by Ava Walsh
“Hey!” he cried out, as she settled into the car. Olivia stuck her head out of the window and looked at him with a smile.
“Thanks, Rufus. That was fun, as always. Goodnight. See you around,” she said, turning the key in the ignition and driving away.
She checked her rearview mirror and saw him still standing there, a look of confusion on his face.
Olivia was happy and upset at the same time. Happy she had had one more night with him, that she had been able to walk away from him before he had had the chance to walk away from her. But she was upset because she still wanted him, and this night hadn’t quenched her thirst for him. If not anything else, at least he didn’t know that. Rufus didn’t have a clue.
Chapter Six
Olivia heard a knock on the door. Frowning, she rushed over to look through the peep-hole. Sophie stood outside in a pinstriped pencil skirt with a neatly ironed shirt tucked into it. A black leather tote hung from the crook of her elbow. She looked like she was ready to head for a meeting.
Olivia opened the door wide and raised her eyebrows at her friend.
“I didn’t know if you were at home or at work. I decided to take a chance,” Sophie said, pushing past her into the apartment.
“I do have work. I have to leave in a couple of hours.” Olivia said, watching Sophie walk over to Maya, who was playing quietly with building blocks in her playpen.
“Hello, missy,” Sophie said, bending down in front of Maya and forcing a smile onto her face. Maya looked up at her with her large, green eyes, and Sophie looked away.
“She’s an awfully quiet child, isn’t she?” Sophie turned to Olivia, who was standing by the shut door, her arms crossed over her sweatshirt.
“So this is the place then?” Sophie looked around her. The weekend had just gone by and the apartment was back to its usual messy self. Toys were strewn over the floor, pots were boiling in the kitchen and Maya and Olivia’s clothes covered the couch in a high heap.
Olivia could see Sophie’s expression change as she took in the sight. The apartment was probably less than half the size of the one that Sophie could now afford in New York City.
“Isn’t this place too small for two people, Olivia?” Sophie asked, her gaze falling back on her friend now. Olivia sighed and walked over to the pots in the kitchen.
“Want some spaghetti? It’ll be ready soon,” Olivia said, carefully avoiding any interrogation. It wasn’t Sophie’s place to judge or ask questions, no matter how well meaning they were.
“Aren’t there any full-time jobs you can take up?” Sophie avoided the question as well, continuing on with her tunnel-vision. Olivia sighed again, hoping Sophie would get the message.
“You know there aren’t, Sophie. You know this town. At least none for a Lit Major.” Olivia stirred the tomato sauce in the pot without looking at her friend. When would these questions ever end?
Maya shrieked playfully and clapped her hands, and Olivia turned to smile at her daughter. Whatever Sophie might think, Maya was happy, and that was all that mattered.
“Why don’t you move somewhere else, Olivia? Somewhere where you can get a decent full-time job and get a bigger apartment?” Sophie had walked over to the kitchen, but Olivia concentrated on emptying the spaghetti into the colander.
“Sophie, please tell me you haven’t come here to spy on my life. What has gotten into you?” Olivia didn’t turn to look at her friend anymore, she was upset with Sophie, angry with her but at the same time, didn’t know how to demonstrate it. She didn’t yet know how to put her foot down.
“I don’t understand why you’re hell bent on spending your life like this. And you won’t even tell Craig. It makes me sad to see you this way,” Sophie said. When Olivia turned, she saw her friend staring at the large yellow stain on her sweatpants.
“Don’t worry. It’s just mustard sauce,” Olivia said, trying to smile as she rubbed the stain off. “And Craig is out of the question. I’m fine, Sophie, for the last time. I don’t need a big change in my life. I’m just a single mother. Thousands of women do this every day.” Olivia turned again to pour the tomato sauce over the pasta and toss it. She heard Sophie sigh and the click of her high heels on the floor as she walked closer to her.
“But you’re not everyone else. You’re talented, smart and deserve the best. We want the best for you. You shouldn’t have to live like this,” Sophie said, now standing beside Olivia as she stirred the pasta. Olivia remained silent for a few minutes before turning to Sophie.
