“I never thought I’d see this thing again.” Truth to be told, he’d hoped he never would. The ring represented every hope and dream he’d ever held in his heart for the two of them. When it had all crashed and burned, he’d wanted the ring to go up in smoke along with everything else.
“Take it. Please,” she begged. “I’ve felt so guilty about holding on to this. It doesn’t belong to me anymore.”
“I can’t take it,” he whispered, his eyes rooted to the box. His nostrils flared. His breathing was uneven. Taking the ring back would be like losing Cassidy all over again. He didn’t think he could go down that road again. It was too dark and twisted. Too filled with peril.
“I can’t keep it.” Her voice sounded agonized. She reached for his hand and tucked the box in his palm. She then folded his fingers over the box. She clasped his hand for a moment, then let go, her eyes shimmering with emotion.
He clenched his teeth. “I won’t ever give this ring to another woman. It may have been in my family for generations, but from the moment I placed it on your finger, I knew it was made for you.” He locked gazes with her, beseeching her for understanding. “Don’t you see, Cass? All I think of when I see this ring is you.”
There would always be a place in his heart carved out just for her. It was that simple. He was no longer in love with her, but she had a forever kind of place in his heart. And this diamond engagement ring represented one of the darkest chapters in his life. Having it back in his possession was yet another reminder of everything that had fallen apart.
Lord, please help me. Give me the strength to accept this ring back with the same grace that I gave it to the woman I loved.
Cassidy hung her head. “I felt so honored to wear your ring. Every time I looked at it, there was such joy in my heart. The day you gave it to me was the happiest day of my life.”
He let out a deep shudder. “Mine too. I had so many dreams that were wrapped up in the two of us. I never told you this, but I already had a house in mind for us to buy. I’d already approached the Realtor about making an offer on it.”
Cassidy’s eyes widened in surprise. “Which one?”
“That yellow Victorian out by the swimming hole. The one with the tire swing in the side yard and the pretty garden.”
“I used to love that house,” she said in a wistful voice that echoed his own feelings.
Tate just nodded, at a loss as to what to say at this point. They’d pretty much said it all.
Silence stretched between them. It wasn’t an awkward silence, he realized. It felt like two people who were so comfortable with one another that they didn’t need words to fill the silence. It had always been this way between them and he knew now it always would.
“I was watching you break in that stallion,” she said, her gaze focused on the horses being led into the corral. One was a chestnut-colored mustang, the other a white palomino.
He turned toward her, noticing the way her eyes lit up at the sight of the horses. Somehow he’d forgotten how much Cassidy had always enjoyed being at the ranch and going riding with him. It seemed like a lifetime ago. Although she’d never been the most accomplished rider, she’d been more joyful riding a horse than almost anyone he’d ever known.
“His name is Rebel. He’s all kinds of trouble, but I think he’s a keeper.” Tate felt a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “When he arrived here he was meaner than a rattlesnake, and his bite was almost as deadly. He’s coming along though.”
“Rebel. I like that.”
“If you like him, you’ll absolutely fall in love with Fiddlesticks.”
“Fiddlesticks?” she asked with a chuckle. “What kind of name is that?”
Tate affected an outraged look. “Fiddlesticks is an awesome name. We’re actually waiting for her to give birth to her foal. It’ll be anytime now.”
Malachi came running out of the stables, a frantic look etched on his face.
“Tate! I think it’s almost time,” he shouted. “I could use a hand in here.” His handsome Native American features were pulled tight with anxiety. Without another word he raced back into the stables. So much for calm, cool and collected, Tate thought. He’d never seen his best friend move so fast.
He made a face at Malachi’s retreating figure. “I better head in there before he loses his cool. He hasn’t had a lot of experience with foal births.”
“I should be heading home anyway.” She cast a nervous glance at the sky. “There’s a storm heading our way.”
“Drive home safely, ok?” He couldn’t help but feel protective of her.
He watched her walk toward her car, her movements easy and graceful. Before he could change his mind he ran after her, calling out her name. When she turned around he was standing there with his hands jammed into his back pockets, feeling a bit sheepish.
“Is something wrong?” she asked, her face showing concern.
“No, everything’s fine. I just wondered if you might want to stay for a bit, to watch the foal being born.”
He watched as she glanced up at the sky again. Although the wind had kicked up a bit, there was no rain falling and the sky was still light. The storm was still hours away.
Cassidy nodded her head and smiled. “I’d love to see the foal being born. It’ll be a first for me.”
Tate detected a hint of anxiety in her eyes and he wondered if it was about the approaching storm. “If you’re worried about the storm, I can drive you back home later,” he suggested. “And Malachi can drive your car behind us.”
“No, it shouldn’t be a problem. It hasn’t even started raining yet.”
“Well then,” he said with a grin, “let’s go inside before Fiddlesticks scares the stuffing out of Malachi.”
The sound of Cassidy’s tinkling laughter warmed his insides, making him feel as if he’d performed an amazing feat. Her eyes at the moment looked like glittering emeralds and her pretty mouth made him think of sweet kisses in the moonlight.
