“I see you are not taking the pain relievers the doctor prescribed.”
“No. Are you going to give me grief too?”
“No,” Alex shook his head. “But you will be very disagreeable for a while. Maybe someone will want to hit you.”
Thom laughed at that, in spite of his pain. “I’m sure you’re right.”
“But I can understand that you do not want to take them. They can help, but also they can be bad sometimes. I will not, as you say, give you grief.”
“Thanks.”
“Now, do you have any questions?”
“Um, no?”
“You do not sound sure.”
“I’m tired and I hurt. If I think of anything, I’ll ask next time.”
Alex closed the file and stood. “Okay, then I will see you the day after tomorrow. Tomorrow you will probably be sore, but get out of bed and do those exercises we practiced. The more you do, the more you can do, is that not what they say?”
Thom nodded, already half asleep.
* * *
Ben caught up with the therapist on the front porch.
“Alex, right?”
“Yes, that is right.”
“I just wanted to ask. Well, I had some questions.” Ben ran his hand through his hair and shifted his weight, feeling awkward.
“Yes? What is it you want to know?”
“Well, a couple of things. What should I… what should we be doing for him, to help him? How much should he walk, or not walk?”
“He can move around the room if he wants. He will probably feel restless. The main concern is that he not get too tired and fall.”
“And, um, what about, uh—”
“You are Mr. Caldwell’s partner, yes?”
“Um, yeah.”
“You want to ask about the sex?”
“Um,” Ben could feel himself blushing. “Yeah.”
“It is natural and important. The orgasm can be relaxing and releases endorphins. It is a natural pain reliever. Also, it is something you can give him that no one else can, you see?”
“Right, okay, so with his injuries, what’s okay? And when?”
“Of course, you do not want to do anything too strenuous. A handjob or a blowjob would be fine. Let his pain be your guide. Also, be careful of the stitches at his surgery site. If you are careful and take it slowly you can do these things now. This is what you wanted to know, yes?”
“Well, yes, but I didn’t want to seem, uh, like a pervert or anything.”
“No, you do not. It is something a partner would worry about. And Mr. Caldwell is in a great deal of pain. The comforts, both physical and emotional, would do him good.”
“Thank you. I’ll, um, keep it in mind.”
He watched as Alex loaded his gear into his Subaru wagon and drove down the hill. He hadn’t told Thom the big plan yet. Everyone had agreed that he should be the one to do it, and he was prepared to. Right now, though, Thom was probably in a foul mood after a strenuous therapy session. He wanted to think a handjob or a blowjob would mellow Thom out enough to put him in the mood for a conversation, but right now he doubted that Thom would let him get close enough to touch him.
Ben went back inside to fix Thom’s lunch and prepare himself for a confrontation.
* * *
Thom could tell by the expression on Ben’s face that he was surprised to see Thom sitting at the dining table that had been pushed up against one wall.
“Is it okay for you to be up like this?” Ben asked, setting the lunch tray down on the table.
“Alex said I should try,” Thom made himself answer. The silent treatment wasn’t working and being angry was getting exhausting.
“And you’ll do anything Alex tells you to?” Ben asked him, smiling a little, but not enough to show his dimple.
“Not anything. But this seemed to make sense. Why?”
“No reason,” Ben shrugged, still smiling. He started taking plates off the tray and setting places for both of them to eat.
“You’re eating lunch with me?”
“Why wouldn’t I? We eat lunch together all the time.”
“That was – that was before. This is different.” Thom looked down at his plate and thought about how clumsy he was going to look trying to feed himself with his left hand.
“It’s the same. I like having lunch with you.”
Thom picked up half of a grilled cheese sandwich and thought maybe he could get that to his mouth without too much trouble.
“Where is everybody?” Thom asked after he’d eaten a couple of bites.
“Steve is out in the vineyard with Chuck, Dad’s in town doing some shopping, and Mindy’s at school. It’s just you and me until the occupational therapist gets here.” Ben leaned towards him and put a little extra drawl into his voice. “Why? What’d you have in mind?”
