“I know the studio would pay for it while you are here. You wouldn’t have to find a person to sublet it or anything like that. But, I can see you need some time to think it over,” she runs her fingers over her lips before folding them tightly in her lap. “How about I give you a tour?” She stands up abruptly before I have a chance to say anything and I nod slowly, pushing myself up from the couch too.
“Sure, why not?” I run my hand through my hair and look down at the bottle of champagne I dropped a couple notes on before I showed up here. I thought this was going to unfold a lot differently than it is right now. I mean, I don’t know how smart it is to take a job where I live with a woman that I want to strip down and fuck on every surface in this place. Sounds like a recipe for disaster to me, and I’m not a guy that likes drama. At all. Yet, I can’t deny the idea of seeing her every day, of being around her, getting to know her like no one else can, it makes a powerful argument to take the job.
“Okay, so that was the living room, this is the dining room and kitchen. Out the sliding door there is the patio and pool,” she points to the glistening water visible through the double glass doors leading out to her deck.
“Where would I be sleeping?” I interrupt. “Would I have my own room? Or do you need some extra protection at night, cause I think I could have that covered,” my voice is a low rumble that seems to vibrate over her skin and down her spine. Vanessa’s pale skin glows pink as her mouth opens a little and her teeth bite into her full, kissable lip.
She clears her throat, “You would have your own room, of course,” she runs her hands down over her clothes like there’s a stubborn wrinkle in her dress that she is desperate to remove.
“Of course,” I smile, I love seeing her all worked up and flustered. It’s endearing in a town so full of soulless women, to meet someone so stunning on the outside and so sincere on the inside. “I’m just messing with ya, besides I don’t think you could handle me sleeping in your bed sweetheart. I’d destroy you.”
“I, um, okay, so this is my home gym.” She tries to brush off my comment but I can see it marinating in her mind and making her body involuntarily react as her nipples pebble under her sundress. “There’s not much to it, just an elliptical and some weights, but you’d be free to use it, if you wanted to,” she continues on down the hall, brushing me off.
“No thanks,” I glance inside at the equipment. “I like to run outside with Axle,” I follow her as she keeps showing me around.
“Axle? Oh, is that your dog’s name? That’s cute,” she stops and looks over her shoulder at me and it’s almost too much. I can easily picture her looking over her shoulder at me like that while I fuck her tight little pussy from behind.
“He’s not ‘cute,’ he’s a military trained dog.”
“Wow, is he friendly?”
“As friendly as anyone who’s been blown up in a war,” I quip.
Vanessa’s eyes travel my face over to my scars and she looks like she wants to ask about them, but thinks better of it and turns back around. “So there’s not much left, there is the main bathroom here,” she points inside the large, pristine room, clad in white tile. “That’s my room down there,” she points to the end of the hall and you’d be here.” We stop in front of the open door and I softly brush past her, pressing into her warm, soft body as I step inside.
Did I just hear her suppress a breathy sigh? Or am I imagining things? I look back at her and she composes herself quickly, following me into what could be my new quarters for the next few months.
“It’s nice,” I look around the spacious bedroom. It has a closet much bigger than I’d ever need and comes fully furnished with a big bed, although the fluffy pillows and comforter would have to go. There’s a wall-mounted TV hanging from the opposite wall and a French door that leads outside to another patio. “You know, I’ve gotta ask,” I let my gaze slowly lick her body from her toes up, “you really don’t seem like the kind of girl who would go to a sex club. What was it you were looking for there?” I step toward her and she doesn’t move. I can see her pulse vibrating in her neck as she takes a deep breath and flutters her eyelids.
“What was I looking for?” Her voice is breathy and I can smell her natural perfume. It intoxicates me and it takes every ounce of self-restraint I have in my body not to grab her and toss her down on this bed only steps away from us.
“Yeah.”
“I was looking for you,” she answers.
“Well, you’ve got me here,” I growl as the urgency to rip off her clothes overcomes me. “Now the question is, what do you want now?”
