You’re getting too far ahead of yourself. Neither man has asked for more than a simple kiss.
So true. But if one did, how would she respond? It was possible that John wouldn’t consider compromising her. They were of completely different worlds. But if he did, would he also accept her desire for Gus, whose looks sent sensations surging through her that conjured dark, delicious thoughts? And would Gus allow her to lie with John, whose dark skin and sharp, angled planes reminded her of the eagle he spoke of so often, and whose body promised a new world to be discovered? How could she bear to give up either man? Surely hungering for both was perverse and wrong, and she would burn in hell. Maybe that would be her eternity. She would gladly trade such an eternity for a lifetime of loving with her men.
Her reverie was interrupted when Gus returned. Silhouetted against the light at the front of the cave, he looked like something out of a Gothic novel—dark shadows contrasted with white flakes. Snow and ice crusted his hat and jacket, and wet snow clung to his lashes and hair.
He uncovered a chaotic stack of dried cactus and mesquite from the travois. “I kept it as dry as I could,” he said.
“That should last us a while,” John said. Together they stacked it against the wall.
Gus untied two plump rabbits from his horse. “I managed to kill these unlucky little guys on the way back.” By unspoken agreement, Gus went back outside, disappearing into the storm. John took care of Gus’s horse.
“Where is he going?”
“A short ways off where he can skin and gut the rabbits without leading every predator directly to us. They’ll find us easily enough when we roast the meat.”
“I could live out here for years and never know what you and Gus know about how to survive.”
John chuckled. “We’ve lived on the trail for years. I grew up learning most of this. Gus is a natural.”
“Where did you meet?”
“At school in Tuba City. His family has a big ranch in the southern part of the territory. They sent him to the Latter Day school the same year my father sent me.”
“And you’ve been friends ever since?”
“In a manner of speaking. There were a few years we didn’t see each other. But we’ve scouted together for the past eight years.”
Finished with the horses, he built a fire. Just when he had it going well, Gus returned.
“Coffee not ready yet?”
“Give me time, for God’s sake.”
Maire stood aside, feeling as though she watched a well-oiled machine. John fixed a metal pot and put it into the sandy dirt at the edge of the heat, and Gus used his knife to pare down two sturdy sticks. When he was satisfied, he braced them in the X-shaped brackets John had formed at each side of the fire. The smell of roasted rabbit made Maire’s mouth water. It had been a long day, and the strip of jerky she’d gnawed a few hours before hadn’t banished the hunger that had plagued her since morning. Dinner couldn’t come soon enough.
Day plunged into night as they ate, and soon the only world Maire knew was the tender, delicious meat filling her stomach, the hot coffee chasing it down, and the men sitting with her within the circle of light provided by the fire. She’d never been so content.
“Delicious,” she pronounced, licking her fingers.
“I saved the skins,” Gus said. “They’ll make fine mittens or slippers.”
Touched by his thoughtfulness, she laid her hand on his arm. “Thank you. I’m sure I can find someone to sew them for me.”
“I’ll do it,” John said quietly.
“You will?” The men of the Clans did the weaving, and now she knew they sewed, too. Not so different from the finest tailors at home. “Then I’ll treasure the gift that came from both your efforts.” How could she love the two men any more?
The real question is, how can you be sure this is love?
But she knew the answer. It came with the constriction of her heart whenever she thought of being without them. Either one of them.
“Tell us about where you’re from,” Gus said.
“Asheville is in the Blue Ridge Mountains. Very hilly except where the French Broad River cuts through. The hills are covered in trees, a great many pines, and the surrounding land is rich farmland.”
“Do you miss it?” A thread of wistfulness cut through John’s question.
“When I set out, I was excited to leave and explore places I'd only read about. I wanted new adventures. But I’ve found it isn’t easy to turn one’s back on the people and places of a lifetime.” He clicked his teeth and nodded, the way she’d seen his mother do. “But,” she continued, “I’ve found a wondrous world here, and excitement, and adventure, and…and feelings I’ve never known before.” She dropped her gaze in embarrassment and then forced herself to look up again.
