by Chaim, Moran
“We don't have those, unless you start basic training with the six year olds.”
“I can't do that. What can I do?”
“Stay a storyteller, or a plumber, or a janitor. We need those desperately.”
Wow, so many options…this place is just shitty. I didn't want to be frozen in the first place, nor did I want to be revived. Now they put me here and tell me to clean their toilets? No way, no way. There must be something else I can do.
“Thank you so much,” I said, and left.
“What about laundry?” He shouted.
Coming from his mouth it almost sounded promising. Yeah, why not? Maybe I’ll be a laundry technician. No, I want to be a detergent engineer, or cleanliness scientist. How come in year 2321 there are still people who do these jobs? It's unbelievable. What happens if I don’t get a job and President Padma decides to assimilate me?
I walked out of the lab and I thought I should start to get comfortable in this place without a guide, if I wanted to feel part of it. I needed to clear my mind of that last experience, anyway. I started walking clockwise next to the inner wall which meant that the curve was to the right behind me. I’m sure that people noticed I was a newbie. I wished I could go outside and run. That was usually what kept my temper down. It would release all my anger and I would come back exhausted and fueled with endorphins. The problem was that I couldn't go out because that could get me assimilated or shot at. I thought about the doctor who said “Help us” on my first day, and how could I even help, and to whom. I just kept on walking and I came across a gym. I used to hate gyms. I hated running on a treadmill like a human version of a hamster wheel. I hated how everybody showed off their muscles and didn't wipe the sweat off the seats. But that's the only escape I had at the moment, and I had to run my anger off. Stupid brain test. I wasn't even aware of everything that happened at once. How could I succeed in something I had no control over? That was so unfair. I bet they did it at a young age to indoctrinate the children so they wouldn’t rebel later. They probably told them how special and gifted they were so the kids thought they were the best.
The gym looked quite ordinary; white facilities, black weights. The treadmill was a little different, though. Above it was a helmet hanging from wires that ran from the ceiling. I put it on. It turned out to be a simulation helmet, which made me happy because I hated running and not seeing the view change. I could choose from several backgrounds like a desert, a jungle, a savanna and a snowy plane. I chose the savanna and started running. I didn't stretch or anything, nor did I care. The simulation was so real I forgot where I was for a second and panicked. I started running and the cool thing was that when I wanted the zebras to run with me, they immediately did. I started running faster. I left my zebra friends behind and got next to a cheetah that ran faster than me. I tried to catch it and felt my heart pumping fast. It felt good.
“Want to race?” I heard a voice ask me.
“Hi, you want to race?” It asked again.
I took the helmet off. Then I saw a boy younger than me with olive skin and short hair, running on a nearby treadmill.
“I am ok, thank you.”
“Why you talk so slow?”
“Why you talk so fast?” I replied.
“I talk normal. So why not?”
“I was just defrosted. I can’t compete.”
“Are you the soldier?”
“What?”
I couldn't understand him, and I was panting from my run nonetheless.
“S-o-l-d-i-e-r?”
“Yes.”
What a douche.
“Let’s race. What are you afraid of?”
“Fine,” I grunted.
He was so annoying that I didn't even care to lose as long as afterward he’d let me be. I admit, it was nice talking to someone new. So I put the helmet back on and saw him warming up next to me. I made him wear leopard skin and colored his face with war paint just for fun. It made him look less annoying.
“Ok,” he said, “see the smoke?”
“Yes.”
I saw a smoke pillar in the distance. He must've created that himself.
“That's the finish line. Ready?”
“Yes.”
A big red “3” appeared in front of my face. Then a “2” and a “1” and then a buzzing sound, and we started to run. He was fast but I knew I could keep up. I was already warmed up so I had the advantage. I opened a margin in front of him and felt the wind hitting my face. He smiled and looked forward like a hawk on a rabbit. Then he ran like hell. I was so surprised that I almost forgot to run. I had to pace up and try to reach him. I was three feet behind him, then four and five and six. By the time he got to the finish line I already gave up. My heart was racing and I was breathing heavily. My muscles were sore and I was sweating like a pig. I took the helmet off and I saw his stupid smile. It seemed like no effort for him.
“So that’s the famous soldier.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You don't look like a soldier and you don't run like one.”
“Who do you think I am?”
“Everyone knows who you are. But I know you can’t help us. Don't worry soldier, next time you'll win, maybe.”
“Help who, how?” I asked.
“See you,” he said, and left the gym.
“Wait, tell me how?” I tried to follow him but I couldn’t spot him in either direction.
I was confused and beaten by a teenage boy. That little prick. Maybe I was indeed too slow for this place.
Chapter 6
I came back to my room and went into the shower. I’d mastered the washing routine: ten seconds of water, followed by the soap spray, and then ten seconds of water to rinse it all out. Then air dry with germs. It wasn't pleasant at all. Since I didn't yet know how to get a fresh pair of overalls I had to dry my sweaty one and wear them again.
