by Julie Kagawa
And how are we going to do that? I thought. You’ve already been all over the goblin markets, looking for a cure. The only other thing we’ve found is a drug made from the nightmares of children. Annwyl certainly won’t agree to that. What other permanent solution is there?
Guro nodded and held out the disk. Keirran hesitated as if reluctant to touch it, then reached out and deliberately grasped it by the metal face. I saw his jaw tighten, but then he bowed to Guro, turned and walked toward the Summer faery on the blanket.
Kenzie rose and moved aside, watching somberly as the prince knelt beside Annwyl and gently slipped the amulet around her neck, laying the disk over her chest. The blood from his wound spread over the back of his shirt, but he didn’t seem to notice, his gaze only for the Summer girl in front of him. Quietly, I walked up to join Kenzie, hoping this would work, that the dark, bloody ritual we’d just participated in wasn’t for nothing. I could see the outline of the blanket through the faery’s body, the flickering amulet on her chest far more real than the fey it was attached to.
Annwyl’s eyes fluttered, then opened—a bright, piercing green—and Keirran smiled.
“Keirran?”
“I’m here,” the prince whispered, his voice slightly choked with emotion, with relief. Taking her hand, he held it in both of his, as Annwyl flickered, becoming solid again. “Welcome back.”
My stomach uncoiled. Kenzie grinned at me, and I smiled, too. For now, at least, things were all right.
But then my arm gave a sharp flare of pain, making me wince. Turning away, I gingerly prodded my wound, judging the severity. It was hard to see with all the blood, but it appeared to be a fairly deep gash right above my elbow.
Kenzie saw what I was doing and gave a sharp gasp. “Oh, Ethan,” she whispered, sounding appalled. “I thought Keirran had hit you, but I didn’t know it was that bad.” Her eyes flashed, and she glared at the prince, as if ready to stalk up and demand what he was thinking. I put a hand out to stop her.
“It’s fine,” I said. “It’s not that bad, and besides...” I hesitated, wondering what she would think of me now. “The one I gave him is worse.”
“What?” She looked at me strangely, then back at Keirran, her eyes widening as she finally saw the blood against his dark shirt. “Ethan, what the hell? What happened out there?”
“Ethan.” Guro’s voice stopped me from answering, which was good because I had no clue how to reply. I walked up, and without a word, he handed me a first-aid kit. Not the tiny, plastic kind, either. This was pretty heavy-duty. Kenzie padded up behind me, took the kit from my hands and knelt to open it. After a moment of rifling through the contents, she pointed to the ground beside her. I sat obediently.
“What will you do now?” Guro asked, watching us as Kenzie tended to my wounded arm. I let her hold out my elbow and push back the sleeve, wiping the blood away. After everything we’d gone through, she had done this so often it was almost routine.
“I don’t know,” I admitted, clenching my jaw as Kenzie dabbed at the cut itself with what felt like a peroxide square. That or a strip of acid. “I guess we’ll be searching for that ‘permanent solution’ Keirran was talking about.” I sucked in a breath as peroxide seeped into the gash, making my whole arm burn. Kenzie murmured an apology. “Though I really have no idea where we can find one,” I breathed. “There’s no way to really stop it unless she goes back home.”
Guro didn’t reply, but Kenzie piped up, as if it was obvious. “So send her home.”
“She can’t go home,” I told her. “Titania banished her from the Nevernever, for being ‘too pretty.’ That’s why she’s in exile.”
“But exile isn’t permanent, right?” Kenzie said, picking up a roll of gauze and unwinding it deftly. “If Titania lifted her banishment, couldn’t she go back?”
“Yeah, but...” I trailed off as I thought about it. There was no real reason Annwyl couldn’t return to the Nevernever, none, except for Titania. The Queen of the Summer Court was as vain and fickle as she was powerful and dangerous, but Annwyl hadn’t exactly done anything wrong. Her banishment was likely done on a whim, and if it had been a whim, then maybe if we reasoned with the Summer Queen...
I groaned. “I’m not going to like what we’re going to do next, am I?”
“Nope,” Kenzie said cheerfully, winding gauze around my arm. “You’re going to hate it. And we’ll probably have to hear you whine about how much you hate it the entire trip.”
