by Haley Walsh
He smiled. “No?”
“No. So I was rather pleased you asked me.”
“You’ve been pretty supportive of our GLBT youth.”
She glanced over the edge of her sunglasses at Joyce and Stephanie. She nodded toward them. “Some of my star pupils there. I never noticed they were together until they came to me about some…bullying issues. They said that you told them that I was one of the good teachers to go to.”
“I figured you’d be okay with it. You defended me and Keith when we had our problems.”
“I am. And I’m glad they felt safe to come to me. It’s what teaching is all about, don’t you think?” She glanced around at all the kids—some just gay-friendly, talking, chatting. It wasn’t as big a deal to this generation, something for which Skyler was grateful, but it didn’t mean they didn’t encounter problems from the outside. “It’s not only about drilling numbers into their heads,” Tricia went on, “because God knows most of them won’t get it anyway. I got into teaching to help those young souls. They have so many issues these days.”
“Yeah. I wish I had had a GSA when I was in high school.”
“And it wasn’t all that long ago, was it? Oh, I don’t mean that as a slight on your age—it’s a very good age to be, by the way. I wish I was that age again myself—but that it should already have been better for kids ten years ago.”
“They still come from the same kinds of homes with some of the same kinds of people teaching their classes and coaching their teams.”
“Thank God Carson and his ilk are gone. I don’t like to speak ill of the dead but I figure where he is, it won’t matter.”
Skyler took a deep breath. He still had flashbacks occasionally from the time he had been trapped by the former head coach, and shot. A car backfiring could put him right back there. If it hadn’t been for Keith…
He turned around to see what the man was doing. He was poking at the fire like the Boy Scout he was, watching over it. But he had shucked his pants and jacket, and was wearing a thin t-shirt and some conservative swim trunks. Darn. But Skyler knew that the pair he liked best on Keith was definitely not G-rated and there were children present.
Amber and Heather were sitting side by side on their respective towels. Amber was sluicing herself with sunscreen under her big floppy hat. Heather was still clad in her artfully torn jeans shorts and black t-shirt. As he watched them, Heather slyly looked over to where Drew was laying out his towel and she stood. She shimmied out of her shorts revealing a black bikini bottom. And then she peeled off her shirt.
Holy shit! Ms. Munson had been hiding a fairly grown-up physique under her Goth garb. She filled her bikini top nicely and Drew literally sat up when he noticed. Like watching a tennis game, Skyler’s gaze flicked from Heather to Drew. She did some additional needless stretching—subtle, girl—before she laid herself on her back onto her towel, with oblivious Amber Watson beside her.
“That was certainly a performance,” whispered Tricia.
Skyler caught her gaze and they suddenly burst into giggles.
Keith sauntered up to the kids, twirling a volleyball on one finger. “The fire has to die down a bit before we cook on it. Who’s up for a quick game?”
Evan, Lisa, and Kevin raised their hands. Rob and Vani, his boyfriend from another school, dusted the sand from their legs and came forward.
Keith divided them up. He took the side with Evan and Vani. Soon the rest were all watching the enthusiastic game. Keith even made a spectacular dive to hit the ball and the opposing team was so surprised he’d made it over the net they hadn’t reacted. Keith won his team the point.
Ben kept watch over the barbeque and Skyler got the hotdogs out of one of the coolers and set up the plates and snacks onto the most sand-free blanket.
Tricia got up to help. “Do you ever, uh, peel off some of those clothes?” she asked. “We are under the shade.”
“Oh. I guess I can lose the pants.”
When he shucked them Rick shielded his eyes dramatically. “The reflection! It’s like snow blindness!” he cried.
“Oh ha ha,” said Skyler. “I am not the tanning type.”
“No kidding, Mr. Foxe. You’re not a zombie, are you? The walking dead.”
“If I were, where would I get brains around here?”
Rick’s laughter flowed out over the gathering, and he held his stomach as he rolled back onto the sand. “That’s cold, Mr. Foxe!” He had removed his shirt first thing. His tawny skin probably tanned nicely.
