by T. M. Smith
“The offer is there for you too Micah. I’m not sure what benefits you have or are using from the VA, but I am here for you to talk to as well, if you need me.” Tristan held Micah’s elbow as well as his gaze. Jesus, but the man was beautiful. Were it not for the way Micah tended to Gabe, the attraction that was obvious to probably everyone but Gabe, Tristan would be on Micah in a New York minute.
“I’ll think about it,” was the only response he got before Micah pulled away and moved around the chairs, heading back toward the house.
“And Micah,” Tristan called after him. Micah looked back over his shoulder. “Tread lightly where Gabe is concerned. He just lost his partner. He is hurting and could hurt you in the process by accident.” Micah turned back and stood there for a few seconds before nodding and walking on up to the house.
***
Conversation over dinner flowed as smoothly as the wine. Tristan and Jon slid easily into the conversations that circled the table, as if they had been a part of the odd little family all along. Tristan paid close attention to Gabe and Micah, how they were with each other, what they talked about with the other people at the table. He thought he was doing a good job of not ogling or staring, but then he saw the sly grin on Kory’s face when he looked his way. Busted.
They were just finishing dinner when Jordan and Cassie showed up, apologizing for being late, and claiming traffic was a nightmare.
“Yeah right, we just drove out here a few hours ago and there was no traffic at all. You two were knocking boots.” Kory teased.
Cassie blushed while Jordan shot Kory a glare that spoke volumes. “Hey, as long as you no knocking things on my desk, we good,” Victor said with a chuckle, and if at all possible, Cassie turned an even deeper shade of red.
Everyone busted out laughing, that is, everyone but Tristan. He sat staring at Cassie. That face, those eyes, that blush. It was all vaguely familiar, but why? Tristan sat quietly, studying Cassie’s features, trying to shake loose the familiarity he couldn’t quite place. Mattie, Gabe and Micah dumped their plates in the sink then headed into the den to watch TV. Victor and Andrew cleaned up and started washing dishes, while Cassie and Jordan leaned against the cabinet talking to Kory and Jon.
Kory said something, Tristan didn’t catch what, and Cassie turned to face him, smiling and nodding. Kory smiled back and Tristan almost fell out of his chair. “I’ll be damned,” Tristan mumbled.
“I’m sorry, you are?” Jordan said to Tristan.
“Oh, my bad! Jordan, Cassie, this is Jon’s brother Tristan. We brought him out to talk with Gabe.” Kory made the introductions.
Jon, Kory and Cassie had all turned to face him. Tristan reached up and placed his hand on Kory’s cheek, pushing his head back to where he faced Cassie. “Jon, please tell me you see this.”
Jon glared at his brother, but appeased him. “See what Tris? I don’t…” Jon squinted his eyes, cocking his head sideways, finally seeing what Tristan did, the almost identical profiles Kory and Cassie shared.
“What’s… going on?” Jordan asked, confusion wrapped around the words.
“Kory, Babe, you and Cassie, your profiles from the side are identical.” Jon said.
“Same hair color, same amber eyes, and when they blush. That’s what caught my attention; they both blushed then turned to look at each other.” Tristan and Jon continued to stare at Kory and Cassie, to the point Cassie was starting to squirm nervously.
“What the hell are you two going on about?” Jordan asked.
“Jon? What are you talking about? I don’t understand.” Kory’s voice held both confusion and a slight tremble of fear.
But it was Tristan who spoke, and not to Kory, but to Cassie. “Cassie, are you adopted?”
“Now wait just a damn…” Cassie reached for Jordan, curling her arm in his, cutting off his rant.
“It’s okay J. Yes, I was. Why do you ask?” She replied.
“How old are you?” Jon asked.
“Okay. What the fuck is with the third degree?!” Jordan was fuming.
Cassie reached up and cupped his cheek, smiling up at him. “Hey, it’s okay.” Jordan eyed her for a few intense moments before his face relaxed a little and he nodded, not speaking.