I frowned at her. “I don’t whine !”
She raised an eyebrow at me, and I snorted. Guro sighed.
“I don’t like this, Ethan,” he said, making me cringe. “But I understand that this is something you must do, whatever it is. Just one warning.” His eyes narrowed, and he glanced behind us at Keirran. “Be careful around that one,” he said in a lower voice. “You saw what happened tonight. It was not only your darkness rising to the surface. And anger is not the only emotion that can force us to consider terrible things. There is only so much a soul can take before it is broken.”
The image of my body lying on the ground, Keirran standing over it with a bloody sword, flickered to mind, and I shoved it back. “I’ll be careful, Guro,” I promised. “Thank you for everything.”
I helped him load the stuff back in his car, carrying things one-handed as my arm still hurt like hell. I hoped I hadn’t hurt Keirran too badly with that stab to the ribs. True, he’d drawn first blood, but I shouldn’t have let it get that far. I’d known what I’d been doing every second of that fight, and it wasn’t a case of me just trying to defend myself; I’d really wanted to hurt him.
“Call me if you need anything,” Guro said, opening the front door of his SUV. “Anytime, day or night. And Ethan...?”
“Yes, Guro?”
His dark gaze met mine. “You can’t save everyone,” he said in a gentle voice. “Sometimes, you have to make the decision to let them go.”
I watched as he drove away, waited until the vehicle turned a corner and vanished from sight, then hurried back to the group.
His words haunted me with every step.
* * *
Kenzie met me at the edge of the glade, alone.
“Where are the other two?” I asked, looking past her to the clearing, quite empty of faeries and half fey. She rolled her eyes.
“They went off to do their own thing,” she said, putting emphasis and air quotes on the word thing. “Keirran got Annwyl on her feet, but then she noticed he was hurt, so off they went to ‘patch him up,’ as she put it.” She turned and pointed with a finger. “They’re in that clump of trees over there, but I wouldn’t recommend checking on them just yet.”
“Believe me, I have no intention at all.”
She grinned, then slipped her arms around my waist, snuggling close with a sigh. My heart jumped, and I wrapped my arms around her as she laid her head on my chest.
“You freaked me out a little back there, tough guy,” Kenzie admitted as her fingers began their maddening circles in the small of my back. “For a second, I really thought you and Keirran would end up killing each other.”
“Yeah,” I muttered, resting my chin atop her head, not knowing what to say. I could blame Guro’s magic, but those feelings of anger and betrayal toward Keirran were already there, just buried deep. I wondered what Keirran had been feeling when he attacked, when his sword had cut into my arm and drawn blood. “I don’t know what happened.”
Kenzie suddenly coughed, hiding her face in her arm, her body shaking violently against mine. Alarm flickered. She felt so breakable all of a sudden, her bones pressing sharply against her skin, the shadow of a bruise I hadn’t noticed before marring the back of her arm.
“Sorry,” she whispered when the fit passed. “Leftover ick from the hospital, I guess. I’ll try not to cough all over you.”
She tried drawing away, but I locked my fingers together and pulled her back.
Kenzie looked up at me, brown eyes widening, and my hea
rt stuttered. Yep, it was official. I was definitely in love. I was in love with a girl who threw herself into danger, bargained with faeries and wouldn’t take no for an answer. Who was stubborn and cheerful and relentless, and could probably beat any opponent...except the thing inside her.
I was in love with a girl who was dying.
You can’t save everyone, Guro’s voice whispered in my head, making my insides cold. Sometimes, you have to make that decision to let them go.
Kenzie blinked slowly, still gazing up at me. “Ethan?”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t do that.”
I frowned, startled. “What?”
“You look at me like I’m already gone. The way my doctors, or my teachers, or even my family does. All sad and resigned and grim. Like they’re staring at a ghost.” Her hand rose, brushing my hair. “I’m still here, tough guy. I’m not done yet.”
A lump caught in my throat, and I swallowed it. Lowering my head, I kissed her, and her arms slid around my neck, pulling us close. I couldn’t promise her forever, but I’d give her everything I had in the time she was here.
