“What? Why do you say that?” I mean, it was true, but I thought I had hidden it pretty well.
“Well, for starters you hardly looked at him all night.”
“How does that translate to being hung up?”
“Do you know how much effort it takes not to look at someone, especially when they are only four people in the room? It’s tough! Cameron noticed some other stuff too. Anyway, on the way home, he was all sad about you being into someone else. Cameron was saying how hard it was to find nice, normal, smart girls in L.A.”
Yeah, I could just imagine him spinning out this reel: the misunderstood artist looking for a little stability and a real woman. “So you got with him?”
Sofia looked over at me, hugely relieved that I didn’t seem to be upset. “Well no, I didn’t have sex with him. But we made out. So Frankie, you’re okay with this?”
“I think Cameron is a lucky guy to be with someone like you. And rid of a head-case like me!”
“Oh Frankie, I’m so relieved. He’s been calling and asking me out, but I’ve felt so guilty. Now I can go. And he’s such a good artist.” She sighed happily.
“He is.” It was funny, but competence was such a turn-on in a guy. For some it would be artists, for others hockey players. I pulled out my notebook, and made a note.
“What are you doing? Writing me off as a friend?” Sofia laughed.
“No, are you kidding? You’re letting me live with you, that’s true friendship. I’m writing a reminder to call Cameron and arrange to return the painting he lent me. I can also apologize for not being fair to him, but I don’t really have to worry since he’s traded up!”
But even as I was trying to forget about Jake, I started hearing from him more than ever before. At first it started with texts.
Then it escalated to phone calls.
“Hey Frankie,” Jake sounded nervous. Good.
“Jake.”
“How are you?”
“Fine. What do you want?”
“Well, I was wondering, if you’d like to go to the game this Saturday? We’re playing the Canucks, I know you like to see the Canucks. I could get you two tickets and you could bring Sylvia.”
“Sofia.”
“Yeah, sorry. And we could go out for dinner afterwards.”
“I’m already going to the game,” I told him coldly. He was so obvious, thinking that hockey was some aphrodisiac for me. The guy had no clue about what made me tick.
“Oh, you are? Are you meeting Bauer?” Jake sounded pissed, and that made me smile.
“No, I’m going with Bianca. There’s a Canucks fan trip, so I’ll be sitting with the Canucks fans.”
Jake sighed, and there was a long silence.
“Frankie, I really want to see you. Do you want to go out Sunday? We could go out for dinner.”
“Jake, what’s the point?”
“The point is that I want to see you. Can’t we at least talk about stuff?”
Now I sighed. I didn’t want to sound like a Doris Day movie, but unless he was ready to commit, why should I see him?
“Look, I don’t really see why we should meet now. Do you know what you want?”
“I want to see you. I don’t have some big plan like you always do, but we could talk about stuff.”
That wasn’t unreasonable, but I really didn’t want to get involved again for nothing.
“I’ll think about it. If I want to get together, I’ll call you.”
And then I hung up. I figured I had waited around long enough for him, and he could wait for me for a change.
Seeing Bianca again was fantastic. I had some great new friends, but there’s nothing like having an old friend around who gets you. We couldn’t really get into my complicated love life with her dad around, but it was reassuring just to see her in person. The game was absolutely crazy, there were a ton of Canucks fans there, and it was almost like a Canucks home game. And once the Canucks started winning, the visiting crowd got even louder.
Naturally I was watching Jake, and he wasn’t having a very good game. After one of the twins scored with Jake kind of lying on top of the Kings goalie, Jake threw a total fit at the ref.
“What’s his problem?” I asked Bianca.
She was watching the replay, “It looks like he thinks he got crosschecked, but really it wasn’t that hard. Nothing compared to what Cookson does all game long.” She was in game mode, so Jake became another enemy player and not someone she had gone to dinner with.
