His eyes are much older than Silas’s. Though I’m almost certain he doesn’t age as humans, there are creases next to his eyes. My mother always called them smile lines, but now I wonder how much of that is true. His strength, as he holds me down, is incomparable to a mortal such as myself.
“You know Kutz and David are in the next room,” I remind him. “A simple scream might send you back to Hell where you belong.”
His smile broadens. “You’re close enough to age. Can’t handle me yourself?”
I stare into his menacing eyes. It’s then I notice the true difference between him and his son. Silas has a hint of humanity in his eyes. There’s caring there, even love. There’s nothing of the sort in Damius’s eyes. They are cold, despite burning lime green. All I see is emptiness.
“Silas would kill you for hurting me,” I say.
He chuckles. “Emma, you’re letting your näivety show. My son is a demon and will one day show his true colors. Even a pretty girl such as yourself won’t prevent that. Just as you can’t deny your bloodline, neither can he.”
“You’re wrong.”
“Let’s say I am. I know you become of age in a couple of months. And if you don’t kill him, I certainly will. No son of mine is destined to live a life as a puny human, and I’ll destroy him myself if I must. He’s an embarrassment.”
“What do you want from me?” I finally manage to ask.
His face comes closer to mine, and I feel his hot breath on my mouth as he whispers. “You have no idea who you are, do you?”
“I’m Emma.”
He shakes his head. “You’re more than that.”
“I don’t understand. Why are you taunting me? Why not just kill me now? Nothing is stopping you.”
He cocks his head. “Nothing except my position.”
“I don’t understand.”
He laughs. “Of course you don’t. You’re young and don’t understand politics. Yes, even we deal with it. As of now, I’m Lucifer’s right hand, but many demons feel they can replace me. So it’s time I remind them just who they are dealing with.”
“I don’t understand. How does killing me help you?”
He smiles. “You’ll know when you find out who you really are. For now I just want one thing. Scream.”
I don’t hesitate. “Kutz! David!” A smiling Damius fades back into the darkness and disappears. Kutz is the first to burst through my door as I sit up in bed, rubbing my shoulders. I quickly flick the lamp back on as Kutz flips the overhead light on upon entering.
“What is it?” he asks.
“Damius.”
“He was here?” David asks, rushing into the room now.
I nod. “Yeah, he was.”
Kutz sits on the edge of the bed. “Did he hurt you?”
“No. It wasn’t like that. He was just taunting me. He’s planning something. I’m guessing something big.”
“Why do you say that?” David asks.
“He kept talking about Silas being a disappointment. He said Silas would show me his ‘true colors’ soon enough, and if he doesn’t…Damius plans to kill him himself. But he knows too much for that to be all he wants. He knows when my birthday is and that I’ll be of age.”
I hear David gulp. Kutz places his hand on my shoulder. “Emma, Damius’s job is to mislead you, to manipulate you and bring you down. It’s easier to control you when you’re vulnerable. He’s just trying to break you down.”
I shake my head as he speaks. “No, I’m telling you with every fiber of my being, something is coming, and soon.”
Kutz peeks up to David and I watch their eyes meet in fear, though Kutz hides his a bit better than David.
“Emma, you need to be specific. What did Damius say?”
“I told you everything,” I mutter. “Like I said before, he was just taunting me. Maybe you’re right and he’s just trying to break me down. But there’s a reason he’s trying to do that.” I don’t tell them what he said about me. There’s no point. I’m not sure what he meant, but what’s important is that he knows where we are and can come and go as he pleases.
“Like what?”
I shake my head slightly. “I don’t know.”
“Would Micah know?” David asks.
I scoff. “If he knows anything, he won’t tell me.”
“Why do you say that?” David asks.
I roll my eyes. “I just know him.”
Kutz and David both chuckle. “What?” I ask. Now they are laughing at me, of all things. Figures.
“It’s just you talk about him so cavalierly,” David says.
“You don’t see how lucky you are, Emma,” Kutz joins in. “You have allies on all sides: family, demons, angels, Huntsmen. We’re all going to be okay, I assure you. Especially you. You’re well protected.”
“If Damius had wanted to silence me tonight, he could have,” I remind them. The thought of it sends chills up my back that radiate through my whole body. I came so close to being his next victim. Had he wanted me, I know he could have had me.
Once Kutz and David try their best to calm me, they leave to return to their chess match, and I lie in bed with the lamp still on. “I know you’re there,” I say.
“Always,” Micah agrees. There is a certain amount of relief when I hear his voice. As upset as I get with him, his voice is so kind. But today there’s more to be said than I’m sure he will like.
“You took my mother. You knew I had just gotten her back.”
“It’s not for me to decide how and when someone passes. You understand,” he concludes.
I sit up in bed, finally meeting his eyes. “No, I’m not sure I do. Why would I reconnect with my mom only to hear her be killed and ripped away from me?”
Micah ducks his head. “Perhaps that’s why you reconnected. So you’d once again have fond memories before her time was up.”
I shake my head. “You have a way of twisting things that disgusts me, you know?”