“Just promise me one thing,” I whispered as we drew back a little. “When we do see Titania, do not, under any circumstances, make any kind of a bargain with her.” Kenzie raised a teasing eyebrow, but I stayed serious. “I’m not kidding, Mackenzie. Promise me you won’t say anything when we meet Titania. She can’t screw you over in a faery word game if you don’t say anything to her.”
Her eyes flashed. “You make it sound like I’ve never bargained with faeries before. I seem to recall doing just fine.”
“I know.” I tightened my grip on her. “I know I’m being overbearing and overprotective again. But just this once, for my sanity, promise you won’t talk to her. Please.”
“Oh, fine,” Kenzie huffed, rolling her eyes. “Just this once, then. I promise I won’t say anything. But is she really that awful?”
“You have no idea,” I muttered. “Leanansidhe was bad enough, but the Queen of the Seelie Court? She’s the epitome of everything I hate about the fey. She’ll trick you into becoming a deer or a rosebush, just because she can. Because she thinks it’s amusing.”
“He’s right, unfortunately.”
We broke apart as Keirran stepped out of the trees several yards away, Annwyl close behind him. The Summer faery looked almost normal now, bright and solid with no hint of the transparency that had nearly killed her. The amulet pulsed at her throat, causing a chill to creep up my spine when I looked at it. Keirran, I noted, moved a bit stiffly, favoring his right side, but other than that, he seemed fine.
“So,” he said, looking at each of us, “we are going to see Titania.” He winced, and on his shoulder, Razor gave a worried buzz. “That’s going to be...interesting. At least if Oberon is there, he’ll be able to rein her in somewhat. But I think we’re still going to have to deal with Titania herself.” He glanced at me, frowning. “Are you sure you’re okay with this, Ethan?”
“Trust me, I think getting a root canal would rank higher on my list of things to do,” I muttered. “But I think Kenzie is right. The only way to permanently stop the Fade is if Annwyl goes home. And the only way she can go home is if Titania raises the exile.”
“You won’t get her to change her mind,” Annwyl said softly. “Not for free. Not without making some kind of bargain, if she decides to change it at all.”
“We won’t know unless we try,” Keirran said, sounding determined. “And we’re out of options. Titania will let you come back. I can be very persistent.”
“I have a better idea,” whispered a cold, familiar voice, and a figure turned out of nowhere, smiling at us across the glade. “Why don’t you let the girl come with me, and we can return to Phaed together?”
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
RETURN TO THE NEVERNEVER
“Who are you?”
Keirran’s voice had changed again. Soft and lethal, it raised the hair on my arms as the prince drew his sword and stepped in front of Annwyl, his cold gaze on the faery across from us.
“That is unimportant,” the Thin Man said, smiling at us from profile. One pale eye fastened on me. “I have been waiting for you to return, Ethan Chase. I was hoping the Summer girl would have disappeared by now, but it seems you have found something that has temporarily halted the Fade. And now she lingers on in the world. A grievous mistake, I’m afraid.”
Keirran shot me a glance. “Ethan? You know this faery?”
“We’ve met,” I growled, pulling my own swords. “Right before he tried to kill me and kidnap Annwyl.”
“Not true, not true,” the Forgotten said, holding up an impossibly thin finger. “I wish to return things to the natural order. You have seen the state of the Forgotten, yes? How they are being twisted and used for dark purposes. It is his fault,” the Thin Man continued, pointing at Keirran, who straightened, “for forcing their Lady to seek alternate methods of survival. They are no longer allowed to drain the magic of normal fey, so they must turn to new sources of glamour.”
“That was necessary,” Keirran argued, though he sounded a little shaken. “I couldn’t allow any more exiles to be killed. I know the Forgotten are only trying to survive, but taking the lives of others wasn’t the way.”
“The Forgotten are not supposed to be in this world at all!” the Thin Man snapped, narrowing his pale eye at the Iron Prince. “They were forgotten for a reason and must accept that their fate is to Fade from existence. Whether or not this is fair, they are not supposed to be here, to exist, on this side of the Veil. You have disturbed the balance, Iron Prince. Just as your father did, years ago.”
