I knew one thing for sure: something had to give. I wanted Koda back and Bram gone, especially if I couldn’t do anything to help him.
Dagen was awfully quiet during his session with me, and it was clear to me he was lost in his own head. He hardly spoke, even when I asked him questions. He just sat there, two feet away from me, incredibly pensive.
Eventually I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to reach a hand over to him, setting it on his knee. The abrupt action caused him to tense up, his back snapping straight and his eyes to focus on me. “What’s wrong?” I asked. “Is it the…the noise?” Maybe with me touching him, the noise would stop and he’d be able to put all of his attention to the matter at hand.
“Actually,” he finally spoke, dark eyes heavy on me, “it wasn’t. I was…I was thinking.”
The noise wasn’t why he seemed so distant? Color me shocked. “Thinking about what?” I started to take my hand off his knee, but he was quick to set one of his hands atop mine, holding it there.
“No,” he muttered, his fingers curling around mine. “I like it when you touch me.” A blush crept up his cheeks, and I found myself starting to smile at him.
For someone who was ridiculously paranoid, he could be awfully cute at times.
“I just…” Dagen stopped, running a hand through his black hair. “Before this, I was upstairs with Payne. I might have an idea, but I want to discuss it with you and Lucien first. Ian is already aware, as he caught me up there.”
An idea to bring Payne back? I was all for it. More than all for it, actually. Any idea was better than no idea; the research we’d been doing in the library had, so far, yielded no results. I would be down to try anything to revive him. I probably visited his body too much, and every time I did I grew sad because I just couldn’t think of anything to do.
“What’s your idea?” I questioned, needing to know right this very second. If he thought he could tell me he had an idea and then not actually tell me what the idea was, he was so wrong. So very wrong.
He grew quiet, tentative in blurting it out. Dagen was not the type to ever say things like that; he always thought long and hard about them…probably because he was constantly at war with that sound he heard. Here and now? It wasn’t about the sound. He genuinely was hesitant.
Was it that much of an outlandish idea? Would I want to laugh at him for it or immediately say no? I knew I’d thought I’d do anything, but there was a lot in the realm of anything that wasn’t particularly right, or moral—like, you know, necrophilia.
Yeah, I would do nearly anything to try to bring back Payne, but that was not one of them.
“It might not work,” Dagen said. “It might be for nothing.”
“What?” I pressed on, not wanting to let this go. If his idea was something I was willing to try, I’d be all for it.
Dagen’s mouth pursed, and his black eyes fell to my mouth. “I…thought that since Payne is obsessed with blood, maybe blood could bring him back.” He trailed off, waiting for my reaction.
I couldn’t react for a long while, because the moment he suggested blood was the key, I recalled what Victor had told me.
Blood. He’d put so much emphasis on blood, saying it was the key, that I was the key—of course. I should’ve put two and two together sooner. If I was the key, my blood was, too. It made sense, as much as anything could in this place.
And if Dagen’s theory was right, my blood would bring Payne back.
I abruptly stood up, pulling my hand off his knee as I did so. “We have to go to Lucien, tell him your plan.”
“It’s not really a plan, per se,” Dagen said, getting to his feet. Almost immediately, his head cocked to the side. The noise was back, just like that. He struggled to talk over what his mind thought it heard, “It’s just an idea. I don’t know how to best administer the blood to him, if it should be dripped onto his wound, over his heart, in his mouth—”
In his mouth. Like a vampire. Yuck.
“Come on,” I said, moving towards the door of the study. I said nothing else as I led him down the hall. The study was near the library, where we found Lucien, sitting on a leather sofa with his long, strong legs crossed.
God, if a man could instantly make panties wet, it was Lucien. His gruff face, that beard, the way his hazel eyes could zero in on you and make you feel like you were alone in a room surrounded by people. And that didn’t even mention the clothes, the suits he always wore. A muscular man in a suit was exactly the type of man I wanted to throw me over his shoulders and ravish me someplace dark.
Wait. He’d already done that.
