by Brown, TW
I could understand that sentiment. It was why I had gotten so involved once we had settled in at Serenity Base. I wanted to be in the mix so I knew for a fact about things. It was one thing to hear the soldiers talking about a run in the chow hall. It had been another thing entirely to be out there where I saw some of the worst things imaginable. It was on those runs that I really began to discover that zombies were not necessarily the biggest of our problems.
I gave Carol a hug and then I opened the door. I discovered that I was in the basement of a house. They had made a series of holding cells; just another sign of how advanced these people were in forming a cohesive settlement.
I exited the house and found myself momentarily blinded by the bright sunlight. A man was standing beside the woman who had spoken to me. I recognized him as the guy who had injected me in the chute. He did not look apologetic, but he was holding my gear out to me.
“You should probably put your gear on now,” the woman said. “There is still a great deal of zombie activity outside the fence. I fear your people may have left behind the wounded. Some of the towers report sporadic screams. I really am sorry.”
From her expression and the look in her eyes, I believed her. I accepted my gear from the man and suited up. I saw a few people pass by, but they did not seem interested in the slightest.
I was escorted to the fence and the same location where I had been allowed to enter this compound. Who was I kidding? This was a town. People were going about the business of regaining something like a normal life.
“Good luck, William,” the woman said from the closest tower where she had apparently climbed to see me off.
“Name’s Billy,” I called back. “Only my mom called me William, and then only when she was mad at me.”
“Very well…Billy it is. My name is Laura. I hope that I see you again…under the right circumstances.”
I gave a salute and started back to the compound. And that was all it was, I thought. We were getting a few things up and running like a food line for meals and Dr. Zahn had a mini-hospital. Still, we were just starting to piece things together.
The whole way over, I saw signs of the battle. I passed familiar faces that were either dead or with a bullet in the forehead. However, I also passed a few who had not been dealt with and had turned.
I made it a point to end every single “fresh” zombie that I encountered just because it was probably one of ours. It was going fine until I stumbled upon Shelly.
Shelly had been part of the group that hit us back at the cabin, but she had joined us and proved to be a real tough and capable fighter. She had also saved my ass when we hit Winters. I owed her my life. She had been torn in half. Spiking her was now the only way that I could repay her.
Twice I thought I saw somebody peek out from a house that I passed. It might have been a zombie, or maybe even the result of the gentle breeze that was blowing.
By the time I reached the gates of what was our compound, I had an idea of what I was going to do. Of course it all hinged on what happened when I got inside.
“Hands in the air!” a voice called down from the gate tower. I didn’t recognize it.
“It is Billy Haynes, I am one of you,” I called.
“I never heard of you,” the voice shot back.
“Go get Dr. Zahn, she will vouch for me. But while you do, you need to let me in. Cuff me or whatever, but don’t leave me out here. Lots of walkers in the area, and I’d prefer not to have to chance it with these things,” I said as I turned to take down a pair that had stumbled around the corner of a nearby house.
“Dr. Zahn ain’t been seen since before the attack,” the person called back. “But seeing as how you know about the doc, I guess we can let you in. You will need to go to the community center under guard, though. I am sure somebody will recognize you there if you are one of ours.”
I walked through the gate and was met by two people with crossbows. One of them was a woman named Betty. She dropped her aim. “He’s okay…one of us,” she announced.
“The gate guard said nobody has seen Dr. Zahn since before the attack?” I asked Betty. She gave me a nod.
I was not going to offer up her probable location. Whatever she was doing, she had her reasons. I would head over there myself as soon as I checked out just how bad things were here.
I was about to ask the first of what I figured to be a long series of questions when I heard my name called.
“Billy!” Katrina was sprinting my direction.
She threw herself into my arms and started kissing me. I was only a little uncomfortable with all the affection, but it was nice to be missed.
“I am so glad to see you,” she said. “This place is in shock. It is hard to tell if the zombies are inside or outside.”
“What the hell happened? I heard it was bad. Where’s Dr. Zahn? Where’s Jake?”
“Yeah, we have some catching up to do,” Katrina said with a deep sigh. “First the doctor. I never got there. As for Jake, I ran into his army less than ten minutes after I left you. I stayed hidden and let them pass, but when the fighting started, I couldn’t help it. Simon and the others had been with him…most of my original group. Only, by the time that I arrived, it was already a disaster and there were zombies coming from every direction, so I took off. Had to spend a night in the attic of a house until things settled down just a little.”
“Wait!” I held up my hands. “How long have I been gone?”
“Three days,” she answered with a puzzled look on her face.
“Damn, they really had me knocked out.” A lot of things were fighting for space in my brain. Dr. Zahn was tops on the list, but so were Melissa, Thalia, and the baby.
“Who?” Katrina asked.
“Never mind right now.” I waved the question away. “Details…what happened? Where is Jake?”
“He didn’t make it back. In fact, my best guess is that we are down to less than a hundred people. Everybody has been sleeping in the community center.”
