Prescription for Chaos

Home > Other > Prescription for Chaos > Page 22
Prescription for Chaos Page 22

by Christopher Anvil


  As Randy groped for words, she said, "Now I must run," and left.

  From the repair shop down the hall came a curse from Mike the technician, who hardly ever swore.

  Randy massaged his temples, opened the word processor box, and found no instructions. Where was whatever literature Snapper Software had included with this thing?

  The outer door opened. The mailman tossed some bills on the counter and went out.

  Randy, examining the Shomizota printer, found a big envelope, dumped the contents, and sheets of Chinese-Japanese characters looked up at him.

  Randy drew a careful breath, and reminded himself that he only had to get through the rest of the day. Then it was home to his Cougar and Armagast's program.

  He glanced up as the doorlatch clicked again. A well dressed man came in with a precocious-looking boy carrying a Gnat computer. Stewart emerged from his office, a crumpled bill in his fist, to whirl as a crash and a string of oaths echoed down the hall from the repair shop.

  It suddenly dawned on Randy that the Computer Age's bugs weren't confined to the hardware and software. There were humanware bugs, and he was about to see them crash the system.

  He was scarcely aware of his brief silent prayer as he approached his boss. "Excuse me, Mr. Rafer. Mike mentioned something yesterday, and I should have passed it on to you. If I could see you just a moment—"

  Stewart eyed the Gnat, glanced toward the repair shop, excused himself to the customer, and stepped into his office.

  Randy kept his voice low. "Mike said he can't handle the Gnat repairs plus the forty-eight-hour fix we've been promising. If he decides to quit, we're sunk. Let me promise him we'll forget the 48-hour till the Gnats are out of the way."

  Stewart hesitated, then nodded. "But hurry up. He's about to erupt."

  Randy, moving fast, knocked on the repair shop door, and stepped inside.

  "Mike, excuse me. I told Stew you needed more time, and he agreed. He says you can forget the 48-hour fix till you've had time enough to get the Gnats out of the way."

  Mike looked at him wildly. "Nobody could keep up with this!"

  "Don't try. Take it as slow as you have to. We appreciate your trying, but anybody can only do so much."

  "Forget the 48-hour fix?"

  "Till the Gnats are out of the way. I think we're almost at the end of them."

  Mike blew out his breath. "Okay. I can live with that." He bent down and set a dented wastebasket upright. "Push over that stool, will you, and shut the door tight when you go out. Thanks for talking to Stew."

  Randy, coming back down the hall, heard Stewart talking to the customer: ". . . any amount of trouble from these Gnats, but we'll back up the warranty as best we can. My hardware specialist warned me about the machine, but I didn't believe him."

  Randy stopped in his tracks. Was he still stuck in Armagast's program? Why was Stewart being reasonable? Then it dawned on him—Stewart had used the program, too.

  The customer was saying, "As long as you'll back up my son's Gnat, I'll ask you something else. What do you have that's reliable?"

  "I—ah—"

  "I don't need the latest electronic miracle. I need a machine I can count on."

  Stewart glanced at Randy, who mentally shifted gears.

  "There's the Sharke II. That's been very thoroughly debugged."

  Stewart objected. "It won't run the latest software. The Superbyte is faster, has a lot more RAM, more—" He paused. With an effort, he said, "But the II is very reliable. That's true." He excused himself.

  Randy spoke carefully, straining not to be like any salesman he'd met recently in Armagast's program. "Mr. Rafer is right that the Superbyte is faster, and has more capabilities. But the Sharke II is very reliable, has excellent instruction manuals, comes with a good deal of useful software, and costs a lot less."

  "Okay. Let me have some literature, and I'll be back when my son's Gnat is fixed to look this machine over. And—speaking of my son, where—"

  A beeping noise became evident, from the back of a post on the other side of which was the Sharke Graphics 1000. The customer smiled, took the literature, got his protesting son loose from the Graphics 1000, and went out. Randy sat down by the Shomizota printer, thinking.

  Stewart came back into the showroom.

  Randy looked up. "He said he'd be back to look at the II when we get the Gnat fixed. I don't think it was a stunt to hurry us up. I think he wants a reliable computer even if it's behind the time."

  "No matter what you buy just now, it will be behind the times pretty quick."

  "It's a point." Randy frowned. "There's something here—some—"

  "New approach to the consumer market? Possibly the industry has enough wonders for now, and ought to refine them?"