I sat on my simulation bed and saw the other people in the room lying in their permanent state of assimilation. I assumed Isaac’s wife was also among them. I couldn't see their faces under the bed cover but their body posture seemed calm. I wondered what might happen if he tried to open the bed and free her. It might be too traumatic for her. Who knows what life she had built for herself in there? Maybe she was young again and just started a whole new family. Maybe she lives in the twenty-first century Venice or Hawaii. Maybe she went back to her childhood home. It didn't sound so bad. It's better than being a plumber, a cleaner or even a storyteller. I had no stories in me anyway.
Oh wait. I have one. Don’t die and go to the future. The climate is horrible and you'll be forced to live underground and clean toilets all day. How’s that for a life lesson, kids?
Isaac came back looking for me. He studied my face and remained standing.
“Not what you hoped for?” He asked.
“No.” I shrugged.
“What kind of ‘No’?”
“I got nothing; I can't do anything in this place.”
“Did he say why?”
“I am not fast enough and my logic isn't strong enough. So I am left with plumbing, cleaning and laundry. Which is by the way something you didn't explain to me, and now I'm sitting in my stinky overalls after running in the gym.”
“You went to the gym?”
He raised his eyebrows.
“Yeah, why?”
“No one goes to the gym.”
“So, you were about to explain laundry.”
“Oh yes,” he said, and pulled a drawer off the wall. He handed me clean overalls and I changed in the shower. I gave him the dirty one and he put it in another drawer.
“Anyway, you can still be a storyteller if you want.”
“Or assimilate. President Padma has already presented me with that option.”
“Yes, you were about to cross the line. It’s good they caught you. You could have gone to trial for sneaking outside. Or worse, been hurt or killed.”
“I was already killed, remember?”
He couldn’t
reply to that. It wasn’t his fault and I was being nasty to him.
“I’m sorry, I know it’s not your fault I’m here, I just have no one else to vent to.”
“That’s ok.”
“They revived me in this concrete prison without me even wanting it, and then threaten to assimilate me if I escape. How do you keep sane around here?”
“You won’t understand.”
He wasn’t impressed by my anger. And why would he? He’s so wise and old, he’s beyond anger.
“Tell me, because I sure need some sanity these days.”
“It’s an old Buddhist saying I tell myself every day.”
“Buddhist? You?”
“After your time, when economies collapsed, more people started to get interested in that.”
“So what do you say?”
He turned serious.
“Well?” I pressed him.
“I shall grow old, get sick and die. I can't escape aging, sickness and death. Everything I said or did is my sole responsibility. Everybody I know and cherish will fade away in time. Everything is connected. Everything changes. Control is an illusion.”
I was overwhelmed.
“It’s the most depressing saying I've ever heard.”
“It’s relieving if you think about it.”
“I don't think so.”
“Trust me, it works.”
“You know, I just thought I’d grow up to do something more important. In the real world.”
“This is the real world now and storytelling is important. You pass on knowledge and morals to the kids so when they grow up they don’t screw everything up like we did.”
“Stories didn't seem to help us not screw things up.”
“Well, it’s too late for us. But when these people will come out to the surface, they will be smarter.”
“If they come out.”
“Listen, you can go to pre-training or basic training and learn everything from the start. Then you can get retested ten years from now just to become somebody who sits in front of a computer all day and manages a quantum system. Sounds exciting, right?” He asked, sarcastically.
“But at least I'll be doing something that helps people, like security or technical stuff.”
“I don't know what to tell you. Quantum computers or not, you'll be still sitting in front of a screen monitoring the systems like three hundred years ago. They don't let you monitor the systems from inside the simulation for the obvious reasons.”
I sighed. I felt like I was a burden on Isaac and this city because I didn't fit in. I had to be explained everything like a child. I wasn’t even physically fit to be a guard.
“Anyway, I came here to tell you something else entirely.”
“Now what?”
“President Padma wants to meet you. I think she has another job for you.”
Excitement started tingling in my chest.
“Just ask yourself this,” he added, “do you want to directly affect people or do you want to affect the systems that affect people?”
Chapter 7
I sat in a waiting room outside the president's office. It was built inside the inner ring of the city. The waiting room was much nicer than the grey corridor. The concrete was painted white and had majestic looking illustrations on it. I sat there for quite awhile, while a security camera remained fixed on me. I assumed they had cameras to monitor everybody around the city. I bet if they detected anger in your simulation they would follow you outside to make sure you didn’t act stupid.
A girl wearing yellow overalls came in the waiting room. She looked at the closed door and then at me. For a split second I swear she looked like Hadar, but then again I knew I couldn’t yet fully trust my mind. She had brown hair that was held by a rubber band or some future thingy. She had a darker skin tone than me and light green eyes, high cheekbones and full lips. I didn't know why, but I started to get nervous.