10|Vanessa
In the time, it takes me to blink once, a hundred scenarios run through my head. In almost all of them I’m naked. Pure need aches inside my core as a shiver of lust licks my spine. The way Gabe is standing over me, his hulking frame eclipsing mine, his muscles almost as rigid and vein-streaked as his cock was last night. I’ve never felt this pooling heat in my belly before that seems to be spreading out, down from my belly button to my pussy. I want to give in to him. I want to feel a real man spread me open, fill me until I can’t take another inch and make me cum. I want to scream his name as my face contorts in pleasure like the woman I saw last night at the club. But I know it won’t happen.
It never has, and I’m not sure it ever will. My cheeks blaze again, but this time with embarrassment, as I wonder for probably the billionth time, if I’m some kind of freak or if I’m broken. Why can’t I even bring myself to climax? What is wrong with me? The last thing I need is to expose that secret to him. Sure, this is the first time I’ve ever felt such a primal desire for anyone, but I don’t think it would change whatever is fucked up inside of me.
“I mean, I was looking for someone like you and someone like the women I saw and just, I was looking to understand the whole scene,” I step back from Gabe, and break the spell we’ve both been under. The intolerable tension between us seems to shatter, like a rock being thrown through a window in a hot car, I feel like I can finally take a lungful of air as my woozy head settles and my wits return to me.
“Why?” He doesn’t step forward, instead the intense stare he just held me under follows me as I make more room between us.
“It’s for the movie,” I answer, pretending that there’s something out on the patio worth looking at. Anything to avoid the powerful, almost hypnotic state I feel when I look at him. “I’m playing a woman who is a nymphomaniac. She’s big into the sex club scene and it’s not a world I know anything about. I wanted to go see if I could understand the draw and maybe learn a bit about it so I can play her character convincingly,” I tell half the truth. Obviously, I’m leaving out the part about my own sexuality. How it’s stifled and I’m desperate to unlock it. How I hope that I can discover what’s holding me back through this role. How I don’t want to keep living a life where I hear so much about the amazing experiences people have with sex, like I am some kind of alien that can never truly understand.
“Interesting, so it’s all just for research then?” I don’t look back at him. I refuse to meet his eyes, knowing damned well that if I do, he will see right through me.
“That’s right,” I answer flatly. “You know, you’re right about me not being the kind of girl that goes to places like that,” I finally whirl around to face him, “but you looked like you fit right in there.” I feel a tinge of anger swirl inside me as it occurs to me exactly how comfortable he did look last night. Like he’s been going for years. Jealousy nips at my insides, how many women has he met there? How many has he fucked? I know it doesn’t make sense for me to care, but I do. I almost feel some strange sense of betrayal at the idea of him sliding his cock into some strange woman out on the dance floor. I can see it in my mind, and I hate it.
Gabe shrugs nonchalantly, “I’m not a stranger there, that’s for sure.”
“Well, if you do take this job, you can’t be bringing women back here. You’ve gotta keep that part of your life separate from wo
rking here,” I suddenly snap, the words dripping from my tongue like bile.
“Oh really?” His eyebrows shoot up and his eyes twinkle with amusement as he walks across the room to me.
“Really,” I reply, trying to sound less like a jilted lover and more like a professional.
“And what exactly are you going to offer me to compensate for those lost nights?” He presses his body into mine and I step backward, bumping into the wall. My heart is racing and my knees might not hold me up. Passion floods through me, making me feel braver and saucier than I’d ever be normally.
“Oh, I don’t know,” I look up at him from under my eyelashes, “what do you suggest?” The twinkle in his eye dissolves into something entirely different. It goes from an amused glint to a flash of hungry need.
“I can teach you everything you need to know for your movie, sweetheart,” he pins me to the wall with his hips and drags his thumb slowly over my jaw. I open my mouth, aching to suck on that thumb. Flames flicker inside me as my blood boils for him. I want more than just his thumb in my mouth, but that’s where I want to start.
