“I’m worried about you now.”
“I’m fine. Really. Go get some rest.”
“Do you sleep? I mean in the books...”
“I’m not a vampire!”
“But do you?”
“Quite well, sometimes. Sometimes I have bad dreams. But yes, I do sleep.”
“I’m trying to get this, Brynne, but I’m not sure I’ll wake up tomorrow and believe that any of this was real.”
“Maybe it’s better that way.” I said.
“It’s not better. You’re my best friend. I should know about this. But it’s out there, ya know?”
“Yeah. Sleep tight, Jess.”
I followed her home, at a distance. Behind houses and trees, far enough behind that she wouldn’t know I was there. I had to make sure she got there okay. She cried a lot on the walk, but she seemed okay. She was mumbling that this wasn’t real, but she got it together before she went in the front of her house. When she told her mother goodnight she sounded as happy and chipper as always.
I read some more news stories on the web when I got home. Apparently there’s some gang in Wichita that likes to pretend to be vampires. After beating people up and cutting them, they suck on their necks. If they only knew someone exists that is a lot like a real vampire in so many ways.
The problem with this, of course, is that it brings a lot of attention. Not a bad thing, because those that would kill me for being me see yet more reports of fakes and it lessens the chance that they’ll respond if anyone ever reports me. Alejandro said they were from the Vatican, and he called them the Venator Inmortuorum. The problem is, if they come to investigate so close to where I’m at, and they happen to come through here then it gets dangerous for me. Alejandro thought they could tell what we were by looking. I have no idea how, since I think I look just like any other girl, but he said they would know.
Friday, May 13 Jessica didn’t show up for school. We have two classes together in the morning, and she wasn’t there. I tried to call her house between classes, but nobody answered. I considered going to check on her, but I thought maybe I was the last person on Earth that she’d want to see.
“Brynne, you’re friends with Jessica Sloan, aren’t you?” Mrs. Miller asked me.
“Yes, Ma’am.”
“Is she sick today?”
“I’m not sure. I haven’t heard from her.”
“If you talk to her, can you make sure she reads chapter twenty
this weekend so she’ll be prepared for the test Monday?” “Yes, Mrs. Miller.”
“Thank you, dear.”
It’s weird how this works. The very fact that I don’t get older makes it easier on me in a lot of ways when it comes to school. I start out somewhere as a freshman or sophomore, and by the time I make it to the senior year, assuming I stick around that long, the teachers are all protective and extra nice to me because I’m so much smaller than the other kids and I look like such a little underdog or something. Seriously, I’m tiny and thin, so people seem to have this protective feeling toward me.
At lunch I couldn’t eat. It’s not that I was worried Jessica would tell anyone, because I don’t believe she would. And I’m not worried about her, at least not that she’s sick or hurt. The only thing that worries me is that I’ve lost the only real friend I’ve ever had. The only person I’ve ever let myself really care about.
Instead of eating I went out front and sat under a tree. I had a book from the school library, but my mind was too occupied to read. I was actually kind of staring at the clouds in the distance, zoning out a little. Which I guess is why I didn’t notice her approaching.
“Hey.” she said. She plopped down next to me in the grass. “You’re here!” I threw my arms around her. “Yeah, honey, stop. People are looking.” “Oh Jess, I thought I’d lost you.”
“N‘kay, back off a little, hon.”
“Sorry.”
I backed off and she pulled an apple from her bag and bit into it. She held it out to me, offering me a bite. But then she pulled it back and looked down at it.
“Hey, if I eat after you I’m not going to like die or anything, will I?”
“You’ve eaten after me a million times.”
“Well that’s true.” She held the apple out and I took a bite. “I was so sick last night.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Truth?” she asked. I nodded. “I kept picturing all that blood on your arm. And you,” She glanced around. “I kept thinking of little tiny Brynne, drinking blood from people, killing people.”
“I never should have told you.”
“I’m glad you did.” She said. “I think.” She bit into the apple again. “You actually scare me a little.”
“I’ll never hurt you.”
“I believe that. I do, Brynne. It’s just... you’re not human, ya know? It’s going to take a while for me to get used to that.”
“Time is something I have plenty of.”
“Yeah, I guess you do.”
She chewed her apple and took a napkin and paper sack from her bag, placing the apple core in the bag, and then the napkin after she cleaned herself with it. Then she took out a disposable tooth brush and cleaned her teeth, then placed that in the little sack.
“So explain this not getting older thing?”
“What’s to explain? I don’t get older. At least not much.” “That sounds like a good thing to me. But you make it sound
like a curse.”
“It’s not that I don’t look older, I’m not getting older. All the
crazy hormones and stuff, still going on. Imagine that for over a
century.”
“Yeah. Wow.”
“And then imagine having to leave every friend you have every
couple of years because they’ll start asking questions about your age.
I’ve sometimes worked hard at how I dress and my makeup, and I’ve
pulled off eighteen. It was hard, and people still had comments all the
time about how young I looked.”
“You do look young.” She kind of ran her eyes over me, top to
bottom. “Yeah, younger than fifteen, honestly. Young and innocent. Is
that part of this? Does changing make you beautiful?”