“Nothing! Just wondering. And I’m – I probably shouldn’t be doing anything – you know – like that.”
Ben sat back and took a bite of his sandwich. “You know, orgasms release endorphins. They’re like, a natural pain reliever. And if you get addicted, I’ll be happy to give you a fix anytime you like.”
Thom rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything.
“Okay, fine. Just keep it in mind. You could relax and let me take care of everything.” Ben reached over and traced the outline of Thom’s jaw. “I’d be happy to, especially if it helped you feel better.”
“That’s just it, don’t you see? I don’t want a – a pity fuck or whatever. I don’t want you taking care of me. It makes me feel – I feel –”
“What? What does it make you feel?”
“Useless. Old and useless. Happy now?”
“Of course not. But what if it had been me? What if I had been the one who went to the shed and got hurt? Because what happened to you could just as easily have happened to me. I’d like to think you’d want to take care of me.”
Thom turned his attention back to his plate. He couldn’t meet Ben’s eyes because he knew that everything the younger man was saying was true. And if Ben had been the one injured he would be doing everything he could to take care of him and get him well. He didn’t even realize he was crying until he felt the first tear roll past his nose and catch at the corner of his mouth. Then Ben was kneeling at his side and dabbing at his face with a napkin.
“Don’t. Please, I didn’t mean to upset you. I’m sorry.”
“No,” Thom took a shuddering breath, “I’m the one who should be sorry. I’ve been a total asshole. I should be grateful. I know all you want to do is help.”
“Well, to be honest I also miss that fat dick of yours.”
Thom had to laugh at that – Ben had a talent for making him blush and laugh at the same time.
“Made you laugh,” Ben leaned forward and kissed his cheek. “Now finish your lunch.”
* * *
The occupational therapist/home health nurse arrived shortly after lunch. His name was Tyler, and he looked like a younger Idris Elba. Thom tried not to think about that because Idris Elba was seriously hot. When a guy is showing you the best way to lever yourself on and off a toilet with one hand and helping you bathe, it’s best not to be thinking about how hot he is.
Thom had been embarrassed at first when the nurse had arrived to change his dressings and help him get cleaned up, but Tyler was so matter-of-fact about everything that Thom was soon put at ease.
“I do this every day,” Tyler had told him. “And you don’t have anything I haven’t seen before. Just with fewer wrinkles.”
“You’ll be doing this on your own in no time,” Tyler told him as Thom used the handrail to pull himself up with his left arm. “People adapt to using their non-dominant side all the time, and most of them aren’t in as good a shape as you to start with.”
“What I really want is a shower. Desperately.”
Tyler laughed. “That’s what everyone says. If it was just your collarbone, we could figure something out. But we need t
o keep your surgery site dry on top of that. It’s a little complicated, and the multiple injuries on your dominant side make it more challenging, but we’ll get you through it.”
Tyler showed him how he could put on shorts and socks and sweatpants using a claw-like device on a stick. Then he helped Thom figure out how to brush his teeth and shave. They used an electric razor that Thom hated, but anything else would have left his face covered with cuts. “Maybe I should just grow a beard until I can give myself a decent shave.”
“Nah. You’ll feel better if you shave.” Thom couldn’t argue with that. He had enough vanity – and enough humility – to admit that it was true.
By the time they were finished, Thom was exhausted, but felt fresh for the first time in days. He also felt more confident and optimistic about his recovery.
“Something sure smells good,” Tyler said as he walked Thom back to bed. Thom stopped and sniffed the air.
“Smells like Jon’s roasting vegetables.”
“Okay, now which one is Jon? Because you’ve got a full house here, man.”
“Jon is Ben’s dad, and the only one here who can really cook.”
“You’re lucky. You’ve got family here to help you and support you. You’ll need to be careful not to let them do too much, though.”
“I’m worried about that, actually. I know they want to help, but I need to be able to do things myself. I don’t know how to ask them not to do something without sounding like a jerk.”
