“I hate heights.”
“LOL. It’s okay. I’ll hold your hand…”
“Deal,” Callie typed, even if jumping was something she didn’t think she could ever do.
“Off the wall question.”
“Shoot.”
“What’s your favorite part of your body?”
Callie snorted. Not her ass, that was for sure. “Oh, I don’t know. Um, my nose?”
“Yeah, you have a cute nose.”
“It’s rather neglected in all of the e-mail I get.”
“LOL. Well, I like it,” Brian wrote.
“What’s your favorite body part?” Callie wondered. He could probably list them all as favorites as far as she was concerned. They all seemed pretty good to her.
“My ears.”
Callie laughed, yeah they were cute too. There wasn’t much about Brian that wasn’t cute.
“Hey, sweet pea, look at the time.”
Oh, hell, Callie groaned, squinting at the time on her computer. It was pushing midnight and she had to be up for work at six. “It’s late. I’m sorry. I hope I didn’t keep you.”
“Nothing could keep me from you, Callie, but you need your rest for work tomorrow. So I have a question for you.”
Will I boink you on our cyber interaction alone? Yep. Do I want to run my tongue over every ridge in your abdomen? Yep. Callie thought those things, but instead typed, “What’s that?”
“I’d like to call you, would you like that?”
Speak to Brian? On the phone?
No, via the beat of the tom-tom, idiot.
Yippee skippee!!
Wait, what if he heard her voice and it ruined everything? What if he talked to the real Callie and found out she was just a yawn? What if, what if…
“I’d like that a lot, Brian.” Because, well, hell yeah, she’d like that a lot.
“Great. How about tomorrow night, same time as tonight?’
Same bat channel… ”I’ll be here.” Callie gave him her cell phone number.
“I’ll talk to you tomorrow then. Night, sweet pea.”
Oh, she just couldn’t catch her breath when he called her that! “G’night, Brian. Sleep well.”
“You too. I’ll be thinking of you.”
“Me too, Brian. Night.”
Callie jumped up and headed straight for the bathroom. She’d had to use it since ten ‘o clock, but Brian’s words had kept her glued to her office chair.
He was going to call. Now she’d never sleep for the excitement of it.
Soon enough she’d hear Brian’s voice, and Callie found herself counting the hours until eight tomorrow night on her painted toes and fingers.
Chapter 8
“Hey, Callie. How’s that article coming?” Felix the Fabulous from research asked as he leaned over her desk and eyeballed her computer with a cocked eyebrow Callie just knew he had waxed, but would never admit to.
Callie clicked off of Brian’s picture as fast as she could, like a kid with her hand stuck in the fudge pop box. She looked guiltily at Felix, then yawned to cover herself. Felix was young and hip and always had new ideas for a column for her. Most times Callie tolerated him because he was so helpful with research, but the undercurrent of helpfulness was followed shortly thereafter by his desire to have a stab at writing a column himself. Callie’s column.
“Oooh, who was that, Ms. Winston?” Felix cooed at her, mocking an effeminate tone which was quite the contrary to Felix’s manly-man exterior—sans the wax job.
Callie shrugged her shoulders and hid her face behind the fall of her hair as she pretended to actually be working instead of mooning over Brian’s picture. “Just a guy on the date site I joined for the column.”
Felix leaned over the desk again, his crisp black shirt didn’t have a single piece of lint on it, Callie noted. He was so perfect it made her teeth hurt, and his feathers were never ruffled. “How’s that going? I bet you got a ton of e-mail.” Felix smiled at her and waited for her answer. His mother would be so proud of how her payment plan to the orthodontist had paid off. Felix’s teeth literally gleamed, making Callie’s eyes hurt.
“What makes you say that?” Callie asked.
Felix cocked his gorgeous dark head, highlighted with subtle caramel streaks and said, “Well, here’s a clue. You’re one fine lady. You have great eyes. Your lips are to die for, even if you’re only a couple of years younger than my mother, I can say, quite honestly, she don’t look like you, babe.”