She could feel her ears fuming, her lips quivering. She’d had enough. This onslaught was not what she’d asked for, from her mother, Rufus or Sophie.
“Sophie. Please, just go,” she said quietly, already regretting that she had spoken to Sophie in that manner. Sophie flinched and inched away from Olivia.
“I’m only trying to help!” Sophie shrieked, and Maya started crying.
Olivia pushed past Sophie and walked over to her daughter, picking her up from her playpen and patting her back.
“Just leave, Sophie. If you can’t be happy for me, if you can’t accept Maya in my life, then you don’t need to be here. I don’t want you here,” Olivia said, kissing her daughter’s head lightly. Sophie’s nostrils were flaring too, as she stared at Olivia and Maya in her arms.
“I only want what’s best for you and Maya. Whether or not I like kids, she’s your child,” Sophie said, adjusting the bag on her arm. Olivia rolled her eyes and turned away from her friend. She continued patting Maya’s back, who was still whimpering in her mother’s arms.
The sound of Sophie’s retreating footsteps behind her meant that it had finally worked. Sophie was leaving her house, leaving them to enjoy their lunch in peace before Olivia had to go to the bookstore again. She had too many problems to think about, without Sophie coming and stirring up new things.
“Olivia…I love you. You’re my best friend,” Sophie said, but Olivia didn’t turn to look at her. She heard Sophie sigh, open the door and leave the house, pulling the door shut behind her.
“It’s okay, baby. Sorry mommy got angry,” Olivia cooed into Maya’s ear and bounced her in her arms.
She turned to look at the door finally and pressed her eyes shut for a second. She loved Sophie too, of course she did. But Maya was now the most important person in her life and she would do anything it took to keep her happy and safe.
***
By the time Olivia had picked Maya up from her mother’s house and they had returned to the apartment, it was nine at night. Maya had already been fed and she lay dozing in her mother’s arms when Olivia brought her into the house.
Olivia smiled as she looked into Maya’s peaceful face and laid her down on the couch. Her phone rang in her bag suddenly and Olivia was snapped out of her thoughts. She found her bag on a chair, pulled her phone out and answered it, not recognizing the number.
“Hello,” she said, not entirely paying attention.
“Hello. Olivia?” the male voice said and she frowned.
“Yes. Who is this?” she asked, pulling her canvas shoes off her feet. She sat down on the couch, finally able to relax her feet after a long day.
“Hi, Olivia.” The tone of the voice was nervous, slightly unsure of himself. “This is Craig. Craig Walker,” he informed her, and Olivia stood up from the couch. What? Her heart was beating differently this time, but not out of excitement, the way it did each time she saw Rufus.
“Craig? Hi,” she mumbled, at a loss for words. She hadn’t spoken to him in three years.
“How are you, Olivia?” he asked. It sounded like he was pacing the floor. He was probably as nervous as she was. Olivia sat back down on the couch slowly. She needed to sit down for this.
“I’m good. How are you?” she asked and heard him clear his throat.
“I spoke to Sophie today. Your friend, Sophie Frost? Umm…she called me,” Craig said, and Olivia covered her face with her hands.
“Did she? Why? What did she tell you?”
Olivia asked, pressing her temples with her fingers. She couldn’t believe Sophie had done this.
“She said that…that…she told me that I have a daughter. With you…” He was struggling with his words and Olivia shut her eyes. This was an absolute nightmare.
“Craig,” she said, and he stopped talking. “I’m sorry that she called you. She shouldn’t have.”
“But is it true? Do we have a daughter together, Olivia?” Craig’s voice was shaking and it seemed like he was rushing around his room now, unable to walk slowly anymore.
“Look, Craig. It was a one-night thing. Let’s just forget it, okay?” Olivia said, and she pulled her phone away from her ear and hung up. She still had the phone in her hands when it started ringing again. Olivia dropped the phone on the floor and Maya woke up, squealing in her sleep.