“Hi,” she said, smiling.
“Hi,” I said.
“Are you here for the president?”
“Yes I have an appointment.”
Appointment? She's not a doctor. Why was I nervous?
“Cool.”
“Can you talk slower? I am still not used to your speed.”
“Oh...”
Her face lit in the most beautiful way, like she was expecting to see me or something. I felt welcomed by her smile.
“…you are the soldier.”
“Yes,” I admitted.
She sent her hand for a shake and I shook her arm like Isaac taught me.
“What's your name?” She asked.
“Roy.”
“Roy? I never heard that name before. Didn’t they give you a new name?”
“Who was supposed to?”
“I don't know, someone that handles new names. Defrosties always have new names.”
“Actually I only met three people so far, not including the doctors.”
“Ha, I heard about that. Was it scary at the beginning?”
“Yup.”
“So, It's up to me to find you a new name,” she said.
“I don’t really want a new one.”
“Don’t worry I’ll find you a new one after I get to know you.”
She wanted to get to know me?
“So how did it feel to die?”
Wow, that was blunt.
“I was frozen the whole time. I don't know.”
“No, at the moment you were killed, how did it feel?”
She was so direct it made me uneasy. It was like she was interrogating me.
“I don't remember.”
“Try.”
“Why?”
“I am interested. I never asked a former soldier how it was to die.”
“I don't want to remember that moment.”
“Why, isn't it interesting?”
“I didn't want to die and if I remember it, it will hurt again.”
“So? You're here now. It can’t hurt you.”
“It will because I lost family and friends…”
“Then I will be your friend, is that ok?”
“Well, yeah. You didn't tell me your name.”
“It’s Shanta.”
“Shanta, like Shanti?”
“Quite similar, have you heard it before?”
“I just know the word.”
“It means ‘Peaceful.’ What does ‘Roy’ mean?”
“It's a biblical name, meaning 'My Shepherd'.”
She started giggling.
“Shepherd? Like sheep? Who is your Shepherd?”
“God, I guess.”
She giggled more.
“Why are you laughing?”
“I imagine god is holding you on a leash, shepherding you while you eat grass.”
“That's not what a shepherd does. Didn’t they teach you that in school?”
“They teach us about climate and technology and ethics and whatever we need to survive. Not about old times name meanings.”
“You don't study the bible?”
She giggled again.
“We do, we study that religions helped to destroy the world.”
“I thought it was pollution and heat.”
“Yeah, but religions made people blind to the truth.”
I didn’t know what to say about that. It wasn’t a time for a debate.
The door opened and two guards with dark blue overalls came out and greeted Shanta. The president then came out.
“Mom, the soldier is here to see you,” she said.
Mom??? I just had a talk with the president's daughter and made a total fool out of myself?
“Again, nice to meet you Roy.”
“Nice to meet you.”
We shook arms and she was pleasant.
“So I see that you already met Shanta. Do you mind if she comes in with us? I invited her to get to know you.”
So it wasn't a coincidence she was here, and so friendly.
“Sure.”
&nbs
p; We all went inside and sat on little couches that looked like they were made of thick plastic-like fabric. There were four screens on the wall displaying different graphs and numbers. On the other side of the room was a window that showed a view of the coastline.
“This is…normal,” I said, pointing around the room.
“I try to keep my room as simple as I can so I can concentrate.”
“Is that a real window?”
“No that's just a screen showing me the view from any security camera I choose. I like to be reminded of the outside.”
“Nice.”
“So let’s start anew shall we? Tell me a little bit about yourself.”
“I don't know where to start.”
“Anywhere will be fine.”
“So my name is Roy, but Shanta told me that I need to get a new name. I am 19, or 319 depending on how you calculate it.”
They giggled a bit, though it was an awful corny joke they've must have heard a thousand times from people like me.
“I was born in Tel Aviv and you know, I feel that if I start talking about my past I'll just start crying again so I'd rather not.”
“That's understood. Let me tell you a little bit about myself and this place. I've been president of Knaan for over twenty years now. This place is a miracle. Everything here is designed to be self-sustainable until we can go back to living outside. But this sustainability is delicate. Everything has a part to play. For example, there mustn’t be violence and friction between people. Also, there mustn’t be an over consumption of resources. That's why everything is regulated and automated by our systems. “
“I see.”
“Like I said yesterday, I consider all residents my own children. So the most important thing I can say to you is try to fit in as well as you can. Find your place and play along with others. If you get that, you'll feel at home again and everything will be just wonderful for you.”
She looked at Shanta and smiled, “That's why I asked Shanta to guide you and welcome you.”
But how do I make her like me for real?
“Thank you, I intend to do the best I can to find my place. But when I went to get tested—”
“—say no more. Another reason I invited you here was to offer you a special job only few can do. I feel that this might be something you will be perfect for.”
No laundry? No toilets? No way!