Alex was fairly tanned, too, though he had more of a farmer’s tan, with a slightly lighter torso and dark arms and neck, testament to his football practice in the sunny fields of Redlands. He pushed at Rick with an enchanted look to his face. “Crazy Mexican,” he murmured.
The volleyball game ended prematurely when the smell of sizzling hot dogs on the grill caught everyone’s attention. The kids dived for the bags of chips, ignored the fruit Skyler brought, and hungrily eyed the grill.
Sodas and bottled waters were passed around, and soon everyone was stuffing their faces with hot dogs, chips, and Skyler’s homemade potato salad with bleu cheese and fresh green beans.
“This is good, Mr. Foxe,” said Drew, camping beside him. “It’s different. We never have anything like this at home.”
“Thank you, Drew. I like cooking, trying new recipes.”
“Mr. Foxe is a great cook,” said Keith, having his fourth hot dog. Not that Skyler was counting.
Drew wiped his mouth with a paper napkin and looked around to see if anyone was listening. The others seemed preoccupied with their food or their own conversations. He edged closer and kept his voice low. “So…do you do…gay stuff, Coach Fletcher?”
Keith choked and had to take several swallows of soda before he blinked at Drew. “What do you mean?” he coughed.
“You know,” said Drew, his hand making vague gestures. “Cook and decorate and stuff.”
Skyler put his hand on his hips indignantly, looked down at it, and then abruptly dropped his hands to his sides.
“Cooking isn’t gay, O’Connor,” said Keith. “Some people just have a flair for it. Like Mr. Foxe. I don’t have a flair for it.”
“Yeah. So that’s what I was wondering. I mean, I came to the GSA at first just to support Alex, you know? Then I thought once he got going there I’d leave. But…the people are chill. And I think they still need more straight kids hanging with them. At least so the rest of the school sees us there.”
“And that’s appreciated, Drew,” said Skyler.
The boy leaned back into the sand on his elbows and stared out toward the mesmerizing waves. The salty smell of the sea filled the air and the breeze ruffled his blond hair. Drew was a good-looking kid and a decent football player. He kept his body toned with football practice and weight-lifting. Little wonder that he had caught Heather’s eye.
“I mean,” Drew went on, “there’s people like my dad. He agreed with all those anti-gay people and he ranted hard when gay marriage became legal. He thinks that doing some things—like guys cooking—is gay.”
“What did he think about your coming today?”
He snorted. “He was not impressed. But my mom told me I could go. I had to swear to my dad that I wasn’t gay. Like, what difference would that make to my going to the beach?”
Skyler glanced at Keith. He was watching his football player carefully.
“It’s not easy going against the wishes of your parents,” said Skyler slowly. “I…I wasn’t out to my parents until quite recently.”
He hadn’t noticed Rob and Vani stopping by the blanket for more dogs. They sat below Skyler like neophytes at their master’s feet. The symbolism was not lost on him. “Why not?” asked Vani. He was a tall Indian boy, with strong features of cheekbones, dark heavy brows, and full lips.
“Well…” It looked like the others were suddenly perking up and began to gather around Skyler. The last thing he wanted to do was be their teacher of “all-t
hings-gay.” But he supposed it was what they wanted most; someone who had talked the talk and walked the walk.
“I just didn’t feel that I could. For a lot of my early years, I kind of felt…I don’t know. Ashamed of it.”
Heads nodded, looking up at him. They crunched their chips and tipped back soda cans.
“But then, as time went on, it just seemed like it was going to be too much drama to bring it up. I guess I was just putting it off, hoping, well. It wasn’t going to go away, but that it wouldn’t be an issue, it wouldn’t be something I’d have to sit down and tell my mom. But, of course, that’s stupid. I never even thought about when someone special came into my life.” His eyes flicked momentarily toward Keith. Keith smiled reassuringly.
Heads swiveled to stare at Keith and then came back toward Skyler.
“I mean, was I just going to pretend forever? That a man like that—” he gestured toward Keith— “didn’t matter to me? I’m glad she knows now. But it was tough, even at my age.”