“I’m twenty three. But, why are you asking these questions?” she asked.
“Do you know how old you were when you were adopted? Where your birth parents lived, anything?” Tristan asked.
Jordan grew tense again, glaring at Tristan, but kept his mouth closed. The tension in the room had drawn the attention of Victor and Andrew by now. “Everyone, come, sit.” Victor motioned to the table, grabbing a handful of clean glasses while Andrew popped the cork on a couple more bottles of wine.
Andrew made his way around the table, filling glasses, Jordan’s twice since he downed the first glass like a shot of tequila. Tristan covered his glass and shook his head, “No, but thank you.” Andrew nodded, sitting a bottle of water down in front of him instead.
They all sat in uncomfortable silence for a few minutes, unsure of what to say or do. It was Kory that broke the chill in the air. “Tris, what makes you think Cassie is my sister?” He could tell from the line of questioning where Tristan’s mind was, what he was thinking.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Time out. Your sister? You have a sister?” Jordan was firing off questions like an AK-47. “And why in the hell would you think Cassie is his sister?” Jordan asked Tristan before turning to Cassie. “I thought you said your mom was killed and that was why you were adopted?”
Kory gasped, eyes wide, staring at Cassie like he was only just seeing her for the first time. “What? Wait. Your mom was killed Cassie?” Kory asked, and then it was something akin to chaos. Kory, Cassie, Jordan, Jon and Tristan were all trying to talk over each other, the questions and words getting lost in a cloud of confusion.
“Enough!” Victor slammed his hand down on the table, making everyone jump, but they all shut the fuck up. “Now, we are being calm. One question at a time. Tristan, you first.”
Tristan inhaled a deep breath. “Okay, first let me just say, I’m sorry if I am upsetting you Jordan, or you Cassie. This is the first time I am actually meeting you and, well, I can’t believe that no one else has ever picked up on the resemblance. Unless you and Kory have never been in the same room together.”
“Yes and no Tris. I mean, I’ve been in the same room with both of them more than once, and I didn’t even catch it until you pointed it out.” Jon responded.
“Seriously. I am this close to losing my shit if one of you does not tell me what in the blue hell you are talking about.” Jordan held up two fingers, mere centimeters apart, indicating the thin line they were all treading on.
“Shut the fuck up Jordan.” Kory said, waving Jordan off when he glared at him. “Cassie, tell me what you know about your birth parents. Anything you don’t mind sharing with us about your adoption.”
Cassie scooted closer to Jordan as he wrapped an arm around her, holding her protectively. She attempted a smile, but her eyes were wary. “My adoptive parents have always been honest with me, as soon as I was old enough to understand, they told me I was adopted. When I turned sixteen I wanted to know more about where I came from, so my mom contacted the agency and they sent us a file. It didn’t tell me much, just that I was born in Memphis, I was two when I was adopted, my mother was killed and that was why I went into the system. There was no other surviving family.” Cassie watched Kory as she spoke, for what, who knew.
“There are too many similarities Kory, what more proof do you need?” Tristan asked him.
Everyone turned to Kory who sat staring at Cassie, his eyes full of unshed tears. “I was born in Memphis, and my mother, our mother was killed when I was eight and you were two. They took us to the hospital with her, led us into the room so we could say goodbye.” Kory went mute for a few intense moments. Everyone at the table watched him, waiting. Kory swallowed around the lump in his throat a couple times, trying to find
the courage to talk about his mother with everyone in the room.
Jon reached for Kory’s hand, twining their fingers together. Kory gave him a sideways glance and Jon just smiled at him, nodding his head, giving Kory the courage to continue. “They had washed the blood away and combed her hair. But her skin was so pale and white, cold. Then some lady came in and ushered us into a car, took us to a house full of other children without families. I finally passed out from exhaustion, holding you…” Kory broke off on a sob. Jon pulled him close, wrapping an arm around Kory. No one spoke, no one asked any questions. They all sat quietly and gave Kory a few moments to find the words he needed to say.
