“Not funny, Jax, and what’s up with her and Mick?”
“I’m choosing to not go there. Sometimes, in life, ignorance really is bliss.”
We head into Junior’s room, ready as I’ll ever be, to face what I know are going to be some very difficult times ahead.
WE HEAD INTO JUNIOR’S room and seeing him laughing and playing puts everything into perspective. I know I have to do this for him. Antonia is sitting in her baby recliner, laughing and kicking her feet, not a care in the world; as life should be. I feel her arms wrap around my waist and it’s a comfort, it’s home.
“I’m glad you made it back safe, I was worried.”
“I was never in danger, sweetheart, only James was. We got what we needed. He’s a perfect match and will be donating stem cells.”
“At what price, Jax?”
I turn around so I can see her eyes, they ground me. “What makes you ask that?”
“Any man, who could do the things he has done, would never do a kind act without wanting something. So what price are we going to have to pay?”
“He wants to meet Junior.” I can barely get the words out, my stomach in knots at the sheer thought of it.
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh. Mick recorded everything, which I’m glad he thought to do. Max already listened to it, but Bella still has to. In the end, she will have to go along with it. Sometimes, in life, there really is no choice. When the day comes that they have to meet, I don’t want you or Antonia anywhere near here. Please don’t fight me on this, allow me a little peace of mind . . . please.”
“Okay, I can do that. Why don’t you go spend some time with Michael? Tony sent him something very special that he’s been bursting to tell you about.”
I make my way further into the room and Junior sees me. He comes running and leaps into my arms. “Hey, guess you’re excited to see me.”
“Oh, you are not going to believe what Tony sent! Hurry up, I have to show you. He designed a gaming system and he wants me to test it out for him. And guess what, Uncle Jax, the very first game he made is a Doctor Who game. It’s so cool! I know it’s going to be a big hit.” I put him down and he’s still going on and on about the wonders of the game. It doesn’t matter who Junior’s real father is, it’s the love and nurturing that’s made him the fantastic kid he is.
“Uncle Jax, are you okay?”
“Yeah, now let’s see what this bad boy can do.”
JAX MADE IT BACK okay but he looks really bad, I’m worried. What if Dad isn’t a match or what if he won’t agree to be tested, what will I do? Playing with Michael always seems to bring him back to life.
Max puts his arm around my waist and kisses may forehead. “Bella, let’s go get a cup of tea.” He says low enough so only I can hear.
“Are you going to be delivering bad news?” He doesn’t say anything as we head to the cafe.
“First, I will tell you the good news is our father is a perfect match. He has agreed to the donation. The paperwork is being processed now.”
“And the bad news? He cocks his head, lifts his eyebrows, and tightens his grip around my waist. “Don’t look at me like that, Max, we both know he’s got to want something.”
“Mick recorded the entire conversation. I know that—no matter what—you will do what you have to in order to save Junior. If you don’t want to listen to it, you don’t have to. The choice is yours,” he offers.
“I want to listen to it, but will you stay with me?”
He hands me a headset. “I will, if you put these on. I don’t know that I can listen to it ever again.”
Max gets tea and I know it’s that act not the tea that is comforting. I press play. His voice is deep and raspy . . . not what I was expecting. My poor mum having to listen to him, reminding her of her naivety. I understand why Max can’t listen to this again. He could have saved them. “Ah” I gasp and drop my cup, my whole body begins to shake. Max races over and pulls the headset off.
“Shh, I’ve got you.”
“M-max, could it be I was raped because of him? He wants to meet my son. That’s the price I have to pay? He’s a sick and twisted person.” He lifts me up and carries me out of the cafe. I can’t stop shaking. What kind of person would ever let their child go through what I did? If he knew Miguel was that crazy, why didn’t he protect his family? Instead, it’s like he threw us to the wolves. Oh dear God, how can I do this?