He sits on the bed and places his cool hand to my cheek. “Emma, don’t you see how much I care for you? I could be anywhere in the world, and if I hear your voice, my place will always be with you.”
“I don’t understand.”
He hangs his head, dropping his hand from my face. “Don’t you see what you do to me? I’ve been fighting my own demons as I watch over you. There are times I simply watch you sleep to make sure you stay safe.”
“Then where were you five minutes ago?” I retort.
“Here. I knew his intentions weren't to hurt you. Emma, I’d never let anything to happen to you.” He leans in slightly. He’s so beautiful. His chocolate eyes seem more hypnotizing than ever before. I instinctively lean forward, too. His cheek grazes against mine, and his lips find my cheek. My eyes close to his cool touch.
His presence, no matter how much I fight against it, can be so overwhelming. Just as he said it could. His lips fall to meet my chin and he kisses me again before falling to the crease between my neck and shoulders. My body loosens as his hand holds my cheek, and lips find their way up my neck once more. He stops, placing his forehead to mine, and I can feel his cool breath. It’s so steady, as if nothing has happened at all.
“Micah,” I whisper.
“Shh,” he instructs. In one swoop, the angel that had tried to rescue me from this life is now kissing me, his cool lips massaging mine with his own. But as soon as they do, I come back to my senses and push him away.
“I can’t Micah. You can’t! This is wrong.”
“Emma, please. If you knew…” his voice trails off.
“What?”
“I could be like you by tomorrow. A mortal, and I could take care of you.”
I shake my head. “You wouldn’t begin to know how, Micah. And you know how I feel about Silas. I can’t do this to him. He wouldn’t do it to me.”
“Can you honestly be sure of that?” he asks.
“Micah, you might know him even better than I do. What do you think?” He swallows and
his head hangs. “Exactly.
“I’m not willing to give him up, and I’m not willing to let you give up who you are. I need you as you are. If you care about me at all you’ll understand.”
He stands and folds his hands together. “I’ll try to.” Without another word, he, too, fades from my sight and I’m alone once more. Although I know him well enough to know he’s not far away if I need him. I sleep well tonight knowing that, and knowing Kutz and David are just a holler away. But before I fade off to sleep I’m reminded of what Damius told me. I have no idea who I am.
Nineteen
Fighting Fire with Fire
My father called me earlier. He’s having to prepare for my mother’s funeral tomorrow. I sit on the couch, knees pulled to my chest, biting my nails. I thought it would be years and years before I had to worry about burying one of my parents. And today, I can’t even be there to help my father with the arrangements.
They say the funeral will be graveside only. No viewing or church ceremony — only a small get-together and preacher and a casket. I try to think of what my mother would have wanted, but I suppose I didn’t know her well enough to decide, which only makes me sadder.
“Emma!” Silas calls out, bursting through the door.
“I’m here. I’m okay.” He’s near hysterics when he gets to me. I imagine Kutz and David have told him about the attack. Just one more thing for him to worry about.
He throws his arms around me as Kutz and David file into the room. “Where were you when my father got to her? You’re supposed to be protecting her!” he exclaims.
“Silas,” I say, “it’s not their fault. Your father is cunning. As soon as I screamed, they were there.”
“Why didn’t you scream right away?” he asks.
I shake my head. “I’m not sure. I was terrified. I didn’t understand what was happening at first, and once I did it was like another part of me took over. I wanted to keep him talking. I thought maybe I could learn something.”
Silas’s eye grow wide. “Emma, this isn’t a game. What did you think you could learn?”
“I thought maybe I could find out what kind of danger we’re in or what he wanted from us.”
“Did you?” he asks.
I glance to Kutz and David who have now sat nearby in chairs. Kutz gives me a single nod. “I think he’s planning something. Something big. He acted like he was trying to warn me about you…in a sadistic sort of way,” I mumble the last.
“Warn you about me?” Silas asks.
I open my mouth to speak but find no words.
“He’s just taunting her,” Kutz finally says. “I think he enjoys his mind games.”
Silas’s eyes fall. “I’m sorry, Emma. I should have been here to protect you.”
“You can’t be everywhere at once,” I tell him. “Soon I’ll be able to take care of myself.” As soon as the words leave my lips I regret them. I shouldn’t have brought it up. It’s the elephant in the room now anytime I am around Silas.
Neither of us know what will happen when I’m of age, but we both know what we fear. We fear separation and the obvious, of course — my wanting to kill him. As I stare at him now, I can’t imagine ever wanting to hurt him. Instead, all I can picture is wanting to put my arms around him and have him hold me forever.
“Kutz, David, you two can get back to what you were doing,” I tell them. “I need to speak with Silas alone.”
As they leave the room, Silas puts his arm around me and we lean back on the sofa. I bury my face in his side, inhaling his cologne, and let out a deep sigh. “I’ve missed you. I don’t think we’ve ever been able to be this comfortable and open with one another — your arm around me, holding me. It’s all I’ve wanted for a long time,” I admit.
“Me, too,” he says before kissing my forehead. “I’ve never been able to hold anyone like this before. I’ve never wanted to until now. I care so much for you, Emma,” he whispers. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”
“I’ll be fine. We all will.” As he holds me, my mind races. I still can’t shake the feeling that something big is going to happen. Why would his father keep paying us visits pretending to attack us but not actually doing so?