“Lucien,” I spoke his name, though it was needless since his gaze had flicked up from the book he was half-deep in the moment I’d strolled into the library. Sunlight streamed in through the windows, reminding me of the day Koda, who I now knew was Bram, had me pinned against the glass, my throat in his hand. The day he’d crashed his lips to mine.
He didn’t seem like he’d wanted to kill me right then. Maybe choke me a little. Definitely do a little more without clothes on, if his hardness had meant anything.
I’d been so scared that day, but also a little turned on. The more I thought about it now, the more I was the latter. That was so many different shades of wrong I didn’t know what to say to myself.
Lucien was slow to close the book—after folding and dog-earing the page he was on. Cringe. He got to his feet, meeting us halfway. His hazel stare darted to Dagen, but it was me who he addressed, “Is something the matter?”
A lot of things were wrong, of course. Bram was locked in the basement. Payne was dead. I was a horny freak around these guys…I mean, the list could go on and on, no joke.
“Dagen has an idea about Payne,” I said, stepping aside and letting the man with the idea continue.
Dagen looked uneasy, as if he hadn’t expected me to drag him before Lucien right away. He shook his head slightly. “It might not work, bear in mind—”
“Enough stalling,” Lucien’s wide chest rumbled, “tell me your idea, Dagen.” He dropped the book onto a small table near him, a look of pure annoyance on his face. “This is clearly not working out. These books…it isn’t like there’s a manual for this place.”
If Lucien didn’t know, if a man made of Victor’s blood didn’t know how this place worked in its entirety, I did wonder if any of us could ever know. Seemed we all fought a losing battle, but one fight at a time. First came Payne, then came Bram/Koda. After that, then…
Then maybe we could try to break whatever curse held these men here, whatever invisible thing made them go crazy.
Yes, one thing at a time.
“Blood,” Dagen said, itching his right ear. “More specifically, Felice’s blood.”
Lucien’s gaze narrowed. He was not happy Dagen was suggesting to spill a bit of my blood to try to bring back Payne. “Explain how you reached that conclusion.” It was an order, coming from him.
“Well, you said yourself that Felice is the key, and she’s connected to each of us. Payne’s obsession was always blood, so…I inferred that, perhaps, Felice’s blood might awaken him from his deathly slumber, or whatever you want to call it,” Dagen spoke in a hurry, apparently not liking the intensity radiating off Lucien.
He was a very authoritarian man, intimidating in every way. It was probably too soon for me to declare any feelings of love, but…I wanted to. Staring at Lucien while he glowered at Dagen really made me want to.
Lucien folded his arms over his chest, and my eyes fell to the muscles underneath the suit. The moments we’d stolen away, I still hadn’t seen him fully naked, hadn’t raked my eyes over each and every muscle that sat on his body.
My own body heated up in thought of it, even though now was not the time for such thoughts.
Because it looked like Lucien was going to say no, I spoke up, “Victor told me the answer was blood. I think Dagen might be right.” Lucien’s expression darkened when I mentioned Victor’s name, but that didn’t stop me f
rom going on, “He’s not saying to bleed me dry. Just a bit. I’m willing to try it.”
“No,” Lucien said, shaking his head.
“No?” I echoed, frowning. “You don’t get to tell me no. Didn’t we have this discussion already?” He frowned, but his intense frown didn’t stop me from continuing, “I want to do everything I can to help Payne and bring him back. If that means giving him some of my blood, I’ll do it without question.”
Lucien let out a grumble and a sigh at the same time. “You have no idea the costs this place demands, Felice. You think, if this works, it’ll only be a little blood? No, it will be more. It will be never-ending. It is not a good idea to feed Payne’s obsession, even if it brings him back—”
I held my head up high. “Your opinion is noted and ignored.”
His brows came together, and he started towards me. Just by the expression he wore, I knew what he was going to say. I also knew that he was only trying to protect me, but at this point, he had to realize he wouldn’t be able to shield me forever. Sometimes someone else got the best of him, sometimes it was the house itself.