“But we have nowhere else to go,” said Lisa. “You’re an adult. You don’t have to talk to your parents anymore if you don’t want to. We depend on them for food and shelter.”
“That’s very true. And I want you guys to know, that if there are any problems at home…any problems…you come to us teachers, okay? Even if you have to…leave home. There are alternatives.”
Lisa cocked her head and lowered her eyes.
“But even as an adult,” Skyler continued, “it’s still tough. Parents are a big part of our lives, no matter how old we are.”
“Me and my dad don’t get along,” said Drew. “But I don’t have to deal with shit—I mean stuff like you do. You guys…you’re brave.”
They all eyed each other.
Rob shrugged. He always looked put together, the perfect prep. “It’s not about bravery. It is what it is. We’re just gay. We have to deal with it all the time, not just at the GSA. It’s like…navigating a mine field sometimes. And sometimes it’s just…” He shrugged. “Normal, I guess.”
“Yeah,” said Evan, brushing back the long half of her dark hair. The other side of her head was shaved. She had a silver nose ring and a matching ring in her eyebrow. She was dressed almost the same as Heather had been before she shed it to put herself on display in her bikini. “For me, home is okay. It’s everywhere else that sucks.”
Skyler nodded. “I had a good friend who stuck by me from when I was a kid to my adulthood. That helped. That’s what the GSA is for.”
“What about you, Coach Fletcher?” asked Alex, lowering himself next to Drew. “Were you out to your parents?”
Keith was working on hot dog number five. He wiped the mustard from the side of his mouth with a napkin. “Yeah. When I turned eighteen. Neither of them had a clue. My mom was right with it, my dad not so much. But she turned him around.”
“But you’re not…” Drew made those vague hand gestures again. “I mean you can’t tell, you know?” He looked around. “Hey, I don’t mean to offend anyone. It’s just that sometimes you can tell right away if a guy or a girl is gay. Like Mr. Foxe.”
Skyler deflated. And here he thought he had been fooling people all those years. Thanks, Drew.
“Gay people come in all shapes and sizes,” said Keith. “In a range of…what would you call it?” he asked Skyler. “A range of styles and temperaments.”
“Look at Stephanie and Joyce…and Evan,” said Lisa. “Girls, too, you know. Some are butch, some are femme.”
Skyler nodded. Not that he knew too much about lesbians. “And everything in between.”
“It seems complicated,” Tricia blurted, and then immediately hid behind her soda can.
“Not really,” said Rick.
Skyler turned toward the teen. He was curious as to what he had to say.
“I mean, you’re just attracted to…what you’re attracted to. Or who. Like this Big Guy.” He thumbed back toward an obviously embarrassed Alex. “I had my eye on him for a while. Just looking, you know? I never dreamed he was gay.”
Alex said nothing. Just squirmed and hunched forward over his knees.
“And I’m bisexual,” said Lisa. “To me, it totally depends on the person, not their gender.”
They all shared a little more with one another, before Alex got to his feet. By his body language it looked as if he’d had enough. “Are we gonna swim or not?” he said.
Rob and Vani looked at each other and quickly shed their shirts, running toward the ocean along with Alex. Heather got up and looked at Drew. “You coming, O’Connor?”
Skyler noticed his eyes travel up and down Heather’s novel state of undress and he scrambled to his feet. “Yeah, okay. Coming, Amber?”
“No thanks. I’m just going to lie here and read my book.”
Skyler watched the kids hurl toward the water with deep satisfaction. His first field trip, of sorts, and it seemed to be going well. They splashed in the water, while some of the boys dived in, body surfing. He waved toward Keith. “Watch them. Make sure there aren’t any riptides.”
“I’m keeping an eye, Mother, don’t worry.”
“You guys are really good together,” sighed Amber. Ah, was she finally giving up on her Skyler crush, he wondered.
“Thanks,” he said shyly. He didn’t want to elaborate. Had to remember that these were his students and he didn’t have to share all of his personal life, even though a lot of it was already laid out there.
