by Jillian Hart
“Enough!” Katherine rolled her eyes. How much did she have to put up with? She knew her friends cared. She knew all the calls from her sisters were because they were rooting for her happiness. But a girl could only take so much. “I’m officially out of the hesitant stage, so you can stop now.”
Holly beeped the car doors unlocked with her remote. “Are you serious? You’re ready to admit you like him?”
“The uh-oh stage,” Marin said. “I named that stage. It’s where the doom of romance really starts. When you start caring. That’s when they’ve got you.”
“I feel so much better now,” Katherine commented as she climbed into the back seat. “What if I told you it’s more serious than that?”
“The point-of-no-return phase,” Marin said. “Although I call it the doom phase.”
Holly climbed behind the wheel and started the car. “You’re not helping, Marin.”
“Sorry. Too many years of marital counseling jades you just a tad. So, Katherine, you must feel pretty serious about this man.”
Serious. Why did her stomach knot up as if she were facing a jail sentence? “I haven’t had a connection like this with anyone before. I don’t know what it is. It’s very…encompassing. Intense. It’s like he just reached in and grabbed hold of my heart.”
“That’s seriously serious.” Marin flipped around in her seat. “Are you ready for this?”
“Can anyone be?” Katherine held up her hands, feeling helpless. She couldn’t think of a single word to describe how she felt. “I’ve never felt so strongly before, not even for Kevin, and I was in love with him. It scares me.”
“That’s how it is when love is real.” Holly backed the car out of the parking spot. “It’s scary because you have to trust that person so much with your heart and who you are. It’s like you have to open the most private rooms in your heart and let him in. That is one of the hardest things, to be honest and love without defense. After you’ve been hurt like you have, Katherine, it’s natural to try hard to keep him out of those places. But real love can never work that way. You have to let him in, just as he has to let you in.”
Marin nodded in agreement. “Are you going to trust Jack enough to open up to him the way you did with Kevin? Or not?”
“It wouldn’t have mattered if I had told Kevin before he asked me to marry him. He still would have had the same reaction.” She closed her eyes, unwilling to see Jack reacting the same way. Unable to let herself even imagine such a negative response. It would do more than hurt her, it would devastate her. “I made mistakes with Kevin.”
Mostly in keeping him at an emotional distance. Marin and Holly were right. She’d never trusted Kevin enough to let him in close. For some inexplicable reason, Jack could do that by the simple force of his personality or some heaven-sent design; she didn’t know which. She only knew that Jack had gotten beneath her defenses. Every single one of them.
As Holly drove the few blocks to the bookstore, their conversation turned to other things. But Katherine felt stuck in place, as if the back of her mind was working out what her friends had been trying to tell her. What she had been trying to figure out for herself.
When they pulled into the parking lot, she felt her spirit brighten, the way it did when she was near Jack. All it took was one glance to see his state cruiser nosed in at the sidewalk in a parking spot directly in front of the store.
If she was lucky, Marin wouldn’t notice or comment. Katherine unbuckled her seat belt, prepared just in case Marin started up again. “Thanks for driving, Holly. Bye!”
The instant her feet touched pavement, Katherine whirled to close the door and caught sight of Jack through the front window, in his uniform. The light within her brightened. She wasn’t aware of moving, but she was at the door, pulling it open with a jingle of the overhead bell. Jack turned toward the sound, looking over his shoulder. Their eyes met and Katherine felt the impact rock through her soul.
I love him. The realization blazed through her like a meteor. The sensible part of her seemed to fade away until there was only feeling. Only happiness. Only certainty.
“Katherine.” He seemed to light up. “Your cousin has been telling me what a good catch you are.”
“Too bad I have to fire her now.” Katherine gave Kelly a death-ray glare, but her cousin and best employee seemed immune to its effects. “Are you on your way to work?”
“Dropping off Hayden first.” He pocketed his wallet, took the plastic bag Kelly handed him over the counter and ambled her way. “You look beautiful.”
