by Julie Kagawa
“Wait,” Kenzie said before he could open the door. “I’m curious about that. The Thin Man said something to that effect, too. What did the Lady tell you? How is your family connected to all of this?”
Keirran’s gaze darkened. “That’s a long story,” he said softly. “And we don’t have time to discuss it now. When Annwyl is safe, I’ll tell you the whole thing, I promise.”
He opened the door and stepped through without looking back.
I took Kenzie’s hand. “Back into the Nevernever,” I groaned, and she squeezed my fingers in sympathy. “Are you ready for this?”
“Don’t worry about me, tough guy.” Kenzie grinned, her eyes sparkling. “I’ve been waiting for this ever since we got back. Oh, and if you see a dragon, be sure to point it out so I can go poke it with a stick.”
“You know, that would be funny if I wasn’t terrified you’d actually do it.”
She rolled her eyes, pulling me forward. “Come on, Ethan. We’ve already fought some of the nastiest things Faery has to offer. What’s the worst that could happen?”
Never say things like that, I thought as we crossed the threshold and slipped into the closet. The darkness surrounding us cleared, and we stumbled between a pair of gnarled trunks, into the familiar twilight of Faery.
Part III
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
BENEATH THE WATERFALL
We followed Keirran through the wyldwood for several hours, walking beneath huge dark trees that shut out the light, passing shocking flashes of color in an otherwise gray world. The Nevernever was just as strange, murky and dangerous as I remembered from my last trip. Which was only last week, I reminded myself. I wondered what my parents were doing, if I had really crossed the line with this last stunt. I was going to have to talk to them—again—when I got home. I couldn’t rely on Meghan to show up and give me a free pass whenever I went off into Faery. And by the looks of things, that was bound to happen more and more now. My days of hiding from the fey, of hoping they wouldn’t notice me, were over.
Strangely, that didn’t bother me as much as it should have.
I kept my swords out, scanning the trees constantly, ready to act against any nasty fey that tried to ambush us. Amazingly, our hike through the wyldwood was uneventful; except for a will-o’-the-wisp and a curious wood sprite that kept appearing in the branches overhead, I didn’t see any fey.
Night was beginning to fall, the eternal twilight of the wyldwood shifting into darkness, when Keirran led us down a twisty narrow path, beneath a silvery waterfall and into a small cave. The floor was covered in pale sand, and the ceiling glittered with millions of tiny lights, resembling the night sky.
“We’ll stop here for the night,” Keirran said as Razor hopped from his shoulder to roll about in the sand, buzzing. “I’d continue on, but pressing through the wyldwood in the dark is asking for trouble.”
“How far to the Summer Court?” I asked, finally sheathing my weapons. The cave was small and appeared uninhabited, no bones or blood spatters on the wall, at least. I guessed that was as safe as you could get in the Nevernever.
“Not far,” Keirran said. “We should reach it tomorrow. Provided we don’t run into any unforeseen problems.”
Unforeseen problems. Yeah, that still wasn’t likely. I was amazed we’d gotten this far without trouble. And when we did reach the Seelie Court, we would have to deal with our biggest challenge yet: convincing the infamously fickle Queen of the Summer Court to lift Annwyl’s exile and let her come home. I didn’t know how we were going to manage that. Frankly, Titania scared me. I knew the stories. I knew that one wrong word or action could get you turned into a rabbit, or a rosebush, or trapped in the Summer Court forever, dancing for the queen’s amusement. You did not screw around with the queens of Faery. In fact, the only other person I was less enthused about meeting in the entire Nevernever was Mab, the ruler of Winter. I only hoped Keirran had a convincing plan in mind.
Speaking of Keirran, he hadn’t said much through the entire hike. I knew he was concerned about Annwyl, and the amulet sucking away at his glamour was probably on his mind, too, but the flat, blank look in his eyes worried me. He stood at the entrance of the cave now, his back to us, gazing through the falling water.