I’m not dim. I know had Damius wanted to hurt me last night, he could have. He probably could have silenced me immediately and no one in the other rooms would have been the wiser. Instead he spared me. Why?
“Silas,” I say, now recognizing part of the problem. “He counted on me telling everyone.”
“What are you talking about?” he asks, sitting up.
“Don’t you see? He knew I would tell everyone. Obviously he wants you to know that he can find us anywhere. He wants us all to know, and he’s enjoying it. Kutz was right, he’s taunting me. But not just me, all of us. And he’s visiting because he wants to know what he’s up against. He told me last night he wanted to hear me scream, and I did.
“I hollered for Kutz and David. So now he knows about us, my father, and your brother and David. He wants to know how many of us there are. We need more people — people he won’t know about.”
Silas stares at me. “How will we find more people?”
“We have to call my father.”
* * *
When my father returns, he walks in a broken manner - head hung low, barely able to drag one foot in front of the other. He eases up the walk as I peek at him through the curtains. My heart begins to break.
I’ve never seen my father so undone, so untidy, and so sad. Guilt washes over me like water as I realize I haven’t given what he’s feeling a single thought until now. I’ve been obsessing over myself. Still, my father needs to know what’s happening. Unfortunately, the problems haven’t stopped because my mother passed.
“Dad,” I say softly as he enters.
“Em,” he whispers, but rushes to me, scooping me up in a hug. I can’t remember the last time we hugged like this. I must have been a child. Tears swell in my eyes as I hold on to this man who is only a shell of his former self.
“Dad,” I whisper with a bit of hesitation. “We all…well, we have to talk.” He releases me and wipes the tears away with the back of his hand. “It’s Damius. He was here last night.”
“What?” my father exclaims. “Are you okay? He knows we’re here?”
I’m lost for words for a moment but I give my head a slight shake. “Dad, we can’t hide from him. It’s just not possible.”
“What do you mean?”
“Because of what he is, Dad.”
“Mr. Lester,” Silas finally says, letting his presence be known. “You can’t hide from him, sir. Damius is a right hand to Lucifer, an archdemon. Like angels, they can find you anywhere.”
“Why didn’t you tell us this before?” Dad demands.
“I wasn’t sure until now. None of us were,” he answers, glancing at Kutz. “We knew it was a possibility, but not a definite.”
“There’s more, Dad. We think that he’s planning something. Something big. Think about it, Dad. He could have hurt Mom before we arrived, but he didn’t. He knew when we arrived and could have left then, but he waited. He waited for us to climb those stairs and enter that room. We think he may be fishing for information. He wants to know how many of us there are, and unfortunately there aren’t many.”
“Why would he need to know that?” he asks.
“Sir, my father, Damius, well, we think he must be planning some of sort of attack. And the fact that the Huntsmen are now split in two will only make an attack or battle easier for them.”
“What are you trying to tell me?” my father asks.
Silas peeks at me and I take a deep breath. “We think he wants to wage war against the Huntsmen but he’s content now with just our group. We don’t know if he’s gone after the other member of the group or not.”
“Why wouldn’t he just attack now? He knows we’re broken,” my dad reminds us.
“My father’s kind draws strength from fear,” Silas points out
. “The more scared you are, the more powerful he is. It’s as simple as that.”
“I’m not sure how to fight someone like that,” Dad says. “All my years of training, everything I’ve learned, seem useless when it comes to protecting my own family. I’m not sure I even know where to begin anymore.”
“We have to find others,” I blurt out. Silas glances at me, as do Kutz and David, who have now joined us.
“Others? I can’t just grab Huntsmen from all corners of the country to fight. I wouldn’t begin to know how to start.”
There’s now another elephant in the room. No one wants to say it, and as I peer around the room, my eyes finally rest on Kutz, who takes a step forward. “Sir, we don’t need more Huntsmen. We were thinking more like fighting fire with fire.”
My father’s face is twisted in confusion, but suddenly realization spreads across it as his face draws down. “You mean more of your kind,” he says.
“Yes, sir.”
My father laughs nervously, taking a step back and wiping his hand down his face. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“Mr. Lester, this is our only chance at stopping whatever it is my father has planned,” Silas says in a gentle voice, trying his best not to overload my father. My dad turns and opens the curtains with one swift motion, letting a beam of light tear through the room. I squint against it, having been in the dark for so long.
“I guess there’s no need to keep these drawn closed then,” my father mutters under his breath. He places his hands on his hips as he stares out the window. “Tell me what to do, Laura,” I hear him whisper to himself. After a few moments of deafening silence,my father turns to us all. “So, what are you waiting for?”
“Sir?” Silas asks.
“Summon them, or whatever you need to do.”
Now it’s Silas’s face that twists in confusion before he realizes what he is saying. “Sir, there’s no way for us to do that. Just as you don’t know where every human is, we don’t know where every half-breed is.”
“What are we supposed to do then?” my father asks in exhaustion.
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