“No.” I felt myself blushing. Also something that never stops
when you change. “And thank you.”
“So this is your life? You stay some place a couple of years,
then have to leave everyone behind. That sucks.”
“It sucks a lot. What also sucks is outliving everyone you care
about at all.”
“Yeah, that does suck.”
“Like one day I know I’ll go to your funeral. And I’ll still be
fifteen.”
“Wow, morbid there, ya know.” she said. “You weren’t
planning on hastening that event, were you?”
“Jess,”
“I’m kidding.”
She’s kidding. She’s making jokes about me killing her? Well that’s a good thing, I think. That means she is becoming at least a little more comfortable with this.
“I went to college a couple of times. Just a year or two here and there before I had to quit because of my age. But it was kind of fun. I studied computers once, and I thought about becoming a teacher, but then I realized how that wouldn’t work.”
“So what about... boys?” she asked. She rolled her eyes at me. “You never date. Have you ever?”
“Yeah. I mean I tried a couple of times, but it’s just not worth it.”
“Because you’re so much older than them?”
“No. And you still don’t get it, I’m not. I’m stuck at fifteen. I feel fifteen, I look fifteen. When I went to college, I had a couple of guys ask me out, but I just wasn't really interested. And I tried going out with them, but then I didn’t have anything in common with them, and I felt like a little kid when I was with them. I’m still just a teen girl.”
“Guys.” She said, rolling her eyes again. I wish she'd stop that. “So you like teenage guys? Then why do you not date, honey?”
“Well, I mean... I don't... know. I mean... so what, I get close to someone and then have to leave?”
“Oh. So, like, could you get pregnant? Could you have a little baby vam... whatever you are? I mean could you?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never tried.”
“You’ve never had sex? In over a hundred and fifty years? With anyone?”
“I’ve never been in love, okay. When I was born it was really uncommon for a good girl to have sex before marriage. My parents would kill me if I did something like that.”
“You’ve lived alone for all this time, no parents, and you’ve managed to stay an innocent little virgin?” She said, fighting to contain her smile.
“Give me a break, Jess.”
She got up and put her trash in a bin, then returned to our spot. She reached up and ruffled my hair. “Does that grow?”
“I’m not dead, Jessica.”
“Does it grow slow, like you age?”
“Yeah, it does. Kills me when it gets messed up, too. It could
take years to grow out if I cut it short.”
“You’re going to be a teenager forever.” she said, smiling. “Not forever, just the next six or seven centuries. Ya know
what sucks is that he changed me too soon. Women in my family sort of develop a little later.”
“So you mean being flat doesn’t run in your family?”
“Come on, I’m not that flat.”
“Okay, okay. Some guys are into that.” she said. She laughed and stuck her arm around me. “Pedophiles.”
“Ha ha. Very funny.”
“So you, what, are attracted to fifteen year olds, too? Since, ya know, you said you’re stuck at that age in every way.”
“Sometimes. But... I mean I don’t know, I’m not that interested in anyone, really. Not right now.”
“So if we could set you up with, say, Sam Finley...”
“Don’t even say that.” Sam Finley is a Junior, and a complete chess geek. “I’m not looking for any relationships right now, okay?”
“Has there ever been anyone really special?”
“No. I’ve never even gone on a second date with a guy. I just never... connect.”
“Well that’s okay, right? You said you’d just have to leave.”
“I guess.”
We got up and headed toward the building. Classes will be starting soon. This has gone exceedingly well. Jessica is still my best friend, even knowing what she knows.
“So why do you bother with school? Why come at all?” she asked.
“Well, where else am I going to go?”
“Anywhere. You could do anything, right?”
“I like school.”
“Freak.”
“I’m a freak for liking school?” I asked. Not for being whatever it is I am?
“Aren’t you bored? Don’t you know all this already?”
“I learn new things all the time. And I like being around people my age.”
“Fine. So just tell me this, then: Where do you get the money to pay for everything, since you don’t have parents supporting you?” She stopped and looked at me with an apology all over her face. “I didn’t mean...”
“It’s okay, I’m used to them being gone by now.”
“Sorry.”
“I have money, okay. For the past few decades the stock market has been good to me. Though I kind of stole the money I originally invested. It was a survival thing, I don’t enjoy taking someone else’s hard earned possessions.”
“How much money do you have?” she asked.
“Does it matter? A lot, I suppose. I’m not even sure.” “So my vampire friend is rich, too?” she said.
“Shh! You have to be more careful.” I said, looking around to make sure nobody heard. “I'm not a vampire!” How many times do I have to say that? “And yes, probably, I am rich. So what, get over it.”
“I work hard, and you...”
“Jess, do you want me to give you money? Seriously? Would it mean anything to you if you didn’t earn it yourself?”
“It’d be nice to not have to worry about it all the time.” she said.
“Stop worrying. Trust me, if you ever need anything, really need anything, then you’ll have it. If I have to break into Fort Knox, you’ll have it.”
“Do you break into places a lot?”
“Not anymore. Not now that I can buy whatever I want.”
“And yet you don’t have a cell phone.”
“Who would I call?”
