Jewel shook her head as if to ward off any more of his sly enticements. He stepped closer, touching her from shoulders to thighs. Her knees nearly buckled, but she held her own. For how much longer she could accomplish that impossible task was another story.
“If I remember correctly, dollface, you asked me that a few times last night.” He leaned nearer so now his lips brushed her ear lobe. “And the answer is the same as it was then. Yes, I’d love to come deep inside of you.”
Biting back on a moan, she squeezed her eyes shut. A quiver shot through her, and then another. Last night the sensualist in Devon reemerged. With words and deeds he’d reminded her. First, he’d toyed with the contrast of the cool champagne and the burning heat of his lips, mouth, and tongue. Next, came the silky negligee whispering across her skin, lingering on her twin hard peaks, and then dipping between the junction of her legs. In the shower less than an hour ago, he’d joined her, using the slick bar of soap to glide over every square inch of her.
“You’re trembling,” he pointed out as he gathered her in his arms. “Are you remembering making love in that big bed?”
The husky timber of his voice revealed his own titillating memories. Another shiver racked her body as his hands slid down her spine. “If I wasn’t so sore I’d drag you back to that soft feather bed and wouldn’t let you go for the rest of the day and night.”
His groan rumbled beneath her ear and she reveled in arousing him just by promises alone. “And I’d let you, too.” He paused, clearly collecting himself. “So why go horseback riding if you’re sore?”
Grinning, and then dropping a quick kiss on the arrow of skin exposed above his buttoned white shirt, she pulled back, saying, “I haven’t ridden in so long I can’t let this chance pass me by. Don’t worry, it’ll only be for a half hour.”
Looking down into her joyous expression, Devon didn’t have the heart to deny her this pleasure, nor any other she desired. Last night he’d been caught in the web of passion and didn’t want to be released anytime soon. Just being near her kept him in a constant state of anticipation, a condition he welcomed. Every part of me is alive for the first time in twelve years. All because of Jewel. “Is that invitation to join you still open?”
She nudged her fist in his middle. “See, I knew you knew what I meant in the first place.”
Wiggling his eyebrows, he asked, “Hey, can’t blame a guy for trying, can you?”
She shot him a provocative look under her long, dark lashes that nearly brought him to his knees. A brilliant flare of heat blazed a trail through his veins. He swallowed hard.
“I’ll make you a deal.”
“Anything,” he quickly answered, thinking she just might give in and quench his burning need for her, if only for a few hours.
“You can come along if you massage all my sore muscles later tonight.”
Devon felt his blood pressure rise several degrees. “It would be my pleasure, dollface.” His voice was so husky and low he wondered if she even heard him.
On tip-toe, she whispered in his ear, “Oh no, it will be all mine.”
***
Fifteen minutes later, riding down the ribbon of old country road behind Jewel, Devon tried to concentrate on anything but his very distracting, very sexy wife.
Trees swayed gently in the slight breeze, their yellow, bronze, and red leaves a colorful reminder of autumn. The warmth of the sun cast away any chill in the air. Earthy scents tickled his nostrils. The horses’ hooves rhythmic clopping on the narrow patches of dirt were music to his ears.
With all the beautiful Vermont scenery surrounding him, Devon still couldn’t take his eyes off of his wife for more than a minute or two.
The graceful way she sat in the saddle and moved in perfect harmony with her mount brought long ago memories of riding with her to the surface. Back then, he’d been the stable boy and she his secret lover. The stark yearnings of that time and place rushed back and he nearly ached with it. He’d longed for so much and had gotten so little.
Shaking off the disturbing emotional tug, Devon focused on his mission from then. From the time his father died when he was ten he’d planned on righting some wrongs. His course set, he’d pursued his goal until he’d fallen for Jewel. After that everything had changed; his instincts blurred, pulling him away from what he had to do.
The thought of hurting her had stopped him from using her to his advantage. Her innocence struck a chord deep inside him and he refused to expose her vein of vulnerability. Also, for his own selfish reasons, he declined to shatter the trust she felt in him. No one had ever believed in him like she had.
Now, he focused on achieving his goal. He’d altered his plans for her once. But not this time. This time he had to find the truth and set the record straight, for himself and for Sean. Surely she wouldn’t deny her son that.
Just a few feet up ahead of him, Jewel coaxed her horse to turn in a half circle so now she pointed in the direction from where they’d come. Drawing beside her, he halted, his thigh brushing hers. He bit back a groan. Instantly, he noticed her glowing face and sparkling eyes. His heart swelled in his chest. “Enjoying yourself?”
“Definitely.” A soft smile played around her lips, causing his gaze to linger on her mouth still swollen from his kisses.
“Well, when you get back home you can ride every day if you want.”
She gasped. “You’re kidding, right?”
His mount shifted. Devon pulled him back. “Just as soon as the repairs are done on the stables, which should be in a couple of days, I’m going back to Texas for my horses. By next week they should be safely in Connecticut.”
A frown marred her brow. “You’re leaving?”
He detected a thread of pain in her question. Concerned, he said gently, “I have a business to run. I told you that already. I travel the country checking on sites, bidding for new custom homes to build, and making sure everyone who works for my partner and me is doing their job.”
