Betrayal. Heath was right; that was exactly how Tess felt it. Like a spear through her heart every time she considered what her husband’s depravity had done to her life. Quentin may have had a weakness for cards, but that didn’t mean that he could toss away her future without so much as an “I’m sorry.” The losses had accumulated over years and there could have been plenty of time for Tess to try to repair the damage before all was lost. If she’d only known. So much lost: her innocence, her safety, her trust. All for being ignorant of the danger.
Feeling as if they had a sort of scarred kinship, she sighed. “I’m just so glad we never had children. The scandal would have tainted their lives.”
He nodded. “You wouldn’t have wanted them to have had to suffer like you did.”
“Or as you did.”
From the look in his eyes she could tell that she’d touched a nerve.
She licked her lips. “The Mr. Bartlett I knew was a wonderful tutor, a charming man who always had a joke on his lips or a sweet in his pocket for the young ones.”
Heath’s handsome face darkened. “My father is a bit too charming for his own good.”
Tess shook her head. “I can’t imagine your father being anything but a complete gentleman.”
“True gentlemen don’t sleep with another man’s wife.”
The silence grew thick, and Tess wished there was a way she could ease his pain. “We suffer under the sins of our parents, I suppose…Which, again, makes me thankful that I never had children.”
“I find it hard to believe that you feel that way. If I recall correctly, Elizabeth was your favorite name if you had a girl.”
Tess swallowed, surprised by the fact that he remembered her dreams and by how deeply it moved her. “Not having children left me with more choices.”
“What kind?”
Pursing her lips closed, she forced herself to remember that she needed to be more careful with Heath. He was a skilled inquirer and she tended to let her guard down when he spoke of their childhood. She made mental note not to allow that to happen again. No one could know about Wheaton and her work for the Foreign Office.
Pasting a smile on her face, she met his gaze. “My book business, of course. I am independent. If I’d had children, I would have had to do as my father told me.”
“Could you have done that? You’d always sworn you would only marry for love.”
“And my parents castigated me for being so naive. ‘People marry for convenience,’ they told me. I suppose that I would have done what I needed to do.”
“And now?”
“Now I wouldn’t take anyone. Marriage, being locked with someone for eternity…” She shook her head.
“Eternity?”
“Even though my husband is three years gone, his family members are still mine. They spend so much time trying to paint me the devil that they almost make it a sport.”
“They’re only doing it to curry favor with Lord Berber’s family.”
Her mouth dropped open; she was shocked that he could be so astute. “I’d always thought so, but how…?”
His burly shoulder lifted in a shrug. “If they side with you, then it’s almost the equivalent of saying that Lord Berber was a bloody idiot for attempting to sail a dangerous channel drunk. It’s much more politically advantageous to vilify you.”
Tess exhaled, feeling an amazing sense of relief that someone understood. “Well…ah, what was I saying?”
“You were speaking of marriage being for eternity.”
“Oh yes.” Considering her own mistakes and Bills’s opinion of Miss Whilom, Tess felt that she had a duty to warn Heath. She didn’t want to dwell on the fact that every time she thought about Heath and the golden-haired chit she wanted to kick something. “Marriage is a serious commitment. It should never be entered into lightly.”
“Why did you marry your husband, Tess?”
Frowning, Tess looked away. “I was so giddy with the idea of being in love that I was blind to Quentin’s true nature.”
“So you don’t blame your parents who guided you?”
“I shouldn’t have followed along so blindly.”
“What about his parents? His family purposely hid his gambling addiction.”
She blinked. “How did you know about that?”
“I’ve asked around. His father was quite fastidious about keeping the problem hidden, but he was one of the men pulling his son out of the holes that he dug for himself. No matter how much they might try to deny it, they knew.”
Tess exhaled, feeling an odd sense of wonder. Heath Bartlett was the first man of her acquaintance who actually sifted through the lies and unearthed the truth of it all. Lightness expanded in her chest, and she felt liberated by his understanding. Amazed, she shook her head. “I wish I’d have known sooner.”
Heath felt his fist curl in impotent anger for all Tess had been through. And she took too much responsibility upon her small shoulders. “And done what? You were married; everything you owned belonged to him.”
Her lovely face was determined. “I would have found a way.”
“I believe that you would.” A smile teased his lips as he realized that Tess was a lioness when it came to protecting those she loved. It made perfect sense that she would try to stop her husband from joining his friend on a dangerous sailing excursion that was more akin to suicide than a race. Heath couldn’t fathom how anyone could fault her for that. If it were Heath, he would treasure such concern.
What must it be like to be loved by such a woman?
“Never again will I trust my future to any man,” she murmured.
Heath straightened, surprised by how upset her pronouncement made him. “So because of your deceitful husband you can’t trust any man?”
“I couldn’t trust you, could I? While pretending to have a wager to join my society, instead you were investigating me for a crime.”
“I had honorable intentions.”
“Yes, like putting me in prison. Tell me, when we were at Marks-Cross Street Prison, did you imagine it was me begging behind the bars?”
