Secrets from Myself

by Christine Hart

  “Yes, she’s fine.”

  Mom hugs me.

  “All right. Let’s get home and pack,” says Mom.

  I think briefly of our narrow old house back in Nelson. And then I remember our date with the Mann family.

  Chapter 30

  Patty’s house is immaculate when Mom and I walk through the door. A spread of fruit, cheese, crackers, vegetables, and several pitchers of juice has been arranged thoughtfully on her tiny table and kitchen counter. Her nicest glass tumblers and stacks of napkins and small white plates are waiting for us as well. A few padded folding chairs have been added to the living room. I recognize them from Patty’s back hall as having been stashed in her spare room.

  The scene warms my heart and makes me angry at the same time. Patty has tried her best to be hospitable and I can perfectly picture the sneer on Professor Mann’s face when he walks in. I won’t say a word to Patty, though.

  “Patty, you’ve been busy!” says Mom. She smiles broadly while combing her hands through her auburn curls. She doesn’t know Professor Mann very well, either.

  “Best foot forward, right? I know our family meeting is going to go well, but it doesn’t hurt to set the stage,” says Patty.

  I smile as enthusiastically as I can, but no words of false hope come to mind. A rapping on the glass panel of Patty’s screen door halts my train of thought.

  Behind Mom and me stands the entire Mann family: the Professor and Radhika with Bryce and Mitchell behind them. I hadn’t noticed that Mitchell is nearly as tall as his father. I must have overestimated Professor Mann’s height. Radhika’s ironed hair and perfectly drawn maroon lips complement her silky cream blouse. Profes-sor Mann is wearing a crisp pale blue collared shirt and dark denim — very informal for him.

  “Good afternoon! Welcome! Please come in,” says Patty as she steps around Mom and opens her outer door.

  “Hello. Thank you so much for having us,” says Radhika. Professor Mann remains silent.

  “Hey,” says Bryce to me. He smiles and it’s like a rush of cool water relieving a sunburn. Maybe the worst is over and everything is all right.

  “Radhika, it’s so lovely to see you. And you too, Bryce.” Mom extends her smile to Professor Mann and Mitchell as well.

  “Ladies, I’m going to excuse myself,” says Professor Mann, addressing Mom and Patty, getting blank stares in return. “But not before I apologize to Katelyn.” I am struck dumb by the idea.

  “My tone and conduct last week were not appro-priate. I’ve since discussed this matter with my wife and son. I see no reason why the children can’t maintain their friendship through emails or other correspondence. But I can’t condone what my wife is about to disclose. I want no part of it. I’ll wait in the car.”

  “I’m coming with you, Dad,” says Mitchell. This is just as well as far as I’m concerned, although now the clock is ticking on our visit. Professor Mann won’t want to wait very long.

  “Oh, uh, sure. That’s …” Patty is still processing, look-ing at her lovely snack arrangement.

  “Let’s have a seat,” says Mom, gesturing towards Patty’s sofa. Radhika and Bryce sit down. Mom and I sit in the folding chairs facing them on the other side of the coffee table.

  “Where to start?” says Radhika. She opens her clutch and scoops her hand inside. My heart lurches. A gold oval locket! The metal has a pattern etched on the front. It could be Akasha’s!

  “Bryce confided in me about some of what Katelyn’s been going through the last few months. I wasn’t entirely surprised; I hope you won’t take that the wrong way. My dear, you have always been a sensitive little soul.” Radhika smiles warmly at me, and then looks to my mom.

  “I thought I was assisting Katelyn with a summer school project, helping her do some research on the Komagata Maru. Because my great-grandfather was on that boat, I turned up what I could find to help her out.”

  As Radhika speaks, my heart is pounding in my ears. I look at Bryce. He’s blushing, but not from looking at me. He looks embarrassed by what his mother is saying.

  “I got interested again myself, so I continued looking through everything my mother saved from her father’s journey to Canada. Among my family photos and letters, I found this locket. Bryce told me Katelyn had been looking for a locket because she believes another girl’s spirit is looking for it. I can’t say what this means, but I’ve always wondered why my grandfather kept a locket with his photo … and a girl who isn’t my grandmother.” Radhika opens the locket and passes it to Mom.

  “I don’t know what to say.” Mom examines the photos in the locket. My chest is so tight I can barely breathe as she passes it to me.

  “It’s them!” I blurt, before clamping my hand over my mouth. I look around the room at every face staring at me. I look back at the locket. I haven’t seen Akasha or Sanjay’s faces anywhere but my dreams.

