by Mia Ford
“Knight, you have been a shining beacon in a life of shadows and darkness. I’ve always considered myself to be invincible and broken like a doll. It’s a sharp contrast. Where my body is strong and resilient, my mind is shattered into a million pieces. I take on opponents in the cage because it makes me feel good to beat somebody up. I like the adrenaline rush and I crave the exhilaration of putting somebody down for the count. It pleases me greatly to hear them tap out in anguished cries of pain.” I’d never needed anything like this before and I wasn’t sure what had come over me to make this kind of confession.
“I know that feeling in a different way. I got the same rush from watching you pummel that man into submission. I would love to be in your corner for your next fight. I would understand if you felt it was a distraction.” The ambulance was moving at breakneck speed, breezing through traffic and letting those on the street know they were coming.
“It appears the both of us are built from the same stuff in vastly different ways. I would say that we are both uniquely qualified to be more than just business acquaintances. I’m driven by something I can’t explain. It’s not a cross I bear lightly. My choices and the mistakes I make are mine.” I had been a witness to the perfect crime. There was a blind spot in the alley which I had recognized from the moment I had arrived at the restaurant. I insisted we go in there away from prying. It had put us in danger.
“I don’t even know what to say. Nobody has ever taken a bullet for me. You have touched me more than you can ever know. I hope it will continue for many years to come.” I did my best not to complain, but the pain was quite extensive. I could only hope one day I could hang up the gloves and live normally with the white picket fence. I just didn’t see myself becoming a homemaker with little kids tugging at my apron to get my attention.
“Nobody knows what the future holds, but I don’t want to face it without you. I’m not one to admit my feelings and I really did believe I had none to get in the way of living my life. You changed things. A part of me wants to slap you.” I was locked away with my feelings my only friend. I was my own worst enemy and standing in the way of my happiness was my own stubbornness.
“I’m not the kind of man that makes plans for the future. I deal with the here and now. It’s not the right way to go about business, but it has worked for me in the past. I do find myself wanting you to stick around. The person responsible for this is still out there and we need to work together to find him before he is able to find me again. I make no guarantees, but I’m trying very hard to think of any reason why this won’t work between us” I wanted somebody real without the necessary baggage weighing him down.
“I’m not suggesting that we spend our whole lives together. I get a queasy stomach every time I think about walking down the aisle in white. There is nothing virginal about me and I wouldn’t want to pretend with god overseeing the proceedings. I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. I like you a lot, but marriage has never entered into my vocabulary.” I’d thought about it when I was a child, but that was when I was still living the dream.
“We’ll get you patched up and then we’ll find who did this and make them pay. It’s a strange thing in life when you don’t realize yours dream. Girls have come and gone like a revolving door in my bedroom, but you’re not like them in any way. This feeling I have for you is bigger than the both of us combined.” He hadn’t said the three words and I felt like I would break out in hives if he did.
There was a cost for what I did for a living and it took a toll on my body as well as my mind. I was thinking it over and I knew the killer was not going to rest on his laurels. There was no telling if he would lie low or decide to strike while the iron was hot. What I had done to protect him was by the luck of the Irish. Some would have been too shocked to react, but I was not of that same sentiment.
It felt like god was trying to tell me something and he was making it impossible for me not to hear his words. The good book was much forgotten, but there were still some things in my life that didn’t make any sense without some divine intervention. I had never had a need to put on the bulletproof dress, but for some reason, I felt compelled to put it on. I wasn’t even aware that I was doing it. There were times I wished that I could shut my penthouse mouth and become the wholesome girl any man would love to introduce to their family. It just wasn’t in me to conform.
We arrived at the hospital and he was told to stay outside while they treated the wound. They gave me something for the pain, even though I insisted not to administer any drugs. They couldn’t stop me from screaming and the only way to prevent me from injuring myself was to sedate me.
Chapter nine
“I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to leave. You’re doing this against doctor’s orders and I want you to know there are risks. You may not think it’s serious, but you had a bullet invade your body. It’s something you should take very seriously. If you insist on leaving against my orders then you need to avoid strenuous activity. Rest and drink plenty of fluids. Make sure the bandage is changed twice or three times a day as needed. I’m going to give you a prescription and I want you to fulfill it at the nearest pharmacy.” Dr. Grover was being a bit of a poison pill, but I understood he was just doing his job.
“Don’t worry; I’ll make sure she takes her medication on time. She will be convalescing at my penthouse until she is strong enough to leave on her own accord. I don’t know how to thank you for all the good work you have done over the last couple of days. It can’t be easy with a patient who thinks she knows her body better than a professional.” Knight was giving me the evil eye. I turned a blind eye thinking that they were being way too overprotective.