Callie threw her pen on her desk and started to laugh. “Felix! That’s not nice to say about your mother.”
Felix winked. “Well, it’s the truth, you’re what teenage wet dreams are all about.”
Callie crossed her eyes at him. “Please. I’m not even a moist dream, Felix, but thank you, kind sir.” Callie tipped an imaginary hat at him.
“Look, you can say whatever you want, but you’re hot and I know you probably don’t believe me when I tell you that, but there isn’t a single man in this building who doesn’t think so.” Felix paused a moment and scrunched his face up. “Well, wait, I take that back. There is the guy in printing, Esteban or something, but he’s so gay the word should be tacked onto his in hyphen form and even he thinks you have great hair. Other than that, I think we all agree you’re hot. So get over yourself.” Felix said, dismissing her protests.
The men in the building thought she was hot? Then why the fuck didn’t anyone ever ask her out? “If I’m so hot, why is it that I sit home every Saturday night watching reruns of Fantasy Island?”
Felix clucked his tongue and shoved his hands in his perfectly creased Armani trousers. “We all know you had a really rough time with the divorce. Yes, we talk, gossip abound and all, but you’re also sort of standoffish. Aloof.”
“Me? Rude?” Callie was astonished.
Felix shook his head. “No, I don’t mean that you’re rude. You’re a blast to work with. You have a great sense of humor, but no one can get too close to you. You won’t let them. It’s like this invisible aura thing. You’re very approachable in a professional capacity, but I wouldn’t ask you out for fear you’d whack my balls off.”
So now she was what, Xena Warrior Princess? “I didn’t realize I gave off those vibes,” Callie said tightly.
Felix held a hand up. “Don’t get snippy, Callie. I’m just telling you we all know the divorce was hell and you’ve been hurt, so we do our best to fight off our Neanderthal tendencies when you’re around.”
“I wouldn’t date anyone at work anyway, Felix,” she offered as compensation for her standoffish attitude. Jeez, like she was stuck up or something. It was true Callie hadn’t paid much attention to those around her who were of the opposite sex, but she didn’t want to emasculate them either.
“Well, then there ya go. You shouldn’t be offended at all. So tell me where we’re at for this article about online dating. Need me to go on the dates for you?”
Callie made a ball out of some crumpled paper and threw it at Felix’s head. “Get out of my office and let me wade through some more e-mail.”
Felix laughed and headed toward her door. “I knew you got a ton of e-mail, Ms. Thang.” He snapped his fingers in a big circle as he shut the door behind him.
Callie leaned back in her office chair and shook her head. All this talk of her “hotness” was starting to weird her out. It made her feel uncomfortable and stupid. However, had she known she’d possessed all of these feminine wiles she might have zapped a man or two a whole lot sooner.
Callie clicked on her e-mail and opened it to find more from Heavenly Hook Ups pouring in. She’d begun to lose interest in the e-mail game, because nothing compared to e-mail from Brian. As a matter of fact, she couldn’t think of anything else but Brian. It was unnerving, distracting and in general freaking her out.
And look, he’d sent her an e-mail… and to her private e-mail yet. Callie sighed as she ignored the crap from everyone else and clicked on it.
To: Writ
[email protected]
From: Brian_SOF
Subject: Hey, Callie!
Hey sweet pea,
I just wanted to tell you I hope you’re having a good day and let you know I’m looking forward to talking to you tonight.
Talk to you at eight,
Brian
Callie’s insides were on fire, lit by the torch that was Brian. He thought enough of her to send her an e-mail and just a simple gesture like that was enough to make a girl melt. She was trying not to melt too much, because she really needed to be careful, but the melt-factor was winning over her practical “what a load of bullshit” side.
To: Brian_SOF
Subject: Re: Hey, Callie!
Well, hey yourself! I’m having a long day and I can’t wait to go home. LOL. I’m looking forward to talking to you too, Brian.