  A closer look at Sanjay sends a flash of pins and needles through my limbs. The wheels in my head all lock into place at that moment. Akasha doesn’t want justice or her locket. She wants Bryce. She wants Sanjay back!

  “Can I see that?” Patty reaches towards the locket and instinctively I pass it to her.

  “Careful though, it’s a family heirloom,” says Radhika. Bryce is looking even more humiliated. Patty examines the open locket, but quickly returns it to Radhika, who closes it and pops it back in her clutch.

  “Sorry, I know this is weird,” I say to Bryce. “Wait, there’s something else!” I run to my makeshift bedroom and fish my drawings out of my backpack.

  “They’re not great, but they’re as close as I could get without having her model for me.” I pass the drawings to Radhika, who examines them with interest. “Here’s the locket too.” I pass the last sketch over.

  “Can this possibly get more bizarre?” says Bryce. He scratches his carefully gelled messy bangs.

  “Have some fruit, hon. There’s juice too,” says Patty. She rises to start a plate for him, still a caregiver at heart.

  “Are you able to scan these for me? Or make some photocopies? Bryce can give you our mailing address,” says Radhika.

  “I’d love to do that. This is weird. I spent half the summer shut in a group home just for talking about this. Now it’s … real,” I say, unable to conceal my disbelief. I know this turn will bother Mom.

  “Sweetie, that’s not why we had you there,” says Mom. I wonder who the “we” is in her mind. She shoves her hand back into her curls and leaves it there for a moment while she thinks.

  “You thought there was something wrong. I know that. It’s okay,” I say flatly.

  “As much as I’d like to explore this strange connection a little more, we do need to get going.” Radhika rises and Bryce sets his plate of fruit on the counter.

  “We’ll keep in touch. I promise. Dad’s not going to freak out again, and if he does, Mom’s got my back,” says Bryce.

  Radhika opens the front door with her smooth, graceful arm. Bryce is following her, but pauses to look at me. I take a chance and grab him for a hug. I have to reach up now that he’s nearly a foot taller than me. And it’s goofy having our mothers watching us, but I won’t see him for who knows how long. Professor Mann certainly won’t be bringing him back to the Kootenays for visits.

  “I miss you already. But I’m glad we’re going to stay friends,” I say, still hanging on. Bryce is hugging back, which I know is awkward for him.

  “Don’t worry. It’s all good,” says Bryce. A hint of a crack in his voice tugs at my heart. He pulls away and I let go.

  “Thank you again for having us,” says Radhika. She smiles and starts off down Patty’s front steps.

  Bryce follows, but when he reaches the sidewalk, he turns back to wave. He grins and his brown eyes light up. I wave back and I watch as the Manns’ black suv pulls away from the curb and speeds off down the street.
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  Chapter 31

  The air smells like burnt leaves for the first time this fall as I walk home from school. Wind pulls at a few loose strands at the top of my braid; I’ve started wear-ing my hair just like Akasha did. My denim jacket is not quite warm enough today. The weather has turned for the year.

  I round the corner on to my street thinking about how satisfying it feels to step on a perfectly crisp dry leaf and watch it crumble to pieces under my foot. It’s almost as good as popping bubble wrap.

  I turn up the concrete path to my front stairs and see a small manila parcel on the welcome mat at the center of our veranda. I smile knowing that in Nelson, even a downtown adjacent street like mine is safe enough to leave a parcel on the step — unlike my summer accommodation in Vancouver.

  The parcel has writing in black felt marker. As soon as I see my name, I recognize Bryce’s handwriting. I sit down on the porch swing and work my fingernail into the corner of the parcel, prying up the seal. The fact that Bryce has remembered my birthday is reason enough to celebrate. Whatever he’s put in this parcel is incidental.

  Inside layers of tissue paper are taped frustratingly tight. I tear and tear shredding the tissue until I get to the lump at the heart of the package. There is a piece of paper taped around the outside of the small card-board box. A letter, no doubt.

  I carefully peel up one corner of the tape to free the piece of paper. It’s an envelope. I’ve always been the kind of kid to open the present before the card — unless Mom is standing over my shoulder to make me follow etiquette. Today I’m alone, so the box comes first, no contest. I work the cardboard lid up off the bottom of the box and reveal a brassy-gold egg-shaped pendant on a patina-stained chain. Is this what I think it is?