“Yeah, well how about me?” she said.
“But we see each other all the time.”
“Whatever. I should get to class. Talk to you later, honey.”
I guess it’s probably my fault that I don’t have many friends at school. I mean I work hard to remain distant. And while I do that on purpose, because I always try to limit the people I’ll miss when I leave, it sometimes gets lonely. And nobody even bothers to try to talk to me most of the time. I walk down the hallway, almost invisible, never talking to anyone. Usually.
“You need to try out for cheerleading next year.” Sharon Tremain said to me. There are always exceptions to this nobody talking thing.
“What?” It surprised me to be asked to do that. “You’re small, you’d be easy to throw.”
“Um,” We have a competitive cheerleading squad here, and
they go to the national competitions every year. “I... can’t. Sorry.” “Why not?” she asked. She looks angry now.
“Weren’t we in gym class together last year?” I asked her. “Oh yeah, that’s right. Never mind.”
She trudged away. We did have gym class together, and I was terrible in it. I was slow, I was uncoordinated, I couldn’t serve a volleyball and couldn’t hit a basket with the basketball. I ran out of breath easily and had to stop when we ran the mile, I couldn’t do even the one pull up the coach asked of us, and I was always the last person picked when we teamed up for anything. All of it was on purpose, of course, but it has worked wonders, and everyone pretty much thinks of me as a little wimp, and leaves me alone because of it. Of course there have been times when someone pushed me around, but because I’m so tiny and wimpy there’s usually someone coming to my aid.
School was slow and boring. Jess is right, I don’t really need to do this. What are they going to do, throw me in jail for truancy? I have to forge papers just to get into school all the time. I mean if I have to show a birth certificate anywhere I can’t exactly whip one out from eighteen fifty six, can I? I never actually had one, honestly.
“Hey Boo-boo.” Jess called out to me. She says I remind her of Yogi’s friend, somehow. I don’t get it. “Wait up.”
“Do I need to bring anything tomorrow? I can get some chips
or burger or something.”
“Nah, Mom and Dad already got everything.” She put her hand
on my shoulder. “You should come with me and Tony tonight.”
Tony is her sometimes boyfriend. They go to the movies a lot, but that’s about it. They don’t even go to dances, or out to nice restaurants or anything. Mostly they are movie buddies. I think that’s her choice, not his. She’s just not that into him. He’s sort of in the ‘just friends’ box. Poor guy doesn’t even realize it, either. I don't know if he knows how lucky he is to have her either, though.
“I’m not going to be a third wheel.” I told her.
“Well I don’t like you sitting alone all the time.”
“Puh!” I shoved her shoulder playfully. “You worry now?” “Ow.” she said, fake look of hurt on her face as she rubbed her
shoulder. “Before I had no idea you were sitting alone all the time. I thought you at least had your parents around.”
“I’m okay, Jess. Don’t worry.”
“What about those people?” she said. She glanced arou
nd, then leaned closer. “The ones you said would kill you if they knew.” “It’s not like they’re looking for me, they just don’t know I exist. Alejandro said I should keep it low and they’ll never come looking for me. The people, the hunters, the Venator Inmortuorum, from the Vatican... They think they wiped out all of us, they don’t know there’s one left.” At least I don’t think so.
“Yeah, about that,” She led me away from the other students. “You’ve gone to church with my family. How does that work?”
“What’ya mean?”
“It’s like, consecrated ground, so how can you enter?”
“I’m not a vampire!”
“Okay, okay. I just meant... well, can you like, touch a cross, or does it hurt you?”
“Ya know, I know this is all new to you, and it’ll take a while to adjust to, but you keep assuming I’m some kind of evil monster. It actually sort of hurts my feelings.”
“No, Brynne honey, I didn’t mean it like that.” She hugged me. “You’re my best friend, I know you’re not evil.”
“Yeah, anyway,” Time to get out of this conversation. “You and Tony have fun tonight. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“What do you do at night?”
“I read. I walk around. You’d be surprised how entertaining it can be to sit in the dark somewhere and listen to people who don’t know you’re there.”
“Seriously?”
“Well,” I shrugged. The way she said that made me feel a little guilty. “It’s not like I peek in people’s windows or anything. I just... have good ears. Anyway, I do have a television, ya know? And I have... don’t laugh at me, but I have a very extensive doll collection that I sort of... pose into scenes, I guess.”
“You play with your dollies.” she said in a baby voice. “That is so cute.”
“Sto-op.” This is embarrassing.
“Okay, so, have fun with your dolls tonight. I’ll see you in the morning, hon.”
“Later.”
I sat on my nice, cushy sofa, with my dolls lined up on the coffee table. Yeah, it is kind of childish. I don’t care. When I was growing up I didn’t have dolls like this. We spent the last year of my normal life moving across the country in a wagon and worrying about being attacked by Indians. Before that, I spent most of my time working with my mother, cleaning the clothes, making the meals, washing things, milking cows, feeding animals. Back then it took hours to make a meal. There were no microwaves or electric ranges, no prepackaged food. It was hard work.
Brynne, Non-Vampire (The Non-Vampire Series) Page 2