When he looked up again the tears were falling freely down his cheeks. “When I woke up, you were gone. They took you from me while I slept and I never saw you again. I tried, fuck! I tried more than once to find you. I begged them to open the files, to tell me something, anything. You were all I had left and they stole you from me!” Kory broke down then. Turning and burying himself in the welcome cocoon of Jon’s arms. He didn’t know how long he sat there, bawling like a baby. But when he finally lifted his head and looked around the dining room, everyone was gone except for Cassie and Jordan.
Kory wasn’t sure how Cassie, no, Kas, would react. This had to be just as much of a shock to her, if not more so. He damn near broke down again when she smiled and reached for his hand. “Oh god Kory, how much time we have lost.”
“So you believe it, that we are brother and sister?” She just nodded, smiling.
“There are too many similarities. And, I can’t explain it, but I feel the truth of it. Will you tell me how she died? And why our father wasn’t there.”
“Oh lord, Kas, that is not a pretty story. Are you sure you want it all at once?” Kory asked. Again, Kassie just nodded.
So Kory sat there holding his sister’s hand and started at the beginning. Learning his mom was pregnant and feeling betrayed, certain he would hate the little troll. The day his mom brought the bouncing bundle of joy home from the hospital and sat her in Kory’s tiny hands before taking a handful of the pain pills the doctor gave her and passing out. Leaving a six year old Kory to change diapers and make bottles, to take care of a newborn. How he quickly learned that he had to hold her head steady, because if he didn’t, it flopped around and he feared it might fall right off. How over the next two years, every waking moment was all about her. His Kas with her tiny little round face and eyes the exact same color as his that lit up when Kory came into view.
Sadly though, the happy, quiet moments were few and far between. “Mom, well, I’m pretty sure she was a prostitute. She didn’t have a normal job where she went to work every day, but the bills were paid and groceries were there. The problem was, more often than not, she brought home the worst of the worst. I remember walking into your room once and the guy she had brought home was standing over your crib. He was staring down at you, and at the time, I was too young to know why, I just knew I didn’t like it and I screamed and yelled and kicked him until he left. When I got older, I remembered that look and it was predatory. It makes me physically ill to think of what that miserable piece of shit might have done had I not walked in on him.” Kory visibly shuddered at the memory.
“The day she died I came home from school and found you in your crib. You were hungry, screaming, your diaper was disgusting. I cleaned you up and calmed you down, and when I went looking for Mom, I found her on the bathroom floor.” Kory choked on a gasp. He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. He hated reliving that day; it always wrecked him. Then he felt a soft, gentle hand on his cheek. Kory opened his eyes and looked into hers, those eyes he hadn’t seen in so many years. His eyes, their mother’s eyes, and for the first time since he was eight years old, he felt whole.
He covered her hand with his. “Oh God Kas, I’m so sorry. How could I look at you almost every day for how many years now, and not know? Is this some fucking nightmare?” Kory sucked in a breath. “I’m sorry I couldn’t save her.” In seconds, Kassie was in his lap, arms wound tight around his shoulders, her head buried in crook of his neck. They sat there in each other’s arms, mourning a mother and a life that Kassie could not remember, a tragedy that Kory could never forget.
~ Chapter 15 | How to Deal ~
Kory paced back and forth on the patio, circling the tables and chairs, working himself up something fierce. Jon watched him from the den, allowing his lover a few minutes of self-deprecation before he went out and knocked some sense into him. Jon knew full well what was wrong, stirring up the past always put Kory in a foul mood. The evening’s events had played out exactly as they should have with the added bonus of Kory finally finding his sister. Exploding bombs always left a pile of rubble in their wake. And now, it was Jon’s job to clean up the disaster, pick up the pieces and put Kory back together.