Ducking her head, she shrugged. “I just thought it wouldn’t be so soon.”
His middle dipped; he sensed she was remembering the last time he’d left her. Before he could say or do anything, she nudged her heels into her horses’ flanks, propelling the animal into a slow walk.
To Jewel the sunlight seemed to lose its brilliance and the once warm breeze turned chilly. She shivered. The joy of being on a horse once again faded. A bleakness entered her middle. He’s leaving.
She’d braced herself for the inevitable, but didn’t realize how soon it would occur. He slipped back into her life so easily, and then would disappear just as quickly.
He’d said the horses would be back by next week, but what about him? How long would he stay away? How long would it take for her to heal this time? And how long would it be before the emptiness stopped throbbing inside her, if ever? An image of her lonely mother always waiting for her father to return from business came to her. Like mother, like daughter.
The sound of his horse nearing hers penetrated her dazed mind. When Devon drew level with her, she felt the tension pulsing from him. His large hand covered hers as she gripped the leather reins.
“Let’s stop for a while.” His voice held an impatient edge.
She nodded, hoping to get whatever was to come over and done with. Following him off the narrow strip of road and into a small, grassy clearing, Jewel halted beside a large, gnarled oak tree. As she dismounted, he wrapped his hands around her waist and assisted her to firm ground. For a moment, her wobbly legs refused to support her.
“Whoa, now,” he said gently, tightening his hold.
Grateful for his strength and understanding, she leaned back into him. “I’ll be all right in a minute.”
Several seconds ticked by as she relished touching him, her back to his front. Then a troubling thought intruded. She couldn’t get used to this. He wouldn’t always be there for her. Dragging herself away from him, she ducked under his arm in order to tend to her horse.
&nbs
p; Devon stepped near, reaching out. “I’ll take care of it.”
She hesitated, and then gave in. He made short work of leading both animals to a dense patch of grass and tying their reins to a nearby branch.
Leaning against the rough bark of the oak, she rubbed the quavering muscles in her thighs.
“I’d offer to do that for you, but right now I don’t think I can trust myself near you.”
Looking up at him sharply, she detected the way his heated gaze lingered where she massaged. Warmth suffused her body, making her highly aware of the swift rush of desire invading her veins. Liquid fire replaced her blood. “Devon,” she said in a throaty whisper.
Closing his eyes, he raked a hand through his hair. “I’m holding on by a thread, Jewel.”
Accepting his warning, she relented. “I know.” Me, too.
He blew out a breath, and then focused on her. “About my leaving…”
She winced as if a cold bucket of water had just been dumped over her head. “There’s no need to rehash it.”
A cloud seemed to descend over his features, dark and ominous. “Damn it, Jewel, don’t go pulling that crap with me. Don’t draw a curtain down between us. I’m not going to stand for it, not anymore.”
Blinking in disbelief, she stared at him. A muscle jerked along his clenched jaw and his eyes, now a dark, dangerous green, glared at her. He’d never challenged her before, never pushed the boundaries of the fragile teenage love they’d shared.
With stark clarity, she realized they both had changed drastically and dealing with each other from here on out would be a scary path filled with new dilemmas and many potholes.
“Don’t look so incredulous, dollface, I have my limits.”
Trying to get back to a more even keel, she shot him a tremulous smile. “Maybe it’s frustration.”
“Oh, believe me it is, sexual and otherwise. The gloves are coming off, understand?”
Jewel gulped hard, noting the grimness clouding his features. Reaching behind her, she clutched the tree, feeling the abrasive wood scrap her fingertips.
“Growing up you had it all, and I had nothing.”
Shaking her head, she whispered, “Only on the outside.”
He blew out a breath. “Back then you were untouchable, forbidden. I used to watch you from afar, hungry for a glimpse of you. I stayed away as long as I could; I knew how dangerous it was for both of us. I kept my distance until it hurt more for me to stay away than to get close to you.”
“The night I was forced to shoot the mare,” she choked out, reliving the agony of what she’d done.
A wave of pain chased across his face. He nodded curtly. “I couldn’t let you ache like that, not alone.” He shrugged. “I thought I could help.”
“You did, believe me, you did. No one but you understood what I was feeling, how betrayed, how disillusioned.”
“God, I could have wrung his neck for shattering you like that.” Rough emotion clogged his voice. Clearing his throat, he continued, “Once I had a taste of you, I couldn’t let you go.”
“Me, neither.”
“When we were apart, I tried to convince myself how ridiculous it all was. Me, a penniless bastard, thinking I could actually have a relationship with you, the beautiful rich princess—”
“Who lived in the ivory tower,” she sneered.
He grinned, a lop-sided smile that made her insides flutter. “Sounds about right.”
The soft haunting quality of his voice touched places in her that she’d tried to shield for years, places where she once kept all her dreams locked away.
“Each secret meeting, each shared moment with you was like a gift. You swept me away with all your talk of being together until, months later, I couldn’t think of anything but what you wanted for us. When we skipped the senior prom to get married I truly believed we could make it. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have gone through with it.”
“How did everything change so much in less than two months?” she asked, desperate to find some answers from that time, to make some sense of it all.