“I will not have you put yourself in danger just to save Payne,” Lucien growled out. “I won’t have it. If you think I’ll let you up into the third floor ever again, you couldn’t be more fucking wrong.”
I glanced at Dagen, saying, “Will you excuse us?” Dagen nodded dumbly, and I snatched Lucien’s hand, dragging his fuming self out of the library, not stopping until we were in his office, someplace that he and I could hash this out in private, with a closed door.
Not that I thought this would get loud, but…okay, that’s exactly what I thought.
“I don’t know why you brought me in here,” Lucien muttered, moving to sit on his high leather chair. The same chair he’d been dead in. The same chair I saw his bleeding, motionless body sitting in before I knew just how strange this place truly was. Once he sat back, fighting with himself to look relaxed, he added, “This discussion is over.”
“It most certainly isn’t,” I said, hoping I looked stern as I moved to stand before his desk. “Whether you like it or not, I’m going to try it. I’m just trying to get you on board because I can only imagine how impossible you’ll be if I did it without you agreeing.”
Lucien could only glare at me.
His glares did not make me waver. They might’ve made me warm in certain places, but, like I said, it was impossible to not be turned on while in Lucien’s presence. “If you think your glares are going to make me back down, you’re wrong. How would you even keep me from going upstairs? You going to lock me in my room? Chain me up somewhere like Bram?”
“Oh, I have some ideas,” he muttered, an undertone in his words I picked up on.
I leaned forward, pressing both palms flat against the top of the desk. His clutter was mainly on his side; the outer side was clear. I was not above swiping all the stuff off his desk just to pout and make my point, though. “Lucien, listen to me carefully, because no matter what I say, it’s like you’re not hearing me. I am going to try to give Payne some of my blood, whether you agree or not.”
One of his hands clenched into a fist, and as I watched him scowl at me, I couldn’t help but remember Victor, how hot and cold he’d be. Almost cruel in his own way. Lucien spoke, “You are a defiant one, aren’t you?” The hand that was a fist slowly uncurled, stopping only when a finger lifted out of it, and he made the come hither motion.
It was probably a stupid thing, to go over to him, but I found myself curious. Did he keep chains in every room, ready to snap onto wrists when you defied him? Did he always come prepared to punish you when you were bad? I didn’t think I was into that stuff, but standing there, watching him call me closer without actually saying the words, made my lady parts quiver.
“And why should I come over to you?” I asked, just like he said: defiant.
“Because I’m telling you to” was his answer, and he left it at that, setting his hand down on the armrest of the chair.
Because I’m telling you to. Well, that was as good of a reason as any, I supposed. Even though I was well aware I might regret going to him, I moved around his desk, inching toward him. Once I moved to his side of the desk, I saw an imprint in his pants. Though it was only a slight bulge, it was an impressive bulge nonetheless.
So, arguing with me made him hard, huh? That was…not a revelation I ever thought I’d have, but this place just kept surprising me.
Once I was close enough to him, his arm darted out, strong fingers wrapping around my wrist before pulling me down, onto his lap, setting my butt directly over his growing hard-on. My body immediately got ideas, and I fought to keep my sanity.
It was unreasonably difficult to keep myself in check while on the lap of this magnificent man.
His other hand grabbed my free wrist, and he held both my arms aside, leaning back in his chair to cause me to fall back into him, my back fitting snugly against his wide, muscular chest. “Defiant, and yet you still came to me,” he whispered.
Suddenly the fabric of my dress felt too tight, too constricting. I felt hot all over, and I knew it was because of him.
Darn it. This was supposed to be about Payne, not us.
“So not too defiant after all,” he added, leaning his face down into the crook of my neck. Right into my hair, but he didn’t care. His fingers tightened on my wrists to the point where I winced, but I didn’t tell him to stop, didn’t tell him he was going too far.
We’d probably hit that point eventually, but here and now, that wasn’t it.