Olivia bit down on her lip in frustration and picked Maya up into her lap, leaving the phone on the floor, ringing away.
She couldn’t believe any of this was happening. Sophie, that bitch!
Olivia put Maya in bed and sat by her side reading her a fairytale. The muffled sound of the phone ringing a few more times disturbed them, but only slightly. Olivia kept the door of the nursery tightly shut as she read.
Maya fell asleep easily and Olivia bent down to kiss her forehead and push the golden curls away from her face.
Back in the living room, she found her phone on the floor. Craig had tried calling her six times but had finally stopped. She dialed Sophie’s number instead and on the third ring her best friend picked up.
“Olivia!” Sophie exclaimed. The nervousness in her voice was palpable.
“What the hell did you do, Sophie?” Olivia hissed into the phone. She didn’t want to yell and wake Maya up again.
“You mean Craig? Did he call you?” Sophie asked. “I can explain…” she tried to say, but Olivia interrupted her.
“Yes, he called me. With questions. Which I’ve kept hidden from him for three years. Who gave you the right to ruin all of that in one day?” Olivia couldn’t help it anymore. She was screeching into the phone.
“Olivia…” Sophie tried to get in a word but Olivia wouldn’t let her.
“Didn’t I tell you to stay away from us, Sophie?” Olivia yelled again, throwing one of Maya’s stuffed toys against the wall.
“Listen to me. He wants to help. He wants to do something, anything. I think you should take up that offer,” Sophie said, and Olivia laughed.
“I don’t want Craig’s help. Or yours for that matter. I wanted it to be a secret and you’ve ruined it!” Olivia was pacing the floor now.
“Why do you want it to be a secret? It’s a small town, his parents still live here. You should take advantage of the situation. He is as responsible as you are for Maya!” Sophie had begun yelling into the phone as well.
“Well. Did you ever think that it was my choice? That I didn’t tell him?” Olivia screamed back, and Sophie fell silent.
“Sophie. Please don’t ever call me again, or visit me. You’ve broken my trust and you can’t ever have it back,” Olivia said, then hung up.
Whatever Sophie’s motivations behind this, she had taken it a step too far. Craig didn’t want to have anything to do with this, and neither did Olivia. There was a reason she had never told Craig about Maya and Sophie had no right to use that information how she saw fit.
Olivia bit down on her lip and continued to pace the floor.
“I hate you! I hate you!” she kept mumbling to herself, not quite sure who she meant when she said that.
Now she’d have to fend off Craig all her life, or at least until he forgot about this. She shook her head again as the image of Craig kissing her floated up in her brain. A shiver ran down her spine. If only she had had the courage to say no to Rufus, none of these things would have happened. If only she hadn’t fallen in love with him.
Chapter Seven
Olivia expected it to be Sophie when she heard the knock on the door the next evening. It was late again. Maya was fed and in bed and she was just putting the plates away after her dinner for one. But it wasn’t Sophie, it was Rufus.
Olivia opened the door gingerly and stared at him in silence. He was casually dressed today, in a pair of old jeans and a cotton t-shirt that clung to his torso and accentuated the muscles on his arms.
“What are you doing here?” Olivia asked, unable to keep the viciousness out of her voice. Was this another tactic of Sophie’s?
“I got your address from my sister,” he said, a weak smile on his face. The dimple was faintly visible on his cheek.
“And did she force you to come here as well?” Olivia asked, still standing at the door and blocking it. Rufus Frost wasn’t going to be invited into her home. No way was he allowed to come in and invade Maya’s personal space.
“What?” He looked confused and Olivia rolled her eyes. “No. Why would Sophie ask me to come here? I wanted to see you. It seemed awkward that night when you drove away. I’ve been thinking about you since then.” His voice had softened as he spoke, and Olivia could hear her heart beating. It was the same rhythmic palpitation which occurred every time she laid eyes on him. He looked as gorgeous as ever, smelt of the sea and his eyes still shone a crystal green. Olivia was suddenly conscious of the ragged cotton shorts and the oversized sweatshirt she was wearing. Her brown curls were tied up in a messy bun and she’d removed all her makeup by now. What could Rufus possibly want from her now that he’d seen her like this?