To add to his great night, Jake took a diving penalty, then he accidentally tipped in an empty net goal for the Canucks, and at the very end of the game, after yelling at the refs, he got a 10-minute misconduct. Before I moved out, I used to watch some of his games on TV, and I thought he was getting pretty emotional out there.
“I don’t really get why Jake acts like that.” I told Bianca and her dad, as we walked out amid the drunk and ecstatic Canucks fans and the glowering Kings fans.
Her dad shrugged, “The Canucks assistant coach once said, ‘To be a man on the ice, you must be a man off the ice.’” Coming from Mr. Leung, in his clipped Chinese accent, that sounded like Confucian wisdom.
Jake
I missed Frankie even before her taxi was out of sight. And it wasn’t all about the food like she thought; it was Frankie’s energy that I missed. Even when she was asleep, it was like she was this happy little ball of energy in the house.
Every time I walked in, it felt the same. Like something was missing. I couldn’t help it; I kept trying to get in touch with her. I found stuff around the house that belonged to her, and I tried to get her to meet up to get it. I invited her to a game, but she was already going. And I finally just asked her out, and she said she was going to think about it. But then she never called me back.
Domer was cool. After telling me off the first time, he never said another word. I guess he could tell that I was bugged or maybe he figured it was pointless to argue. We went back to eating pasta, BBQ, and take out food, and we never mentioned Frankie at all.
I had no idea where Frankie might be sitting at the hockey game, and it turned out to be pretty tough to figure out since there were a ton of Canucks fans at the game. If she were wearing my jersey, it would have been easier, but since she was mad at me, I figured that probably wasn’t happening. So I gave up looking for her and focussed on the game.
After a crappy loss to Vancouver, I was ready to go out. Maybe I got too frustrated; I ended up taking a stupid diving penalty and then a misconduct at the end of the game. But I was already pissed about not getting a call on their second goal, which turned out to be the game winner. Anyway, it was time to leave that crap at the rink and have a night out with the boys. It was an early game, so we could go out for dinner first and then hit some clubs.
We were having a good time, and I was dancing with this chick, she was older and she was already talking pretty dirty to me. I didn’t know if I wanted to leave with her or not, I figured I’d decide later. It didn’t feel quite right though. There was no question that Frankie was way better looking than pretty much everyone in the club.
When I went to the can for a piss, Link was just finishing up. As he washed his hands, I saw him looking at me in the mirror, and he didn’t look too impressed.
“What’s up?” I asked him.
“What’s with the chick you’re out there with? She’s kinda ancient, isn’t she?”
“No big deal. One night, and she seems pretty kinky.”
He shrugged. “It’s your life.”
I felt kinda pissed; Link had scored a ton of skanks, so how come he was lecturing me? “At least I get pussy, you are a pussy.”
“Fuck you, Co
okie. I knew that was what you thought. But you know what?” He surprised me by laughing. “I’m happy now. I feel good all the time, no highs and lows anymore. Like before, when I woke up, I’d be hurting and I didn’t know where the fuck I was, I didn’t know who the fuck the chick beside me was, and I’d feel so shitty. But I’d do it again, to feel the high again.”
“I’m not like that. I don’t feel shitty about doing stuff I enjoy.”
“I guess it’s just me, then. Do what you want,” he said and turned away. But with one hand on the door, he turned back and said, “It’s better, Cookie. Being with someone special, it’s better than a different chick every night. I know, because I’ve done both!”
64. Breakfast at Tiffany’s
Jake
“So, what’s the best way to make things up to a girl?”
I was playing cards on the plane with Duper, Lovey, and Link. I hadn’t heard from Frankie before we left on a weeklong road trip, and I figured that I could use all the advice I could get.
“Flowers, for sure. Chicks love flowers,” Duper offered up.
“Depends what you’ve done,” said Lovey. “If it’s big, you might need a Kobe Special.” Yeah right, I wasn’t spending $4 mil on a ring, even if that was possible.