She missed a step, staring up at him as if he’d started speaking Swahili. Then she recovered and smiled shyly up at him. “Thank you.”
He had a thousand things he wanted to ask her about. All the things he didn’t know and they hadn’t shared. Not that he had time at this exact moment. And not that he wanted to get personal with so many members of her family watching. The twins had been changing the display tables in the front of the store and were obviously listening without any attempt to conceal it or even to appear as if they were working.
Kelly, who’d rung up his book purchase, was leaning expectantly over the counter, eyes bright and curious. Even the brother, Spence, whom he had yet to officially meet, had turned partway from his computer monitor and, while continuing to work, had cocked an ear toward his now-open door.
Not exactly a desirable courting atmosphere. Definitely not a private one. “Walk me to my ride?”
“Sure. Maybe then everyone can get back to work.”
Ava and Aubrey didn’t budge. Neither did Kelly.
Jack opened the door for Katherine. She brushed by him, close enough for him to smell the soft floral fragrance of her shampoo, to see the light gold of her hair gleam like platinum in the sunlight. She was so feminine and fragile; tenderness reared up inside him as he followed her outside. She made him feel ten feet tall.
As if nervous or unsure, she folded a lock of hair behind her ear. “I’ve been meaning to run something by you. It’s about Hayden.”
“Uh-oh.” That can’t be good. He tried to focus, but all he seemed to notice was the porcelain fineness of Katherine’s complexion and the delicate cut of her jaw. A wave of affection rolled through him, filling him to the brim.
“No, it’s not bad, so don’t worry. It’s that Hayden’s volunteering here was your idea. I was willing to see how it went, but she surprised us. She’s a hard worker.”
“And her attitude?”
Katherine wisely skipped that one. “This will be her last week, and Spence and I are so pleased with her work ethic, that we’d like to pay her minimum wage for the hours she’s worked.”
“That’s generous, but it would defeat the purpose.”
“It’s still something Spence and I would like to do. Even Ava said so. It’s one thing to have a teenager work off a debt of sorts. It’s another when she works harder than Ava.”
He was in serious trouble. He couldn’t say no to her. He was hands-down, one-hundred-percent, all the way in love with this woman. The kind of abiding love that did not end, that did not diminish, that gave a man purpose and hope.
“All right,” he agreed. What else could he do? “It’ll be a reward for working hard.”
“Good justification.” Katherine flashed a dazzling smile.
Yep, he’d do just about anything for her. Move mountains. Ensure happiness. Provide eternal devotion. “I’ve got to go. Mrs. Garcia will be picking Hayden up in a few hours. But I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon?”
“Unless I change my mind.” She took a step back, smiling up at him. “That’s unlikely.”
“Good to know.” Jack’s dimples cut deep into his cheeks as he stepped off the curb, a big bear of a man, outlined by the bright spring sunshine.
His gaze held hers a second longer, and for that instant in time she could see the future. Her dream for the future. Maybe his. She didn’t know which. Only the long solid closeness of an intimate marriage, where they were best f
riends, partners, confidantes, best everything.
“My luck with second dates is much better,” he said as he opened his car door. “You wait and see.”
Katherine didn’t know if it was a promise or a threat. It felt like both. Maybe Marin was right in calling it the doom phase because she was hooked, not just by the heart, but deeper. As if her spirit was linked to his irrevocably.
She squinted in the sun, watching Jack’s cruiser cross the lot, whip out onto the street and disappear in traffic. She shivered in the crisp wind, feeling, just feeling. No defenses, no buffer, just pure hope.
“Katherine?”
She startled, surprised to realize Kelly was standing beside her.
Kelly was smiling knowingly, as if she understood all too well. Her engagement ring, a flawless dazzling diamond, sparkled. “I hate to cut into your daydreaming time, but Spence wants to see you. Another tenant in the corner office is pulling out. Plus, Ava and Aubrey are really going at it. You might want to referee.”