“What kind of feelings, Maire?” Gus watched her intently.
“Love,” she whispered. “I love you. I love you both so much it breaks my heart to think of ever being apart.” She formed her hands into fists, fighting to keep from reaching out for them lest they start laughing and prove her a fool.
“You are the woman of my heart,” John said.
“And I love you, too,” Gus added.
With their unexpected declarations, her heart nearly broke anyway. Loving them, and knowing they loved her, and not having them was almost more painful than loving them silently. She stared into the fire. “But what are we going to do?”
“What do you want?” Gus’s voice came to her from closer than before.
“Both of you. I know that makes me a sinner and—”
Gus swept her into his arms and crushed her mouth with his. Desire swept through her even as his tongue pushed into her mouth and explored.
Surely she would faint. Almost certainly she would melt into the floor of the cave and disappear with the feelings raging through her. She framed his face with her hands and kissed him back as well as she knew how.
Seconds later, he broke the kiss, and John knelt beside her. Turning her into his arms, he took up where Gus left off, stroking her lips with his tongue and then seeking entrance. Her hands held on to his shoulders for dear life. She didn’t know how she stayed sitting upright. For sure, she’d never be able to stand.
Gus loosened her hair from the pins she’d hastily trapped it with that morning. Lord, only this morning? It seemed a million years ago. Pushing her hair aside, he kissed her neck, sending shivers down her back.
John raised his head and gently pushed her back into Gus, who wrapped his arms loosely around her. “Maire, you make my blood run hot. I want you. We want you,” he said, glancing at Gus. “But once taken, your purity can’t be given back.”
“You said you love us,” Gus added. “But what we want shouldn’t be taken lightly. I’ve told you I was married, but I never told Sally I loved her—not a voluntary admission.” A man said anything in the throes of passion, but poor Sally had never known his true love. He was somewhat ashamed of that, though he hadn't even noticed it at the time. Everything was changed now.
“And I’m sure John has never given a woman his love, either.” John shook his head. “We need you to be sure of your feelings, and be certain that what you feel isn’t just a whim while you’re alone with two men in a cave during a snowstorm.”
A burst of anger had her sitting up and moving back from them. “It’s true that I’m the baby of my family, but I’m not a child, and I’ll thank you not to treat me as one. I watched my sisters marry and leave home while I stayed and cared for my father and the house. And yes, I’m a virgin. But it doesn’t follow that I’m foolish or frivolous. I can’t be gulled into an admission of love or an action that would compromise me forever. I didn’t say I love you expecting that you feel as I do, although I did hope.” She stood on rather shaky legs. “And now I believe I will get some sleep.”
Gus leapt to his feet before she could take a step. “Not so fast.” And again before she could react, he took control of her lips once more.
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* * * *
Gus didn’t know why he had admitted his feelings to Maire, but when she’d made it a point to say that she loved him and John the words felt right. The feelings felt right, and holding her with John kneeling behind, running his hands under her skirt up her legs, felt right.
A shriek echoed off the rock walls. The fire must have played tricks with his eyesight because when Gus looked, an eagle sat at the entrance, regarding him with golden eyes. A coyote lay beside it, watching them with its head on its paws.
Maire moved, and Gus saw that she stepped from the wool trousers he’d given her in Bacavi. John must have pulled them down, and now Gus noticed that her pantaloons had come with them. She turned and sank to her knees, kissing John with fervor. Gus waited for jealousy to strike, but instead his breath quickened and what blood hadn’t already filled his cock rushed there. The fire’s glow illuminated her delicate features, her long lashes fluttering on her cheeks as John slanted his mouth over hers, her auburn hair falling down her back in shimmering waves, and her fine shape pressed firmly against John’s body.
