Seemed she was a chicken, too. She broke eye contact and looked out across the yard. It was too dark to see anything, but she could picture the rose bushes out by the fence and the huge trees that provided welcome shade. Years ago there’d been a makeshift fort out by the fence, which she’d built with Sarah.
“You’re smiling,” Seth said. “What are you thinking about?”
“I was thinking that Sarah always managed to get her way, even when she was little. She talked me into helping her make a fort one time. Followed me around for days begging me to help her until I finally relented.”
“I remember that fort.”
“You do?”
An odd look swept over his face, one she couldn’t quite read. “I helped you and Sarah build it. You couldn’t carry the plywood by yourself, and you weren’t too handy with a hammer.”
“You did?”
A hand went to his heart, and he staggered back like he’d been shot. “Ouch. Nice to know I made an impression on you on all those years ago.”
“Like you remember me any better,” she said, fighting a grin.
“You’d be surprised.”
“What?” Something in his tone had the hairs standing up on the back of her neck.
He cleared his throat. “Nothing.”
Julia looked past him into the apartment. Curious, she stepped over the threshold. The small space consisted of a single room. On one side sat an old leather couch and a battered coffee table. Against the opposite wall was a double bed with a beautifully patterned quilt featuring two interwoven rings. A television was set up so it could be seen from the bed or the couch. A kitchenette with a mini refrigerator, sink and a two-burner stove stretched across the back of the room.
Seth leaned against the doorframe. “Home sweet home.”
She drifted toward the bed and sat down. “What a gorgeous quilt.”
“It was a wedding gift from my grandmother.”
“She made it?” she asked, running her hands along the stitches.
“Beth used to wrap it around her shoulders when she had her chemo,” he said. “She was always freezing afterward.”
Since he’d brought up the subject, Julia felt brave enough to venture further into dangerous waters. “Is that why you ran the other night?” she asked. “Because of Beth?”
“Not entirely,” he said, refusing to look her in the eye.
“But partly?”
He shifted and looked over his shoulder. “Listen, I think maybe you should come back outside. You sitting on my bed is—”
Julia reached the balcony in seconds. “Tell me about her.”
Seth hesitated a moment, but then leaned over to rest his arms on the railing. “We met my sophomore year of college. We had American History together, and she sat two rows in front of me. I took one look at her, and I was a goner.”
“I bet she was sweet and cheerful.”
The words came out with a tinge of bitterness she couldn’t help.
Seth’s arched brow told her he hadn’t missed the acid. “You say that like those qualities are defects.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Yeah, you probably did,” he said, with a shake of his head. “The truth is, Beth was sweet and cheerful for the most part, but she was no pushover. I asked her out, and on that first date, I knew.”
“That you would marry her?”
“That she would be my life,” he whispered into the night.
He seemed to be struggling with his emotions, so she gave him time to compose himself. “Did she inspire you to become a minister?” she asked after a moment. “I have to tell you I never saw you as the ministerial type when we were kids.”
“Trust me, neither did I. I wanted to be a lawyer. I’d even gotten accepted into law school. The summer before I was supposed to start we went to visit Beth’s parents. Her father was a minister, and when I heard him preach I was blown away. I knew I had to do that.”
“You said earlier that she understood you like no one else because of her father.”
“She was aware of the frustration that goes along with this calling. She always seemed to know the right words to say to keep me from drowning in my own self-doubt.”
Julia couldn’t be bitter about that. “She knew how to keep the devil at bay.”
“That’s certainly an interesting way to put it,” he said, laughing at the description. “Beth probably could’ve taken on the devil and won. I didn’t realize how much I relied on her strength until it started to disappear.”
“I know she was sick for a long time.”
“The longest two years of my life,” Seth said, his voice catching a little. “Every day she got a little weaker, a little frailer, and I couldn’t do a thing to stop it. She was in a lot of pain in the end, and I couldn’t do a thing to stop that either.”
Julia’s bitterness disappeared, replaced only with sadness over the terrible loss he’d suffered. She hated the despair in his voice. Julia wished she could comfort him, but didn’t know how. She folded her arms across her chest to keep from reaching for him.
“I can’t imagine,” she said. “It must have been a nightmare.”
“Only I couldn’t wake up. After she was gone I could barely function. I don’t remember a thing I said the first six months. I have no idea how I managed to even keep my job.”
“It’s no wonder you moved in here,” she said, indicating the little apartment. “It’s a cozy little refuge, isn’t it? A place to escape and try to heal.”
“How do you do that?” he asked in amazement.
“What?”
“Manage to read my mind?”
Julia squirmed, uncomfortable with the thought. “It’s only an observation.”
“Then you’ve got a great gift for observation.”
“Comes from a lifetime of watching other people screw up their lives,” she said.
“Stop doing that.”
She blinked at his harsh tone. “Doing what?”
“Dismissing the things that make you special.”
“Getting a read on people is special?”
“Absolutely. You have a way of seeing through all the layers people put up to protect themselves, and that’s so rare,” he said, turning toward her. “So few people take the time to look below the surface in others. To see their pain and anger. Their joy. But you see it, and you respond.”