“My destiny in life.” She didn’t mind; she felt the pull of work and her responsibilities, but she couldn’t seem to make her feet work. She was rooted in place, as if trying to hold on to a moment that had already passed. How could it be possible she missed Jack already? “I’ll be right in.”
Kelly didn’t budge either. “Hayden seems pretty unhappy about this. Her glare factor has turned toxic. She’s been staring poison at you.”
Katherine nodded. She didn’t know what to say. Jack had to know how his daughter felt. “And I was just starting to feel…” as if this was a dream in the making. “When I’m with him, it’s as if I’m standing in the brightest sunshine. When he’s gone, I’m alone in the dark.”
“Sounds like the real thing to me.” Kelly made her engagement ring sparkle again, just to admire it. “Sometimes I still can’t believe this is real. It’s like I’m waiting to wake up and realize falling in love with Mitch was just a dream.”
“He’s a good man, and you deserve to be cherished by him forever.” Katherine’s heart filled with sympathy and caring for her cousin. Kelly’s road had once been difficult, too.
Kelly sighed, an utterly contented sound of happiness. “Do you know what someone said to me a while back? Good things happen to good people. Now I’m saying it to you. This will work out for your greatest good. I know it.”
“I pray that’s true.” Katherine fell silent, keeping her fears inside.
Chapter Fifteen
The image of Katherine standing in front of the store, washed in sunshine, stayed with him like a beacon, guiding him and growing more radiant every time he thought of her.
“Dad, this is so bogus.” Hayden slumped in her seat looking as sour as ever. “Thought I was done with this youth-group junk.”
“What’s with the attitude about the youth group?” Jack didn’t get it. He eased the SUV through the icy lot, looking for parking. The place was packed. “You liked the youth group at our old church.”
“That was before I had nothing in common with them.”
Whatever lay behind that sounded like a long discussion to him, and they were running late as it was. He pulled into the fire lane alongside the curb. “We’ll unload you, so you can meet Marin on time. Then we’ll talk on the way home.”
“More joy to look forward to.” She rolled her eyes, released her seat belt and bolted out of the vehicle.
She was particularly sour today, as overcast and angry as the sky. Black clouds shoved at the mountain peaks, obscuring them. The wind had a vicious bite as he climbed out to fetch Hayden’s skis from the roof rack.
She didn’t seem thrilled when she took possession of them and leaned them against her shoulder. “You’re going to meet her again.”
He nodded. “I’m giving you time to get used to the idea. So it would be good for both of us if you did that before we head home tonight.”
“The joy never ends.” With that she stomped away.
He loved his little girl; not that she was so little anymore, but she would always be his little Hayden. Nothing could ever tarnish his commitment to her. He’d prayed hard and he was sure of his path. He wanted the best possible outcome for his daughter. And for himself.
He loved Katherine with such devotion for a reason. She couldn’t have captured his heart unless she had a heart big enough to love Hayden, too. He knew she did. And that only made him love Katherine more. This would be the best thing for all of them, he was positive. As he drove around impatiently, looking for an available spot, he had plenty of time to think. To prepare.
While he and Katherine were only officially on date number two, they’d already been through a lot together. Enough for their initial affection to turn into something substantial. No, correct that. Into something rare. Such a strong stirring of love, soul-deep, could only be heaven sent. Meant to be.
Finally someone backed out of a spot and he slipped into it. Cut the engine. Pulled the brake. He was hardly aware of the vicious bite of the freezing air when he opened the door, or the slight slip of his boot on the ice when he stood. What he did feel was Katherine’s presence like the air on his face. She was an awakening in his spirit that was pure destiny.
He didn’t have to look around the crammed acre-wide parking lot to search for her. He turned toward her, finding her by feel. The brightness within his soul intensified when their gazes locked. She was waiting just beyond the entrance to the lodge, at the edge of the skiing area, looking amazing. When she smiled, it moved through him like grace.