“Are we talking about that blonde you brought to Roady’s party?” Link wondered.
I shook my head. “No, it’s Frankie.”
“Frankie? I didn’t even know you guys were back together.” Link looked puzzled. “She’s really nice. But how can she avoid forgiving you, since you guys live together?”
“She moved out,” I explained, not wanting to get into the whole confusing situation.
“Then it’s going to take more than flowers, defs jewellery,” Duper said. “You need to apologize and tell her how wonderful she is, ‘Oh baby, you’re so fantastic and I’m such a d-bag, I’m not worthy of you!’” He started snickering, and Lovey gave him a disgusted look.
“If you’re going to give her a gift, make it something she’d really love,” Lovey suggested. “Something unique that shows you really get her.”
I sighed. He was right, but I had no clue what that was.
When we came back from the road trip, I should have been flying. We went four for four on the road, and were gearing up for the playoffs. The flight home had been a great time, and as Domer and I drove home, it was late enough that there was no traffic at all. Smooth sailing, until we got home.
When we walked in the door, the place smelled stale. I walked into the kitchen, and it was the same mess we had left there on Tuesday. There were no cookies and only expired milk in the fridge.
Domer went right to bed, and I got ready to crash too. I walked by Frankie’s room, which was all neat and tidy… and empty. I hadn’t been in there since she left, and I went inside. I lay down on her bed and then I could still smell her. She smelled so pretty all the time, like a girl should. I closed my eyes, and I could remember everything. I hadn’t even known her for a year, and it seemed like she had been such a big part of my life already.
I thought about the first time we had sex in Vancouver, and all the great sex we had here. Was that what it was all about for me? Wanting to still have sex with different women? But I had to admit that the sex I had with Frankie was incredible. Maybe fucking Aspen was more like porn sex, but with Frankie not only was the fucking good, but afterwards was great. We’d lie there and talk and joke around, and then do it again. She always told me how great it was with us, and I got off on that. I never exactly got why Frankie liked me, but I knew she liked me a lot. And she had denied it, but maybe she even loved me. I kind of felt like I didn’t deserve that.
Why was Frankie different? For sure, I didn’t meet a lot of chicks that were into food like she was. Or if they were, it was in a snobby way, like wanting to be taken to the latest restaurant. And Frankie was full of surprises: I never knew if she was going to get mad at me or laugh stuff off, and even how crazy she could be in bed. Plus, there was the way that she seemed to be into me for me. Not for hockey, which I still wasn’t sure she even liked, and not for money, which she seemed not to care about at all. No matter what the guys said, I didn’t think that expensive jewellery would do it for her.
I really liked my life in L.A., and I was having a great time here. The guys would come over and hang out, and I liked being with the team. I liked to party, but maybe even the best part of that was being out with the guys. I figured there would be a time, way in the future, that I’d want to settle down. And probably Frankie would be the type of girl I’d like to find then. But that was not now, not by a long shot. I didn’t want to be 40 years old and regretting that I passed up partying with hot chicks when I was young and famous. Being a famous hockey player brought you a ton of opportunities, and any guy would be nuts to pass them up. Sometimes, it felt like everything was temporary and it would be gone in no time. I was into today, and not worrying about tomorrow.
Frankie was so steady and loyal. To me, she was kinda the girl next door, so like in the movies you go home at the end, and there she’d be. I had this idea that she would stick around and wait for me. I had tested her, and maybe pushed her away and done some stupid things, but she still seemed to care about me. If I was able to say that I was on the same page as her, I was pretty sure she’d come back to me. From the way Bear was acting, I figured she had dumped him. For some dumb reason, she was into me, and just me. But the longer she was gone and the longer she didn’t call me back, the more I wondered about this. Frankie was here in L.A., right now, but not for much longer. I still wasn’t 100% into this relationship stuff, but I figured if we could just talk, we could work something out.