Whoa! He was starting to feel like one of his untamed stallions who needed to settle down. What he and Cassidy now shared was friendship, pure and simple. He couldn’t let his mind go to that place, that faraway place where all his dreams lived. Those dreams were all tied up with the past. With one last look at Cassidy he ushered her into the stables and set about the business of delivering Horseshoe Bend Ranch’s newest foal.
* * *
Four hours later and she and Tate were still awaiting the birth of Fiddlesticks’s foal. Malachi had taken off a few minutes ago so that he could check on some of his relatives at the reservation. He was concerned that some of them wouldn’t have heard about the oncoming storm and might get stuck in dangerous situations. Although he was a man of few words, Malachi’s altruistic actions spoke volumes about his character. She had enjoyed watching the close relationship between Malachi and Tate—the easy laughter that flowed between them and the way they worked in sync as a team.
At the moment Tate seemed a little concerned about the lack of progress the mare was making in delivering her foal. He got down on his knees and spent a few minutes checking out Fiddlesticks. She was stretched out on her side and her legs were thrashing around. Tate was running his hand along the mare’s back and massaging her spine.
“How’s she doing?” Cassidy asked as Tate exited the stall, his jeans looking a little worse for wear.
“She’s not laboring heavily yet, although she’s sweating quite a bit. She’s lying on her side, so she’s probably having some contractions. I don’t think she’s ready to deliver this foal just yet though.”
“Does Holly know about Fiddlesticks?”
“No, I haven’t spoken to her today. She left town yesterday for a rehabilitation program in New York. They flew her down there as part of a scholarship she won.” Tate beamed proudly. “It’s quite an hono
r for her. My dad flew down with her since she hasn’t flown by herself since...well, since the accident.”
She felt a twinge of sadness that Holly hadn’t shared her exciting news with her. Over the past few weeks they’d talked a few times on the phone and made plans to have lunch as soon as her mother was feeling better. She knew she shouldn’t feel disappointed, since rebuilding their friendship would take time. Although they’d mended fences, it wasn’t an instant fix. There was still work to be done.
“The program teaches independence to people with spinal cord injuries. It’s one of the most successful programs in the country,” Tate explained. “It’s fairly expensive, so the scholarship was a blessing.”
“She seems pretty sure of herself. I once heard the expression ‘putting the able in disabled.’ When I think of Holly that’s what I think of.”
“She projects confidence, that’s for sure. But there’s a lot of fear there. She still has some mountains to conquer...riding again, going on a plane by herself, dating. She used to love riding, but she’s scared to death about getting back in the saddle.” A deep sigh escaped his lips. “And the thought of traveling on a plane alone makes her anxious. She says that if something were to happen on the plane she wouldn’t be able to save herself. She’s actually suffered a few panic attacks.” He shrugged. “Most women her age go on dates—to the movies, dinner, dancing...” His voice trailed off. “There hasn’t been anyone special in her life since high school.”
His voice sounded troubled and she longed to make him smile again. He’d always carried the weight of the world on his shoulders, seeming to care about other people’s problems more than he cared about his own.
“Those things can be problematic for able-bodied people,” Cassidy quipped. “And we all have fears. I was shaking in my boots my first day back in town.”
Tate looked embarrassed. “Was that before or after you got an earful from me?”
“I don’t blame you for being angry,” she said in a quiet voice. “I expected it.”
“I don’t like feeling angry, Cass. It’s not who I am, nor who I want to be.”
“I feel like there’s a but in that sentence.” She knew this man so well. At one point in time she could practically finish his sentences for him. “Don’t hold back. I can take whatever you have to throw at me.”
“I’ve been so angry for so long. Since the accident. Since you left.” He looked at her with wounded eyes and she felt her heart breaking all over again. “You leaving Holly like that, it was devastating. As a brother it killed me to watch her fall apart. But you leaving me like that and calling off our wedding...it broke me, Cass. As a man, it broke me right here.” He thumped his fist on his chest. His shoulders were slumped, his head bowed. “It hurts my pride to even admit that.”
She swallowed past the huge lump in her throat. “It hurts to know I’ve made you feel this way.”
“I defended you, did you know that? To my family, to my friends, to everyone who mattered to me. I told them it was an accident, that it could have happened to anyone. I still wanted to marry you. I wanted to make a life with you, to forgive you, to help others forgive you. And then you took off without a word of goodbye. You bailed on us!”
She blinked back tears. “I can’t change the past, Tate. No matter how much I wish I could.”
His voice softened and became almost tender, as if he’d had all the wind blown out of him. “I know you’re looking to make up for the past. I can’t blame you for that. It must feel awful coming back to a town that doesn’t quite accept you. The other day you asked me why I can’t show you forgiveness? What you don’t understand is that I’m trying to. I want to show you mercy. And kindness. But forgiveness. I struggle with it.”
She reached out and touched his cheek, her hand brushing against rough stubble.
“You’re human, Tate. It’s not an easy thing. Forgiveness is something that’s earned. I don’t expect to earn it all at once.” She smiled at him. “I consider it a major step in the right direction that we’re able to sit here talking like two old friends. And you have been merciful. And you have been kind.”