“Jesus.”
It felt so anticlimactic. I was never going to find out what the hell had gotten in to Jake. He had been a strange one from the start, and obviously full of secrets. I tried to piece together a few things that might help me understand. The best thing that I could come up with was that he was a serious liar. He’d hidden his immune status, he’d pretended to be dim so that folks would ignore him, and it was he who had told me originally that there were only a few scattered groups of survivors here in La Grande. I now doubted that he was ignorant of the other group. In the back of my mind, I was starting to wonder if maybe he and Winters had some deeper connection.
I was struck by a peculiar thought. On television and in the movies, nothing was ever left unsolved. You always eventually found out the “who”, “What”, “Where”, or “why” at some point. I had a feeling that there would be a lot of things left unanswered in this crazy, horrifying world I now lived in.
I filled her in on my own adventure. Afterwards, I told her to meet me at my place; that I needed to take care of a few things and then decide exactly what I was going to do. She was hesitant, and insisted on accompanying me, but I told her to go pack a bag instead. When she asked if that meant I was leaving, I told her that I was not sure, but if she was intent on staying with me, it would be a good idea to be ready.
By then, we had reached the community center. She went down a hallway, I assume to wherever she was making her bed for the time being. I stood in the main entrance and scanned the crowd until I found who I was looking for. I cut through, only vaguely aware that nobody seemed to be paying me any mind. I was a stranger to most of these people.
“Billy!” Thalia squealed when she saw me and ran to me with her arms out.
I caught her and scooped her up, giving her a big hug. She had come a long way since that day in the woods when she put down the zombified remains of Buster, her dog. That day, I remember thinking that I would never see her smile again.
I stepped past two more children. It took me a second to realize that it was Rabia and her brother Levent. The boy had cut off all his hair…and so had his sister! Shaking my head, I stepped up to Melissa who was staring at me with an open mouth. I guess she must have figured that I was dead.
“How the…” Her voice strangled on a sob and tears rolled down her face.
I set Thalia down and gave Melissa a hug. I peeked over her shoulder to see the baby sleeping peacefully. I was jealous. What must it be like to sleep without nightmares? I could not remember the last time that had happened for me.
I gave her an even briefer version of my adventure. When I was done, I knelt before her and looked to make sure that nobody was listening in. I had made my decision right there and then and had no clue how it might be accepted by others.
“I am going back there. I want you, Thalia, and the baby to come as well. In fact, tell anybody from just our group that were living at the campground. We go first thing in the morning. Keep it quiet.”
She looked at me funny. It was clear that she did not understand my request. Funny thing? Neither did I exactly.
“I am getting a strange feeling here,” I said. “I have no better explanation than that. But my fear is that somebody might try to stop us, or worse, call us traitors and perhaps even attack us.”
After she assured me that she would keep it to just our “original” (albeit slightly extended) circle, I gave Thalia another hug and set out for my next destination.
Just as when I had made my way back to the compound, I found that the zombie activity was really above average. Even traveling through back yards and trying to keep a low profile, I had to keep my machete in hand.
At last, I found the house by the hospital where I had left Dr. Zahn and Sunshine. Standing outside, I suddenly had a terrible feeling wash over me. One thing that the good doctor was not, and that was irresponsible. Completely vanishing from the compound without letting anybody know would fall under that category in my opinion.
Preparing myself for the worst—that would be the zombified versions of Dr. Zahn and Sunshine waiting inside for me—I opened the door. I did not enter, but instead just stood on the porch for a moment and waited to see if anything would shamble out to greet me.
When nothing did, I ventured inside. Shutting the door so I would have less area to keep an eye on, I moved for the hallway and the room that I had carried that child zombie to when Darla, Dr. Zahn, and I had arrived. Just outside the door, I heard the first sound. It was a soulless moan.
Taking a deep breath, I opened the door slowly. The child zombie was present and accounted for. It was chained to the far wall and could not reach the entrance. The creature eyed me, but it was moving back and away from me, coming to a stop only when its back was against the wall. I could see a few toys scattered about, including a few dolls which I thought was sick and twisted. There was also a full length mirror on the wall just to my left.
What I did not see was any sign of Dr. Zahn or Sunshine. I gave the child zombie another look and shut the door. As soon as I did, I heard it moan again. It was like the thing was sad and lonely and wanted me to come back. I scolded myself, insisting that I was reading a lot into that one sound, but that was the honest to goodness feeling that hit me when I heard it.
I turned around, and would have screamed if a hand had not covered my mouth. Standing there were Dr. Zahn, Sunshine, and Darla. I very gently removed the hand that was covering my mouth and glared at the trio.
“What in the hell are you doing?” I snapped.
“I told you that I was running tests on the child zombie in hopes to figure out a few things.”
“You do know that Jake led an attack on another community…this one about three or four times our size and much better equipped. He’s most likely dead, along with well over half the population of our group.” I let that last statement just hang there for a second. I was a little surprised at how much reaction I did not receive.