“What do you think you can teach me?” I encourage him, pushing my hips slightly back against him, I can feel his erection forming as he grinds against me.
“I can teach you how to fuck, how to feel, how to be free,” he murmurs, his mouth hovering over mine. I can feel his breath billow over my skin and I close my eyes, ready to feel his lips on mine. That’s exactly what I want to learn. That’s exactly what I need.
Suddenly Fiona’s ringtone cuts through the tiny space between us like a knife. Gabe and I both jolt at the unexpected noise and I stand up straight as he moves back from me, his eyes never leaving my face.
“I need to take this,” my voice is hoarse.
Gabe nods curtly and strides across the room as I inwardly groan at the timing and answer my phone.
“Hello?”
11|Vanessa
“Hey babe, I’ve got some news. Some of it is fucking awful and some is fucking amazing, how do you want it?” My agent, the straight shooter, cuts right to the chase.
“Bad news first,” I plug the ear I don’t have pressed into the phone and walk out of the room into the hall like I’m trying to hear her over a concert or something. The house is pin-drop quiet, it’s, the sexual tension I can’t seem to hear her over. Even though it’s silent, it makes my blood rush in my ears like an ocean breaking waves.
“Your co-star quit. He couldn’t get the salary he was demanding and it all fell through,” I can hear her breathe out smoke into the air as she talks.
I stop pacing the hall floor and almost laugh. “That’s, the awful news? Dramatic much? That’s not the end of the world, they will replace him,” I shake my head at Fiona’s theatrics.
“No, Vanessa, you didn’t let me finish. They did replace him already. They’ve got it all figured out, but, babe, are you sitting down?”
“No,” I pinch my fingers onto my nose between my eyes and wait for the big announcement, “just tell me.”
“Your new co-star is Erik,” her words hit my heart like a rock and then that rock seems to slowly sink inside of me until it settles in my gut.
“No,” I spit out the word like it’s burning my mouth.
“Yes, I’m sorry honey. I know you two had a bad break up, but the studio is loving this. They’ve already made a big announcement and everything. And someone supposedly leaked the whole romance that you two had so the buzz is already building about you guys working together.
“No, no, no,” I feel like if I say it enough this will stop. Fiona’s words, will stop and just like Dorothy repeating how “there’s no place like home,” I will wake up in my bed and this will all be a dream.
“It’s true. I’m sorry hun.” She sounds like a dragon breathing fire as she smokes on her end of the phone. I lean my head against the wall and whimper. “But I hate that douchebag. How am I supposed to pretend to love someone who makes me want to stab them in the face? This is so fucking stupid,” I hit my forehead against the wall.
“I don’t know, isn’t, all acting just make believe? Do that.” She answers plainly. From anyone else I’d think they were being a snarky bitch, but with Fiona I know her bluntness is just her nature. She’s right, of course, it shouldn’t matter that he used me like a prop for months, taking me to all the Hollywood parties and telling me he could really see a future together only to cheat on me and break up with me via text right before the Oscars because I was “too chunky to be Oscar red carpet material.”
The fucking prick.
“What is the good news?” I flatten my face into the wall, hoping that she’s going to tell me her good news is she’s fucking with me and this is all a lie.
“Just a sec,” I can hear her phone jostling around and the wind whoosh over it as she yells in the background, “Where did you learn to drive, you fuckwad? Get the fuck outta here!” She screams. “Sorry about that,” her voice is suddenly crystal clear and calm again, like she wasn’t just another raving lunatic on the LA. freeway two seconds ago.
“Fiona, you really need to get a handsfree set. Like, seriously,” I groan. “One of these days you’re gonna kill someone.”
“Not because of talking on the phone, that’s for sure,” she argues, “but if they can’t learn to drive,” I can hear her teeth gritting, “then I just might.”
“Fiona,” I sigh, but I give up before I say another word. I know she won’t listen anyway. “What’s the good news?”