She lowered her book and looked out to the water, shielding her eyes with her hand. “Looks like I’ll be flying solo for a while. Heather has been trying to get Drew’s attention for a long time.”
“And all it took was a bikini.”
She snapped her head toward him, her red hair whipping around her face. “Mr. Foxe!” she cried, scandalized. But she was wearing a big smile.
“I thought Drew had a girlfriend.”
“He had a friend he took to the dance, but I don’t think she was a ‘girlfriend’.”
“I see.”
“I think the GSA is really good for everyone. And my parents are like Drew’s dad. They didn’t want me to join and definitely didn’t want me to go on this trip. Thought it would turn me gay. And they are very intelligent people.”
“It just goes to show, Amber, that old prejudices die hard.”
“I know. But my parents should have known better.”
“How did you convince them to let you come?”
“I presented facts,” she said with finality. Apparently, he was not to know the details.
Tricia shook her head and sighed. Skyler looked her over, from her thin frame to her sharp nose with its large-lensed sunglasses. She was wearing a Hawaiian print suit, the kind with a little peplum skirt. “How about you, Tricia…I mean, Ms. Hornbeck?”
“Oh, I’m not gay.”
He was taken aback for only a moment and caught the tail end of a smirk pulling up one side of her mouth as she stared out toward the ocean.
“I didn’t mean that…” Skyler began.
“I know. I’m just yanking your chain.”
Amber giggled.
“Do you mean what’s my story?” she asked. “Why am I supporting your kids?”
“They’re our kids.” And he never thought to say that to a woman.
“Well…my brother was gay.”
Skyler caught the past tense. “Was?”
“Yes. He died some years ago. I knew he was gay. But our parents never knew. So much of his life was just invisible to them. Such a waste.”
“Do you mind if I ask…?”
“They said it was an accident. But I think it was suicide,” she said softly.
Amber gasped. She was sitting on her crossed legs, her hand to her mouth.
Tricia was still staring straight ahead, but Skyler automatically laid a hand gently on her arm.
“We’ll never know, of course,” she went on. Her chin was raised stoically. “And my parents still don’t know about him. Bu
t I won’t forget it. And I simply will not let any students under my care feel so lost that they have to resort to that. I just won’t.”
Skyler’s hand slid down to hers and squeezed it. “No we won’t.”
They said nothing, and after a time, Skyler released her and looked out to the ocean too, contemplating its vastness, its deep blue hue.
Amber said nothing, and the three of them simply sat in one another’s company.
§ § §
The rest of the day was fairly relaxing. The kids swam for several hours and then came back wet and sandy to their towels. Someone brought external speakers for their phone and played some tunes that some danced to, while the others sang, some socked the volleyball around, and then Kevin noticed that there was an ice cream place just up the road. There was no stopping their appetites and so Keith and Ben volunteered to take the kids en masse.
Skyler watched them go over his shoulder. This was turning out to be a somewhat expensive weekend, but the teachers had decided to split the bill between them, so a four-way split wasn’t so bad.
They all came back, licking ice cream cones and Keith even brought a pistachio cone for Skyler and a chocolate chip cone for Tricia. “Thanks!” he said and dug in.
Kevin and Lisa crashed on their respective towels and leaned toward Skyler. “Some surfer dude,” said Kevin excitedly, “called Rob a fag and we all confronted him.”
Skyler’s heart lurched and he lowered his cone. Visions of his explaining to angry parents why their kids got into a fight under his watch danced in his head. “What happened?”
“It was sick!” chimed in Lisa. “No one got in his face and swore. We all just said that, yeah, we’re all gay. And we’re all just getting ice cream like anyone else. And the guy didn’t know what to do.”
Kevin bobbed his black-dyed hair. “I thought he was going to say something else rude. I was totally waiting for it, until Coach asked him if he wanted to join us, even offered to buy him an ice cream.”
Skyler’s jaw flopped open. “And did he? Did he join you?”
“He totally did!” gasped Lisa. “He even sat with us for a while and talked, and then we headed back. He was cool by the time we left.”