“I’ve never had a more stubborn patient in my life. You really do have your hands full with this one, Knight. I’ll be sure to add this to the considerable bill that you already have. I know you are good for it. I only surround myself with people that are able to pay considerably for my services. Please, keep me informed of any complications. I will be more than happy to make a house call.” With the kind of money Knight was paying, it was a wonder that he wasn’t going to have around the clock care for me.
“There’s not much you can tell her to make her sit still for any length of time. I find myself wondering if maybe restraints are necessary to keep her from doing something stupid.” The idea of being tied down against my will by anybody but knight would have sent a freezing chill of terror down my spine. Just the thought of being his captive made me want to rage in between the sheets until we emerged in the morning for a necessary smoke.
It was a bad habit and one that I had conquered a few years ago. I’d heard of too many horror stories of patients dying of lung cancer. It seemed like a painful way to end one’s life. It wasn’t easy by any means, but it was worth it to finally get the monkey off my back.
“God help me, but I like her independent spirit and not many can show that kind of moxie. She spits on death and I only wish some of my other patients could fight tooth and nail to survive like she has. The bullet did go clean through, but there were some complications with infection which she was able to fight off with the necessary medication and rest. I know that I can’t police her actions, but she needs to take it easy. Those stitches are some of my finest handiwork. I don’t want her to ruin them.” The Dr. didn’t have to know, but I had a fight in less than two days. There was no way I was going to miss the opportunity to take out the legend herself. She was known as the dragon’s head and her moves were more like a deadly ballet recital.
“I’ll do what I can to keep her off her feet.” We shared a knowing glance with both of us thinking the exact same thing. I could almost see the vision in his head of us twisting in a prone position with the bed rocking back and forth against the wall. Having relations with a client was one of my strict rules to avoid at all cost. I had let him beyond the perimeter of what I considered the safe zone.
“I only want you to take the medication when it’s absolutely necessa
ry. These are very strong and quite addictive. It’s not a road you want to take and I’ve seen some hard luck cases. I don’t see you having that problem. You’ll find a way to endure without taking the drugs. I need to go, but I wanted to stop in to make sure you weren’t giving the nurses a hard time. You have a few of them crying and others reluctant to come into your room without you being properly sedated. I’ve never seen anything quite like it.” I was not comfortable with people taking blood at all hours of the night and day.
“They won’t have to worry about that very much longer. Once you leave here, I’m getting dressed and blowing this place. I’ve been here long enough. You don’t know this about me, but I can’t stand being around sick people. You may claim this place is clean, but we both know the truth. I don’t want to be just another statistic and a reason for you to sweep it under the rug to cover it up.” He was shaking his head in disbelief. The Johnny gown I was wearing fell to my feet before the doors even closed.
“It’s not going to hurt you to stay a couple of more days so they can reevaluate your condition.” I ignored what he said, going to the closet and retrieving my clothing. The dress was a little worse for wear. It would need some alterations. There was also a pair of jeans which Knight was able to procure for me at a local boutique down the street.
“You don’t know anything. This place is a death trap ready to ensnare me and drag me straight to hell. I have no interest in staying here for any longer than necessary. I’m leaving and you can either help or get out of my way. At this point, I couldn’t care less which decision you make.” It was difficult, but I managed to put on the jeans and the sweater. I put on my cowboy boots. It was something in my possession that had not seen the light of day since a Halloween party.
They still fit like a glove and reminded me of how little use I had gotten out of them. I grabbed my gray ski jacket, putting it on and shuffling towards the door. The only thing I could think about was escaping the cesspool of germs all around me. I always wore a mask when I went to the hospital to visit anyone.
“I’m going to make it my personal mission to make sure you heal without any interruptions. For the time being, I’m going to stay at home working in my home office. I’m not going out for any other reason than to get a breath of fresh air on the top of the roof. I know what you would say if I were to even mention Home Care. This way, I can take care of you myself. I already know how stubborn you can be and throwing things at me is not going to do you any good.” I was about to object, but he put his hand up for silence like I was a petulant child. He was getting on the last nerve that wasn’t already frayed.
“I don’t want you waiting on me hand and foot. I’ll get up on my own. The one thing that I won’t lose because of this injury is my independence. You can make whatever conclusions you want about my attitude. I have my own way of doing things. The only routine I follow is a morning ritual. I will not let anything interrupt something that has worked for me.” I was making sure he knew where I stood and there was no mention of our feelings.
“I’ll be there when you need me, but only when you ask for help. You do know there’s no shame in asking for help. I wouldn’t know because I usually do everything on my own. If something goes wrong then it’s on my head and nobody else. There is sometimes a necessity to delegate, but I try to limit that as much as possible. I don’t even have a vice president, but I do have a girl Friday that takes care of everything I can’t.” I had a feeling he was going to find the girl he was referring to was no longer in his employ. He had given her the day off to let cooler heads prevail, but I could read the signals on your face like indelible ink.