Heath shifted uncomfortably, reminded that he’d had that very thought. “I was actually upset by the notion that you might someday be in such a position if the theft charges were true.”
“Why did you take this case? Especially if at the time you didn’t know that it pertained to me?”
“Belington is Lady Bright’s cousin.”
“Ah. I see. You saw this as a mean of gaining an advantage with your new mother.”
“In-law, you mean.”
“Yes, of course, although, to her credit, my mother-in-law always treated me as one of her own, and had me call her ‘Mother’ like her other children. Until after the accident, that is.”
No matter how welcoming, Heath couldn’t quite imagine Lady Bright treating him as one of her own, but rather as a superior servant. But he would win her over, eventually.
The notion snaked into his mind that the end result suddenly didn’t seem quite worth the effort. Heath pushed it aside; of course he wanted to be accepted by Lady Bright and all her kin.
Tess bit her lip. “I never knew what happened to your mother.”
Heath blinked as, unbidden, images of his mother surfaced from his memory. Long raven tresses tied back in a bun so big he could barely grasp it in two little hands. Sympathetic eyes, golden brown like honey. Slender fingers that had lovingly caressed his cheeks when he’d fallen to sleep at night. Her palms had been rough from her labors, but her hugs had been wonderfully soft and she’d smelled endearingly of leather and parchment. “She was a librarian. Second generation, actually. Her parents had run a lending library in Bath.”
He chuckled, the memories wrapping around him like a blanket warmed by a fire. “She used to call me her ‘little solicitor’ since I negotiated for everything. Reading another page in a book before dinner, when I would go to bed, whether I could go out and play…”
“So she planted the idea i
n your head of entering the legal profession?”
“Yes.”
“What happened to her?”
That warm imaginary blanket slipped away as the darker memories crept in. She’d been so resourceful, so resilient, that everyone had been surprised when she hadn’t stood back up. “Struck by a carriage.”
“I’m so sorry.” Tess’s eyes were tinged with sadness and her brow was furrowed with concern for him. He was touched. “How old were you?”
“Ten.”
“So young…”
“It was a long time ago…” He shrugged, looking away. “I don’t talk of it much.”
Heath realized that his family had broken then, irreparably. His father had accepted the first post he could find away from Bath, removing Heath from the only home he’d ever known.
Heath stared out the window, finding it hard to imagine that living with the Whilom clan was going to feel like being “home.” Still, he wouldn’t feel the interloper the way he’d had when he’d been going from family to family with his father. Or would he? Would he always be the son-in-law whose presence had to be explained? “Picked himself up from humble beginnings…” “Has promise…” “Works with the solicitor-general, you know…”
But what if his potential came to naught? What if the political winds changed and he was left out in the cold? Would his new family stand by him then? He hoped…but it was a hollow feeling tinged with doubt.
He didn’t want to think about the future, and instead shifted back to what he could control. He straightened. “The investigation, yes. Lady Bright drafted Solicitor-General Dagwood to her cause. Or else we probably never would have gotten involved.”
Tess nodded, accepting his change in topic. “And you took the assignment without knowing it was about me.”
“Yes.” His hands fisted, but he forced them to relax. “Would you please tell me what happened with Belington?”
Looking out the carriage window, Tess exhaled as if upset. Heath wondered with whom. “I was lonely, he was an ardent pursuer…it was a stupid mistake. I knew it even before…” She looked down at her fingers knitted in her lap. “It was a stupid mistake I never should’ve made.”
“A mistake?”
A rueful smile played on her lips. “Yes, only once. I ended it immediately.”
“You said earlier that you didn’t believe he was in love with you. How can you be so sure?” Heath could easily see how it might happen. Tess was exactly the kind of woman a man could fall head over heels in love with.
Heath gulped, shock and some unknown emotion surging through him that was tinged with fear. Head over heels in love? With Tess?
“So…” His voice cracked, and he coughed into his fist, clearing his throat. “So…what were we talking about?”
Her gaze was speculative. “George Belington.”
“Yes. Belington. So he lied in his affidavit,” Heath stated, feeling stupid.
“I’m surprised that when you interviewed him the truth didn’t come out. He’s not very sly.”
“I didn’t interview him. If I had…” Then Heath would never have pursued the investigation and wouldn’t have followed Tess. He wouldn’t be with her right now, feeling these chaotic, scorching emotions that made his head spin. Or the thundering desire that made him burn to be with her.
No matter that he didn’t believe in such things, it was destiny that had brought them together, destiny that had foreseen this from the moment he’d bumped into her at Andersen Hall.
Furrowing her brow as if deep in thought, she bit her lower lip, something he longed to do. She was too tempting for either of their good. “So how could he make the charges against me?”
He pulled his mind back to the conversation. “It was all laid out in an affidavit, with Lady Bright pursuing the claims.”
“Neat and cowardly. Just like Belington. He probably expected that I would go haring off to the country begging him to drop the charges.”
“The man obviously has no idea with whom he’s dealing.”
Tess looked up. “Why do you say that?”
“I think you’d sooner take up arms than go begging to someone who’d wronged you.”