“It’s a fine line to walk, because you also don’t want to do too much and jeopardize your recovery. It’s hard for someone like you, who’s used to being active and independent, to realize and acknowledge his limitations. If you’re tired or in pain, let them help.”
Thom nodded and leaned back against the pillows.
“How are you sleeping? Is the bed at the right angle for you?”
“I sleep okay – the doctor suggested ibuprofen with a sleep aid and that seems to help. I wake up during the night, but I can usually get back to sleep.”
“And the bed is okay? Do we need to make any adjustments?”
“It’s fine. I leave it slanted up like this pretty much all the time. It hurts my back and my shoulder if it’s flat. Also, I’m used to sleeping on my side, and if the bed is flat I start to roll over in my sleep and it hurts like hell.”
Tyler nodded. “All perfectly normal. As long as you’re comfortable and sleeping pretty well, that’s what matters. If you start having trouble let someone know.”
“I will. Thanks.”
“Okay, I’m off then. I’ll be back day after tomorrow.”
* * *
Ben put the finishing touches on his application and saved it. He’d submit it tonight, after he’d had a chance to speak to Thom. He stood and stretched, and caught a whiff of something cooking in the kitchen. Dad must have gotten home.
His dad wasn’t alone in the kitchen. Leaning against the counter was a man who must be the OT who had come to work with Thom. He was tall, probably six-foot-two, with close-cropped hair and skin the color of bittersweet chocolate. His biceps bulged under the short sleeves of his scrub top and he was – no, Ben wasn’t imagining it – he was totally trying to cruise his dad!
Ben didn’t know whether to be amused or horrified, because while he had to admit his dad looked good for his age, he was still his dad so – ew. Jon seemed to be oblivious to the other man’s flirtation, and looked up when Ben cleared his throat.
“Oh, hi son. Have you met Tyler? He’s the, what is it, Tyler? OT?”
Tyler reached out to shake Ben’s hand, “Tyler Gaines. Technically I’m a nurse practitioner, but we run a lean shop at C.B. Rehab, so I’m a little bit of everything, including OT.”
“Ben Loomis. Good to meet you, Tyler. Everything go okay with Thom? Anything we need to know?”
“Yeah, actually. I’m glad I’ve got both of you here. He’s having trouble adapting to being limited, which is understandable. He’s used to being independent and taking care of himself, so everyone needs to let him do as much as he can himself. He’s not helpless, just a little sore and weak at the moment. He’ll get tired easily, and physical therapy is going to leave him sore for a while, but he can do more than you’d think.”
“How will we know if he’s trying to do too much?” Jon asked.
“I’ve told him he needs to be honest with everyone about how he’s feeling, but in case he’s not, it’ll probably be obvious.”
“Like when he gets cranky and withdraws?” Ben asked.
“Yes, that’s usually a sign.”
“Thanks. We’ll keep an eye on him and try not to overdo the helping.”
Tyler nodded, “Okay, then, I should be going. I’ll be back same time day after tomorrow.”
“Dad, why don’t you see Tyler out while I check on the food?” Ben nudged his dad towards the door. Jon gave him a puzzled look, but turned to Tyler.
“Yes, of course. Tyler?”
Ben opened the oven door and looked inside, but had no idea what he was supposed to be doing, so he closed it again and hoped his dad would be back before something burned.
“What was that all about?” Jon asked as he came back into the kitchen.
“Seriously?”
“Uh, yeah. Since when do you cook?”
Ben rolled his eyes. “It had nothing to do with cooking. Could you not see that Tyler was totally into you?”
“What? No, that can’t be right.” Jon turned and looked toward the front door, then back at Ben. “Really?”
“Didn’t he try to flirt with you when you walked him out?”
“Maybe, I guess? I thought he was just being friendly.” Jon picked up a potholder and opened the oven, removing the tray of cauliflower and Brussels sprouts.
“He’ll be back in a couple of days. You watch – if you’re here he’ll find you.”
