I focused. A steel box, impossible to open. Smooth and solid. Impenetrable.
After a few minutes, I felt like it was real, and strong.
Ready?
I nodded.
I felt Nain’s presence trying to make its way into my mind. It was almost physical. I could feel him inspecting the box, searching the sides, the corners, the top and bottom for signs of weakness. He started pushing at it, then harder. I focused on making the box stronger, holding it together. I felt sweat break out on my forehead, felt my box giving way under his power, and felt the full force of him in my mind.
He gasped and pulled back. I opened my eyes and looked at him.
“What did you see?”
“A young woman’s body. Abandoned building.”
I nodded. Made sense. Living nightmares and all that.
“Your mind is very strong. Your thoughts are clear. It almost feels like I’m living in them.”
“Is that different than usual?”
“Yes. Usually, stored thoughts have a fuzzy quality to them. Things people are thinking or envisioning right that moment are crystal clear. The older the memory, the fuzzier they are.”
“I haven’t had much experience looking for old thoughts. I have only dealt with the immediate ones.”
He nodded. “Again.”
I rebuilt my shield, tried to make it stronger. We went through it all again. It took him longer this time, and I could hear his breathing escalate with effort, as mine did. He finally made it in, and I groaned in annoyance. He didn’t leave right away, and I tried to push his presence out of my mind. He didn’t budge.
Rage filled me. “Nain, get out,” I said, opening my eyes.
He did. He met my eyes, and I saw the anger I was feeling from him reflected there.
“Jesus Christ. What did you see?”
“A basement. A man.”
“Enough,” I said, standing up. “This lesson is over. Fuck.”
He stood up too. “I don’t choose what to see.”
“I know.” It still didn’t make it any less mortifying.
“Who was he?”
“A dead man,” I said, heading toward the stairwell. Walked out of the loft and promised myself I wouldn’t be coming back.
Chapter Six
Of course, I went back. Between Nain calling and annoying/threatening me, and Brennan reasoning with me (something that annoyed me to no end) I finally agreed to go back. And, after a lengthy tirade about what would happen to Nain’s nether regions if he didn’t get out when I told him to, we got down to training again.
I’d managed to hold out for three days. The part of me that hated being told what to do, that just wanted to be left the hell alone, did its best to stay away. But the more reasonable part of my brain knew that if I wanted to learn how to control my powers, how to keep myself safe, I had to go back. I tried not to think about the whole demon thing….that was just too much. I practiced building my shield almost constantly, practiced holding it. It gave me a migraine every single time, but I felt like I was improving. It didn’t take as long to build it now, and it felt, to me at least, a bit stronger than it did when Nain had first taught me how to shield.
So Nain and I ended up on the roof again, miserable summer sun beating down on us, and he worked at me. It took a lot longer each time, and I was feeling pretty smug. Finally, after several long minutes and both of us ending up breathless, he finally made it in.
“Out,” I ordered. I felt Nain pull back, and I opened my eyes. He was watching me, and, as always, whatever I felt from him had a note of anger mixed in that set my teeth on edge. His knees were touching mine, and I tried not to think about it too much, about the fact that physical contact with him made me feel like I could do just about anything, that there was an elation I felt at the merest touch from him that made zero sense. I was also too stubborn to move away. Especially since it didn’t seem to have any effect on him at all. Bastard.
“You’ve improved a lot, Molls. Damn, your mind is strong.”
“What did you see?”
“You. You were a kid. And three boys were picking on you in an alley. You gave two of them bloody noses and kicked one in the balls, and they ran away.” Humor rolled off of him, glinted in his eyes.
“Yeah. That was a good day,” I said, laughing despite the headache that was coming on. “Are these ever going to stop?” I asked, rubbing my temples.
“They won’t happen as quickly, once you get used to it. But with the amount of power you draw, it’s likely that you’ll always have them.”
“Why?”
He looked as if he was thinking. “Our powers have a cost. The brain, even the supernatural or demonic brain, really wasn’t meant to withstand the pressures telepaths put them through.”
“My body hurts like hell when I self-heal,” I said.
He nodded. “Right. There’s always a cost. And even with our powers, there’s only so much we can do. Learning our limits and knowing when we’re in danger of pulling too much and getting tapped out is important. It’s something you’re going to have to watch out for, more than most of us.”
“Am I really pulling that much more power?” I asked, cocking my head to the side.
Nain nodded. “Brennan is the closest in power to you. He’s crazy strong, compared to even most magic users. Both of his parents were powerful shifters. When he’s around, I can feel a pulse, an energy signature that is undeniably him. It’s there, and it’s obvious, but it’s not distracting.”
I nodded. It was the same thing I felt around Brennan. “And me?”
“Being near you is like being locked in a windowless room with a tornado. Your power courses through you. It roars. It’s suffocating.”
I raised my eyebrow. That was similar to what I felt from him, but I thought he was being a bit of a drama queen about it. “Really? All the time?”
Nain nodded.
“It must be really irritating to be around me, then,” I said, grinning in spite of how freaked out I was.
“For many reasons,” he said wryly, and I shook my head. “Back to work.”