“What is there to think of, Rufus? We had sex. Just like three years ago, and now you’ll be gone from town in a few days and it’ll all be over,” Olivia said and crossed her arm over her chest. She was beginning to feel like she didn’t care what Rufus thought of how she looked. In fact, it might be better if he wanted to leave, unimpressed.
“Is that what it was to you?” Rufus asked, his brows tightening, his face contorting. Olivia’s heart stopped. She hadn’t expected this response from him.
“What are you talking about?” Her voice cracked and Rufus took a few steps towards her.
“Is that what that has always been to you? A one night stand? An occasional fuck every few years?” Rufus ran his hands through his hair as he spoke. He suddenly looked like a man who was broken. Olivia licked her lips in confusion. He seriously couldn’t be asking her this!
“That’s what it is to you! You’re an NFL star, why else would you sleep with me a few days before you have to go away both times?” Olivia let her arms drop to her side and stepped a few inches back into the apartment. She didn’t want to be so close to him. Rufus was looking into her eyes again with that scorching gaze that she couldn’t resist. Images of his bare chest and his hips grinding into hers kept reemerging and she had to force her brain to focus.
“So what if I’m in the NFL? That doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings,” he said, following her into the apartment. Rufus didn’t look around him at the state of the house, the way Sophie had the previous night. Instead, he kept his eyes focused on her.
“Feelings? What are you talking about?” Olivia squeaked, the panic rising in her bones now.
“That you hurt my feelings when you drove away that night. That I thought about you constantly these past three years, and hated myself for waiting that long to say anything to you.” Rufus stepped towards her again and Olivia stepped away. This couldn’t be happening. It had to be a game. Rufus Frost couldn’t actually be declaring to someone, to her of all people, that he actually had feelings.
“I don’t believe you,” she blurted out and turned her face away from him. She didn’t want to hear it, didn’t want to know that the past three years had been wasted. In fact, for all she knew, he could have told all his one night stands the same thing. What else could he possibly want from her? She had given him everything she had.
“Why, Olivia? Just because I’m famous? Don’t you know me as the Rufus from your childhood? The guy who always looked out for you?” he asked, and she was forced to face him
again.
“But you did the same for Sophie. I was her best friend. It was only natural that you’d look out for your sister and her friends.” Olivia’s voice was growing desperate. What game was Rufus playing? Her heart couldn’t deal with it anymore. What about Maya?
“I looked out for Sophie, for Sophie. And I looked out for you, for you.” His voice was tender and soft, and the look on his face had changed too. He was trying desperately for her to understand him, to believe him. But Olivia didn’t want to. What had she worked so hard for all these years?
“Olivia?” A different voice pierced through her brain and both she and Rufus turned to look at the door, which was still wide open.
She hadn’t seen him in person in three years, but it was definitely Craig Walker. Standing in the flesh, in smart, dark jeans and a tight leather jacket, with the same dark, stylish hair and a look of concern on his face.
“Craig?!” Olivia screeched, her hands flying to her face. What was going on? What could she have possibly done to offend the universe this much? She wanted to run away and hide somewhere.
“Rufus Frost,” Craig said, as he recognized the man standing in front of Olivia.
“Hello, Craig.” Rufus’ voice had changed suddenly as he smiled at Craig. The same devilish grin had returned to his face, the look that Olivia didn’t trust.
“What are you doing here, Craig?” Olivia broke in, stepping towards Craig now. He entered the house and shut the door behind him.
“I tried calling you back last night. But you didn’t answer. I want to see my daughter,” Craig said, his voice rising a little. Olivia threw a look at Rufus, and he looked like a defeated man. He was slowly accepting his loss.
“You can’t see her right now, Craig. Maya is sleeping and I’m not going to wake her up in the middle of the night to give her a shock.” Olivia dropped her voice now to drive in the point that her daughter was fast asleep in the room next door.
Craig came closer to her, a look of pleading in his eyes now.