Eight it is,
Callie
Callie sent it off with a goofy smile on her face and then tried to concentrate on her job, which was to go on dates and research the dating scene.
To: Writer66
From ZoomZoom
Subject: Ever seen…
…The movie The Wedding Singer? I love movies and I’d love to catch one with you sometime. Let’s get to know each other.
John
Wow. Not a purdy lips or eye comment to be found. How utterly refreshing. Callie looked at John’s profile and smiled, thinking he was attractive enough. Tall and slender, he stood near a boat in his picture. John was five-foot-ten and had a cute, dimpled smile. He sure didn’t look forty-two and he liked to go to the movies. He even liked romantic comedies.
To: ZoomZoom
Subject: Re: Ever seen…
Hey John,
I did see that movie and I love Adam Sandler! Tell me what brought you to online dating and how it’s gone for you so far.
Writer66
Callie wondered why some folks resorted to online dating. Did it just give you a bigger pool of fish to swim in? If most got even half of the responses she did, then the likelihood was that your chances were far greater for finding someone you were compatible with. Callie’s inbox tinkled with more incoming mail.
To: Writer66
From: ZoomZoom
Subject: Re; Re: Ever seen…
I like Adam Sandler too. I came to online dating because I’m not much of a bar fan. I hate to spend all of that money on drinking when I can go see a good movie instead and I don’t date my co-workers. I’d really rather share the movie with someone, though. Online dating seemed to be a better way to pick and choose dates. Hey, do you instant message? I’m online now at the site if you’d like to chat.
John
John seemed far too normal. He didn’t like to drink and he liked the movies. All average things compared to some of the interests she’d read in other people’s profiles. What could another instant message hurt, she decided. Callie logged onto Heavenly Hook Ups and searched for ZoomZoom’s profile, but he’d managed to see she’d logged on first. The site’s instant message box popped up with the picture of him from his profile in it.
“Hey, Writer66. Got a name?”
“Yes, it’s Callie. How are you today?”
“I’m great thanks, and you?”
“Really good. So tell me, have you had any dates as a result of the site?”
“Oh, yeah…if that’s what you want to call them.”
Callie cocked her head. “Bad experience?”
“Are you kidding? Bad isn’t even the half of it. I’ve been really careful since I went out with Margaret.”
She laughed and asked, “Margaret?”
“Yeah, Margaret. I saw her profile and I e-mailed her. We e-mailed for a while and she seemed pretty cool. We liked a lot of the same stuff and all. So I asked her out.”
“And what happened?”
“I forgot to ask if she had more than one tooth…”
Callie threw her head back and roared as she tried to respond. There were always dentures. “But teeth aren’t everything, you know. Did she have a nice personality?”
“Look, everyone says looks aren’t everything, but we’re all superficial to a degree, ya know? Teeth become kinda important when you take a woman out for a steak.”
Yeah, teeth would help when gnawing on a T-bone. “We are superficial. I agree, but abs of steel aren’t everything. I love to laugh and that beats abs of steel any day of the week,” Callie typed.
“Well, sorry, but it still doesn’t beat having teeth. I laughed alright, but it wasn’t with her.”
“So what did you do? Take her for a smoothie?”
“LOL. No, I took her for dinner and I gotta give her credit for being pretty adept at chewing on a steak with her gums. I said thanks very much and never called her back again.”
Callie pursed her lips and asked, “But did you enjoy her company?”
“Are you kidding? I couldn’t get past the fact that she had no teeth. Say, you have your mouth closed in this picture on the site. Do you have teeth?”
Laughing, Callie typed, “I have more than one…”
John hesitated for a moment and then typed. “I’m just checking. Sorry to be such a downer, but a guy’s gotta do what a guy’s gotta do.”
“I understand completely. You can never be too careful.”
“So you like romantic comedies?”
Callie nodded at the computer screen. “Yeah, I love them. You’re a rare find. Men don’t usually like them.”
“Maybe you’d like to catch one with me?”