Nain was still hammering at my mind when his phone rang.
“Okay. Break,” he said, irritation flowing from him. “You were really doing well that time.” Indeed. Sweat glistened on his forehead, and the neck of his t-shirt was soaked from the effort.
“Thanks.” I hid a smile. It galled him to give me the compliment, and I knew it.
A few words from Nain’s side of the conversation made it clear that something was up. He hung up and looked at me.
“Imps and lower demon disturbance in Hart Plaza,” he said, standing up.
“Do you want me to come?”
His gaze flicked over me, and he glanced away again. “Do you want to?”
“Can I fight?” I asked, watching him.
“Like I could stop you if you wanted to,” he said, irritated and amused at the same time.
“Then I’m in.” We got in Nain’s truck and drove the few blocks between the loft and Hart Plaza, on the riverfront. Storefronts and office buildings flanked the streets, their signs flashing and glowing, reflecting off of the hood of the truck as we drove. Nain was focused, not really in a talkative mood.
“So. The imps. What do I do?” I finally asked.
He glanced at me. “Kill them.”
“Isn’t that a little cruel?”
He glared at me, then jerked his eyes back to the road. “They’re demonic servants, Molls. They’re down there setting fires and hurting people, causing all kinds of mayhem. The more we dispose of now, the better. Evil little bastards.”
“Like demons are evil,” I muttered.
He let out an irritated huff. “This is not the time to have an existential crisis.”
“Fine,” I muttered waving my hand. I stared out the windshield.
He glanced at me again. “Any way you want to is fine. They’re really not hard to kill. It’s much harder to catch the lit
tle bastards in the first place.”
I thought a minute. “So, are they just wild, unorganized pests? Or is there someone in charge?”
Irritation, discomfort rolled off of Nain. “They work for demons. High-level demons.”
“Like you?”
He shook his head. “Worse than me.” He was quiet a minute. “There are demons like me, that have some speck of humanity in them. Not much. Not enough to make a difference, really. But to demons, that little speck means everything. Nothing would follow a demon of my birthline.”
“Except a bunch of magic-wielding freaks,” I said, looking out the window.
“Yeah. Except for those. Imps and lower demons serve the strongest demons. They flock to those that have the most power. It’s instinct, just the way they do things. And since most demons here are the typical, mindless destructive types…” he trailed off, shrugged. I got the picture.
“Are there many?”
He shook his head. “Most demons prefer the Nether. They can live there easily, without having to try to blend into a human society. But there’s a whole lot of pain they can cause here in the mortal world, and that’s like having crack sitting on a table next to an addict. Some can’t turn away.”
“So, this demon who gives the orders. Do you know who it is? Or where?”
Again, discomfort from Nain. “I know who it is. He moves around a lot.”
I looked over at him. “Is there a reason we’re not hunting his ass down? Wouldn’t that take care of the imps?”
He rolled his eyes. “You don’t just hunt down a high-level demon.”
“So we just let him keep hurting people?”
Anger. “We bide our time, and we do things the smart way. We do what we can.” He stopped the truck, jammed it into park, and turned to look at me. “Does that answer your question?”
I just looked at him and nodded. Anger still rolled off of him, felt like the tide coming in. I shoved my door open and got out.
As soon as I was out of the car, I could hear the sounds of chaos from the plaza. People yelling, screaming. A fight had broken out and was quickly getting out of hand.
“This is what they do,” Nain said as we jogged toward the plaza. “They whisper in the ears of the weak, the ones most filled with rage. They give them an excuse to act out, they push them toward it. And it causes this, which causes pain, which makes their master all the stronger.” His rage spiked, and his power rolled over me. I asked myself for the millionth time what the hell I was doing, and entered the fray.
Movement to my right caught my eye, and I looked. Imps, invisible to the eyes of the Normals, flooded the plaza. They were short, maybe three feet tall or so. Gray humanoid bodies, spindly arms and legs. Vaguely rodent-like faces with sharp teeth and beady black eyes. They surrounded the group of fighting people. Others climbed the sculptures, danced on top of the fountain.
“Like I said,” Nain said, following my gaze, “do whatever it takes. Any that leave here will just show up somewhere else tomorrow, doing the same damn thing.”
I nodded, and Nain ran into a crowd of imps, punching, kicking, tearing at limbs. The imps screamed and started to scatter. It would have been kind of funny if they weren’t so grotesque. And if I wasn’t still convinced that they deserved better than to be exterminated like roaches.
Sighing, I headed for another group of them before they could take off. I forced their will, made them stand right where they were. Then I forced each to strangle its neighbor. It was a brutal way to kill them, and it took longer than I would have liked, but it worked.
I felt like a monster. This. This was evil. Killing was not something I did. Ever. These were living beings.
Get the fuck over it, Molly. Nain’s voice in my head.
I hate you.
No response. Once that group was dead (and disintegrated into nothing, handy, that) most of the imps were gone. I rushed several, punching and kicking the same way I saw Nain doing a few feet away.
“Molly,” Nain shouted, pointing to the top of the fountain, where a few of the imps still danced.