He raked a hand through his hair. “You did.”
A mixture of confusion and denial warred inside her. “Me?”
“Yes, you. We agreed to tell our parents right away. But by the next day you backpedaled.”
Closing her eyes, Jewel brought up the image of his face from then. Betrayal had been clearly written all over his features. A dagger of pain slashed her heart as if she were experiencing the moment all over again. “I was afraid.” Afraid of my father. Afraid reality wouldn’t live up to the dream.
“It didn’t get any better after that, did it? First you suggested we wait a week or two, and then you kept moving the date up with each new excuse. After graduation, you said. But that came and went.” A wealth of bitterness spilled out. “Damn it, Jewel, just how long were you going to wait to say something?”
Focusing on him once again, she noted the wounded pride in his eyes and shrank from her role in hurting him. “I never meant to—” she stopped short when he shot her a warning glare.
“You only thought of yourself.”
How true, she admitted silently, angry at the scared, cowering young woman she’d been. “You’re right,” she whispered softly. “I never had the guts to stand up to him.”
He thumped a fist on his chest. “I would have done it for both of us, if only you’d have let me.”
Her middle clenched. “I think in a way I knew you would have. That scared me, too. I could only imagine one outcome if you had, just what he did do, throw you out. Then I’d have to choose between you. So I stalled. I kept hoping that time would help, time for me to get the courage to tell daddy, time for him to accept you, time for my wishes to come true.”
A sad, wistful smile played on his lips. “You always were a dreamer, dollface.”
“I thought I had enough for both of us. It turns out I didn’t, at least not enough for you to stay.”
“We just had different dreams, that’s all. Still do.”
His words tugged at her heart, making her ache deep inside. Wrapping her arms around herself, she went on, “In the end it didn’t matter, did it? The night the fire broke out in the kitchen and daddy couldn’t find me, he sent out a search party.”
“I figured when Cyrus found us in the loft, he’d have ratted on me.” Disbelief colored his words.
“You were as close to him as anyone had ever been. He’d never do that to you.”
Devon snorted. “I worked in the stables under his supervision. It wasn’t anything more than that.”
“Hah! You didn’t see the way he looked at you when you grabbed my hand, and then walked to the house to confront my father. He admired you for having the guts to do what you did, admired you like a man does a son.”
A questioning look chased across his face, and then he shook it off. “You read too much into it.”
She probed a sore spot of his. “He didn’t betray you, Devon, that night or any other time. You still have that to hold on to.”
A strange smile twisted his lips. “Maybe he just didn’t have enough time like you did.”
A sorrow swamped her. “Oh God, Devon, if I could take it all back, I would. I’d change so much about myself, about us.”
“I thought we had something special.”
“We did.” Confusion shot through her. “What makes you say different?”
“You, that’s what. You might have given me your body, but you never opened up to me, not really, not the real stuff. I could read it in your eyes, but never once did you tell me how much you were hurting inside, from your mother dying, from your old man practically neglecting you, from anything.” The last came out with a great deal of vehemence, taking her by surprise.
Tears smarted the backs of her eyes. Years of bottled up pain emerged. “You were just like them.”
He jerked his head back, obviously shocked by her accusation. “Me? Like them?”
“Yes.” Her voice broke. �
��She died without saying good-bye. He went off on business trips, making me stay in that great big house all by myself. And you…you always told me you were going away to make your fortune. Well, you did. You left then and you’re going to leave now. No one’s ever wanted to stay for me.”
Chapter 10
Stunned silence reined down, stretching unbearably. As time ticked slowly by, Jewel grew appalled by her outburst. Never had she revealed so much that resided inside her. The scars ran deep and long, etched into her soul.
Only the horses’ munching on the grass close by intruded on the stark quietness vibrating in the small space between them. When she gathered enough courage, she glanced at him, and then looked again, this time for much longer.
Conflicting emotions chased across his shocked features. First doubt, and then denial showed itself. Next came a questioning look. Dawning soon followed, and then finally acceptance. “Sweet Jesus!”
Unnerved by it all, she said, “Forget it, all right?”
With two steps, he stood toe to toe with her and grabbed her shoulders. The weight of his hands should have been disconcerting, but it lent a certain solid connection to him she welcomed.
“No, I won’t forget it and you shouldn’t either.”
The hurt vibrating in his voice gripped her. Blinking, she gazed up into his troubled eyes.
Devon’s heart twisted, wringing in agony as tears spilled from the corners of her violet eyes. She tried to pull away, but he held firm, and then moved his hands so now he cupped her face between his palms. With his thumbs, he brushed away the moisture.
He couldn’t fathom having unintentionally hurt her all this time. In his mind, he knew if she hadn’t come with him to live a vagabond life until he finally made it at least he’d done her a favor by leaving her behind, safe and secure in her daddy’s home. But now he knew different and he ached with that knowledge. Her father had thrown her out and everyone she ever cared for had abandoned her. She’d hid the truth for years, but he could see it now. The pain he read in her beautiful eyes tore a chunk out of his heart. How could he do this to her?
Crimes of the Heart (Heart Romance #2) Page 9