Falling to his own knees, he reached around to unbutton her dress. She gave him enough room to pull the garment from her arms. Then her breasts filled his palms through her chemise. He covered them, pleased to hear her gasp of surprise change into a moan of pleasure as he circled her nipples with his fingers.
John pulled her chemise off her shoulders, and finally Gus touched her skin, as silky and smooth as he’d imagined it. Closing his eyes, he saw her astride him in his mind’s eye. He imagined her rising and falling over him, taking his cock deep within, her breasts bouncing with the rhythm of their fucking. He nearly came from the sensations conjured in his mind.
She broke the kiss with John and fell back into him, sitting on her feet. “I don’t know what to do,” she whispered.
“We will show you,” John whispered. “Let us teach you.” He tugged her legs out in front of her and eased her dress and chemise out from under her.
Gus licked his lips at the sight of her beauty. Full, round breasts, narrow waist, soft, flaring hips and long legs waited for their exploration. John looked at him, and he gave a nod. He would let John initiate her, taking her virginity, accompanied with Indian words and gestures that meant a great deal to him. Marriage was until death for the Hopi, just as it had been for him.
Gus had deflowered a virgin when he married ten years before, and knew how powerful the claiming could be. And there was another reason. Gus owed John his life. He hadn't been able to protect Sally from the Comanches, but he had done his best to protect John from all the trouble that damned Spider Grandmother threw his way.
A year after Sally's death, lost in drink and despair, Gus looked up one night outside a bar in Winslow to see two of John's face staring back at him. Gus had traveled well down the path of self destruction before John discovered him. If it had been any other Indian staring at him that night eight years ago, Gus would have killed him and never blinked an eye. If he could have focused on the correct image to shoot.
But the man Gus saw when he stared up from the dirt where he had fallen hadn’t been just any Indian. He’d looked into the dark, knowing eyes of John Eagle, his friend from school and the only other person in the world Gus knew to feel as empty as he did. John had brought him back to life, and their friendship had since helped dissipate some of the loneliness. Since that time, they had shared everything life had to offer.
It seemed fitting that now they would share this extraordinary woman. This was a new beginning.
Chapter Ten
How had she become lost in this world of emotion? She had not lived a life strictly guided by reason, but she had never given herself over to feelings to the point of excluding everything else. Yet now, with Gus’s hands roaming over her breasts and John kissing his way up her inner legs, she wanted nothing more than to forget everything in the world except what went on in this cave. She wanted to stretch and move, to find a way to satisfy the hunger of her willing flesh.
And more—she wanted so much more, though she had little idea what more there could be. Between her thighs, an indescribable itch made her writhe with longing.
Then John’s lips no longer skimmed her calf, knee or thigh. Suddenly, his mouth covered the area at the apex of her legs. She'd had no idea a man could cause such exquisite joy. But she knew it now. Knew it as she arched off the cave floor, digging her head into Gus’s shoulder and pushing her tender flesh into John’s questing mouth.
His breath was hot and wet. His tongue lapped at her, actually—merciful heavens—plunged inside her. Over and over he explored with his tongue and controlled with his mouth. Slipping his hands under her buttocks, he lifted her for his plunder. But when he moved his attention a little higher, Maire screamed with a burst of emotion like nothing she’d ever known. Starlight flashed behind her closed eyelids. Her breath held. Her heart pounded. She bucked against John’s mouth with spasms that left her drained.
When she opened her eyes, she lay flat on the floor of the cave. John’s shirt was gone, and when she raised her head and looked down her body, she saw his trousers were open. A huge rod of dark-red flesh protruded from between his legs. Fear fought with a strange desire. As she stared, it grew longer. John reached down and stroked it, not tenderly but pulling it, pushing it.
“Maire, if you’re unsure about being ours, now is the time to say so, before things go too far.” Gus whispered the words close to her ear.
Her mind in a fog from the whirlwind she’d just flown through, she wondered if this was all, if this was everything. “But can I have you both?”
He smiled tenderly. “Don’t worry about me. By the end of the night, should you want us, you’ll belong to us both.”
