“You are an idiot. I was going to teach him tomorrow.”
“We don’t have time for that. We need to get out into the field. We’re losing too many soldiers as it is.”
“What in the fuck is wrong with you?” Orrean’s angry voice came from the doorway.
I looked over at him, surprised by the amount of anger coming off of him. His eyes were almost glowing, he looked so pissed. After everything we’d been through, I’d never seen him look like that—not once, and I knew he’d been pissed at me before, multiple times, in fact.
“How dare you,” Orrean practically growled, which made my eyes widen even farther.
Hawk helped Bek stand up, but then he backed away from Orrean with his hands up in a show of surrender… I couldn’t really blame him. Orr was terrifying.
But Bek stood tall. “I needed to show him how to make a linhu.”
“There are better ways. You could have come to me. I could have taught him.” Orrean was still growling, though he’d switched to Taoree.
“You told me yourself that he wanted space from you, that you weren’t supposed to be around him,” Bek growled back in Taoree.
Orrean got in Bek’s face. “There are better ways.”
“But not faster. We need to get back out there. There’s too much at stake.”
Orrean pushed Bek so hard that the alien fell on his ass again. Then Orrean bent over and growled quietly, though it somehow seemed even more menacing, “Do not touch my Balu again. If you lay one finger on him, I will come after you. Do you understand?”
“Yes,” Bek said through clenched teeth.
Then he stood up, walked over to me, knelt down and grabbed my hand in his. I almost pulled away, but without a word, Orrean started pushing his light into me and my body started healing immediately. I almost stopped him, but I looked into his eyes and I couldn’t.
He was staring at me, looking so angry, but underneath it all, he looked heartbroken, and I didn’t have it in me to make him stop. His warm energy felt so good, and his purple eyes were so intense that I had to close my eyes so I didn’t get lost in them.
When I was healed, Orrean let go right away and turned to Wes. He covered the little cut on Wes’s shoulder and when he pulled away a few seconds later, the cut was gone. Wes smiled at Orrean and said, “Thank you.”
Orrean nodded, stood and started walking toward the door. Right when he was in the doorway, I called out, “Orrean?”
He looked over his shoulder at me, waiting for me to say something.
Only, I never did.
I meant to say thank you, I meant to say sorry, I meant to tell him that I knew he did the right thing in order to save me and my family… but none of that came out. Instead I just stared at him, silently, unable to say even one of the million things I needed to say to him. After a very long moment, he turned around and walked away. I instantly had to rub at my chest—the pain was intense and the longer it lingered there, the worse it was getting. But I had other shit to deal with right then, so I pushed it away, bottled it up and decided to leave it for later.
I looked over at the other two aliens in the room. “What in the fuck was that about? Why the hell did you attack me like that? Couldn’t you have just told me I had some weird-ass energy shield I could shoot you with, you fucking asshole?”
“Linhu,” Bek had the balls to say.
I yelled in Taoree, “I know what it’s called, you prick. I am fluent in Taoree, remember?” I was fluent—that wasn’t a lie—but ten minutes ago, I hadn’t known what it was called. I mean, how could I, when I didn’t even know it existed? But I wasn’t going to tell him that.
He shrugged. “It was the quickest way to teach you.”
“You’ve got a lot of nerve going after my brother like that, Bek,” Cal yelled, stepping in front of me. “Especially after I saved your ass earlier today.” Wes stood next to my shoulder, looking like he was ready to pounce.
“I wasn’t going to kill him or anything, I knew we could heal those minor injuries.” I snorted at minor injuries since they sure as hell hadn’t felt minor. The Taoree ignored me and argued back, “I needed him to find his linhu so we can teach him how to use it.”
“I don’t care what reason you had for it, Bek, you don’t do shit like that to my family. How do you expect me to trust you when we’re out in the field?” Cal was still yelling.
“I’m sorry, but it was the best way.”
“Obviously not, you bast—”
I put my hand on Cal’s shoulder to cut him off. “It’s okay, Cal. I understand why he did it.”