Callie hesitated. Again, she didn’t want to become embroiled in another meeting of soul mates. “What are your expectations of a meeting, John? Like you, I’ve had an experience I’d rather not repeat, ya know?”
“Well, I don’t expect much, I’m just going to hope you have teeth. LOL and if not we can be friends. I think friendship is the good basis for beginning a relationship, don’t you?”
John sounded perfectly normal. Almost too normal…but Callie needed a variety of different perspectives on this dating thing and she couldn’t get that unless she went out on a date with someone else who provided it. “I do think friendship is important. Okay, John, when would you like to meet?”
“Great! I can’t wait to see you! How about tomorrow night? The Cinneplex on Del Rio? There’s a new Adam Sandler out and I think we’ll enjoy it.”
“What time?” Callie asked.
“How about the seven ‘o clock movie?”
Callie wrote it on her calendar and gave John her cell phone number.
“Hey, one more thing before you go, Callie. Do you like popcorn?”
Callie smiled. “Yeah, I do.”
“Great, I’ll see ya tomorrow.”
“Okay, John. I’m looking forward to it!”
Callie logged off and began to clear her desk to leave.
Brian would be calling tonight. John paled in comparison to Brian.
Oh, hell, what was happening here? Now everyone had to live up to Brian’s standards?
Callie shook her head.
Yeah, he was a hard act to follow.
Chapter 9
Callie wrung her hands nervously as she sat at the edge of her bed, toying with the thick comforter she’d so carefully picked out after she’d split with Frank. Her cell phone lay on it right next to her. Callie picked it up and eyed it as though it might bite her. Brian was due to call in five minutes and Callie’s stomach hurt from it.
What if they had nothing to talk about in a live conversation? What if there were long, awkward pauses? In an instant message, you had time to get your bearings and compose a sentence. Callie was quick, no doubt, but not with a man she was hot for. Not a man like Brian. What if Brian had a voice that sounded like Pee Wee Herman? What if he thought she did? And who said anything about being hot for anyone?
Oh, this was a mistake.
Big and waiting to blow up all over her sexy lips, thus blinding her bedroom eyes.
Her cell phone chirped, to the tune
of The Love Boat and Callie fumbled, then dropped it on the floor. She scrambled to grab it, letting it ring once more before she picked it up, breathless and her mind scattered in a thousand different places.
“Hello,” she answered, sorta with a question in her tone like she didn’t really know who was on the other end. As if her phone rang so often she couldn’t decipher who it might possibly be. As if…
Callie’s heart slammed against her ribs and the moments before she heard Brian’s voice for the first time passed like hours.
“Heyyy, Callie. It’s Brian. How are you?”
Ooohhhh…Ohhhhh. Callie gulped, then she gulped again because Brian’s voice was like…like…like butterscotch, hot and thick, honey-sweet and syrupy, candy to her ears. He reminded Callie of Harry Connick Junior. A long, slow drawl, southern, deep, low, intimate, as though he were telling her a secret that only she could share with him. It washed over Callie in rippled waves of delicious tones and dulcet whispers.
Oh, Jesus.
Speak, Callie—into the nice phone before the man thinks you’re a mute. Callie cleared her throat. “Hi, Brian, I’m fine and you?”
There was a small pause and then he said, “Wow…”
Wow… ”Wow?”
Brian cleared his throat, much the way she had. “Yeah, wow. You have an incredibly sexy voice. I didn’t know what to expect, but dayum…”
Ditto, Callie thought. Dayum and all that southern jazz. “Oh, thank you… You have a nice voice too, very Harry Connick Junior.”
He laughed, his chuckle was wicked and mischievous all rolled into one yummylicious package. “You mean redneck?”
Callie lay back on her bed and giggled. “No, I don’t mean redneck. It’s nothing like most southern accents I’ve heard. It’s—well, it’s very attractive.” Attractive? Um hello, was that not just an army of chills that shot up your spine? Attractive is a word for a new pair of shoes at Pay-Less, not a voice with the power to induce orgasms visible on the wet panties scale you talk so much about.
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