“Hey,” I said, walking up to him. He turned, looking very tired, and I tapped his shoulder in encouragement. “She’ll be fine,” I said. “We’re almost to the Seelie Court. You’ll just have to convince Titania that it’s in her best interests to raise Annwyl’s exile. I’m sure you can agree on something, right?”
Keirran gave a faint smile. “Titania...doesn’t like me very much,” he admitted. “Well, at all, really. She’s always hated Mom and barely tolerates me when I visit Arcadia. I’m sure the queen will be ecstatic when I come begging her for a favor. She’ll finally have me right where she wants—not even Oberon will be able to help.” He winced, then gave me a grave look. “Ethan, the price Titania will demand of me is going to be very high. You don’t have to come. I don’t want to drag you and Kenzie into this. You can go home if you want.... I won’t hold it against you.”
I snorted as Kenzie joined us, Razor buzzing worriedly from her shoulder. “Wow, is that how I sounded all this time?” I asked the girl, who nodded fervently. “Why didn’t you smack me earlier? Keirran, we’re not leaving. Annwyl is our friend, too, but more important—”
“—we’re not letting you do this alone,” Kenzie finished, giving the prince a fierce look. Maybe it was my imagination, but she sounded rather breathless, as if the walk had taken a lot out of her. Though she continued without hesitation. “And if I have to tell you this as much as I told Ethan, I will. We’re not leaving until this is done, one way or another.”
“Kenzie.” Keirran bowed his head. “I’m sorry for what I did to your family,” he said in a low voice. “Please forgive me. I don’t deserve your friendship, but I’m glad you’re here.” He flicked a glance at me. “Both of you. And I swear, I’ll make everything right when this is all over.”
Kenzie gave him a small smile and started to reply, but suddenly winced and fell, her legs giving out beneath her. Alarmed, I started forward as Keirran caught the girl, steadying her as she sagged against him. Razor buzzed and leaped to the prince’s back, peering down anxiously as I crowded in.
“Kenzie!”
“I’m okay” was the gasping reply. But she didn’t look okay, clinging to the prince, barely able to stand. Keirran gently drew her upright, then stepped back to let me take over. I looped her arm around my neck and lifted her off her feet, ignoring her protests.
Carrying her over to the far wall, I gently sat her down and knelt beside her, watching her face. She was pale, breathing hard, and dark circles crouched under her eyes, making my heart twist. Keirran hovered nearby, his expression concerned, Razor whimpering from his shoulder.
“Kenzie? What happened?”
“It’s all right, Ethan,” she murmured, sounding extremely tired. “I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. I guess I’m not fully recovered from the hospital.”
“I’ll go find some food,” Keirran announced, stepping back. “We haven’t eaten all day, and she’ll need to keep up her strength. I’ll be all right,” he added as I looked up at him sharply. “I’ve hunted the wyldwood countless times. I know what I’m doing. Trust me.”
I didn’t like us splitting up, but Keirran was probably right. The wyldwood was practically his backyard. “Be careful,” I warned, and the prince nodded once, turned and slipped out of the cave with Razor. His bright form glimmered briefly through the curtain of water, the gremlin’s eyes flashing as he looked back, and they were gone.
Kenzie shivered, wrapping her arms around herself as if she was cold. I sat beside her and pulled her into my lap, tucking her close to my body. She sniffed and curled into me, and I held her tight. “Déjà vu, huh?” she whispered, reminding me of another cave with a sandy floor, and Kenzie in my lap, pressed close for comfort. Our first kiss... “
Sorry,” she went on, dropping her head. “I didn’t want you worrying about me when we got here.”
I sighed. “Kenzie, I’ll always worry about you whenever we go into the Nevernever,” I told her, running a hand down her hair. “Or when you follow me into a goblin market. Or when you make a bargain with a faery. I’m always going to worry, and I’m always going to try to protect you. It’s just something you’ll have to accept about me.
“But,” I continued, “when I said I wouldn’t try to stop you anymore, I meant it. I’ll still be insanely overprotective, and you’ll probably want to punch me sometimes, but...I want you here, with me. However long we have—” I slipped my fingers under her chin and gently turned her face to mine “—I want to spend it with you.”