His heartbeat thundered to a stop and he reached for her hand. Through layers of fabric, he could feel the weight of her hand, the shape, the warmth and the connection. Maybe it was more than physical touch, he realized. More like spirit touching spirit.
Words lost their meaning. He couldn’t find a single way to say what he felt, and anything as mundane as “Hi,” or “It’s good to see you,” fell far short of the experience of holding her hand, gazing into her eyes and seeing forever. Their forever.
Like a dream, he leaned forward, inexorably, moved by feeling and not thought. He watched Katherine’s eyes grow wider, as if in surprise, and then she dipped her chin, shy, and gazed up at him through her lashes.
He knew that she felt this, too. Closer still he leaned, towering over her, slanting his mouth over hers. A hush filled him, soul-deep, and he brushed his lips to hers in a first, tentative kiss.
Time stood still, the world stopped turning, and it felt as if heaven watched, waiting. Jack was aware of Katherine’s fingers tightening around his, and he felt the tides of her heart, her hope for his honest love, her dreams that were exactly his.
Perfection. He straightened slightly, breaking their kiss just enough so he could look at her. Feel her smile. See her love for him in her eyes. Know that she felt this monumental change, too.
It was all there on her face, in her heart and soul. He cradled her chin in his free hand, thinking how precious she was, and wanting nothing more than to cherish her the way a husband cherished a wife. With all he was and all he had and all he would ever be.
She was blushing slightly, shy and demure, but she looked happy. “I was going to ask you where your skis are, but, wow, my mind is a complete blank.”
But not your heart. He kissed her again.
No, not my heart, she thought, letting her eyelids drift shut, giving herself up to the sweetness of his kiss. More confident this time, she curled her fingers into his coat, holding on. Like sunlight warming all the shadows and hurt places, his kiss filled her with hope, with a perfect peace, with a love so bright she was blind to everything else but this man.
When he lifted his lips from hers, the bond of their hearts remained. This was definitely a sign, she thought as she let him gather her in his iron-strong arms and fold her against his chest. She sighed, resting against him, her heart full, and her soul brimming, no longer afraid to believe. She felt his kiss through the knit yarn of her ski cap.
“It’s cold out he
re,” he said.
“Is it cold? I hadn’t noticed.”
His chuckle rumbled through his chest and into her. “I was hoping to get you inside where it’s warm. And where I can order some lunch before we hit the slopes. I didn’t get a chance to eat.”
“Sure.” What she wanted was to stay like this forever, in his arms, against his heart and never let him go. As if he could sense her wish, he slid one arm around her shoulder, keeping her close, and took her hand in his free one, holding her as they walked side by side.
This is more than a dream, it’s a prayer answered, Katherine thought as she practically floated down the sidewalk and into the lodge. She hadn’t been this happy in forever.
“It’s packed.” Jack’s words tickled her ear. “Let me go see if I can persuade the waitress to serve us in the extra dining room. Stay here where it’s warm.”
Only then did she realize she was standing in the radiant heat of the enormous fireplace, with skiers all around her. They were chattering over cups of tea or hot chocolate, warming up before going back out and making the most of the fresh powder.
Her happiness lifted a notch when she spotted Jack at the hostess’s stand, talking with the manager. He looked good, solid, and he was hers. This all feels too good to be true, she thought, pulling off her gloves. But it is true. This is really happening.
Please, Lord, don’t let this end.
“Katherine!” It was Lori Brisbane, a member of their church and a longtime bookstore customer, coming out of the gift shop. “It’s wonderful to see you out of the store enjoying yourself. Did you know that Ava did my sister’s wedding cake? Kristy was in tears she was so happy with it.”
Katherine nodded, although she hadn’t heard that bit of news. That Ava and her secrets. “Have you heard from Kristy?”
“Are you kidding? She’s in Hawaii. She doesn’t have time for her sister.” Her smile was bright and joyful. “Although I’ll be having a honeymoon of my own soon. I just got engaged.”