Jon shook his head. “I think you’re imagining it. I’m old enough to be his father.”
“Maybe he likes older men? Maybe he thinks you’re a silver fox!” Ben giggled and slapped his hand over his mouth.
“Enough about me and my imaginary love life. Why don’t you go talk to Thom?”
“Yeah, it’s time for The Talk, I guess.”
* * *
Thom looked up from his e-reader when he heard the pocket doors that separated the dining room from the hallway close. Ben was walking towards him with a serious expression on his usually smiling face.
“What’s going on?”
Ben took the device from his hand and laid it on the bedside table. “Have you given any thought to what we discussed at lunch?”
Thom licked his lips, watching as Ben’s gaze dropped to his mouth and the younger man’s eyes darkened. “I – yeah. I have, actually.”
“The eye candy didn’t hurt, did it?”
“What do you mean, eye candy?”
“Oh, come on. I saw Tyler, and the resemblance to a certain British actor did not escape me.”
“Oh, that.” Thom blushed.
“Imagine my shock when I went into the kitchen to find him trying to flirt with my dad!”
“No! What did Jon do?”
“He was completely oblivious! So lame.”
“Poor Tyler,” Thom chuckled and shook his head.
“He can try again in a couple of days. But enough about them. I came in here for more important business.” Ben bent over the bed, resting his weight on his arms.
“Business?”
“Personal business,” Ben murmured, closing the gap between them to kiss Thom’s lips.
Thom thought he might go up in flames. How had he ever even imagined he could give this up? He surrendered, losing himself in the kiss and parting his lips at the slightest pressure from Ben’s tongue. He felt Ben’s hand slip beneath the covers, stroking his belly below where his right arm was strapped to his chest. They probably shouldn’t be doing this now – someone could come in at any moment – but it felt too good to stop
.
Ben’s hand moved lower, finding the drawstring of his sweatpants and untying it. Thom’s breath caught in anticipation and Ben pulled back just far enough to whisper against his lips. “Please, Thom. I need to feel close to you.”
Thom didn’t open his eyes, just nodded and strained forward to recapture those lips he was already missing.
Ben pulled away again, lowering the covers and carefully pulling Thom’s sweats and boxers down far enough to expose his groin. Pulling the covers back up, Ben bent back down to kiss him. Thom brought his good hand up to tangle in Ben’s shaggy hair and hold him in place. He didn’t want to stop kissing, even if it meant his dick didn’t get any attention.
But it would seem he had underestimated his lover’s ability to multitask. After just a couple of minutes he felt a lube-slicked hand stroking and coaxing him until he was hard. There was a tricky moment when he started to thrust and the resulting pain caused a softening of his erection. But Ben didn’t give up. He broke their kiss to whisper, “Shh. Don’t move, sweetheart. Just let me do all the work.”
Thom bit his lip and nodded. Ben gave his earlobe a nibble, then moved down to pull the covers back and lay one arm across Thom’s thighs to hold him still. He resumed stroking, pinching and squeezing the way Thom liked. “Ben,” he choked. “Soon—”
Ben lowered his head, kissing along the top of Thom’s thigh, nuzzling his balls. “Now.” His breath tickled and his voice vibrated against Thom’s balls. “Come now.”
Thom gritted his teeth, trying to stay quiet while he came. There was pain, but he wasn’t sure whether it was from his hip or his shoulder or the relentless pressure of Ben’s hand on his glans – it melded with the pleasure and he couldn’t separate them. His seed seemed to pour out of him, thick and white and hot as it covered Ben’s hand and dripped onto his stomach.
“Oh, God,” Thom gasped, flopping back against his pillow. “Ungh-”
“Don’t move – I’ll be right back.”
Thom nodded. He thought he nodded, anyway. Ben was back in moments with a warm washcloth. Thom lay back, enjoying the sensations as Ben cleaned him up. “You were right.”
Saving Grapes (Cable's Bend Book 1) Page 15