Her eyes prickled as I kissed her. Softly at first, wanting to be gentle. But Kenzie responded with shocking urgency. Her hands fisted in my hair, and her tongue pressed against my lips, demanding entry. And then I stopped being aware of anything but her lips, her scent, her hands on my chest, slipping under my shirt. I groaned against her mouth as soft fingers traced my stomach, making my skin dance and my blood sizzle. My face dropped to her neck, trailing kisses down her shoulder, and she gasped and arched her head back, whispering my name.
Hooking her fingers behind my neck, she leaned back, easing us both to the sandy floor. I shifted so I wasn’t crushing her, gazing down at the girl beneath me, my elbows straddling her head. She was beautiful, an angel who had reached down and yanked me out of my miserable, lonely existence, and dammit if that wasn’t the sappiest thing I’d ever thought but it was completely true. Kenzie smiled up at me, sad and tender and a little scared, and my heart began pounding in my chest.
“Ethan?” She chewed her lip in an uncharacteristic display of nervousness. “Do you want to know the secret I told the bird faery at the goblin market?”
I looked at her, puzzled. Strange that she’d bring that up now. “I guess so,” I said, shrugging. “But only if you want to tell me.”
“I do,” Kenzie said quickly and looked away. “Well, not really, but...um...it’s...it’s something you should know, I think. I mean...” She winced. “Crap.”
Normally, I would’ve found the idea of Mackenzie stuttering cute, as infrequent as it was, and would’ve called her on it. But right now, the last thing I wanted to do was tease and lose whatever was happening between us, whatever this was. I brushed my thumb across her cheek, making her close her eyes, and murmured, “You can tell me.”
“It was that, well...I just...” She sighed and continued in a whisper, “I’ve never...been with anyone before. You know, really been with anyone. And I was afraid I would die before I ever found someone to...you know.” She bit her lip again, brow furrowing. “That’s the secret I traded away. The secret the bird faery knows about me.”
She colored fiercely and averted her gaze. I was having trouble breathing. “I don’t know why I wanted to tell you now,” she went on softly, still not looking at me. “I certainly don’t expect to rectify that here, but...I guess I wanted you to know. In case...” She trailed off again, but I knew what she meant. Everything was borrowed time with Kenzie. Being afraid she would never get the chance to do everything she wanted.
Very gently, I kissed her, just the slightest touch of her lips to mine. “I’ll wait,” I told her softly. “You don’t have to worry about that. Not with me.” A tear slipped from the corner of her eye, and I caught it before it hit the sand. “Whenever you’re ready, just let me know. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”
* * *
When Keirran returned, Kenzie was nearly asleep, drifting off against my chest. She woke up long enough to eat a couple wild pears Keirran had found—after he swore to me about a dozen times they were safe—before curling into me again. I held her quietly, watching as Keirran started a fire, piling wood into a sandy pit before holding his palm over the kindling. Glamour shimmered, and a small flame sprang up to consume the wood, throwing back the shadows. The Iron Prince sat down in front of the fire, drawing a knee to his chest, and brooded into the flames.
Kenzie shifted in my arms, murmuring something about “Alex” in her sleep. I wondered what her family was doing now, what my family was doing now.
By the fire, Keirran’s gaze was dark. Was he thinking of Meghan or Ash? Did he miss his family, or were all his thoughts on Annwyl and the thing connecting them both? The amulet that was slowly killing him.
“You can go to sleep if you want,” he announced without looking up. “I’ll take first watch.”
I smirked and shook my head, speaking quietly so as not to wake Kenzie. “I couldn’t if I wanted to. My irrational paranoia of goblins eating my face while I sleep sort of makes that impossible.”
“That’s probably wise.” Keirran rested his chin on his knee. Razor hopped off his shoulder to poke a twig at the fire. “I didn’t realize Kenzie was so ill,” Keirran said after a moment. “She mentioned being sick, but I just didn’t put it together. I swear, Ethan, I wouldn’t have asked her to come if I knew.”