“Never trusted him,” Dr. Zahn said with a shrug. “Something about him just didn’t sit right.”
“Jon was always telling me to watch him,” Sunshine said with a sigh.
“And you didn’t think to let anybody know?” I snapped.
She shot an embarrassed look at me after her eyes darted to the doctor. That was just great, I thought. Unfortunately there was no time to deal with this particular situation. I found myself glaring at Dr. Zahn. No surprise, she did not seem to notice…or care.
I filled them in on as much as I knew about the situation at the compound and then what I had been through. I explained my plan and then waited for the response.
“I think you are making the right choice,” Dr. Zahn finally said. “And unfortunately, I do not think that I will find out anything more here.” She sighed and I saw a bit of sadness flicker across her face.
“Did you find out anything?” I dared to ask.
“Nothing concrete, but I have a few theories.”
“Why not tell me about them on the way back.”
Fine,” the doctor agreed. “But I need to take care of something first.”
She moved past me and entered the room where her “subject” was kept. I heard her speaking softly, then I heard the familiar sound of a blade splitting a skull. Seconds later, the doctor emerged. I could not be certain, but I thought I saw her wipe away a tear from her eye.
We exited the house and headed back to the compound. On the way, the doc explained her hypothesis.
“This…whatever it is, be it viral or some bizarre pathogen, it takes root in the brain. I believe that the odd behavior we are seeing in the children can be attributed to the fact that a child’s mind is in a state of hyper-development where the learning and growth is exponential. Perhaps there is some part of the brain that continues to function after the change. I mean, something has to be driving these creatures. Perhaps it is a kernel from the most primordial portion of the human brain. If that is the case, maybe there is more that remains intact in these children zombies. Perhaps partial messages are able to form.
“As I said, this is really only my best guess. If I had a proper lab, perhaps I could open up a few of these things, make some slides, really get in and try to see what is going on. I doubt there will ever be any sort of cure, but it would be nice to at least try.”
“Maybe at this other community…they will give you that chance,” I offered. It seemed like a pretty reasonable course of action for somebody like Dr. Zahn to take. Besides, why would anybody object to trying to find out what is happening, and why the children zombies act so differently?
***
I have seen a lot of expressions of all sorts of emotions in this past year. What I saw at our compound was painful even if so many of those people were strangers. It was worse seeing it in those I knew.
The complete absence of hope. For so many, I guess the toll of the past year reached saturation. Some of the survivors in the compound were just leaving as we arrived. They were not headed to the other community; they were simply leaving. Many carried nothing in the form of supplies. One such person was Melinda Cribbs.
I saw her walking down the middle of the street. There were five walkers on her heels and she did not seem to care. I took off at a run and cut them down as quickly as possible. Through it all Melinda continued to walk like nothing was happening. At last I caught up with her.
“Where are you going?” I asked. I was having to walk backwards as I spoke because she still was not slowing down.
“Texas,” was her emotionless one word reply.
“But—” I wanted to protest, to ask her how she expected to make it like this. She cut me off.
“Go home, Billy.”
I struggled for anything to say as she stepped past me and continued on her way. I only had one possibility that might chip away at whatever had covered her in this shell of indifference.
“What about Levent and Rabia?” I called.
She didn’t even slow down. I f
elt a hand on my arm and turned to see Dr. Zahn standing there. She cocked her head in the direction of Sunshine and Darla.
“C’mon, William, we have things to do.”
In the end, it was me, Dr. Zahn, Sunshine, Melissa and the baby, Thalia, Levent, Rabia, Cheryl, Katrina, and Darla who shouldered our packs and walked back to the gates of this new community. We couldn’t find another soul to come along. They were either strangers and wanted nothing to do with us, or they were packing their stuff to set off on their own quest for a new life.
I have no idea what to expect. I don’t know if we are walking into a trap. This could be the end of the line for us.
Somewhere along the way, Katrina’s hand found mine. Then, I felt something intertwine with my other hand. I looked down to discover Thalia. She gave me a tired smile. I can’t ever recall a child so young looking so completely weary.
A little girl Thalia’s age should not have bags under her eyes, I thought. As I looked around, I realized that I saw the same look on everybody else’s face as well.
We arrived at the wall and I stopped. The guards in the tower waved us forward and called for the “gate” to be opened. One by one, we entered the chute. I sent Thalia, Melissa and the baby first. At last it was down to just Katrina and me.
This was a huge leap of faith. Each person had stepped across that trench and into the chute. Each time, they had turned back to those of us still waiting. It was almost as if they were saying goodbye. The thing was, perhaps they were.
Katrina kissed me and walked into the chute when it was finally her turn. I stood there alone for a moment…a few zombies had finally shown up. Judging by their distance from me and how long it had taken between each person being admitted to the chute, I doubted they would get to me soon enough for me to have to do anything about it.
At last, the section of the barricade lowered. I glanced over my shoulder at the approaching undead and froze. One of them was Jake!