I finally stop shaking. I open my eyes, but it’s dark and I have no clue where I am. I only know that I’m in Max’s arms and he’s rocking me like a child.
“Were are we?”
“A quiet room off the solarium; you’re safe.”
“How am I going to do this? I have no choice, I know that, but . . . how can I look at him? Why does it have to be him who can save my son?”
“Bella, look at me. Jax and I will be with you the entire time. We will explain to Junior what is going on. We will get through this, and then, we never have to see him again. Meeting Junior is not going to give him redemption. In his eyes, he’s doing something good. But, one good act doesn’t erase all the bad. When you do something good for someone, you do it because you want to, with no ulterior motives. He will always be damned to hell and nothing he does will ever change that.”
“What about you? Are you going to be able to do this without killing him?”
“I will do whatever I have to for my nephew and if it means I have to deal with him, then so be it. We need to get back before we are missed. Are you ready?”
I get up and wipe my face as best I can. “I am a very lucky girl to have two of the best brothers in the world.”
“Jax and I want to tell him in the morning, if that’s okay with you.”
“That’s fine. So what happened that everyone moved out of Mr. Gerhard’s home very quickly?”
“Can’t get nothing past you, can I?”
“Nope, eventually I find out everything. I’m worse than Mum.”
“Dylan came back and was causing a scene. The whole thing didn’t feel right. Then we found out that he is in financial trouble and dealing with some shady characters. Best to be in our own place. Besides, that was just a place to regroup after fleeing the States.”
We step back into the room and find Jax and Michael asleep with the remotes in their hands. Raven comes up and gives me a hug. “Are you okay, Bella?”
“Yeah, I will be. I see they are out cold. I can’t tell you how many nights I’ve found them like that. If you take the remote out of Jax’s hand, he will wake right up.” I walk over, take the remote, and just like always . . .”Bella, I’m playing.”
“Jax, go home; everyone is tired. I promise you can come back tomorrow and play again.”
Everyone makes their goodbyes. Now I have to explain everything to my husband. I’m not looking forward to this conversation. Once again, I have no choice.
I crawl onto Michael’s lap and begin to tell him everything. He surprises me by remaining calm and agreeing to everything. “What happened? Why are you so calm?”
“I told you, I would do whatever I had to do to save my son.”
“What about your parents? Are you still going to have them meet Michael?”
“Yes, it’s time, Bella. I am willing to let them try. In the end, it’s my son’s decision if he wants a relationship with them.”
I snuggle into him, “You are such a kind man. I love you.”
“Ti amo più della vita stessa e amerò sempre.”
“It sounds beautiful, whatever it means.”
“Oh, Bella, someday you will learn my language. I said, I love you more than life itself, and I always will.”
WE FINALLY GET TO the estate and it’s extremely secluded, even more so than the Gerhard compound. Electric fence and armed guards; God only knows what the house is like. Jax has his head on my shoulder and he is asleep. He hasn’t given me any details of what happened today only that James is a match. I can’t believe that An climbed out the ba
throom window. She is always surprising me, but she probably knew that was the only way she would get to go.
“Jax, wake up; were here.” He opens his eyes and throws his arms around me.
“Hey, we’re safe. I’m here.” My heart is breaking for him. God only knows what went down today. It’s eating him up inside.
He grabs Antonia’s carrier and we all head inside. The place is huge and fully staffed, something I’m never comfortable with. Max is already going over all the details with the head of security. Mrs. Osla must be able to tell that I’m at a loss here. She takes out a chart and begins assigning rooms.
“Thank you, Mrs. Osla, we would be very lost without you.” She doesn’t take compliments well and shoos me away.
“Jax, I’m going to get Antonia ready for bed, and then I’m going to soak in the tub. When you’re done here, please join me.”
“Of course, I’ll be up in a minute. I want to go over some stuff with Max before we turn in.”