  "Maybe, but also, there's a—a problem with people, aside from computers. And we're all people."

  Stewart nodded. "It's almost sunk us. We've got a computer/human interface problem. Plus an expert/novice interface problem. But that Armagast program, anyway, was a good buy." He went back to his office.

  Randy eyed the Shomizota printer he was supposed to make work with the Sharke Superbyte. Possibly he could get it to work despite the problems. Would that make him a sucker—or would it be good salesmanship?

  From some dimly remembered book or article came a quote—"Send one customer away happy or mad, and you win or lose six others." That customer would tell his friends—Was it, maybe, sixteen others? Frowning, Randy remembered an earlier thought—there are bugs in human nature. And one was to expect everything of the new, while overlooking the familiar. Since computers involved so many things that were new, had the industry junked an unusual number of reliable truths?

  At that moment, Stewart came back into the room and glanced at the printer.

  "Any luck?"

  "The documentation seems to be in Japanese. I have a hunch she got this from some friend who stopped off in Tokyo. But I'll see if I can get it."

  Stewart nodded approvingly. "I just had a thought. That Armagast program seems to induce a—ah—a problem-solving approach. Now—Why shouldn't Mort have the advantage of it? True, he's part-time, but, just between you and me—"

  "Yes. Good idea. I'll mention to him how interesting the program is."

  "He'll be in Tuesday. I'll bring my machine. It should be a good test for the program."

  Randy grinned. "I'll still bet on Armagast."

  "If it works, we'll know he's really got something."

  Stewart went back to his office, and Randy pried off the cover of the printer.

  From some recess of his memory came a rough rendering of another comment, and this time he remembered who had said it—"If you have trouble in your organization, it will usually be people trouble. Therefore, value those who can solve people trouble."

  As Randy eyed the printer's switches, unconsciously he adapted Andrew Carnegie's thoughts to his own line of work:

  "If you have trouble with bugs, they may be hardware bugs or software bugs, but almost always they're the result of people. Therefore, value what can solve the trickiest bugs of all—people bugs."

  THE FREE ENTERPRISE

  Positive Feedback

  SCHRAMM'S GARAGE

  To: Jack W. Bailey

  413 Crescent Drive

  City

  Parts: 1 set 22-638 brushes$1.18

  Labor: overhaul generator

  set regulator

  clean battery terminals$11.00

  total$12.18

  Note: Time for oil change and install new filter.

  Noticed car seemed to pull to the left when we stepped on

  the brake.

  Can take care of it Wednesday if you want.

  Joe Schramm

  Dear Joe:

  Check for $12.18 enclosed.

  Will see about the oil change and filter later. The kids have been sick and we're going broke at this rate.

  Maybe it pulls to the left, but I haven't noticed it.

&n
bsp; Jack Bailey

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Mr. Joseph Schramm

  Schramm's Garage

  1428 West Ave.

  Crescent City

  Dear Mr. Schramm:

  Enclosed find literature on our new Automated Car Service Handling Machine.

  With this great new machine, you can service anything from a little imported car to a big truck. The Handling Machine just picks the vehicle up, and the Glider on its Universal Arm enables your mechanic to get at any part, from above or below. By just turning a few knobs, he glides right to the spot on the end of the Arm. Power grapples, twisters, engine-lifters, transmission-holders, dozen-armed grippers and wrasslers—all these make the toughest job easy.

  If you've got a dozen mechanics, buy this machine and you can get along with three or four.

  This machine will be the best buy of your life.

  Truly yours,

  G. Wrattan

  Sales Manager

  * * *

  SCHRAMM'S GARAGE

  Dear Mr. Wrattan:

  This machine of yours would take up my whole shop. It's all-electric, and looks to me as if it would take the Government to pay the electric bills. Your idea that I could buy this thing and then let most of my mechanics go is a little dull. When business gets bad, I can always let them go. But with this monster machine of yours, I couldn't let anybody go, except the few guys I still had, who would be my best mechanics.

  Do you know how hard it is to find a good mechanic?

  Let's have the prices and information on your line of hydraulic jacks. Spare me the million-dollar-Robot-Garage stuff.

  Yours truly,

  J. Schramm

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Mr. Joseph Schramm

  Schramm's Garage

  1428 West Ave.

  Crescent City

  Dear Mr. Schramm:

  Enclosed find prices and literature on our complete line of hydraulic jacks, jack-stands, and lifts.