I snorted. “You wouldn’t have been able to stop her. Trust me, I made that mistake once. It doesn’t work.” I looked down at the sleeping girl in my arms, holding her tighter. “She made her choice,” I said softly. “All I can do now is protect her.”
“Do you ever...?” Keirran paused as if worried he might offend me, then continued. “Do you ever think that there’s something you can do, a deal or bargain you can make, to help her get better? I mean, magic exists everywhere in the Nevernever. If you just accepted the cost—”
“No.” My voice came out slightly choked. “No faery magic, no bargains, no deals. I refuse to gamble for Kenzie’s health. Some prices are too high.”
“Even if it meant saving her life?” Keirran glanced at me, the flames casting weird, flickering shadows over his hunched form.
“Leave it alone, Keirran.”
“I don’t like it, either, but...aren’t some prices worth paying for the one you love?”
“I said leave it alone,” I snapped, and Kenzie stirred against me. Wincing, I adjusted my arms around her and buried my face in her hair. I wish I could, I thought, closing my eyes. I wish there was some way, some bargain or deal or contract, to make you well again, but I know the rules. Nothing is free. Magic and power always come with a price. And maybe that’s selfish and paranoid, but I’m not willing to pay that price, or have you pay that price. Not yet. Not when there’s still a chance you could be okay without it.
Keirran fell silent, and when I looked up again, he had gone back to staring into the fire. Razor was curled up in the sand by the pit, buzzing and twitching in his dreams.
“I envy you sometimes, you know,” Keirran said quietly after a moment. He glanced my way, a faint, bitter smile crossing his face. “Sometimes I wonder what it’s like, being completely human. Not having to deal with the courts and the crazy politics that come with them. Not having to give up the one you love because the ancient law says you can’t be together.” He hunched forward again, staring into the flames. “I know I can’t have her,” he said, his face pinched and tight. “I know when she goes back to Arcadia, we’ll be forced apart. Even if I’m willing to face exile, I can’t do that to her.” He blew out a breath, raking both hands through his silver hair. “I just...I wish there was something, some way to get around this stupid law. My parents did it. Dad went all the way to the End of the World to be with Mom. He even woke up an ancient queen in the process, but they still found a way.”
“So, Ash did wake up the Lady, just like the Thin Man said.”
“Yes,” Keirran sighed, hanging his head. “At least, that’s what she told me. She had been sleeping for centuries, forgotten by everyone in Faery and the mortal world. And then, one day, there was a change in the air. Something broke through her slumber, a glamour so powerful it woke her up and brought her back from the edge of oblivion. When she finally grew strong enough to emerge from the darkness, Faery as she k
new it had changed, and there were many others like her, confused and forgotten. But they were no longer content to sit back and wait for the Fade to take them—they wanted to live. So, she gathered like-minded Forgotten to her side, and eventually they made their way to the mortal world. The ironic part is, she wouldn’t have awoken if my father hadn’t gone on that quest to be with Mom. So you see,” he finished, tossing a stick into the fire, “it’s sort of our fault the Forgotten are here.”
“That might be true,” I said as Kenzie mumbled and shifted against me, making it hard to concentrate. “But that doesn’t mean you’re responsible for them, Keirran. It doesn’t mean you have to help them find a way to live.”
“Doesn’t it?” Keirran looked at me, blue eyes gleaming. “If not me, then who? The other courts won’t help.... They’ll want the Forgotten destroyed. My parents are responsible for bringing their queen into the world again. And...and it’s because of me that they’ve turned to Mr. Dust for the glamour to exist. Because I told the Lady to find another way.” He sighed, resting his chin on his knees. “I’ve made a huge mess of everything, Ethan,” he murmured, narrowing his eyes. “I have to find a way to fix it, but Annwyl comes first. Once she’s safe, I’ll talk to my parents and the other courts about the Forgotten, and we’ll try to find a solution together. But not before I make sure that Annwyl goes home.”
He winced, clenching his fists as his brightness flicked and dimmed a little, before returning to normal. Alarm coursed through me. “It’s the amulet, isn’t it? Does it hurt?”