As I lay there, I noticed that something was on the top shelf of the closet. I got up and had a look. Neatly folded in the corner was the Kings jersey I gave her and she made into a dress. Shit. That was the only real gift I gave her, and she had given it back. Did that mean she didn’t see a time when she’d ever need the jersey again? Maybe she was done waiting for me.
Our first home game back was a complete disaster. Not sure exactly why, but nobody was on their game. We hardly even got any shots, and St. Louis ended up beating us 4-0. Our own fans were booing us, and the mood was pretty low in the room afterwards. I was ready to go out and get totally wasted.
My cell rang in the middle of the night, and I woke up absolutely certain that my mom was calling from Vancouver to tell me that my dad had had a heart attack. He was a Type A stress case. I don’t know why I had this very specific premonition, but I wasn’t exactly thinking straight, and I grabbed the phone in that middle-of-the-night panic.
“Hello!”
“Frankeeee!”
What? Not my mom, but a familiar voice and I felt relieved. “Is that you, Jake?”
“Yesh! It is meeee! Hello Frankeeee!”
“Jake, do you know what time it is?”
“Time? Well, I haff no fucking idea, but… “ his voice trailed away from the phone and then returned, “ … it is dark out. So night time!”
“It’s like 3:00 in the morning, why are you calling me?”
“Well Frankeeee, hey, y’know, you have a reelly great name. Frankee. Frankeee. Great.” He burped happily.
I debated hanging up.
“Frankeee, I was wandering, did you, y’know, make up your mind about seeing me yet?”
“You’re drunk dialling me in the middle of the night to see if I wanted to get together with you? Well, that pretty much decides things. No. Nyet. No way.”
“Eees that a no?”
“Yes.”
“Oh grrreat, a yes.”
“No, I said yes to it being a no.”
There was a short silence. “Frankeee, I am a leetle drunk. So you are not making complete thense to me.”
“Jake, forget this. Let’s just talk in the morning. So I can tell you no then and you’ll understand it.”
“But Frankeee, if I wait until I’m thober, I won’t be able to tel
l you how much I miss you.”
“What?”
“I miss you. I miss you in the morning and that other time, y’know… the after-morning. And at night. I miss you all night! Mr. Whitesnake misses you too! I want you to come back and live wif us… please Frankeee, come back.”
I didn’t even know if “us” meant Jake and Luke, or Jake and Mr. Whitesnake. I wasn’t fully functioning either. “Look Jake, let’s just have dinner and talk. Then we’ll see about anything else.”
“Okay, would you like to haf dinner now? Shit, I am pretty hungry right now!”
“No, not now.”
“Tomorrow!”
“Okay, tomorrow. But are you even going to remember that you called in the morning?”
“I will write mythelf a message on my hand. No… on my arm, in case I wash my hands. Wha’ time?”
“Seven?”
“Seven! I am writing ‘dinner with Frankeee at 7’ on my arm.”
“Okay, good night Jake.”
“Oh wait, I wanna to pay you a compliment. Duper thaid that chicks love that shit.”
“Not necessary, let’s just….”
“No! Let me thay… you are beyoutiful! So be-you-ti-ful! And… you have great tits, possibly the greatest tits ever! Do you remember Athpen? Her tits were fake, and they never moved, y’know, like gravity didna apply to them! Your tits bounce all the time, they are grrrreat. And they feel soft, like y’know, giant marshmallows and when I….”
“Jake! Stop! That’s enough.”
“Okay. I will thee you tomorrow. At 7:00!”
“Bye.”
“Bye Frankee!”
I put down my cell and started laughing. I laughed so hard, I had to pull a pillow over my head so I didn’t wake up anyone in the house.
The next day, Jake picked me up at work. He looked fine, and not particularly hung-over or anything. Apparently he had a capacity for alcohol honed by years of experience. I giggled a little when I saw the faint ink marks on his arm: Di-n-r w--- Fr—k-e--7.
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