He watched me. Waiting. A test. The imps stopped dancing when they saw me approach. There were eleven of them. They hopped down from the top of the fountain, and, as one, they bent a knee, bowed their heads, placed fists over where I guess their hearts were.
Did imps even have hearts?
I just stared at them. Felt Nain walk up and stand next to me.
“Well,” he said. “I told you that you’re powerful.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“They’re swearing fealty to you. They’re yours.”
“I don’t want them!” I yelled, then glanced at the imps, afraid I’d hurt their feelings. Did they have those? What the hell was I doing?
“They don’t have feelings, Molly. They’re primal. They follow power. They will do exactly as you say. Nothing more and nothing less.”
“I don’t want to be their master,” I said, staring at him.
“Then kill them so we can move on,” he said.
I clenched my fists.
“Do it, or I will. Decide,” Nain said. I punched him in the stomach before I knew what I was doing, and was on him, trying to hit him again. He grabbed both of my wrists, held me at arm’s length.
I used my knee, caught him not quite where I was hoping to. He wrestled me down to the ground and straddled me.
“Molly, stop it,” he ordered. I felt my power building. I was pissed off, and I was scared, and everything I thought I was was wrong. Blasting him wouldn’t solve it, but it sure the hell would make me feel a little better.
He groaned. “Would you dial it back, just a little,” he growled. “You’re pissed. I get it. Stop it.”
My head was pounding. My body felt like it was about to split open from the pressure. Nain was angry, concerned, but not afraid.
“Why aren’t you afraid of me?” I asked, and I heard the growl in my own voice.
“Because you’re a good person. You may hate me, but you’d hate yourself more if you ended me. We both know it.”
“I can’t kill them,” I whispered, and hated the tears rolling out of the corners of my eyes. He still held me pinned to the ground while chaos erupted around us.
“Then lead them. Put them to work doing whatever it is you want them to do. More will come. Decide what you want to do, and do it. But you have to do something, Molls.”
I nodded, felt my power receding a little, leaving a pounding head and an aching body.
“Get off me,” I muttered, and he did, pulling me up with him as he did. The imps still knelt, and I left them that way. For now. Nain kept his hand on my arm as we surveyed the plaza. I pulled away, unable to deal with the way my demon, or my body, or whatever the hell it was, responded to his touch.
The fight between the Normals still raged on. Shouts, screams filled the night air, and I could see rocks and bottles being thrown.
“Time to do your thing,” Nain said, nodding toward the crowd. “I’ll watch your back.”
I nodded, headed into the heart of the crowd. Rocks and bottles whizzed past my head. I was jostled, and one woman tried to hit me, but a look had her turning to find an easier victim.
I stood up on a bench and shouted. The crowd ignored me, kept fighting. I watched them go on pummeling each other, not even knowing why they were doing it, but totally invested in the fight nonetheless. I was still pissed, raw from whatever was happening with the imps. I could feel my power rise again in response to my anger. I shouted again. A few people, closest to me, turned and looked at me. The rest kept fighting.
“Hey, assholes,” I roared, and the air seemed to vibrate, and everyone stopped moving and stared at me. I glanced at Nain. He was watching me intently.
“You are going to stop fighting.” My voice thundered into the plaza. I felt the ground shake beneath me. “You are going to clean up your fucking mess. And you are going to peacefully go home and knock this shit off,” I dema
nded. The night had gone silent around us, and the air crackled with my power. “It will be done.” I focused, and with the words, the power fulfilled its duty. The people started milling around, picking up the garbage they’d been throwing, and slowly, mechanically, making their way from the plaza to cars and bus stops.
Once I was satisfied that I had them all under control, I jumped down and headed over to Nain. He was watching me, an unreadable expression on his face.
“What?” I asked, glaring up at him.
“You are one scary bitch,” he said, and I felt just a twinge, a hint of pride coming from him.
“You say the sweetest things,” I said, rolling my eyes. Then I glanced over at the imps. “To me, my imp-men,” I said.
Nain laughed. “That was terrible.”
I shrugged, and headed toward the truck. The imps followed. I seethed during the ride back to the loft. The imps rode in the bed of the truck, and stared at me through the back window the entire time.
“Are they going to spend all of their time staring at me?” I asked as Nain pulled the truck into his parking spot. He just shrugged.
We headed into the loft, and the gaggle of imps followed. “Imps, roof. Stay there,” I said, feeling like an ass for ordering around beings that only came up to my thighs. They nodded, thumped their fists to their chests, and climbed the stairs that led to the roof.
When we got into the loft, Nain disappeared into his room. Brennan came out of his room. Ada and Stone waved me over to the dining room table where they were going over maps of the city, planning the team’s next move.
“What’s up with the big man?” Ada asked me.
“He’s an asshole,” I said, sitting down.
“Isn’t he always?” Brennan asked, joining us.
Stone laughed. The three of them kept talking. George and Veronica sat in the living room watching TV., and I stared at Nain’s bedroom door, willing him to come out. After a few minutes, he did.
Brennan glanced between us. “Uh, Molly. I’m going up to the roof for a while. Wanna come?” he asked.
Lost Girl: Hidden Book One Page 6