Cal looked back at me. “No, it’s not okay, J. I spent weeks watching you slowly dying in front of me. It’s not fucking okay.” He looked like he was holding back tears. I knew he was upset because of everything, and I knew he was still hurting because he lost his older brother, but I hadn’t realized how distressed he really was until now.
I put my arm over his shoulder, pulled him close and whispered, “It’s gonna be okay. Let’s hear them out and see what they have to say. If they’re still assholes, we can find another team, alright?” I resisted the urge to pull him into a hug, but only because I knew he was trying to hold it together in front of the Taoree and I didn’t want to make it worse. I’d have to give him a hug later or something… I needed to make sure he was doing okay.
He gave me a nod, then turned back to Bek and Hawk and demanded, “Explain yourselves, or I will report your asses and get you locked up downstairs.” It took me a moment to remember that there was a prison on the bottom floors of the camp, deep underground. I was still learning where everything was.
Hawk started this time, “Jeremy has some of the Taoree Elite qualities because he’s Balu to Orrean. Orrean is from one of the royal bloodlines and they have the ability to use their light in different ways. Jeremy can use his light defensively, as protection and healing. That’s why he can make an onghu—”
“The white dome thingy,” I added so Cal and Wes would know what the guy was talking about, then I waved at Hawk to continue.
“And that’s why he can use his light for linhu… to protect himself and those around him when the time comes. Apparently Bek thought that the best way for him to realize this skill was to beat the shit out of him,” Hawk finished with a shrug.
Cal blew out a slow breath, then he and Wes both turned to me before he asked, “What do you think?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know… I mean, it worked, but it wasn’t exactly a pleasant experience.”
Wes added, “Orrean wouldn’t have left us with them if he thought they were a real danger to us.”
“That’s true. He would’ve killed them and taken us somewhere else safe,” Cal agreed.
Bek stepped forward. “I’m sorry I hurt you. I won’t ever do that again, I swear on my life.” I didn’t know him, but for some reason I felt like he was telling the truth. He tilted his head and slowly examined me as he said, “Can you find the linhu again? Can you feel where it is inside of you? It’s an extension of your onghu.”
I thought about his question as I slowly stepped away from Cal and Wes, and closer to Bek. I focused on my light and felt a small part of it start building up again, waiting to burst out of me. Instead of answering Bek’s question, I let my linhu fly out—it looked like the white dome thing, but smaller and only right in front of me… it reminded me of a shield. My linhu went far enough in front of me that it hit him right in the chest, sending him falling on his ass. Serves him right.
Hawk started chuckling and Bek sat up in a daze, sputtering, “I’ll take that as a yes.”
I smirked at that.
Hawk looked over at me. “Your linhu and your onghu are like a muscle, so you need to keep practicing with them to make them stronger so it takes less energy and you won’t be left as defenseless after you use one of them. I’ll get some weights out and things so you can practice shielding yourself. Though,” he pointed at Bek, “that was a damn good shot.”
&n
bsp; I smiled at him before sending a glare in Bek’s direction. I understood what he was trying to do, but for fuck’s sake, he could’ve tried to get me to find my linhu without beating my ass like he did.
I heard Wes’s whispered voice ask Cal, “Why did Orrean get so tired after he used his onghu if it just takes practice to build it up? Hasn’t he been using it his whole life?”
“Yeah,” Cal whispered back, “but remember Orrean said that because he was undercover, he’d kept his abilities a secret when he was with the Legion. He ended up not using them for years, so he just needs to keep practicing again.”
“Yeah, it’s just weird,” Wes replied.
“Talk to Orrean at dinner if you want.”
I cleared my throat. “You two realize I can hear every word you’re saying, right?”
My brother rolled his eyes at me. “It’s not my fault you’re eavesdropping and being a jerk to Orr.”
I rolled my eyes back and said, “Can you just drop it?”
After a beat, Wes said, “Fine,” and Cal just shrugged at me.