Why did she feel like crying? “Thank you. I think that’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.”
He gave a frustrated groan.
“What now?”
“You are a dangerous lady.”
“Me?”
“God, she doesn’t even see it!” he called out to the heavens.
“Are you praying?” she asked in bemusement.
“For strength. You tempt me, and it’s making me crazy.”
“Are you talking about the other night in the kitchen?”
“It goes way beyond last night,” he said, hands gripping the railing. “Did you know I had a wild crush on you when you used to live here?”
Julia’s mouth dropped open. “What?”
“I helped you build a fort.”
“You pounded nails so you could be near me?” she asked, batting her eyelashes at him. “What a way to court a girl.”
“It wasn’t like I could talk to you,” Seth said, shuffling his feet. “Not without sounding like an idiot.”
“I didn’t think you even liked me.”
A dry chuckle escaped from his chest. “Like and lust are two different things. You were every teenage boy’s fantasy. Everything about you fascinated me. The way you walked, the way you tossed your hair, even the way you smelled. It drove me nuts for two years.”
“I was your fantasy?”
“The problem is now you’re back, standing there looking like some kind of screen goddess, and you get me like no one ever has,” he said, as if she hadn’t spoken.
Her skin started tingling. “You thin
k I’m beautiful?”
“You’re so much more than beautiful.”
Jumping him right now would be bad… Right? “This is a little complicated.”
“You think?” he asked, drifting closer. “You’re a guest in Grace’s house and living about a hundred feet away. Plus, I am a minister, and it wouldn’t look good if I grabbed you right now and kissed you senseless.”
“Not in the job description?”
“Definitely not.”
“So, bad idea,” she said, taking the last step to close the gap between them.
“I’m sure it is.”
“Terrible,” she said, staring at her hand, which had somehow made its way to his chest.
Julia didn’t know who made the final move, but suddenly she was in his arms, and he was doing a pretty good job of kissing her senseless.
Who knew a preacher could kiss like this?
Somewhere down the block, a car door slammed, and they sprang apart as if a gun had been fired. Before her eyes, Julia watched Seth’s walls go back up.
“I should go back,” she said. “It might be Grace or some other nosy neighbor. Don’t want to start any bad rumors.”
“I’m sor—”
“Don’t you dare apologize,” Julia said, holding on to her jumbled emotions by a thread. “You’re finally learning to live again, and obviously dealing with crazy brides has rubbed off on me. So, let’s consider this a team effort and try to move on.”
“Julia—”
“I’ll see you around.”
You are the stupidest woman on earth.
Chapter Eleven
After spending the night tossing and turning, Julia realized her current situation could all be laid at Sarah’s door. If Julia hadn’t been guilt-tripped into taking over Marry Me, she would still be unaware Seth could make her toes curl with a simple kiss.
Life would be so much easier then because despite the unsettling attraction — and some pretty combustible chemistry — the same roadblocks to a relationship still existed.
Namely, his life calling and her lack of belief.
So, at 7:30 the next morning, Julia showed up at Sarah’s apartment.
A bleary-eyed Eric answered the door. He blinked in surprise. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m here about some doves.”
Another blink. “Doves?”
“Believe me, I’m just as confused,” she said, pushing past him. “Is Sarah up?”
At that moment Sarah called out from the bedroom. “Julia? Is that you?”
Julia followed the sound, and found that Sarah was indeed awake. The bedroom looked to be about the size of a shoebox. A queen-size bed took up most of the space. An ancient, faux-wood dresser had been shoved against one wall and a closet with sliding doors took up the other.
Good grief, Julia thought. They might have to put the baby in the sock drawer. There might not even be enough room for a bassinet.
Sarah sat up in the bed, a breakfast tray balanced over her legs. “Please tell me you’re going to stay awhile.”
“Are you kidding?” Julia held up a file folder. “I met with Catherine Manning yesterday, and there’s no way I’m planning anything without you.”
Eric came in and took the tray. “You girls have fun, but don’t overdo it.”
Sarah reached for the file. “I’ll be careful.”
“Thanks for coming,” Eric said as he passed. “Sarah’s been getting cranky staring at the walls all day.”
“Hey, it’s as much for my sanity as hers,” Julia said.
Once they were alone, Julia sat down on the bed. “The first item on the agenda is doves.”
“Doves?”
Julia laughed at Sarah’s confused expression. “Yes, I know. Your husband gave me the exact same look. Mrs. Manning wants three dozen white doves to be released the moment — and I emphasize the moment — the minister says “you may now kiss the bride”. So, do you rent them? Do they come through mail order? What?”
“Before we tackle the dove issue, why don’t you tell me what’s going on?” Sarah put the file down on the bed.
“Besides the Manning wedding?”
“You show up at my door at the crack of dawn all twitchy and agitated, and I don’t think it has anything to do with a wedding.”
“I’m not twitchy. I’m exhausted.”
“You’re also a bad liar.”
Julia bit her lip. “I think I’m going crazy.”
“Because of the business?”