What? I stared at Keirran, shocked. Was he talking about Ash? How? I’d never heard Meghan mention that before. But the Iron Prince nodded grimly, his expression dark.
“I know,” he whispered. “The Lady told me.”
“Then you should know,” the Thin Man went on, “that I am only trying to fix things. To put right the chaos your father began when he and his companions came tromping merrily through my town. I knew I should never have let them go. I shall alter that mistake right now.”
I shook myself out of my shock and gripped my weapons. “I hate to break it to you, pal, but if you think you’re going to take Annwyl, you’ve got another think coming.”
The Thin Man looked at me sadly.
“No, Ethan Chase. It is far too late for that. Her life has become irreversibly tangled with yours and that of the Iron Prince. I can no longer simply cut her string without severing all the threads around her.” He held up one hand, gripping a thin silver blade. Like its owner, I couldn’t even see it except from the side. Razor hissed, baring his teeth, and the Thin Man smiled. “I am afraid I must remove you all from the tapestry.”
Keirran and I didn’t wait. As if on cue, we both lunged forward, slashing at the Thin Man with our blades. Just before we reached him, however, he vanished, turning to disappear from sight. Keirran and I spun together, weapons raised, looking around for our hair-thin attacker.
“Annwyl, Kenzie!” Keirran called as we turned in a wary circle. “Get back! Put something behind you—”
A flash of silver, almost too quick to be seen, stabbed between us, and Keirran’s warning melted into a cry of pain. Blood misted on the air, and the prince staggered back, clutching his arm. I whirled, slashing the air beside him, but the blade whooshed through empty space, striking nothing.
“Not there, Ethan Chase,” sang a voice, and something whapped my bare arm. I yelped, flinching back, seeing the razor edge of the Thin Man vanish into invisibility again. Razor buzzed furiously.
“Bad man!” he cried as Keirran pressed close, protecting my side. “Bad man cheats! Cheater, cheater!”
My arm stung. I spared it a quick glance, seeing a thin line of red slashed across my forearm but no blood. The faery must’ve hit me with the flat of the blade instead of the cutting edge, which meant he was toying with us. I swore under my breath and turned,
weapons ready for the next attack.
It came from behind me, slashing across my back, leaving a blazing streak of fire down my shoulders. I roared a curse and spun, lashing out wildly, hitting empty air, of course. Keirran turned, too, and the point of the silver blade sank deep into his shoulder, making him gasp.
“No!”
The cry came from Annwyl. The Summer faery stepped away from the tree, eyes flashing. A rush of wind surrounded us, tossing leaves, twigs, dust and grass, spinning it into a miniature cyclone. Squinting through the wind, I saw a twig bounce off something in midair, saw several leaves and blades of grass sticking to an invisible wall, and lashed out wildly.
I felt the tip bite into something solid, and a howl of pain rang out as the whirlwind flickered and died. The Thin Man appeared briefly, holding his wrist. He wasn’t looking at me.
“I was wondering what that thing around your neck did, my dear,” he said, gazing at Annwyl. “You’ve become quite the little Forgotten yourself, haven’t you? Draining the magic of others to live. And you don’t even realize who it is you’re killing.”
“What?” Annwyl paled and looked at Keirran. The prince had fallen to one knee, the brightness of his hair faded. Annwyl gasped, and the Thin Man smiled, before he vanished again.
“Annwyl, stay back!” Keirran called, pushing himself to his feet as I stepped up to protect his open side, glaring around the clearing. The glade appeared empty, but I knew the Thin Man was out there, waiting to strike. Dammit, where was the sneaky bastard?
“I don’t see him,” Keirran muttered at my back. “This isn’t working, Ethan. We can’t keep this up forever. He’s just toying with us.”
“I know.”
“Ethan, Keirran!” Kenzie’s voice rang over the glade. “Don’t stand together. Spread out a little! You’re both looking at him from the same angle, which is exactly what he wants. If he faces you straight on, you can’t see him! Move around! Catch him from the side!”
“Clever girl,” hissed the Thin Man, appearing right in front of Kenzie, blade drawn back, and my heart gave a violent lurch. “Perhaps too clever. Be silent, now.”