He turned and walked into the kitchen, pulling the fridge open and grabbing a couple of beers. Then he headed out back to untie the knots Kory had worked himself into. Kory’s head jerked up when he heard the door open. When he saw it was just Jon, he continued his erratic march of madness, weaving in and out of tables and chairs.
“I brought you a beer,” Jon held it up and Kory snatched it on his next pass, turning and weaving around another table, tipping the bottle to his lips and downing half of it in one gulp.
“What’s going on Kory? Talk to me Babe.”
“Nothing… fine.” Were the only words Jon could make out of the mumbled mess that spilled from Kory’s lips.
“Bullshit.” Jon stated flatly. Kory didn’t respond, just continued to pace back and forth, circling the patio furniture. Jon thought that Kory could easily be confused for an antsy drug dealer, or a Mountain Lion trying to find a way to escape his cage. Jon sat his beer down on the table beside him and then, on the next pass, he grabbed Kory and pulled him close, their faces mere inches apart.
“Kory, Babe, please, talk to me,” He begged.
“I can’t do this Jon.” Kory stared up into Jon’s eyes, his own full of fear and trepidation.
What the fuck?! “You can’t do what Kory?” Jon tried to keep his voice level, though his heart rate had just sped up a notch.
Kory jerked free and took a couple steps back, twisting his hands together nervously. “This, any of it, you,” he swung an arm toward Jon, “me,” he slapped himself on the chest, “Kas,” he swung an arm toward the house, “my life is a series of pain, disappointment and fuck ups! This can’t possibly end well. I’m just setting myself up to get hurt again!” Kory was yelling now and Jon could feel several sets of eyes on them, just knowing Kory’s angry shouts had drawn the attention of at least a few people inside of the house.
Jon stared Kory down before grabbing him by the arms and jerking his body flush to his own. He could feel Kory’s heart racing and for a split second, he considering taking it easy on him. Jon knew deep down though, that Kory didn’t respond well to easy. “Now you listen to me Kory White, I love you and I will be damned if I will let you walk away from me, from what we have. I know you are scared, I know baby, but you have to have faith in us, faith in me. Have I lied to you or hurt you since we met?”
Kory was trembling and all Jon wanted to do was wrap his man up in his arms and hold him. Kiss him, touch him and whisper in his ear that everything was going to be okay. He fought the urge. Right now what Kory needed was a healthy dose of reality. Eventually, Kory stopped fidgeting and shook his head.
“Kory, I know it’s hard to put your trust in someone when the past has taught you not to. But I am not going anywhere. All that matters is that we love each other and we want to build a life together. Will it be all sunshine and roses? Hell no. Some days I’m going to want to strangle the life out of you, and some days you are probably going to want to suffocate me while I sleep. But I promise you, I am in this for the long haul and it is going to take a whole hell of a lot more than a random hissy fit on Victor’s patio for you to push me away,” Jon could feel the tensio
n slowly ebbing from Kory’s body, so he pulled him closer, his lips barely brushing Kory’s cheek as he leaned into him to whisper in Kory’s ear.
“Your sister loves you. I love you and I will tie you to our bed and fuck you blind before I will let you walk out on me, on us.” Jon leaned back and looked into Kory’s eyes, making sure he had Kory’s full attention. “Do you understand what I’m saying Kory?”
Kory gave him a jerky nod before grabbing two fists full of Jon’s shirt, burying his head in Jon’s chest, still trembling. “Oh god Jon, I’m sorry, I’m such a fucking mess. I don’t know what is wrong with me. I just, I get lost in my head and memories and I start to think, it is going to end anyway, so why not do it now. I pick fights with you on purpose. Who does that?!” Kory sobbed, his tears, soaking Jon’s shirt.
Not for the first time, the thought occurred to Jon that Kory might benefit from a few counseling sessions of his own. Kory’s mood swings were epic; most likely due to the crap hand life had dealt him early on. Picking and choosing shit men didn’t stack the deck in Kory’s favor either. Talking to someone, letting all the pain and anger out just might help Kory to get past the past.