  I pick up the pendant and, sure enough, there is a small, flat disk in the middle that I can push out on a hinge to reveal two photos. Akasha and Sanjay, right where I left them in Vancouver. I may never get further proof that Akasha is part of my cosmic past, but I know it in my heart and that’s what matters to me.

  Now I need to read the letter. If he’s giving me Akasha’s locket, Radhika consented. This letter better tell me why.

  Vancouver, October 22nd

  Hey Katelyn,

  I wanted this to be a surprise. I hope you’re reading this with a smile on your face. Mom sat on the fence for a while before I finally convinced her that this locket is really yours. She believed me, but she just didn’t want to part with it. She’s all gushy talking about us being destined to meet and … well, she’s a romantic at heart.

  Anyway, I promised her you’ll take care of it. Wear it if you want to, but I hope you’ll think of me whenever you look at it. Mom says I look just like my great-great-grandfather. It’s hard to say for sure with an old photo and such an old-fashioned look.

  I’m still hoping to come back to Nelson with Mom in the spring. I know it’s a long time. I guess we’re lucky we’ve got email and Skype. Text me when you get this so we can do a call.

  Love,

  Bryce

  I don’t waste a moment before fastening the clasp at the back of my neck. The tiny click feels like that triumphant moment when you fit in the last piece in a very large and complicated puzzle.

  Historical Background

  The story of Katelyn Medena and her connection to a girl named Akasha from early twentieth-century India is completely fictional. The context of the story, however, has roots in actual historical events.

  On May 23, 1914, the steamship SS Komagata Maru arrived in Vancouver and attempted to dock in Coal Harbour. Of the 376 passengers seeking entry into Canada, only twenty-four were admitted. The 352 weary passengers forced to return to India faced military action from the British when they arrived in Kolkata, then Calcutta. In the chaos and violence that followed, nineteen people were killed, while most of the rest were arrested and faced years of imprisonment.

  There are a few key points in Secrets from Myself that are worth noting with reference to the historical Komagata Maru incident.

  Katelyn has very little information when she begins her research into Akasha’s life and times. Through a diary entry from Akasha, Katelyn’s first piece of “evidence” is that the girl’s point of origin was the Indian province of Punjab. Katelyn later learns that the ship Akasha came to Canada on was called the Komagata Maru, a name many readers might recognize as Japanese. The official point of departure for the ship’s 1914 trip to Vancouver was Hong Kong.

  The discrepancy between the potential immigrants’ citizenship and their point of departure for Canada was the grounds used for barring their entry. The law, known as the continuous journey regulation, was enacted in 1908. While conducting historical research at Vancouver’s Central Library, Katelyn also learns that while most passengers on the Komagata Maru were from the Sikh faith, there were also Hindu and Muslim people on board. At the time, Canada was more welcoming to Christian Europeans, hence the exclusionary and unjust continuous journey regulation.

  Katelyn’s geographic search for Akasha in Vancouver initially takes her to Crab Park, east of Gastown. As mentioned above, the Komagata Maru was held in Coal Harbour, which was and is located to the west of Crab Park, separated by iconic Canada Place. Because Katelyn has so little information, she simply gravitates towards the bright orange cranes operating at today’s Port of Vancouver.

  On May 23, 2008, the BC Legislative Assembly unanimously passed a resolution apologizing for the Komagata Maru incident.

  On August 3, 2008, Prime Minister Stephen Harper apologized for the Komagata Maru incident at the thirteenth annual Ghadri Babiyan Da Mela festival in Surrey, BC.

  On May 18, 2016, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau formally apologized in the House of Commons for the injustice and suffering resulting from Canadian laws and officials’ actions during the Komagata Maru incident.

  Historical Background

  Acknowledgements

  Thanks to my mom for being my first and most trusted beta reader. And thanks to my sister Sarah for letting me quiz her on plot ideas while she’s wearing her teacher’s hat.

  Many of the historical references would not have been possible without the detailed records on the Simon Fraser University Library’s website, Komagata Maru: Continuing the Journey, which can be found at komagatamaru journey.ca.

  Last, but not least, extra special thanks to my friend Nivrita for helping me include a bit of Hindi text in the story.

  About the Author

  Christine Hart has an undergraduate degree in writing in literature, and has worked in corporate communications and design. She has written many books for middle grade, young adult, and new adult audiences, includ-ing Watching July (a Moonbeam Awards Gold Medal recipient and a Westchester Fiction Awards winner); Best Laid Plans; Stalked; and the Variant Conspiracy series.