MRS. OSLA DIRECTS EVERYONE to their rooms while I drag Max into the den. “Okay, what happened with Bella? I wanted to be there when she heard the recording.”
“You can’t be everywhere, Jax. You were gone for a good portion of the day and Junior really wanted to spend some time with you. I stayed with Bella the whole time. She was destroyed to find out about the rape. In the end, she knows she has to let him meet Junior. She wants it to be very quick and she was going to explain everything to Michael tonight. She also wants you and me there when she tells Junior about James.”
“I’m not sure the kid can take much more. Rose’s death hit him really hard. Michael’s family will be coming sometime soon. Not only will he be meeting them for the first time but also James. You know how important state of mind is; I’m worried.”
“I understand what you’re saying, but we don’t have a choice. James attached a condition on giving the stem cells. Granted he didn’t say he would withhold them, but after listening to that recording, there is no doubt in my mind that is his intention.”
“Maybe we can get him in and out very quickly. Do we know how long the procedure is?”
“I spoke to the doctor and he said they do two different procedures. The one like Jackie had where then remove the stem cells from the bone marrow in the hip. The other is a procedure called peripheral blood stem cell donation. The donor is given injections of Filgrastim to aid in cell reproduction. He said he uses both, especially after chemo. From the sound of it, I don’t think it’s a quick thing. Look, whatever it is, we will have to deal with it.”
“How the hell are we going to do this without losing it? You don’t know how hard it was.”
“Mick told me you had him around the throat. You’re a better man than me; I would have snapped his neck.”
“That’s my point, Max. How the fuck are we going to do this? I think I’ve spent what little control I had. You’re talking about being around him for days. I don’t want my family around him at all. I think his meeting with Junior should be hi and goodbye.”
“That’s not realistic. What will you do if Junior says he wants to get to know him, have you thought about that?”
“Get to know him?! Have you lost your bloody mind?”
“He’s a nine-year-old boy who knows nothing about James or anything that he’s done. All he knows is what he’s been told; keep that in mind.”
“I’ll negotiate with Junior, he will listen to me.”
“Look, it’s been a long, emotional day, let’s get some sleep and we can deal with this in the morning.”
“Okay, except I have no clue where my room is, so lead the way.” He’s right, it’s been a long day and the only thing I’m looking forward to right now is getting lost within my beautiful wife.
I HOPE JAX WON’T be too long. When he’s with Max, they tend to lose track of time. I like this house. Tony did a good job of finding it and getting everything set up so quickly. We have access to Antonia’s room right through ours, which is perfect. Hopefully, this will be our last move for quiet some time. I peak in her crib; I could watch her sleep all night long but I want to get the tub set up for Jax. He’s had two emotional days back to back and he needs to unwind. I go about setting everything up when I hear him come in. My God, he looks like a beaten man. My heart is breaking for him.
“Jax, let me take care of you tonight, please. We will have a nice soak in this beautiful tub, and you can just close out the world for awhile.”
“That sounds good to me. I really need to be alone with you.”
I pour him a glass of wine, and then help him get undressed. “Climb in and I will sit behind you so I can massage your shoulders.”
“Wow, take-charge-Raven is here tonight. It’s okay; I need her to help me forget my horrific day.”
“Is that your way of telling me you don’t want to talk about it?”
“Part of me wants to yell and punch something and the other part of me wants to close my eyes and forget this whole week has ever happened,” he groans. I keep massaging his neck and shoulders. I know if I wait long enough, he will tell me everything.
“When Bella came back with Max, she was very upset. You were sleeping, but do you know what happened?”
“Yeah, she listened to the recording.”
“What recording?”
He takes in a deep breath, and then tells me about Mick recording the whole confrontation with his father. Both Max and Bella have listened to it. “How bad was it?”
“Bad, sweetheart, really bad.” He leans his head back and continues to tell me what happened. He admitted a lot of stuff that made it seem like he just used my mum and Cindy. He thought Cindy’s death was accidental. Then he wanted to take Max and hook back up with my mum but she was already in the States. Apparently that photograph with the four men was a bone of contention for Miguel who by the way is James’s cousin.”