“Haven’t things already gone too far? I—I feel as though I’ve died and come back to life.”
“You’re still a virgin, Maire,” John said.
“I don’t want to be,” she said. “I want to know what it means to be a woman, and I want to know with you and Gus.” She stroked Gus’s face. “Let me live the dream.”
“Touch me, Maire,” John said. He rose and stripped off his trousers, and then knelt beside her. Gus placed her feet flat and spread her knees. Then he caressed her, stroking between her lower lips and sliding a finger inside. John took her left hand and guided her up and down his shaft. The flesh was like velvety softness molded over wood. Between the texture beneath her fingertips and the now-known breathlessness Gus inspired with his fingers, Maire lost all sense of reality.
“This is my cock,” John said in a low voice. “It’s hard so it will fit deep within you.”
“This will go inside me?”
“I promise it will. This first time, when my cock fills your pussy, it might hurt. Virgins are tight and I will pierce a barrier of skin. This isn’t a bad thing, my love. It’s very precious and sacred for my people. Unlike Pavati and Masichuvio, we won’t have our hair woven together, but we will be joined by this act, Maire.”
“Do you want me?”
“Very much. But I want you to be sure. The Clan takes a joining very seriously.”
She smiled and wrapped her hand around his cock. “Like saving someone’s life?”
“Yes.”
“You will be saving my life again by doing this.”
John looked to Gus, and Gus nodded. She rolled her hips against Gus’s hand, seeking the oblivion she’d felt just a few minutes ago. The scent of musk filled the air.
“You’re very ready,” Gus said. He moved back to her side and removed his clothing. Maire watched to see if his cock resembled John’s. Shorter, thicker, she needed no urging to take him in hand. A bulging vein ran his length, and instinctively, she stroked it with her thumb. Gus sucked in a breath.
John knelt between her legs. Raising his gaze and his arms to the ceiling, he chanted words she didn’t understand. But when he shifted his gaze to her, she read his passion in its dark intimacy. He stretched his legs o
ut behind him and braced himself on his hands. His cock touched her pussy lips, and the sensation was the same and yet so different from when he’d used his mouth.
Gus leaned over her and took her lips, plunging his tongue into her mouth. He used his hand on her breast to tease her nipple. She moaned, and he swallowed the sound.
As delicious as Gus made her feel, he couldn’t distract her from John. His cock breached the entrance to her pussy, and immediately her skin stretched until it felt like bursting. John said he would fit, but she didn’t see how.
Gus pinched her nipple, and she jumped, inadvertently taking a bit more of John. Gus’s tongue stroked the roof of her mouth, she stroked his cock, John continued his onslaught, and the world stopped spinning. How had she—a good Catholic girl raised by a strict father and educated by nuns and priests—ended up on the floor of an Arizona cave making love to two men? How was it that she couldn’t get enough, that she couldn’t breathe and didn’t care? That she thought she would die and welcomed it?
Maire sensed John’s deep breath, and then he thrust into her. A quick, sharp pain came and went, disappearing as he moved in and out.
Gus lowered his mouth to her ear. He licked the rim, making her shiver. “Are you all right?”
“Kiss me,” she demanded.
Instead of her lips, he clamped his mouth over her breast, nipping and licking her nipple.
Maire thrashed her head from left to right, trying to find a port in the storm. Then she gave up and let herself go. Releasing Gus’s cock, she held his head to her breast. She spread her knees and raised them high on John’s hip, meeting his drives, inviting him deeper. The whys and hows escaped her. John filled her from the inside out. Gus added a bit of pain and a touch of fire. Combined, they took her to places she didn’t know existed.
Without warning, she flew into the blackness of night and touched the stars. She saw it clearly. The priests were wrong. This was why God made man and woman. This was the meaning of the universe and the reason for living. She couldn’t go back to the way things were before. And she didn’t want to.
Maire [The Sisters O'Ryan 4] (Siren Publishing Ménage Everlasting) Page 8