“Right, right, right. The good news is you thought this movie might propel your career and you’re right. Since that whole supposed leak and the co-star thing all the rags are picking up the story. Entertainment Tonight wants to do an interview with you and Erik, TMZ is covering the replacement. It’s all everyone seems to be talking about. I’m telling you, Vanessa, this is going to put your name on Hollywood Boulevard!”
But at what cost? I can’t help but feel like I’m selling my soul a little if making my career means working with a man who treated me like garbage and made me feel bad about myself. I try to push the thoughts, the anger I still have for him, all aside, and focus on the good, but I’m failing. This role was supposed to be for me. It was supposed to help me understand myself and possibly help me explore the part of my sexuality that I still have never uncovered. Now, it’s going to be all about Erik fucking Fisher. The guy who could never even come close to making me cum. The guy who told me I was too fat to be sexy. So much for this role helping me in my personal life. Now it’s just going to be a job. A job I dread.
“Ok that’s great,” I answer her cheerlessly.
“You don’t sound happy about it,” she pouts.
“No, I am. For sure,” I lie. “I’ve just gotta go, I’m heading out for yoga and don’t want to be late. Love you babe,” I chirp, hanging up before she has a chance to protest.
I drop my hand that’s wrapped around my phone to my side, dangling like a dead fish on a line. Pushing myself up from the wall, I take a deep breath, trying to bury the anger and disappointment back down inside, but it keeps splashing up the back of my throat like stomach acid, tainting my tongue with its foul taste.
Fuck that guy!
I whirl around and head back down into the guest room where Gabe is messing around with the television on the wall and he looks up at me with surprise.
“Listen,” I feel my stomach tighten into knots as the bad news about Erik overshadows my life. “I need to know if you want this job or not because I don’t have time for games and if you don’t want it, I need to find someone else,” I snap.
“Woah, good phone call?” He crosses his arms zeroing in on the source of my anger precisely.
“It doesn’t matter. Do you want the job or not?” I put my hands on my hips and face off with him defiantly.
“Sure, I’ll take the job,” he answers slowly, “on one condition,” I can see a spark behind his eyes.
“What’s that?” I answer crisply.
“I’ll take the job and I won’t even argue with your thing about bringing women over as long as you agree that I’m going to do things my way and if I’m going to protect you, you’re gonna play by my rules,” the way he says it sends a shiver down my spine. It isn’t hard to imagine being punished, laid out across his lap with a bare red bottom, for disobeying whatever these mystery rules are. Honestly, it sounds enticing.
“Deal.”
12|Gabe
“What do you think, Axle? You think you got enough stuff?” I laugh as even he seems to notice how much bigger the bag I packed for him is than the one I’ve got my stuff in. His dark brown eyes look up at me and he pants, making it look like a big doggy grin. “Yeah, I think we’re just about set here too,” I agree with him like he’s actually talking to me. Like I don’t just carry on a long, rambling and one-sided conversation with my dog all the time. People probably think I’m crazy as I walk down the streets of LA. chatting with him, but I don’t care. He’s great company and he understands me, which is more than I can say for most people I’ve met in this city.
Except for her.
Vanessa’s face swirls in across my eyes in a blurry vision. This girl has got me feeling a way I told myself I never would again. A way I never thought I could. Her plump lips are so juicy and pink, I want to kiss them, bite them, and watch them as my cock slides between them. That part isn’t so different from other girls, the thing that’s different is, I also want to listen to the words that come out of them, and I want to make them smile.
I look down at the duffle bag overflowing with Axle’s stuff. A dog bed made of memory foam is shoved inside at the bottom and his toys, bones and leash are stuffed in on top. Compared to my bag of mostly toiletries and a few clothes, it’s not hard to see who the priority is in this house.
My stomach growls at me and Axle tilts his head, listening intently. “I’ve gotta get some food soon,” I nod down at my belly. I would normally go downstairs and make something, but I just got rid of all the perishable food from the kitchen. I guess I could open a can of soup, but after cleaning everything up, I’d rather just grab a burger on the road.
Shared by the Firefighters: An MFM Firefighter Novella Page 14