“Why would you put yourself in danger for Payne? Your life is worth—”
“Don’t say that,” I told him. “You know what I did. My life is not worth more than any of yours. I don’t care if it’s dangerous. I don’t care if you think it’s stupid. I’m going to try, because I hope you and the others would do the same if the position was reversed and I laid on that table, dead.”
Lucien’s chest rumbled. “I would do anything to bring you back, Felice. Anything.”
“And that’s what I’m doing for Payne,” I told him, breathing in deeply when I felt his lips find a tender spot in my neck.
“Now that I have you,” he murmured, his lips brushing against my throat with every word, “I don’t want to lose you. I can’t.” Desperate words from a man who’d probably never been desperate in his life.
Granted, his life had never truly been a life, but…
His hands loosened on my wrist, traveling up my arms and moving at a snail’s pace. One arm ended up wrapped around my stomach, holding me against him, and the other landed on my neck, fingers curling around it someplace between gentle and rough.
The action reminded me of Victor, but I knew that man shouldn’t cross my mind while I was with Lucien.
“Sometimes you drive me crazy,” Lucien spoke, his fingers digging into my neck and causing a warmth to blossom between my legs. The hardness beneath me was full-blown now, and I’d be lying if I declared sex wasn’t on my mind.
It was impossible not to obsess about, surrounded by these strange, peculiar guys.
But now wasn’t the time for it, as much as I wanted otherwise. Now was the time to march upstairs and try to revive Payne, bring him back to this twisted house. Not a great place to return to, but there were no other options. Grimmstead was all of our homes now; there was no leaving it.
Not yet, anyway. I still held hope that eventually I’d be able to step off its property, though I had no idea if the guys would ever be able to. If they weren’t…what would I do? Would I wave at them in the metaphorical rearview mirror? Could I leave them here and forget they existed, live my life as I should’ve lived it by trying to be normal?
Maybe it was dumb, but I didn’t think I could do that. Not now, not after meeting these guys and starting to know their secrets, their souls and their desires.
No. I couldn’t leave them.
As much as I wanted to give into the hand curling around my throa
t and the erection poking against my lower backside, I found myself saying, “Would it drive you crazier if I told you there was someone I wanted to see before trying the plan with Payne?” I left it vague purposefully, knowing there was no way Lucien wanted me to go down there, let alone see him after what he did.
Lucien rumbled, “Why?” He knew who I meant; he didn’t need to ask for clarification.
“Because I want him to know he’s next.”
“You cannot—”
Even though his hand was around my throat, I still managed to turn my head a bit and glare at him. My icy glare stopped him cold; I would not be told what I could and couldn’t do. Didn’t Lucien understand this already?
Closing those beautiful hazel eyes for a moment, Lucien frowned. “Fine, but I am accompanying you. I will not let you see him alone.”
That, I knew, was as good of an answer as I was going to get.
Chapter Twelve – Bram
I missed the daylight. Hah, never imagined I’d ever have a thought like that, but here I was, chained to the wall in the basement, with just enough slack on the manacles to let me sit on the dirty floor, doing just that. Missing the daylight. The sun. The largeness of the house and everything inside it.
Fuck. Even the people.
Yes, I missed the people. Payne and his freaky paleness. Dagen and his annoying paranoia. Ian and his smug, haughty ways. And, of course, who could forget Lucien and his domineering nature that always had to be in control?
You know, Koda’s voice rang in my head, if you let me take control, neither of us would have to be down here. We could be out there, feeling the sun on our skin. This punishment doesn’t have to last forever.
I rolled my eyes. I currently sat hunched on the floor, leaning my head back on the stone wall behind me. There was hardly any light down here; the basement of this place had been nearly untouched with time. No electricity, no heat.
Nice try, I mused, grinning to myself, but no. This is still my show.
Bram, you’re the reason we’re down here. You’re the reason Lucien locked us up. If you don’t pull it together, we will never leave this place. Koda was yelling, and he hardly ever rose his voice. He was such a nice boy, the opposite of me entirely.
Grimmstead Academy: Submission Page 12