Her peach-colored lips lifted at the corners. “Methinks you may finally be taking my measure, Mr. Bartlett.”
His insides stirred. Tess couldn’t be flirting with him, not after he’d deceived her. Could she? Her dark as coal lashes lowered across the top of those petal-soft cheeks.
She licked her lips, spearing him with longing to taste her. “So what would your advice be to me, if, perchance, you would deign to grant me the favor of your…legal attentions.”
“I…ah.” He coughed into his fist, his mind scrambling to interpret the signals she was sending. He ached with desire for her, but didn’t want to presume. “I…ah, would return anything he’d given you, as a sign of your good faith, and provide any receipts for the books.”
“And it would end there?” Her voice was like a caress.
Tugging at his cravat, Heath swallowed. “I believe so.”
She looked up, her crystal blue gaze swirling with heat and desire, piercing his soul. “And so your reason for being at the society…your reason for being near me…would be gone.”
He was across the space between them and had her in his arms in a breath. “You’re not going to get rid of me that easily.”
As his mouth claimed hers, his body thrummed with aching need. He needed her as he needed air and water and sustenance. He could no more stop kissing her than fly to the moon.
A delighted sigh escaped her lips, and he knew that she accepted their fate.
Chapter 23
Tess surrendered to Heath’s kisses and to the desire pulsing between them, feeling safer and freer than she had in years. There was nothing false in her kisses, no part of herself that she held back. She wanted him, hungrily, and wasn’t afraid to show it.
With his arms wrapped around her, Heath made love to her with his mouth, his tongue caressing hers so enticingly that her head swam.
“You’re incredible,” he moaned into her mouth. His words caused a quiver deep in her middle, warming her in places she yearned to be touched.
Tess sucked his bottom lip, savoring the taste of him. Her hands roamed his broad shoulders, hugging him closer, pulling his hard chest more tightly against hers.
His fingers threaded her hair and cradled the base of her head, leaning her back against the cushions. Of their own accord, her legs spread, welcoming him. His hard hip pressed through her skirts deep into the juncture between her thighs. She shifted against him, needy and demanding.
His hand cupped her breast, and desire spiked through her. Her back arched and her head fell back as she gasped for breath.
His lips claimed her neck, sucking gently as his hand slipped beneath the folds of her coat. He kneaded the soft flesh of her breast as his mouth trailed up the column of her neck, raising the hairs of her skin.
His warm breath caressed her ear as he licked her earlobe. Her hips rocked and her mind scrambled. Her only awareness was of the need to have him deep inside her. Now.
Shouts permeated Tess’s fog as the carriage rolled to a halt.
Heath grabbed the door handle before it could open. “Give us a minute!” His voice was thick.
As she collected herself, Tess’s only thought was how to make it to her bedroom as quickly as possible. She’d never wanted anything or anyone more in her life.
Heath helped her to sit and adjust her clothing.
“I must look a fright,” she whispered, her voice husky, her thoughts jumbled.
Kissing her swollen lips, he growled. “Frightfully tempting. I can’t keep my hands off you.”
The walk inside was a blur. Thank heavens it was the servants’ half day off and no one was in the front of the house except for trusty Anna. The young maid accepted Tess’s outer garments with a wink and a smile, clearly not censorious of her employer’s activities. Tess recalled that Anna ha
d always liked Heath and distantly wondered if it was that fondness or the fact that Tess was finally engaging in some wicked fun.
But Tess couldn’t dwell on that now; she just had to move in the direction of her bedchamber.
With Heath.
His presence beside her was like a powerful wind pressing against her, silently urging.
Anna departed, closing the door behind her mere seconds before Tess was in Heath’s arms once more.
They tore frantically at their clothes, kissing each inch of skin as soon as it was exposed. They explored, touched, savored, each movement heightening her desire until she could take it no longer.
“Heath, please,” she groaned.
He lifted her in his arms.
“Burgundy, not crimson,” he murmured, eyeing the bed.
“What…?”
“Nothing. I like the coverlet.” He carried her to the bed and deposited her onto the soft mattress.
Covering her naked body with his, he lay on top of her, comfortably positioning himself between her open thighs.
His kisses were hot and wanting, his skin burning as if with a fever.
He entered her with a deep thrust, and her body wrapped around him with pleasure.
Sighing, Tess closed her eyes.
Every sensation was a color surging through her. Reds, oranges, and golds swirled behind her closed lids, like the sunlight of a new dawn. She felt free; she felt whole.
Heath rode her, carried her…
His pace quickened; his body went taut.
Her heartbeat sped up. Her breath seized. Her body tensed. She clung to Heath, waiting, anticipating, needing, wanting…
Stars exploded behind her closed lids as her world shattered.
Together they were lost.
Chapter 24
Tess rolled over and sighed, unable to believe how deliciously wonderful she felt at this moment. It was as if her worries had been twisting her in knots, and over the course of many hours of Heath’s extraordinary attentions, she was suddenly free from all burdens. Either that or she simply no longer cared.
Sari Robins Page 19