Tate met her gaze head-on and for a moment they got lost in each other’s eyes. The energy in the stables shifted as awareness flared between them. He reached out and swept her hair away from her face, his touch full of tenderness. Strong arms looped around her waist, pulling her into his soft embrace. Somehow she’d forgotten how safe she felt in Tate’s arms, how he was the only one who’d ever given her a soft place to fall. She’d missed their connection and the sense of security he’d always given her. She’d missed him.
He held her for a few moments before pulling away. She raised both of her hands and placed them on either side of his face, gazing intently into his beautiful blue eyes. If only, she thought, this perfect moment could last forever.
Tate leaned down, his face hovering over hers, his hands gripping her arms. Just as she thought he was going to place his lips over hers, he abruptly moved away. She looked into Tate’ s troubled eyes—they were churning with emotion.
“I’m sorry about that,” he said, a dazed expression on his face.
“You don’t have to be sorry.” She tried to make eye contact with Tate, but he was looking everywhere but in her direction.
“I should never have tried to kiss you,” he said in a strangled voice, his eyes full of regret.
Chapter Seven
Tate combed his fingers through his dark mane of hair. “I’m not making excuses for almost kissing you, but seeing you, spending time together...it’s stirring up all kinds of emotions. I just don’t want us to get carried away and then regret it later.”
He made it sound as if kissing her would be a burden. A regret! Her cheeks burned with embarrassment. This was certainly the first time in her life someone had expressed regret about the possibility of kissing her. It prickled her pride and hurt her feelings at the same time. Right now all she wanted to do was make a quick exit and forget all about watching Fiddlesticks give birth. That way she could lick her wounds in private.
All of a sudden the stable doors flew open. A huge gust of wind blew inside, heralding the arrival of a figure draped in a soaking wet rain slicker. They stepped apart from each other, both acting as guilty as a fox raiding the chicken coop.
The hood of the rain slicker came down, revealing a disheveled looking Maggie Lynch. Her hair was coming undone from her bun and her glasses were fogged over with rain. Cassidy noticed she’d gotten a little rounder over the years and she was sporting a few gray hairs at her temples. Maggie had always reminded her of a beautiful china doll with her wide expressive eyes and her rounded cheeks. Nothing had changed in that regard. She was still striking.
“Tate, I came to tell you that they’ve upgraded the storm warning for this area. They’ve now issued a tropical storm warning,” she announced as she ambled toward them from the doorway. “It’s already raining like cats and dogs out there. I had no idea you had company.”
Her eyes went wide as soon as she got close enough to recognize Cassidy. She turned to Tate, a look of confusion overwhelming her doll-like features.
“Tate? What is she doing here?” Her voice came out hardened, rough around the edges. She didn’t sound at all the way Cassidy remembered.
Tate was eying his mother warily. “She came back home for a spell, Mama, to visit with her folks. I invited her to stay and watch the foal birth.”
Maggie’s gaze shifted back to Cassidy. She looked as if she’d had the biggest shock of her life.
Unsure of what to say or do, Cassidy’s home training took over. “Hello, Maggie.”
“Cassidy.” Maggie nodded her head in her direction, still looking a little dazed by her presence at Horseshoe Bend Ranch. “I haven’t laid eyes on you since the night of the accident when you picked Holly up at the house. Th
e next time I saw my daughter she was lying broken and battered in an emergency room.” Her tone was terse and no-nonsense. “I didn’t see you at the hospital or the rehab appointments. You didn’t call the house once. Holly asked about you every day for three months straight. I just want to let you know you broke all of our hearts.”
“Mama! That’s enough!” Tate said in a raised tone. “She’s already acknowledged that she didn’t do the right thing.”
Cassidy reached out and placed her hand on his arm. “It’s okay. She’s just getting it off her chest.” Shame ate at her, the same way it had dozens of times before.
“No, it’s not okay.” He cast his mother an angry look. “At some point we all have to move past the anger...that includes you, Mama.”
“Cassidy should be making her way back home.” Maggie’s face was drained of color. She looked like she’d lost all her fight. “The storm has come earlier than predicted.”
Cassidy walked toward the barn’s entrance and looked through the partially opened door. The rain fell down in torrents, obscuring her view of the ranch. She could barely make out the corral in the distance. When had it started raining? Had she and Tate been so caught up in their own little world that they’d failed to notice the sudden onset of the storm?
She jumped as the crack of thunder boomed in the distance. A bolt of lightning streaked across the darkening sky. She looked up at the heavens, her nerves frazzled, torn between being a part of something beautiful, and fear. More than anything she’d wanted to stick around the ranch and watch the birthing of the foal. But now because she’d waited too late, she would be forced to drive home in driving winds and rain.
The very thought of it made her freeze up. It was pouring outside now, and the wind was kicking up something fierce. Cassidy hated driving in rain-slickened conditions. Never mind a torrential downpour. It gave her the shivers, reminding her too much of the night she’d tried so hard to forget.
Reunited with the Sheriff Page 10