She was fed up pining over someone more concerned with money than settling down. He was just going to have to find somebody else to tote his barge and get his coffee in the morning. She could probably ruin him by leaving him without arranging for somebody to take her place. I did see her being vindictive enough. She was hurt and wanted to make him feel the same pain.
I looked at Knight and I felt sick to my stomach for all the sappy things I had said in a moment of weakness. I could only hope he would never mention it again and we could leave it as ramblings of a crazy woman.
“My Dr. said you were the worst patient not including myself of course. We can both be a handful when it comes to taking care of ourselves. You mentioned something about a morning ritual. I can have anything you need sent to the penthouse. It’s just one of many properties which I utilize when I’m not traipsing around the globe.” Somebody must have been following him and for me not to notice meant that there was more to the assailant than met the eye.
I hadn’t thought of someone with the kind of training that would make mine pale in comparison. I was a force to be reckoned with, but this guy had gotten too close for comfort. Taking him out of the equation was foremost on my mind, but I was in no shape to raise a finger. It was a good thing Knight was taking the necessary steps to stay out of the limelight for the conceivable future. Only those allowed entry into his inner sanctum would be able to get close enough to hurt him. He would have necessary meetings, but most would take place over conference video calls.
“I don’t have anything bulky and the only thing I use as resistance in my training is my own body and whatever I can find. I will need some necessary sundries, but I think that I can manage with what you have.” I was going to miss the hot and cold running room service. I was planning to stay there for several days, but the decision was taken out of my hands.
“I have a fully equipped gym in my penthouse which you can use at your discretion. The only thing I ask is that you don’t overdo it for the first couple of days. Ease into it and make sure your muscles are ready to attack any kind of weight.” He was babying me and I didn’t like feeling like an invalid needing somebody to make all the decisions for me.
“I do require certain foods. I don’t eat processed crap. I will write you down a list of ingredients and I will prepare the food myself. Please don’t tell me you have a chef on hand. I’d really like to think that you weren’t that pretentious.” He was helping me put on my coat and then he retrieved the necessary paperwork along with the wheelchair. It was standard operating procedure, but I felt it wasn’t necessary. I could walk on my own steam.
“I know we haven’t discussed what was said in the alley, but we’re going to have to address the elephant in the room. You might be scared of your feelings. I’m not exactly immune to the way you’re feeling. I’ve come to care for you more than most people in my life. I find myself at a loss to know what words to say to convey what you mean to me. I’m not used to putting myself out there for any reason. You have given me the courage to stand in the face of what could be a possible rejection.” He didn’t seem like he was afraid of anything, but it was true about not knowing how another person thinks without standing in their shoes.
“I really don’t feel comfortable talking about it. We will revisit this, but you must know some of the things I said were because I thought I was dying. It’s no excuse, but it is a reasonable explanation. I don’t like to talk about these things. I’ve never had an occasion to care about anything more than myself. This is what I call new territory. I’m afraid of any kind of land mines which might blow up in my face. I certainly don’t want to say anything to offend you.” He wheeled me out to his personal car. He helped me to gingerly slip inside to the opulence of wealth.
Chapter ten
I was in no shape for anything physical. I still craved the feel of his hands roaming over my body. We had just finished supper and I was sitting with my feet up watching TV. I was feeling bored to tears. I couldn’t stand reality television and everything else was so fake it was hard to watch without making comparisons with my own military career.
“I have personally arranged for you to have a massage. This is the table I use when I require somebody to relieve my stress. I’m no stranger to the happy ending, but it really does leave me wanting. It’s pleasurable at the time, but it ends too quickl
y. I’m left feeling empty inside.” I didn’t need to know about his need for a woman to tug his privates. I couldn’t understand why he was telling me any of this. There were no secrets between us.
I walked over to the table behind him, shedding my robe and not at all embarrassed by my naked body. The only thing concerning was the bandage wrapped around my midsection which I had already changed twice since arriving here. The view was spectacular with the lights of the city making me feel like I was small in comparison.
“You can either take off the robe or I can…Oh, my…I suppose I asked for that. Damn, I forgot how delicious you look. I have missed giving you my undivided attention.” He was looking at me and making me blush which was something I’d never done for anybody.
“I don’t want you to think this gives you license to get one out of the chamber. I would be more than willing to watch you and maybe give you whispers of encouragement. I’m sure it would bring back some very vivid memories of your childhood. The only big difference is a real woman would be sitting beside you while you were taking matters into your own hands. Give it some thought and you can tell me what your decision is after we are getting ready for bed.” For the most part, I was able to do everything on my own with a bit of difficulty.
“You have raised an interesting subject for debate. I’ve never put on a show, but the idea really does have me going. It could be very entertaining.” I lay down on the table with my head looking at his Gucci loafers polished to perfection. He squirted warm oil onto my naked back. I sighed with contentment as he kneaded my muscles. I thought for sure he had somebody coming over to give me this massage, but he had taken an active role with his own hands.