“Where’s Nolan?” I eventually asked as Hawk came out with beanbags, weights, and blocks of wood, setting them up across the room.
“He’s learning about some new tool for the cars… I dunno what it is, but he loves learning that shit, so Orrean set it up for Nol or somethin’, I dunno,” Cal told me.
“Oh… huh.”
“Ready?” Hawk asked.
“Sure.”
He smiled and picked up a beanbag. “Try to keep anything from hitting you. We’ll slowly work up to the heavier stuff.”
I nodded and set to work. It was a weird feeling, but every time I pulled at my light with the intention of guarding myself, it came pretty easily and almost felt like it wanted to make a shield. I sorta felt like a superhero… Well, I did until Hawk started chucking wooden blocks at me and they started making their way past my shield and hitting me in the chest and stomach. I was going to end up with a hell of a lot of bruises. If I’d been talking to Orrean, I could’ve gone to him to heal me.
But I wasn’t going to, even though a big part of me missed the tall jerk.
***
I was sitting by the fence against a tree, just waiting like I usually did, picking at the grass and throwing tiny rocks I found in the dirt. I was bored and annoyed. I mean, why the hell did I keep coming here and just waiting around instead of having normal dreams? Why was I even waiting for that stupid alien, anyway?
“Jeremy?” a whispered voice said.
I startled and looked around for the source, but didn’t see anyone.
“Jeremy?”
I couldn’t tell exactly where it was coming from, but it sounded like maybe it was coming from the other side of the fence. At first I thought it was Orrean, but there was no way his voice could ever sound so… sinister. I stood and walked over to look through the hole in the fence. I could see the round huts on the other side, just like the first time I visited this place, but I didn’t see anyone. There was no movement or flashing lights, either.
“Jeremy?” the hushed voice hissed.
“Hello?” I whispered, suddenly afraid of what I might find when I finally encountered whoever the hell was saying my name. The voice was so soft and strained, I could hardly make it out.
“Jer…e…my,” the spine-chilling voice whispered, making goosebumps pop up all over my skin.
I swallowed thickly and looked around on my side of the fence, but didn’t see anyone, so I looked back through the hole. It was dark over there and very still, not even a breeze to shift the grass. Suddenly my side of the fence went completely still, too, and something in the air changed. My heart started pounding in fear as I slowly backed away from the fence.
“Hello, Jeremy,” the awful voice said from directly behind me.
I turned, but no one was standing there. I kept my back to the fence as I looked out into the trees.
“Oh,” the voice said from the other side of the fence, “did I scare you… Jeremy?”
I turned around, backing away again as a shadow moved across the hole. There was someone… something on the other side of the fence.
Then laughter started echoing around me. Terrible, horrible, bloodcurdling laughter filled the air, and I saw the flash of something black through the hole. An awful screeching sound pierced my ears and the metal fence started ripping to tatters right in front of me.
When a giant fence panel flew backward, I muttered, “Oh fuck.” Then I turned on my heel and started running through the trees.
The laughter followed me, no matter how fast I ran. I felt as if I was being chased by a predator. A big, giant, scary-as-fuck predator. I felt it right behind me. It was going to catch me any second and tear me to shreds. The laughter was right behind me and the creepy voice said, “You’re mine now, Jeremy.”
Then I stumbled and screamed in pain as something sliced down my back. I turned around, ready to fight it off, but the trees around me had disappeared. I was in a field… my field… no, my and Orrean’s field.
My breath caught. “Orrean?”
Orrean was standing in the middle of our field, looking confused and disoriented, but still there. He turned at the sound of his name, looking at me, bewildered. “Jeremy? I don’t… how… how am I here?”
I ignored his question since he was the one that’d told me about dream-walking in the first place, and I ran over to him. Before I could think twice, I threw my arms around his waist and buried my face in his chest, soaking up his scent.
Orrean tentatively put his hands on my shoulders, then gasped. “You’re trembling. What’s wrong?” He wrapped his arms around me and started rubbing my back.