“No, it’s Covington Falls. Sleeping in my old room. I spent fifteen years running from everything this town represented. Everything I couldn’t have. I learned to be happy with my life.”
“Were you happy?
“I don’t know.” Julia stood and started pacing the small room. “Before I came back here, I knew who I was. Where I was going. I was a career woman on my own. Now, everything is a mess, and it’s all your fault.”
“My fault?” Sarah echoed.
“Yes, you and that miracle baby. Not to mention your disastrous financial planning skills. I’m confused, and it’s making me do stupid things.”
“What kind of stupid things?”
“Oh, things like kissing totally inappropriate people.”
Sarah’s eyes widened. “Who have you been kissing?”
“Seth—”
Shoot, had she said that out loud?
Judging by the silence from the bed, she had.
“Come again?” Sarah said.
Julia flounced down onto the bed. “You heard me the first time,” she said, waiting for the outrage.
Instead, Sarah laughed in delight. “This is so cool.”
“That’s totally not the reaction I expected,” Julia said in stunned amazement. “I thought you’d be upset. His father is married to your mother. We’re practically related.”
“You’re not practically anything. Besides, I was hoping this would happen.”
“Hoping what would happen?”
“That you’d fall for each other,” Sarah said, her expression smug.
An awful thought seized her. “Wait a minute. Is Seth the reason you asked me to run Marry Me?” Julia eyed her stepsister with deep suspicion. “Did you have some kind of weird fix-up in mind?”
Sarah shook her head. “No, I did need you to run the business for me, but once I saw you, I couldn’t help thinking about it. You’re so beautiful. You were back then, but now you make me sick,” she said, with a teasing glint. “Seth would have to be blind not to notice. And I may be married, but I’ve certainly noticed he’s gorgeous.”
“Are you crazy? Did you think we’d take one look at each other, swoon into each other’s arms, and ride off into the sunset together?”
“I know it’s a bit unorthodox—”
“Unorthodox?“ Julia parroted. She jumped up again and resumed pacing. “You’re describing an episode on one of those terrible shock shows.”
“Oh, shoot, it’s not like you had a baby and didn’t know who the father was,” Sarah quipped.
Julia halted in mid-pace and glared. “Stop it. I’m freaking out here.”
“I’m sorry,” Sarah said, smothering a grin. “I’m trying to figure out what’s so terrible.”
Pacing resumed. “I can’t believe you don’t see it.”
“What is there to see, except that you’re both single, both in need of love, and obviously attracted to each other?”
“I see so many obstacles, I can’t even begin to count them.”
“I think the only obstacles are the ones you’re putting up.”
Sarah’s room didn’t allow for proper pacing, and dizziness had set in. Instead, Julia leaned back against the battered dresser.
“Why would you want me with Seth anyway?” she asked. “I assume you like him. Maybe even feel brotherly toward him. Why would you want anyone you care about to become involved with someone like me?”
“You’re not as mixed up as you think. You have such a
fire. You’re also fiercely protective, like one of those Amazon warriors going into battle. Seth needs someone like you. Someone who won’t be intimidated by the harpies at the church.”
“Don’t you think he also needs someone who shares his faith? I should think that would be up there at the top of the requirements for a minister’s wife. And I am absolutely not what his congregation would accept.”
“Why not?”
“Well, there’s the aforementioned lack of faith. I’m also an outsider with a fuzzy past in this town, thanks to my father. Plus, I don’t have the gentle spirit or the moral code they’d expect. I mean, look at the way they treat Meredith, and she was born here.”
“I think you’re strong enough to take it. Like Seth’s wife.”
“Like she had to take anything.” Julia held up her thumb and index finger an inch apart. “Beth Graham was this close to being named a saint as far as I can tell.”
“She didn’t have it so easy at first. She had to earn the trust of the people in this town.”
“I don’t think I could compete with someone so good.”
“Julia, there are no good people. Not if we compare ourselves to God. We’re all sinners, and our so-called good deeds aren’t what get us in to heaven. Only Christ can do that. Beth was human. She was a sinner, like I am, like Seth. Even my mother,” Sarah added.
Julia was startled into laughter. “Insane. You’re completely insane.”
“All I want is for Seth to be happy again. He’s been through so much. You can’t imagine what it was like watching him.”
“That’s what I mean. Thinking I could make him happy. There’s too much baggage there,” she said, going over to the bed to kiss Sarah on the top of the head. “Besides, you know how I feel about marriage. I’m not interested in going down that path.”
Sarah heaved a put-upon sigh. “Someday, Julia, you’ll have to stop running. I only hope it’s not too late when you finally realize it.”
Chapter Twelve
It was a Saturday, which meant Julia was thoroughly confused and bewildered as she stared at another one of Sarah’s wedding blueprints. She needed to figure out what the little triangles on the diagrams meant.
Today’s venue… the Good News Gospel church. The couple… Angela Jerome and Eddy Carmichael. Points in Julia’s favor…. the ceremony and reception were being held in the same place. After the vows, the guests would walk across the courtyard to the reception hall. Best idea Julia had ever heard. She could supervise both venues and didn’t have to worry about the stray killer bee.
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