeling numb. Then customers started trickling in, offering a welcome distraction.
She’d sold two pricey stoneware items when Adam reappeared.
Although Kari didn’t want to have an emotional scene in public, he didn’t give her any choice.
“Sorry, but I have to do this,” he said, coming behind the counter. She retreated a step, bracing her palms on the glass surface behind her. He slid his hand around the nape of her neck, lowering his mouth to hers for a thorough kiss.
Then he got down on one knee, and really stole her breath away. “Kari, I love you. If you really need space, I’ll give it to you. But I know from experience that time is precious and I’d like to make the most of it.”
“What are you saying?”
He took a black velvet box from his pocket and opened it, revealing a vintage diamond ring that must have cost a bundle. “I want to marry you.”
“You don’t even know me!”
“I know that you’re the love of my life.”
Her stomach fluttered at his words. When he laid his heart on the line, he didn’t do it halfway.
“I love you, Kari. I love how passionate and dedicated you are. I love the way you work hard and stay strong and never give up. You fought for your sister, for this store, even for Maria. You’ll do anything for your friends and family.”
Tears filled her eyes and she blinked them away, flustered.
“I understand that you’re mourning your sister and I’ll wait as long as you want me to, but I can’t walk away without telling you how I feel.” Rising to his feet, he cupped her face, rubbing his thumb over her cheek. “I need you, bella.”
Her lips parted under his and he gave her a toe-curling kiss that was totally inappropriate for work. Pressing her against the counter, he plundered her mouth with his tongue while she squirmed against him, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt.
When he was finished, they were both panting.
The trio of women standing by the entrance twittered at their sensual display. Kari gasped and pushed away from him, blushing.
“I’m going to leave now and let you think it over,” he said, pressing the velvet box into her limp palm. Wrapping her fingers around it, he kissed the back of her hand. On his way out, he acknowledged the gaping customers. “Ladies.”
The women came in and browsed her shelves while Kari clutched the ring box, her entire body trembling. She probably looked like she’d been screwing Adam against the front counter. But she wasn’t worried about her mussed appearance or her lack of professionalism. A sudden realization swept over her, and it rocked her to the core.
Losing Adam wasn’t the worst thing that could happen. It would be far more
devastating to let him slip through her fingers because she wasn’t courageous enough to hold on to him. Avoiding his love wasn’t going to keep her from feeling pain. It would prevent her from feeling alive.
“Excuse me,” she said, striding to the front window and turning the sign around. “I’m closing early.”
Two of the women seemed annoyed about getting ushered out the door, and rightly so, but the third winked at Kari. “Go get him, honey. If I had a man like that chasing after me, I wouldn’t hang around here, either.”
“Sorry for the inconvenience,” she said. “Come back and I’ll give you half off anything in the store.”
After locking up, she hurried down the street, searching for Adam’s retreating form. She caught sight of him next to his parked car. “Wait!”
He paused, turning to face her.
“Take me with you.”
When she started running, he strode toward her. She launched herself into his arms, clinging to him. “I love you, too.”
“What?”
“I love you, Adam. I’ve loved you since that night we spent with your sister’s kids. I was afraid to admit it, even to myself. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. It’s just that I’ve lost everyone I loved, and I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you. I think I’ll die if I lose you, and that terrifies me.”
He hugged her closer. “I feel exactly the same way.”
“What can we do about it?”
“Live every day like it might be our last.”
“That sounds … financially irresponsible.”
He laughed, kissing the top of her head. “I mean that we can try not to take our time together for granted, not that we should stop paying the bills. I want to build a life with you, Kari. A family, if you want one.”
“I do,” she said, looking into his eyes.
They spent the afternoon at the beach, sharing a picnic lunch and walking hand in hand along the shore. She tried on his ring, which was a perfect fit. At sunset, he drove her to his house, where she agreed to spend the night.
He lifted her off her feet, carrying her across the threshold like a bride.
“Adam! What about your ribs?”
“They’re better.”
She pressed her lips to his neck. “I love you.”
Kicking the door shut, he took her straight to the bedroom, where they made the most of the evening—and then some.
Acknowledgments
As always, many special people helped to make this book possible.
Heartfelt thanks to Junessa Viloria, my editor, for the fantastic insight, and to Laurie McLean, my agent, for the enthusiastic support. High fives to the Bantam Dell art department for a smoking hot cover. Meow!
Thanks to my husband, for helping me brainstorm, and to my mom, for always offering to babysit. I’m so grateful for my beautiful children and wonderful family.
Special thanks to the Department of Homeland Security for allowing me to tour the San Ysidro Port of Entry in San Diego. Public Affairs Liaison Angelica De Cima took the time to answer my questions and show me around the facilities. The technology, professionalism, and dedication to security inspired me.
Thanks to the Customs and Border Protection officers who protect and serve this country.
BY JILL SORENSON
Crash into Me
Set the Dark on Fire
The Edge of Night
Caught in the Act
Caught in the Act Page 31