  Mr. Schramm, we feel that you do not fully appreciate the advantages of our great new Automated Car Service Handling Machine. This machine will more than pay for itself in speed, efficiency, and economical service. In bad times you could still cut down your repair staff. Mr. Schramm, one man can operate this machine.

  We are enclosing a new brochure on this wonderful new labor-and-expense-saving machine, which will turn your garage into an ultramodern Servicatorium.

  Cordially,

  G. Wrattan

  Sales Manager

  * * *

  SCHRAMM'S GARAGE

  Dear Mr. Wrattan:

  I'm enclosing an order sheet for jack and stands.

  Your new brochure on your wonderful new labor and-expense-saving machine went straight into the furnace.

  I think you are going to have plenty of trouble selling this machine. The reason is, all you're doing is to think how nice it will be for you if somebody buys it, not how lousy it will be for him to have the thing.

  This machine will take cable as thick as my arm for the juice to run all those motors. It's bound to break down, and while I'm repairing it, I'm out of business.

  You say I can let all my mechanics go but one. You must have a loose ground somewhere. If I fire all my mechanics but one, and he runs this machine, who's the boss then?

  I could tell you what to do with this great new machine of yours, but I don't think you would do it.

  Yours truly,

  J. Schramm

  * * *

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Interoffice Memo

  To: W. W. Sanson, Pres.

  Dear Mr. Sanson:

  I am sending up a large envelope containing sample letters, from garages all over the country.

  The response we've had on Handling Machines has been unusually large and emphatic, but unfortunately it has not been favorable.

  G. Wrattan

  * * *

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Interoffice Memo

  To: G. Wrattan, Sales Mgr.

  Dear Wrattan:

  There are going to have to be some drastic changes around here.

  Bring all the letters you have up to my office at once.

  Sanson

  * * *

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Mr. Joseph Schramm

  Schramm's Garage

  1428 West Ave.

  Crescent City

  Dear Mr. Schramm:

  There have been big changes at Superdee! Exciting changes!

  Following a complete overhaul of top engineering management personnel, things are moving again!

  Superdee is on the march!

  Leading the van is our revamped ultramodern Supramatic Car Service Handling Machine, capable of repairing anything from a little foreign car to a huge truck! Fast! Economical! Efficient!

  This new version embodies the most advanced methods, together with the actual suggestions of practical automotive repairmen like yourself!

  This machine is hydraulically operated, and even has a special High Efficiency Whirlamatic Hand Pump in case of emergency power failure!

  There's practicality!

  There's real manufacturer co-operation!

  You asked for it! Here it is!

  Superdee is on the march!

  Are you?

  Cordially,

  G. Wrattan

  Sales Mgr.

  * * *

  SCHRAMM'S GARAGE

  Dear Mr. Wrattan:

  I am enclosing an order for one of your new Superdeeluxe jacks.

  I have read the stuff about your new Supramatic Machine. This one doesn't take as much space, and seems to be pretty good.

  But I can't afford it.

  Yours truly,

  J. Schramm

  * * *

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Interoffice Memo

  To: W. W. Sanson, Pres.

  Dear Mr. Sanson:

  Well, we've sold three of them.

  G. Wrattan

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Interoffice Memo

  To: G. Wrattan, Sales Mgr.

  Dear Wrattan:

  We've got to do better than this or we'll all be lined up at the employment office in just about six months.

  How about a big advertising campaign?

  Sanson

  * * *

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Interoffice Memo

  To: W. W. Sanson, Pres.

  Dear Mr. Sanson:

  It won't work. This machine would theoretically improve just about any fair-sized repair shop's efficiency, but it's still too expensive.

  To judge by the response, we now have an acceptable Handler here. In time, it's bound to take hold, despite the cost, and obtain wide acceptance.

  But this won't happen in six months.

  G. Wrattan

  * * *

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Interoffice Memo

  To: W. Robert Schnitzer, Mgr. Special Services Dept.

  Dear Schnitzer:

  Since you ran the computerized market simulation, on the basis of which we made this white elephant, I suggest you now find some way to unload it.

  I would hate to be the man whose recommendations, presented in the guise of scientific certainty, were so disastrous that they destroyed the company that paid his salary.

  A reputation such as that could make it quite difficult to find another job.

  Sanson

  * * *

  SUPERDEE EQUIPMENT

  Interoffice Memo

 

‹ Prev