“Ah, no Max is related to the man that killed his family?”
“He’s a cousin through marriage. When Max became a cop, Miguel wanted our father to turn him. When he couldn’t, he killed Samantha and Elliot. Our father was in the park that day and knew what was going to happen. He could have stopped it and he didn’t.”
“Oh, how sick is that?”
“Wait, there’s more. He believes that Miguel was behind Bella’s rape.”
“That’s why she was so upset. Bella knows this now. Oh, how sad. All these years she blamed herself, like she did something wrong, but, in essence, it was all planed.”
“You want to know what the kicker is? He is a perfect match for Junior. I offered him fifty-million dollars in cash for his donation, but the only thing he wants is to meet Junior. Bella has no choice; she’s going to have to do it. I’m telling you now, Raven, I don’t want you or Antonia anywhere near my father.”
I pull him tightly up against my chest. “I have no desire to ever meet James and he will never get near our daughter. I’m worried about Michael Jr., though. I don’t know how much more that boy can take. Bella told me that Michael’s parents are also being tested and want to finally meet their grandson. This is an awful lot for a nine-year-old to deal with.”
“Max told me tonight about Michael’s parents. I give Michael a lot of credit. I don’t know that I could be as strong as he is. When he told his parents what happened to Bella and that he was marrying her, they said some pretty harsh stuff. They weren’t dating very long and I admire him for his choices. I was prepared to take care of her and Junior for the rest of my life. I told you that Max was part owner of Raiders, but what I didn’t tell you is that Junior owned a higher percentage than Max. It’s all in a trust for him. He has no clue, but if he never wanted to work a day in his life, he wouldn’t have to. The only person who knows about it is Max and now, you. Not even Bella knows. I never wanted money to get in the way of their lives.”
“Why didn’t you tell Bella?”
“Can you imagine the creeps that would have come out of the woodwork if they knew that a sing
le mum has a son who’s worth a fortune? Michael came to me when Bella was about seven months pregnant and asked for her hand in marriage. I told him no and sent him away. The next day, Bella came to me crying and begged me for my blessing. Again, I said no. So, she said she would get married without it. The fight was huge and finally, my mum sat the three of us in a room to hash it out. I offered to pay Michael to go away.”
“Wow, I know you can be tough, but that was very harsh.”
“Maybe, but there was a lot at stake and I’m not talking about money. Whomever she chose would be around Junior and that was my sticking point. I didn’t doubt that he loved her, he showed her in so many ways. I had blinders on when it came to the baby. Finally, I agreed to the wedding, but there were certain things that had to happen. A prenup had to be in place. He had to agree that the baby would be brought up Catholic. He had to agree that if they split up, he would have no legal rights to the child. He had to agree to it all before I would say yes. His parents said if he married her, they would disown him. They said Bella was using him for his name and for money. He walked away from his family, and they got married. Then Bella had major complications with her pregnancy. It was so bad that, at one point, we called in a priest. She’s tough and pulled through, but she can’t have any more children. Michael stood beside her the entire time, even though he knew he would never have a child of his own. I admire him for that more than I could ever explain.”
“I didn’t know that she went through all of that, she never really talked about her pregnancy. I wonder why Michael is forgiving his parents now.”
“Max and I tease Michael all the time, telling him that he is up for sainthood being married to Bella. In reality, he is a very kind man and maybe after all of this, he realizes, like the rest of us, that life is short, and it can change on a dime.”
“Do you feel like you got the answers from James that you were looking for?”
“Actually, yeah, I did. It had nothing to do with me or Bella. He never wanted us; we were his mistake. His attitude made me sick—we had his wonderful DNA and everything we accomplished was because of it. You can imagine how well that went over with me.”
Shattered Lies Page 30