My words came tumbling out, jumbled, and my whole body started shaking even more. “I was at the fence and I heard something saying my name, I thought it was you, but it wasn’t, it was, I don’t know what it was, but I ran and it caught me, but when I turned around it wasn’t there, and it cut my back, and it laughed, and—”
“Hey.” Orrean cut me off by grabbing my cheeks to force me to look at him. “It was just a nightmare. You’re okay.”
I looked up into his dark-purple eyes, blew out a breath and asked, “Are you really here? Are we dream-walking?”
“I… yes, I’m here, but I don’t know how.”
“What? I thought I pulled you to me or something. Isn’t that what you told me before?”
“Well, yes, but I…”
When he trailed off, I realized he still had his arms around me. I thought about pulling away. I knew I should. Staying in his arms felt like a betrayal to Colt. But… but this was only a dream, and after the fucked-up nightmare, there was no way I wanted to be alone. Just being in his presence made a huge part of me settle into place, even when my nerves were frazzled from some imaginary foe.
So instead of pulling away, I moved closer to him, wrapping my arms around his waist and tucking my head under his chin. I took a deep breath, inhaling his cinnamon scent, and I whispered, “Please stay with me tonight.”
He started to pull away. “Jeremy, I—”
I hugged him tighter. “Please, Orr… just for tonight… just here, in this place… please stay with me.”
His shuddered breath ruffled the hair on my head. He whispered, “Okay.”
I nodded against his chest and squeezed him in thanks. His arms wrapped around me, holding me tight and making me feel safe after the crazy nightmare. We stayed that way for a long time. His calm presence soothed my soul.
But I needed more.
So I slid my hands up his chest to his neck, palms flat on his skin, my thumbs rubbing his jaw. Then I leaned up on my toes and pressed my cheek against his. His skin was soft and made me breathe out a sigh at the feel of it against my own. Then I wrapped my arms all the way around his neck and tucked my face against the side of his neck.
Somehow Orrean knew exactly what I wanted because the next thing I knew, he was lifting me so he could sit in the grass with
me in his lap. I didn’t move my upper body, but I straddled his legs. He hugged me tight to him, so our chests were flat against each other, both of us breathing sighs of relief at finally being close together again.
I couldn’t help myself, I needed his scent to fill my lungs completely, so I took deep, full breaths, then nuzzled my face farther into him. He smelled so good, felt so good against me. Having him in my arms, being in his… made my heart feel almost at peace.
My lips lightly brushed the skin under his jaw and we both gasped. I felt a buzz spread all over my skin, down to my toes. So I pressed my lips just under his ear, then farther down his neck, then on his throat, then the other side of his neck. Why did it feel so good, so natural with him? How could it after I lost my love? Why did I want him when I shouldn’t? Was this feeling real, or was it just some stupid byproduct of our connection? My heart was heavy as I kissed under his other ear.
“Hey,” Orrean whispered as he pulled me back to look at him. When he started rubbing my cheeks, I realized I was crying. “It’s okay, Renuella,” he whispered with that sweet, understanding voice.
I squeezed my eyes tight and whispered, “I’m sorry.”
“Shh,” he cooed before kissing my forehead and pulling me back into his chest. He shifted us around until we were lying in the grass against each other with my head on his shoulder and his arms tight around me.
As he slowly rubbed my back, I knew without a shadow of a doubt that he understood. That he knew I still wasn’t ready to embrace him… and I didn’t know if I’d ever be.
Still, he held me and kept me safe for the rest of the night.
When I woke up, I looked around, my empty room feeling so much lonelier than it had when I’d gone to bed alone last night. My chest started throbbing in a painful beat that made it difficult to breathe and my back felt like it was cut. So I grabbed a pillow, pulled it to my chest and pressed my face into it. In that moment I couldn’t tell who I was missing more, Colt or Orrean. But it didn’t matter, because I was fucking lonely.
I knew I could walk across the hall to Orr’s room, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Not when Colt’s beautiful face kept flashing behind my eyes.
Independents: Taoree Trilogy #2 Page 12